One (Last) Chance
by Kirsh
Summary: Sent back to the beginning, Squall must come to terms with why. Though he knows how the timeline is supposed to go, he realizes he may not have the strength to stay on the path. Especially where it concerns Seifer.
1. Chapter 1

One - Squall POV

I knew something was terribly wrong when I opened my eyes and found myself staring at a ceiling that I shouldn't have been staring at. Then the pounding started, the fierce pain deep inside my head and right between my eyes. I reached up and touched my forehead, almost afraid of what I was going to find. My fingers encountered bandages. I shot upright, then groaned as the pounding in my head grew worse.

"I see you're awake. You shouldn't be moving yet."

I looked up at Dr. Kadowaki. She was studying me with that healer's gaze, that look that was still so familiar even though it had been months since I had been laying here in this bed.

There was true concern in her eyes when she asked me, "Can you say your name for me?"

"...Squall Leonhart."

"Good. Who's your instructor? Quistis Trepe, correct? I'll go call her and have her come get you. Just lay back and rest."

Since my head agreed with Dr. Kadowaki, I settled myself back on the bed and stared at the ceiling. My eyes burned, but I wasn't sure if it was from the pain or because I wanted to cry. I was back at the beginning of it all. And I knew _everything_ that was going to happen from this day forward. Why? Why was I being tortured like this? Hadn't I done enough? I had just wanted to die in peace, knowing that I had done all I could. That I had given everything to save the world from a psychotic sorceress. My reward for that was supposed to be rest. Not this.

I turned my head to catch her eyes. Sis seemed startled that I was looking right at her. She hadn't acted like that when she first came here to see me, but then, I hadn't exactly looked at her with any sort of recognition, either. I wanted to say something, but I couldn't think of anything to say. What could I tell her? That it was somehow her fault that Time Compression happened? That it was because of her the whole war started? Somehow, it didn't seem fair. I let her talk to me, then when she was gone, I pushed myself up and swung my legs off the bed. I was standing by the time Quistis arrived, and she looked shocked by my sudden recovery.

"I knew it'd either be you or Seifer." she said in that authoritative voice. I didn't bother to reply. I simply walked out of the infirmary, leaving her to splutter and try to catch up to me.

I walked blindly, not feeling well enough to run. I saw the faces of people I knew would be dead in a matter of weeks and heard the voices of people who would be looking to me to save all of them.

"Is there something on your mind?"

"...Not really." Yes, a thousand things were on my mind. Why had I been sent back here? What was I supposed to do?

"Not really."

I knew what was coming next so I let her laugh. I just kept walking, forcing her to keep up with me.

"I feel like I'm beginning to understand my student a little. That's all." Quistis said with a slight smile on her face.

I stopped. I slowly pivoted to look at her and said, "Why would you say something stupid like that?"

Her mouth dropped open in surprise. I watched her for a minute, and she watched me, unsure if I was joking or being serious. I left it at that, heading to class. I knew today was the field exam, and I didn't know how it was going to go now. I sat at my desk without looking at Seifer, already knowing he'd be pissed as all hell. Even more so when Quistis called him out for hurting me. I glanced at him and wondered if he would believe me if I told him what was going to happen to him. I was still confused as all hell, maybe even a little scared.

While Quistis talked, I accessed my computer and sought out Shiva and Quetzacoatl. Would they recognize me through time? Would they begin to erase my memories as soon as I junctioned with them? I decided to hold them in reserve for a little while, until I was sure. Since I was going to have to go with Quisitis to the Fire Cavern anyway, I figured I'd get the opportunity to talk to Ifrit. If he recognized me, then so would the others.

This time I caught Selphie this time instead of running into her. I still refused to show her around the Garden. I had too much to worry about now to deal with something like that. As I stood out in the sunshine, I stared at the sky. I could easily remember how I felt today, months ago. I was edgy. I was excited. I was scared. My entire future would be determined by what I did or didn't do today. And now I knew exactly what I was going to do, how it would affect the people around me, and most importantly, whose lives it would change. I didn't like having this kind of responsibility the first time around, and now I was going to have to do it again? The only difference was, as far as I knew, this wasn't Time Compression. I really _had_ been sent back months into my past. The question was, why?

Always freakin' why?

I took a deep breath and headed out of Garden to meet up with Quisitis. I didn't take her up on her offers of trying to teach me how to use my gunblade (as if I'd forgotten _that_ ) and I was incredibly surprised to find that Lion Heart had traveled back in time with me. That would make fighting so much easier, and it was doubtful I'd even need to junction with the GF's. I was also full on the higher level magic that Ultimecia hadn't destroyed, so I felt no need to use any of the abilities junctioning with a GF would give me.

I completely ignored Quistis as we entered the Fire Cavern on a ten-minute time limit. I doubted I would need that much. Everything we encountered died with one hit from me, and maybe I was over-doing it a little. But I had a bit of pent-up frustration and wanted to take it out on something. When we reached the center of the Fire Cavern, I half-expected Ifrit not to show up. But he did, appearing just like before. I dimly heard Quistis ask me if I was ready, and I shrugged my shoulders. I focused on Ifrit.

 _There's something I want to ask you._ I said silently, banking on the fact that he was still my GF, even if I technically hadn't defeated him yet.

 _Fight me, human, and I will answer you._ Ifrit replied, his deep voice rolling through my mind. I felt his amusement; yes, he was still mine, but he wanted to test me again. I glanced at Quistis, but she was gripping her whip with her face in a determined mask. I readied Lion Heart and focused on Ifrit.

 _What's happening to me?_ I asked with my first strike.

 _It should be obvious._

 _Well, it's not!_

I traded blows with him for a while, with Quistis acting as useless backup. Since Ifrit matched my current strength, we were even, and I realized he was giving me a chance to unleash all my frustration on him. I attacked harder and harder, short of triggering Renzokuken, beating on the Guardian Force as much as he beat on me.

 _Time Compression picked up on your wish. It sent you back to make your wish come true._ Ifrit said at last, as he knelt panting on the floor before me. _I can't answer more than that. You're the one who knows why._

I stared at the GF for a long while, feeling drained and tired. It was only after Quistis told me to go get changed and meet her at the main hall for my group assignments that I realized what was happening. After we beat Ultimecia, we were all separated in the Time Compression. I remember wandering the wastelands with nothing but my thoughts and regrets for company. I remember seeing him, broken and bleeding, and knowing that it was all my fault. If maybe I had just reached out to him, if I had just asked him... stopped him. Made him see. If maybe I had just told him...

It wasn't about stopping the Third Sorceress War.

It wasn't about defeating Ultimecia.

My motives for being here were purely selfish.

I wanted to save Seifer.


	2. Chapter 2

Two - Seifer POV

Squall was acting strangely. Stranger than usual. He'd fought with the usual intensity and concentration, which always got my blood running hot. I lost myself in the fight - it was supposed to be training, but it got out of hand. It always did where Squall was concerned. Maybe it was the way those stormy grey eyes stared at me, seeing me, watching for the slightest tell. Maybe it was the way he moved, as lithe as the cat on his pendant. When we fight, it's like we're the only two people in the world; he's solely focused on me and nothing else. I gave him the same sort of respect when we fought, but something about our last duel made me want to win no matter what the cost. And I won. I cut that beautiful face of his right between the eyes and it should've ended there. But then he came back in the very last second and returned the injury.

Then he passed out.

I carried him to the infirmary and dumped him there, not waiting around to get myself lectured by Kadowaki or anyone else. I don't know why I bothered. I could've just used a Cure spell on the two of us and no one would've ever known what had happened. But I didn't.

Now we were in the ship, listening to Xu talk about the SeeD exam mission in Dollet. I wasn't paying much attention to her. I never did. It wasn't that I didn't _want_ to obey orders, it was that I always saw an opportunity to do the right thing. The last exam mission I'd gone on showed me the SeeD didn't care about anything but the mission - get it done, no matter what. I'd saved the lives of five cadets on my squad by ordering them to flank the enemy instead of sending them head on into the midst of them. And _I_ had been the one punished.

But as Xu talked, I focused on Squall. He was sitting in his typical position, arms crossed on his knees and head bowed. He wasn't looking at the board, at Xu, or anyone else. I knew he was listening because his head was slightly cocked to one side, but otherwise his eyes were riveted to the ground. He hadn't said one word during the meeting where Quistis assigned us to the same squad, and he hadn't paid much attention to Zell other than to tell him to sit down and shut up and no, he wasn't going to show him his gunblade in the car.

"Any questions?" Xu asked when she finished. When we remained silent she said, "Oh, I know this goes without saying, but the order to retreat takes priority."

When she left, Squall abruptly rose from his seat and headed toward the door of the ship.

"Squall, where are you going?" Quistis asked.

"I'm going to check outside." He glanced at me then, his face emotionless. "That's what you were going to order me to do, right?"

I blinked. I'd been about to tell him to do just that, too. I smirked. "That's what I like to see in my squad. Initiative. You could learn a thing or two from Leonhart, chicken-wuss."

"Stop calling me that!"

Squall was already topside when I turned to look at him. When we landed, I caught him staring blankly at the sand, his eyes unfocused. It was a brief moment, and when he met my gaze, I felt a cold fist grab hold of my spine. Those stormy grey eyes weren't filled with nervousness or fear; they were filled with a quiet determination, as if he already _knew_ he was going to succeed here. Then he looked away and waited for the order to move out.

When we reached the square, I knew something wasn't right with the lion. He was holding back during the battles, letting me and Zell take out the Galbadian soldiers. And when I asked him where he'd gotten the beautiful blue gunblade he now held, and when I asked him why he hadn't used it during our duel, he just stared at me. Then he turned away and went to lean against the wall of a building, arms folded over his chest.

"Don't kick the dog."

I froze, one leg half raised to do just that. Squall was standing behind me, arms at his sides, eyes locked on mine. I set my foot back down and pointed at his gunblade. "Tell me that beauty's name and I won't."

"...Lion Heart."

I couldn't help myself. I started laughing. I sobered only when his expression didn't change. He continued to stare at me. "What?" I asked, as I calmed myself. "Something on my face?"

"Why didn't you use Cure?"

"Huh?" The question threw me. Squally-boy definitely wasn't the same kid I'd fought this morning. There was something different about him. It was like there was a different person standing in front of me, rather than the Squall I'd known all my life. I rubbed the bridge of my nose, feeling the puckered skin of the scar each time my finger swiped across it. "I guess I wanted proof."

"Proof?"

"Proof that we really did have a knock-down drag-out no holds barred fight."

One elegant eyebrow rose. "That's why?"

I sighed. I glanced at Zell, making sure the chicken-wuss wasn't close enough to hear our conversation. I caught Squall making the same look before focusing back on me. I pointed casually at the scar between his eyes. "You had my mark. It's only fair I had one of yours."

"So... like a claiming?"

There was that cold fist again. What the hell had gotten into Squall? Had I hit him harder than I thought? Beyond him saying more words today than he had all the years before, he was definitely being un-Squall-like. Before I could say anything, Squall stiffened.

"What is it?" I asked, half thankful I didn't have to answer, and now more curious than ever before.

"Soldiers are coming."

Zell chose that moment to wander over and frowned at Squall's comment. "I don't hear anything."

Squall just glowered at him and headed toward the alley. I pushed Zell ahead of me and followed after Squall. Just as we crouched down, several Galbadian soldiers trotted into the square, then headed down the road across from us. When they were gone, I stepped out of the alley and moved closer to the road until I could see where the soldiers were going.

"What's up there?" Zell asked.

"The communications tower." Squall answered.

"Why would they go there?"

"Does it matter?" I asked, grinning widely. "We obviously can't let them get there and do whatever they want to it."

Zell frowned at me. "But we're supposed to stay here."

"Do what you want." Squall said, hefting Lion Heart onto his shoulder. "I'm going."

I stuck my arm out to stop him. "I'm the leader. _I_ make that decision."

Squall looked up at me through his bangs. He didn't say anything, but I could see it in his eyes. He was going to go, whether I made the call or not. He was jeopardizing his SeeD promotion! Why? So I pulled him aside and told Zell to stay put for a second. "Squall, what the hell is going on with you? You _do_ realize your insubordination will cost you the exam?"

"You know the same thing will happen if _you_ make the decision." Squall snapped back. "You might still get blamed anyway. At least if I take the initiative, maybe you won't catch so much flak."

I gaped at him. "Are you trying to protect me?"

"..."

"What is _wrong_ with you?"

He didn't answer me. He shook my hand off and started for the road. Having no choice, really, because I wasn't going to pass up watching this new Squall in action, I followed him. Zell came at our heels, complaining, loudly, that we were disobeying orders and we were going to get into so much trouble.

And, you know what?

I didn't care.


	3. Chapter 3

Three - Squall POV

It's the understatement of the day that I'm letting my emotions get the better of me. I came to the decision that I couldn't let anyone know that I knew what was going to happen before it happened, mostly because no one would understand. According to how my past self acted, I'd already reached my word quota for the next three months. Seifer was constantly watching me now, and because I had his attention, I could see the qualities that would, if he could keep his temper and ego out of it, make him an excellent leader. He was smart. He could assess a situation with one sweep of his eyes and see the best path to take with the lowest loss of life and limb. He also knew I was up to something.

I guess if I thought he wouldn't laugh, I would've told him. But even in my own mind, telling him that he was going to become the servant of an evil sorceress, kill hundreds of people, and then meet his end by my hand, sounded like I was having a mental break. I couldn't tell him. I couldn't tell anyone. I had to let it play out as it would, making only the slightest changes to my decisions and actions here and there. I had to change _me_ , _my_ path, not anyone else's.

Except Seifer's.

He was always the damn exception.

We headed up to the communications tower as quickly as we could, even under constant attack by the Galbadian soldiers. When we reached the area where the Dollet soldier jumped out of the bushes, I pushed past Seifer and Zell and engaged the Anacondaur myself. It was mostly to let off some aggression, as well as let Seifer assess the new me. It was about the only thing I could do to keep him interested and satisfied that he was right: there was something wrong with me.

Zell whistled lowly when I sheathed Lion Heart by my side and gave me a long look. "If you could fight like that, why didn't you whoop Seifer's ass earlier?"

"Because he doesn't like to show off, chicken-wuss." Seifer replied for me. He gave me a look that dared to me to refute his words, and we both ignored Zell's complaining. I didn't bother to even think about it. I just moved past them and headed further up the trail. Seifer followed after me, and Zell came trotting after him looking dejected.

When we reached the top of the cliff, I automatically crouched. Seifer and Zell followed my lead, getting as low as they could to avoid being seen by the Galbadian soldiers below us. As soon as they had all entered the communications tower, I got to my feet and began heading down. I knew Selphie was going to show up soon, and the idiot would jump the cliff in order to get ahead of us and catch Seifer when he went down there. I figured if we were already there, maybe she wouldn't be so stupid.

But then, I'd been wrong before.

"Where are you going?" Zell asked, reaching out to stop me. I deftly avoided his grip and gave him a long, cold look. He paled a little and took a step back.

Seifer laughed and pointed down to the tower's doors. "The Ice Prince wants to see what the bad guys are doing. Isn't that reason enough?"

Zell frowned. "We're going to get into so much trouble, if we haven't already! We're not supposed to be up here!"

"Do what you want." I said, already moving. Seifer was quick to follow.

The moment we were alone - though not for long, I was sure - Seifer asked, "Why _do_ you want to get into the tower so badly?"

"I don't."

"Then why bother?"

I just looked at him and slowly raised my eyebrow. He blinked at me, then his lips split into a wide grin. He slowly shook his head, chuckling. "Leonhart, Leonhart, Leonhart. It isn't even my birthday."

"..." I glanced up the hill where Zell still stood, no doubt debating with himself over whether following the two of us was worth losing whatever rank he would get in SeeD.

"I don't know what's gotten into you, Squally-boy, but I like it." Seifer grinned wider.

I just stared at him from under my bangs. It was about all I could do, since I didn't really have a response for him. I took a deep breath, and let it out slowly in a sigh. "Just don't tell me about your romantic dream, and we'll get along just fine."

His grin became more lopsided at that. "You sure? You just might like it."

"I'm pretty sure I won't." I resumed walking, pausing when I reached the small courtyard in front of the communication's tower with Seifer - and Zell - on my heels.

"Heeeey! There you are! I've been looking all over for you!"

We all looked up at Selphie, who stood precariously on the rocks above us. She gave us a little wave, then slowly started down the rocks. She made it safely to the ledge we'd been standing on only a few minutes ago, then hurried to the cliff. I watched her coil herself for her jump, and was already moving forward as she took a flying leap toward the ground. Since I knew that this time around it was far different, I intended to catch her this time. If she tripped on the small rise above here and tumbled down, what would happen to her now that I'd changed that? I didn't want her to end up breaking her leg or something worse when she landed down here.

It was almost flawless.

I managed to snake my arms around her waist as she reached me. Being the smart girl she was, Selphie had already figured out my intentions and had drawn her legs up and back away from me. She kept her arms out to her sides until I was able to touch her, and then she brought her arms around my shoulders. It would've been perfect, except she had been going too fast. We collided together hard enough to force the breath out of me, and then we collapsed to the ground, her on top of me.

Seifer burst out laughing. "Graceful, princess!"

"Oh my gosh! Are you alright?" Selphie was at least kind enough to jump off me and help me to my feet. My only response was to nod. "Oh! Good!" Then she focused on Seifer. "Hey! Are you the leader of Squad B?"

Seifer managed to stop laughing long enough to answer her. "Yeah, I am. Who are you, girl?"

"My name's Selphie, not 'girl'! I have new orders. All SeeD members and SeeD candidates are to withdraw at 1900 hours. Assemble at the shore!"

I looked toward Seifer. He seemed deep in thought, a different stance than what he'd done before. Last time, he'd gotten pissed off at the withdraw order, wanting to stay and kill our enemies. This time, he actually seemed to consider the order. Then he glanced at his watch. "We've got an hour before that time. We could do some considerable damage."

Selphie held up her hands. "I'm just a messenger."

"Remember what Xu said," Zell started. "An order to withdraw takes priority."

Seifer met my gaze, a brow raised. His head tilted toward the tower. I lifted my shoulders in a shrug. I knew what would happen if we went up there. We'd fight Biggs and Wedge, and then Elvoret would show up. We'd kill it and as we made our way back down, Biggs would unleash the X-ATM092 and send it after us. I was confident I could kill it now, with the others providing back up, but that didn't mean I wanted to fight it. There also really wasn't any reason for us to go up there; I could hear Siren whispering to me that she was with me, and the only reason we went up there the first time was to go after Seifer.

Who had ended up abandoning us.

"I think we should withdraw," I said at last.

Seifer's lips lifted in a smirk. "But? What's going on in that head of yours, Leonhart?"

Both Zell and Selphie looked at me, their eyes a little wide. I focused on Seifer. "Do you want to go up there?"

Seifer blinked, shocked by the question, apparently. He shrugged. "Is there anything worth going up there for?"

I didn't answer. I only shrugged. I didn't want to give away too much. If we went up there, then Seifer would never make it to SeeD. If we went back, then he might just have a chance, and we would never face the machine that Biggs would send after us. I didn't let my thoughts show on my face, instead staring impassively at Seifer while waiting for him to make his decision.

Selphie and Zell were getting twitchy, unused to standing around waiting. They wouldn't leave on their own, but they also were getting edgy about Seifer's silence. Finally, Seifer gave a soft grunt and turned his back on the tower. "We're going back." he said.

"Are you sure?" Zell asked nervously. "I mean, there are still enemies around."

"You wanna go up there and see what's waiting for us?"

Zell vehemently shook his head.

Seifer pointed back up the hill. "Then let's go. We can at least report back that we saw the Galbadians entering this tower. There's a reason they're here, a reason why they want this tower operational so badly." He looked at me. "Right?"

I shrugged again, then started back up the hill. Selphie hurriedly joined me, and Seifer and Zell brought up the rear. Seifer caught up to me within a few strides and leaned close so that the others wouldn't hear him. "You and I need to have a little talk, Leonhart."

I didn't bother to answer him, but I inclined my head to show him I'd heard him. He gave a brief nod, then passed me, taking the lead. I wasn't surprised when he left us behind, either. That, at least, echoed what he'd done before.


	4. Chapter 4

Four - Seifer POV

When we made it back to Balamb, I was greeted by Fujin and Raijin. The two were relieved to see me all in one piece. I didn't bother to tell them that my good fortune had come in the shape of a stormy-eyed brunette who seemed to know what was going to happen before it happened. I was certain Squall didn't know half of the tells he had, otherwise he'd be harder for me to read than he was already.

He'd lied to me about the communications tower.

When I'd asked him if there was anything worth it up there, he'd said nothing, giving the barest of non-verbal 'whatever's he could. Yet his eyes hadn't left mine. Squall is a terrible liar, but I'd never called him on it. Since Selphie and Zell hadn't argued too much, I'd let the matter drop and let the Ice Prince take the lead. I'd meant it when I told him we were going to talk. Now it was just a matter of finding the time to do so.

I put on the show of bravado for my friends' benefit, and I didn't miss the way Squall's blue-grey eyes slightly narrowed when I mentioned being a leader and how hard it was.

"Seifer," Fujin said lowly, "are you all right?"

I looked at the silver haired woman and nodded. "Yeah, I'm all right. Things just got a little strange, that's all."

Her crimson gaze traveled to Squall, and her lips pursed for a moment before she relaxed and resumed her normal stoic expression. She looked back at me. "Is _he_ all right?"

My eyebrows shot up to my hairline. I knew Fujin was an observant girl, but I hadn't expected her to pick up on the change in Squall so quickly. "What do you mean? He's the same old Squall he's always been."

"Liar."

"Hey, Seifer," Raijin draped an arm about Fujin's shoulders and leaned on her as he grinned at me, "there's a car waitin'. Let's go back. I'm gettin' hungry."

Fujin rolled her eye and shoved Raijin off her before she focused on me once more. "He's different. He carries himself differently."

"Hey, when I know, you'll know." I motioned toward the car Raijin had indicated and headed that way. We got in, and it was without regret that I drove off, leaving behind Squall and the other two. I glanced into the rearview mirror and watched Zell chase us halfway before giving up. Squall's eyes never left mine, even though I was sure he couldn't see me.

We didn't remain separated for long.

I was waiting for him back at the Garden, watching him stop and talk to Quistis, Xu, and Headmaster Cid. Squall did nothing but listen to what was being said, but he didn't seem surprised by the news. Since I'd arrived back here before him, I'd already heard the news. It had shocked me that all of our effort at getting to the tower had been worth absolutely nothing, since apparently the SeeD didn't even know Galbadia had been after the communication tower. It also pissed me off because our effort to free Dollet from Galbadia's occupation had been worthless, as well. Galbadia had agreed to leave Dollet alone, so long as the tower remained operational and stayed in good repair.

"Seifer." Squall had approached me while I was lost in thought. He stood at an arm's length distance from me, careful not to intrude on my personal space. His use of my name had been to warn me he was there, because he'd known I hadn't sensed his presence.

"Hey. I take it you heard about the tower?" I asked because it looked like he expected the question. When he only inclined his head, I bulled ahead. "But you already knew about it, didn't you? You purposely forced my hand and then stopped us from going further once we got there."

Squall was silent for a long while, watching my face. I could almost tell what he was thinking; he was debating something with himself, something he wasn't sure he could talk to me about. I'd learned early on to speak Leonhart - he didn't talk much, but his body tended to give away what he was thinking - so I knew it was only a matter of time before he made a choice.

Then he tensed. Quickly he said, "Whatever happens between now and the party, you figure out a way to get out of it. Meet me at the training center ten minutes before midnight."

Before I could ask him what he meant, Quistis and Xu approached us. Maybe it was Squall's message that made what the two of them said that much easier to bear. I was going to be taking the responsibility of leaving the courtyard, despite Squall's attempt to take the blame. I didn't say anything about that, which shocked Quistis. She had been expecting me to say something arrogant, or maybe even fight the accusation. And there was still that pang of hurt when Xu told me I would never become a SeeD. After they left, the Headmaster approached us, but his words didn't make me feel any better.

I noticed that Squall hadn't left the immediate area. He was still standing nearby, with his back half turned to me. I knew he'd been listening, because his fists were clenched tight by his sides. I recognized the emotion of anger in him; coupled with what he'd asked of me earlier, it only piqued my interest more.

What was it he wanted to talk about? What was it he knew that the rest of us didn't? Why was he acting so strangely?

I was going to find out. Ten minutes before midnight, I had to somehow get to the training center. I wasn't going to let Leonhart go until I had all the answers I wanted.

Until then...

I wasn't surprised that Squall, Zell, and Selphie achieved the promotion to SeeD. Despite Squall's obvious disregard for the orders given to our squad, he had still acquitted himself well. There was an odd glint in his blue-grey eyes as he saw me standing in the hall clapping for him. I only smiled at him, giving my own non-verbal agreement to our meeting. His head tilted slightly to one side, and his eyes flicked down the hallway past Quistis' classroom. His entire demeanor changed then, his body tensing and his expression becoming unreadable. I wondered what he was thinking about to make him react that way. I filed it away for later, intending to get my answers from Squall one way or another.

I spent my afternoon locked in a room being lectured about the qualities of a good leader. I barely paid attention to what was being said, instead focusing on what I knew about Squall and what Fujin had observed about him over the past few hours. I trusted her powers of observation better than I did my own sometimes. I tended to focus too much on one aspect; she was able to see and study everything. By the time I was released from my obligatory penance, I was already running late for my first appointment of the night. I made sure I looked presentable, then headed down to the front gate of the school. I prided myself on keeping my promises, and I owed her at least this much.

"Seifer!"

Rinoa was dressed up for the occasion. I waved at her as I approached, taking my time to look her up and down. She wore a yellow dress that accented her olive skin and dark hair and made her look the part of a princess. She was grinning brightly at me, looking ready to burst from excitement. I'd promised her I'd introduce her to Headmaster Cid, so she could pitch him the idea of getting SeeD to help her and her little group in Timber. I didn't think he'd go for it, but I hadn't told her that.

"Hey, princess." I almost choked on the words as she caught me in a rough hug. I'd been seeing her for some time now, but after tasting the forbidden fruit, she'd revealed that she wasn't the ditzy freedom fighting princess that she pretended to be. It had been enough for me to decide it wasn't worth my effort, but she hadn't let me go until she'd wrangled this promise from me. At least it was just a promise... "So, you ready for this?"

"Of course!" She beamed up at me once she let me go, holding up both her fists in her best 'I'm game!' pose. "I'm going to convince Headmaster Cid to help us! Price isn't an issue for freedom!"

I laughed because I couldn't help myself. "Come on then. We have a party to get to."

She hooked her arm in mine and I escorted her into the school and to the ballroom. I could hear the music before we even reached the room, and it was even louder inside. I left Rinoa to her own devices as I went to find the Headmaster, intending to convince him to see her. As I wandered around the ballroom looking for Cid, I realized that, out of all the SeeD that were here, Squall wasn't. No one seemed to notice that he wasn't around, but as I passed by Selphie, I overheard her saying to Zell, "...waiting for him, but he didn't show up! Then I realized that he'd already been and gone! I wonder where Squall went... this party is for us! We're supposed to be having fun! ...And I wanted to ask him about joining the Garden Festival committee..."

I frowned. It wasn't like Squall to skip obligatory functions. He was a stickler for the rules, followed every last order to the letter. It only reinforced the fact that he was acting different than before.

I spotted Quistis and managed to avoid her sight somehow. She looked like she was looking for Squall too, and seemed disappointed that she couldn't find him. I finally found Cid, and he was only too happy to agree to see Rinoa. As soon as I collected the princess and delivered her to her appointment, I slipped out of the ballroom and headed for the training center. I was five minutes early, and he was already standing there, leaning against the wall, waiting for me.


	5. Chapter 5

Five - Squall POV

He was early.

That meant he must've rushed through introducing Rinoa to Cid. I'd avoided going to the dance on purpose. I felt a little bad about not being there for Selphie when she came around asking for volunteers for her festival committee, but I hadn't wanted to see Rinoa. I knew why she was here. I knew that, tomorrow, I'd be on my way to Timber to help her try and assassinate the president of Galbadia. Cid was only trying to save Edea, and he was trying to protect us from learning the truth too soon. We'd end up learning it anyway, along with the fact that the GF's stole memories to make room for themselves in our minds, and that's why we forgot our childhood. Why I forgot Ellone... and other things.

...I'd wanted a little bit of time to figure out how to deal with her, knowing what I did about her future. Could I stop her from becoming a sorceress? Could I protect her from what we'd end up facing? I didn't know... and I still couldn't figure anything out.

Since I'd avoided going to the dance, I'd also avoided interacting with Quistis. I knew she'd be looking for me, wanting to spend a little time with me before she told me that she was no longer an instructor. The Garden staff had told her she'd failed in her job, that she lacked leadership qualities. They weren't wrong - Quistis did better when she was told what to do and then left to her own devices to accomplish it. I knew that first hand. So as soon as I'd left the Headmaster's office, after Seifer's applause, I'd returned to my room and changed clothes, then came here to the training center.

I had time to kill while waiting for Seifer. I'd wandered around, but the monsters avoided me. They could smell the predator in me, and knew I was much stronger than I looked. I'd even taken the time to talk to Shiva, Bahamut, and the other Guardian Forces; they'd agreed to stay un-junctioned to me for the time being, but they would answer my call if I needed them. I could feel their ghostly presences just at the edge of my consciousness, ready and waiting, but not attached to me. That was, at least, one thing I could say was going right for me so far.

After I'd finished wandering about - I'd already decided I was going to make sure I met Ellone this time, and I was going to say a few things to her and the White SeeD protecting her - I'd returned to the hall leading into the training center to wait for Seifer.

"They missed you at the festivities." Seifer said as he approached me.

I shrugged. "I don't like to dance."

"Not formal ones, anyway, but you've never said no to me."

"That's different."

Seifer smirked, but the expression was gone in the next heartbeat. "Cid told me you tried to get me promoted."

I sighed softly. I should've figured Cid wouldn't haven't kept his mouth shut. He'd seemed ecstatic that Seifer and I were "getting along so well", as he put it, when I'd spoken to him about possibly taking another look at Seifer's conduct during the SeeD exam. I guess Seifer just wasn't meant to be a SeeD. Didn't mean he _had_ to be a sorceress' knight, though.

"You know you risked your promotion by doing that." Seifer continued, moving closer to me. "Do I seem like a weak person who needs protection and coddling, Leonhart?"

"Follow me." I didn't want to answer his question. It reminded me too much of what he had become, of what he had been right before Lion Heart had... I forced the thought away. It had taken too much time to convince myself this was the right thing to do, even though I was certain he was going to die laughing. He hesitated, then started after me with heavy, deliberate steps. I had his attention, and it wasn't likely I wasn't going to lose it any time soon.

We entered the training center's foyer and I led the way into the center proper. I didn't look back at him, even when I heard him grumbling about being led by the hand like a child. Despite myself, my lips twitched into a small smirk. Seifer seemed to have an issue with being treated like a little kid; maybe that issue was what had allowed Edea to turn him. I pushed the thought aside. Now wasn't the time to think about what had been. I was going to tell him in order to change what would be.

"Hyne, not even one damn monster." Seifer said loudly. I felt the wind from Hyperion as he swung the gunblade in his agitation, but I didn't turn around. "What'd you do, Leonhart? Scare all of them off?"

"...Maybe."

His footsteps stopped suddenly. I paused and twisted slightly to look back at him. He was watching me with an unreadable gaze, his emerald eyes focused on my face. "Shit, you're not lying, are you?"

"When have I ever lied to you?"

Seifer tilted his head slightly, as if conceding the point. I watched him for a moment longer, then inclined my head and started once again for the secret area. After a slight hesitation, he followed me again. He said nothing, but I could tell he was bursting with questions. If I didn't appease him soon, I was sure he would find his own answers, and I wasn't entirely sure what I'd do then. I felt Shiva at the edge of my consciousness, felt her say, _If he chooses to bring harm to you, then we shall react accordingly, as we've always done._ I subtlety shook my head to try and deter her, but the GFs knew what I did: that Seifer had become the sorceress' knight and had killed hundreds of people, people that had utilized the GFs just like I had. People the GFs had come to care for.

When we reached the secret area, the couples that were there quickly left at the sight of Seifer. Apparently, the Disciplinary Committee was holding up and enforcing the curfew rules. Huh. Who knew?

I reached the ledge and leaned against it, studying the glowing Garden ahead of us. Seifer stood still behind me for a minute, then joined me at the wall. Alone like this, I became increasingly aware of him - of his height, his heat, his strength, his presence - and I became even more sure of my decision.

"All right, Squall," Seifer said, after a handful of minutes had passed in silence. "What was it you wanted me here for?"

I turned to face him. Seifer's green eyes were still serious, and his face was completely devoid of expression. I wasn't sure what he thought I was going to tell him, but it sure as hell wasn't what he expected. So I started with, "Tomorrow, I'm going to get my first SeeD mission. I'll be going to Timber to help Rinoa-"

"You know Rinoa?"

I ignored the shock in his voice (and maybe there was the sound of jealousy too) and continued. "To help Rinoa kill the Galbadian President. Except we'll fail. We'll fail, and when we try to reach the television station, you'll try and kill the president, only to be taken by the sorceress whom the president is relinquishing all control to." I continued talking. I told him everything, how Galbadia Garden used us to try and kill Edea, how Seifer had chosen to become her knight and how we fought, how the entire story played out. I didn't leave out a single detail, and even I heard my voice choke when I started to describe how I'd killed him in the end. What I didn't tell him was that Edea was actually our Matron, the woman who'd cared for us during our early, and forgotten, childhood. I couldn't bring myself to reveal that detail at this moment. I didn't think it would help my cause, anyway.

When I finished, I waited for his reaction.

It was about what I expected. Seifer burst out laughing, clutching to the railing to keep himself upright. "I guess I rattled that head of yours harder than I thought! The hell is all this bullshit? I bet you heard Rinoa's name through Fujin or Raijin, right?" He burst out laughing again.

"..." I sighed. I lashed out faster than he could react and grabbed him by his collar. I spun us to slam his back against the wall. He grunted and reached up to grab my hands, presumably to pull me off him, but then he froze. I knew why. Bahamut had materialized behind me, his great wings spread to cover us in darkness. His maw opened to reveal sharp teeth and I felt the breeze of his hiss across my back. I released Seifer with one hand so I could hold it up to stave off the dragon's wrath. "Use scan if you don't believe me." I said quietly. "Or I could let him eat you. Which would you believe more?"

"Wh-what the hell kind of GF is that?!" Seifer hissed, his eyes wide as he stared at Bahamut. "H-how the hell can you control it?!"

I released Seifer then and stepped back. Bahamut closed his wings and lowered his head to my hand, nuzzling my palm like he was a lap dog. My eyes never left Seifer's. "His name is Bahamut. We have an understanding."

 _More or less,_ Bahamut chuckled, his tail flicking from side to side.

"If I _do_ cast scan on you," Seifer started warily, "he's not going to, you know..."

"Eat you?"

"Yeah."

 _Bahamut._ I said gently. The great dragon made a low rumbling sound before vanishing from sight. I knew he hadn't gone far - I could feel him once more at the edge of my consciousness - but at least he would now have to answer my call if he wanted to come onto this plane.

As soon as he was gone, I felt the familiar tingle of scan magic. I kept my eyes on Seifer as he got his readings back. His eyes nearly popped out of his head and his mouth dropped open in shock. He pointed at me, but he was unable to form any words.

So I asked, "When have I ever lied to you?"

His mouth closed. His eyes still held shock but they weren't wide open anymore. He approached me quickly, but I held my ground. His fingers brushed my neck, then hooked in the collar of my shirt and pulled it down to reveal my right shoulder. The scar from the icicle was still there, no longer red and raw, but still fresh. "Holy shit." Seifer breathed. "What the fuck..."

I shrugged away from his touch and pulled my shirt back into place. I didn't know what to do now. It was all in Seifer's hands.

Seifer cursed again, then brushed past me and left the secret place.

I sighed. I supposed as far as reactions went, this one was neither good nor bad. I followed him, keeping a few steps behind so he couldn't take a swing at me but allow him to know I was still there. Recognizing the tenseness in his body, I put more and more distance between us until the monsters got over their fear of me and began to attack him. I didn't help him in his battles; he wouldn't have appreciated it and it might've made my current standing with him even worse. At least he seemed to tire himself out, and he collapsed on a fallen log, staring at Hyperion. I slowly approached him, keeping out of striking range when I finally stopped moving. He glanced up, recognized the distance, then surprisingly, grimaced.

"So all of what you said, that beauty of a gunblade of yours, how you seemed to know what was going to happen in Dollet..." Seifer rubbed his face with his hands. "It's all true? And you lived it already?"

I nodded.

He smirked. "Back to the silent treatment already?"

I glowered at him.

"Easy, Ice Princess, I'm just..." he blew out a sigh and rose. "If I didn't know you better, I'd say all of this was bullshit, but there's too much evidence to the contrary. Lion Heart, your scars, your knowledge... who else knows?"

"Besides me? Just you, now." I replied quietly.

Seifer nodded. "So you came back to save me?"

"Yes."

"Why?"

I blinked, startled. I hadn't considered 'why'. I just knew it was something I had to do. I didn't want Seifer to end up like he did. I didn't want to kill him again. As I studied his face, I knew that all of these reasons, all of these excuses, would just put distance between us again. Seifer didn't want to be coddled, treated as weak. He wanted to be treated as an equal. He also wouldn't accept my selfish reason. I couldn't force him, that much I realized. I had to get him to follow me on his own, to realize on his own that this was the best path.

I also realized then that I didn't have a satisfactory answer that would get us what we both wanted.

 _You know the answer,_ Siren whispered to me. _Look inside yourself, and say it._

I looked at my feet, closed my eyes tight, and clenched my fists. "Because," I started, hating the way my own voice sounded thick, like I was about to cry, "because I don't want to lose you."

I felt his presence and knew immediately that I was in his shadow. I opened my eyes and raised my head, meeting his gaze evenly. Seifer was watching me back, his emerald eyes seeming somehow darker. He didn't touch me and I didn't touch him. We just stared at each other. I don't know what he saw in my eyes, or on my face, but eventually he stepped back and hefted Hyperion onto his shoulder.

"Fine," he said, smirking. "We'll do this your way. I'm guessing you're going to get permission for a non-SeeD to join you?"

For a second, I couldn't believe what I was hearing. Despite myself, I felt my lips twitch into a small smile. I nodded slowly. "Or, you know, you could just show up." I said quietly, knowing that he'd somehow have to escape being corralled into confinement.

"Yeah, I could do that, too." He swung Hyperion off his shoulder and pointed toward the training center's exit. "Let's get out of here, then. I don't want any more surprises. I'm already reeling because of this. Holy Hyne, Squall, you sure you're doing the right thing, changing events like this?"

Since he walked away before I could answer, I assumed he didn't want one. But he had voiced the one thing I'd been asking myself since waking up in the past. I knew I'd already changed one event by convincing Seifer I wasn't crazy and convincing him to follow my lead. Now I had to see it through to the end.

We were almost back when I heard a woman's scream. I recognized it immediately and without thought rushed forward. Seifer was right behind me, catching up to me as soon as I reached Ellone.

"Shit, Squall, we're going to have to have a talk about you doing-" Seifer cut himself off as the Granaldo enemy swooped down on us. His lips split into a big grin and he hefted Hyperion into stance. I glanced at him, then drew Lion Heart and fell into stance as well.

"Squall! Squall!" Ellone cried. "Seifer?"

I couldn't help my own smirk at the surprise in her voice. Seifer and I had never really gotten along in the orphanage, and we rarely did now, but we had never been fully enemies. Neither had we really been friends. We respected each other. Between the two of us, the bug and its friends didn't last long. I knew I didn't have much time between the monsters' defeat and the appearance of the White SeeDs, so I quickly crossed to Ellone and grabbed her hand.

"Sis," I said, seeing her eyes widen in shock, "Sis, listen to me. I can't explain everything right now, but I need you to do me a favor. You need to stay safe, okay? I need you to go to Esthar right now and you need to _stay there_ until I come get you. Understand?"

"S-Squall, what are you talking about?" Ellone's voice was small, almost panicked. She didn't understand; I didn't have the time to explain it to her.

I squeezed her hand tighter. "Sis, please. Just this once, do as I ask. And... and when you see Laguna... when you see Dad..." I saw the shadows of the White SeeD now. Not enough time. "Tell Dad I love him, all right?"

Ellone's eyes were still wide but she gave the barest of nods. Just as the White SeeD jumped down to her rescue, she clutched my hand. "I'll tell him. I promise."

I nodded and released her. The White SeeD quickly took Ellone under their care and led her from the training center. When they were gone, Seifer finally approached me and asked, "She the one who sends people into the past?"

I kept my face carefully neutral. I'd left out all the details about us knowing each other in our forgotten childhood and I'd left out that Ellone had been like a big sister to us all... especially to me, since I'd been born with her right there. "Yeah," I said at last. "She's the one."

"I don't know how you do it, Squall." Seifer said, leaving his meaning ambiguous as he walked out of the training center. After a minute, I followed him.

I headed to the dorms, avoiding Zell since I knew he would be waiting in the hall to inform me we now had our own private rooms. When I reached my room, I made sure to lock the door behind me before I collapsed onto my bed.


	6. Chapter 6

Six - Seifer POV

I'd stayed up practically the whole night thinking about what Squall had told me. Had I not known the Ice Prince the way I did, I would've thought he'd gone crazy and I'd have laughed him right out of the secret place. I would've probably still been laughing even as Quistis came to collect me for my punishment. But I knew Squall too well. He had never lied to me before. I don't think he knew how to lie. More than paying attention to his words, I'd paid attention to his body language. For all the silence he cloaks himself in, I'm surprised he's never realized how much his body speaks for him. As he'd progressed through the story, his body had tensed and relaxed and had made other minute movements that I doubted Squall knew he made. They were all genuine movements, all genuine reactions to anger, sadness, fear, joy.

...I realized then that I'd never seen Squall truly happy.

I knew he'd left out plenty of details, but I was sure, if we were going to be re-living his past, living our present and future, those little details would be filled in. I'd trusted him before; I had to trust him now. I also intended to prod him about his relationship with Rinoa. When he'd talked about her becoming a sorceress, his voice had hitched a little bit. I could tell he knew that Rinoa and I had dated for a little bit last year. What he didn't know was that I'd called it off before it got too serious. I'd learned (quickly) that Rinoa wasn't the dolt she portrayed herself to be. After getting what I'd wanted from her, she'd backed me into a corner and gotten my promise to take her to see Cid. She could be shrewd when she wanted to be, and knew how to play the game, even if the people who followed her were complete morons.

 _Time to get moving,_ I told myself. I got out of bed and showered, dressing with care. I still wore my standard white coat, blue cross shirt, dark pants, and combat boots, but I made sure I had a presentable image. While I wasn't a SeeD, I'd be traveling with them, and I needed to look the part in case anyone outside of Squall questioned my presence.

I dodged Quistis and the Garden staff with her and headed down the private SeeD dorms. I doubted even Squall would be up this early. I'd purposefully chosen to get up now to keep Raijin and Fujin from following me. I felt bad about leaving them behind without telling them why, but I wanted to protect them. I chuckled to myself, but it had a bitter tone to it. Wasn't I doing exactly what Squall was? I shook my head and pushed it to the back of my mind to deal with later.

As I reached the private dorms, I could hear Selphie yelling, "Squall, it's our first SeeD mission! Looks like we're going to Timber. Meet by the front gate. Hurry!"

I ducked behind a pillar as Selphie skipped by, dressed in a garish yellow sundress. I shook my head and moved to stand before Squall's door. I knocked once to be polite, then tried to enter. My face nearly collided with the door.

"Squall, did you lock your door?" I growled, banging my fist on the portal.

It slid open, revealing the Ice Prince. Squall stared up at me with his stormy blue-grey eyes, framed by those unruly locks of brown hair. He was dressed in his usual black, white fur, and belts. Lion Heart was carefully sheathed by his side. If I didn't know any better, I would've described his expression as pleasantly shocked.

Then he said, "People have a tendency to let themselves in."

He didn't say any more. He didn't have to. I'd seen the scar left by the icicle, so I knew what kind of reaction people would have if they walked in on him and realized future-Squall had taken the place of the Squall they thought they knew.

He brushed by me and hesitated, a silent command for me to follow him. I did, smirking the whole while. I caught the stares of students as we walked by them, each of their faces filled with shock. I had to wonder then, what kind of damage could Squall and I do together? According to him, we'd wrought incredible destruction fighting each other, but what if we fought alongside each other? I was about to find out.

When we reached the front gate, I could see Selphie, Cid, and a Garden faculty member. The latter seemed impatient, tapping his foot as he continuously stared at his watch. Selphie gaped when she saw me following Squall, and the headmaster seemed to be completely flabbergasted. He quickly approached us, huff-puffing as fast as he could to stop us before we reached the rest of the team.

"Squall, what is the meaning of this?" Cid asked, looking from me to Squall and back again. "You know he's supposed to be in detention."

"I know."

"Then why is he here?"

"Because I need him."

"What?"

I glanced at Squall, noticing how his face became stone still as he regarded Cid. Squall inclined his head a little, and I saw in him the Commander Leonhart he'd told me he'd become. "Seifer is the most knowledgeable about Timber. It would be foolish of me not to take such a valuable asset. Besides that, I know that he introduced you to the girl whose request you accepted."

Leave it to Squall to hamstring someone with words rather than a weapon. Cid looked somewhere between incredibly scared and impressed. Cid glanced to me, frowning. "And you, Seifer? This goes against all Garden rules and regulations to allow a non-SeeD on a SeeD mission. You must obey your leader at all times, and complete the mission by whatever means available. Based on your previous records-"

I cut him off with a wave. "Based on my previous records, I'm not worth shit as a SeeD. But I can follow orders. I can complete the mission. If I couldn't, Squall wouldn't be bringing me."

Squall glanced at me, about the only break in his emotionless facade. I was lying out of my ass, and we both knew it. The real reason I was coming along was so that Squall could keep an eye on me and I could be happy about it. He knew I wouldn't have been able to stay in that confinement room, or even to stay behind at Garden. I would've followed. I would be reckless. I would put everything Squall was working to save in danger.

Cid still didn't look convinced. He turned to regard Squall again. "Squall, this is completely unprecedented."

"Headmaster, trust me when I say I need the best. And despite records, Seifer _is_ the best."

I carefully kept myself from reacting. A compliment from Squall was like water in the desert. It didn't happen often.

"I will take full responsibility for him, Headmaster." Squall continued. "He can only be an asset to this mission."

Whatever answer Cid was going to give was drowned out as a humming noise filled the air. I glanced toward the Garden and watched with wry amusement as Zell leaped over them on a T-board, quickly racing toward us. He stopped short when he saw me, his mouth falling open in shock.

"T-Boards are prohibited within Garden." snapped the Garden faculty member. "Have you forgotten?"

Zell tore his gaze away from me and stared at the robed man. "Oops, sorry! But this is really cool. It may come in handy on a SeeD mission someday. And what is _he_ doing here?" Zell pointed right at me, alerting the Garden staff member to my presence at last.

Before the Garden staff could order me to be arrested, Squall stepped forward and grabbed Zell's T-Board. " _He_ is here because I want him to be."

"What? Hey! Give that back!" Zell reached for his board, but the Garden staff member grabbed it from Squall's hands and pulled it close to him, stopping Zell's grab.

"Confiscate this." growled the staff. He handed it to another robed Garden faculty member, and I waved bye-bye to the T-Board just to see Zell's glower of absolute hatred toward me. Then the Garden faculty member turned to me and said, "You are not supposed to be here. You are not a SeeD."

Squall's expression became dark. I doubted he'd expected it to be this difficult to get my ass on his team. I kept my mouth shut, though, which seemed to startle everyone but Squall. The Ice Prince stepped forward, and for a minute I thought Bahamut was going to make another appearance. Instead, Squall saluted the Faculty member and said, "He may not be a SeeD, but I feel he would benefit from seeing SeeDs in action and working closely with them. If you're uncertain about my ability to control him, then please say so."

 _So I can tell you to fuck off._ Was left unspoken. Heard, if I could read the Garden faculty's expression correctly, but unspoken.

"I don't see a problem with it." Cid said, clasping his hands behind his back. "It's a sound plan, if you think carefully about it."

I held in my laugh. Of course it was a sound plan! It got me out of Garden, so that these idiots wouldn't have to babysit me, and it kept me in good hands. The Garden faculty seemed about to argue, but after a minute, relented, and waved his hand in dismissal.

"As you wish."

Cid approached all of us then. "Well, about your first mission... You are to go to Timber. There, you will be supporting a resistance faction. That is your mission. A member of the faction will contact you at Timber Station."

"This person will talk to you and say, 'The forests of Timber sure have changed'." the Garden faculty member growled. "At this time, you must reply 'But the owls are still around'. That is the password."

Cid smiled kindly. "Just follow the faction's orders."

Zell glanced between all of us, and swallowed hard. "Uh... Just us three? And him?"

"Correct. We have agreed to do this mission for very little money. Normally, we would never accept such requests, but..." the Garden faculty member trailed off. I noticed Squall was glaring at him.

Cid shook his head. "Enough talk about that. Well then, Squall, you are the squad leader. Use your best judgment based on the situation. Zell, Selphie, and Seifer, you are to support Squall and give your all to carry out the faction's plans."

Just like that, we were dismissed. I waited until Zell and Selphie had headed out of the gate before asking Squall, "You were acting like the leader before he even gave you the position."

"I was being assertive." Squall said, but he sounded uncertain.

"You're really serious about protecting me, aren't you?"

He looked up at me, his expression unreadable. He looked away then and said, "I'm not sure who I'm protecting anymore."

I blinked, confused. "Squall?"

"Is it me? Or is it you? Is it the both of us?" Squall answered my question with a question, returning my gaze for a minute. "You said something that made me think last night, and now, beyond knowing I don't want to lose you again, I'm not sure if I'm protecting you or me."

Since he walked away without waiting for me to answer, or make a witty comeback, I figured it was his silent way of telling me to let him talk and not make a big deal out of it. Only I couldn't help but make a big deal out of it. The problem was, I'd made my promise to see this out to the end, whatever may come, and Squall was the only one who really knew what was going to happen.

I followed, watching Squall's back the entire time.

We entered Balamb and headed to the train station. Squall really wasn't wasting any time. Once we were on board, he moved to the console and opened the door with the ticket before Selphie headed toward the door. I watched her face light up as the door opened for her, and she headed into the hall beyond, grinning widely. Zell gave me one last glare before following her. That left Squall and me alone. It was starting to become a routine neither of us seemed to be very pleased with.

"Come on." I said, leading the way into the next car. "I want to get the better seat."

Squall said nothing, but he was right behind me. We entered the private cabin for SeeD, closely followed by Zell and Selphie. I let out a soft whistle and looked at Squall. "Pays to be a SeeD, doesn't it?"

"Don't get used to it." Squall replied, his voice low.

I turned to find him already settled on the couch, his head back against the cushion and his eyes closed, as if he were about to take a nap. I was about to question him when Selphie began to sway.

"I'm not... feeling well..." she whimpered.

I raised a brow. "You should get some rest if you're tired."

She looked at me with that sleepy-kitten expression, as if she couldn't comprehend that I'd just been nice to her. Then she smiled. "I'm really sleepy..."

"You okay?" Zell asked. It wasn't lost on me that Squall had been eerily silent throughout this whole exchange. Selphie moved to the couch and curled up there, giving a wide yawn. A second later, the hyperactive chatterbox was passing out as well, collapsing on the couch.

The room got too quiet.

There was nothing else I could do except watch everyone sleep. I sat on the couch beside Squall, telling myself it was because I didn't want to keep standing, and telling myself I didn't want to get anywhere near the Chicken-wuss and Ms. Sunshine-All-The-Time. I almost believed myself too. I sat back against the cushion and took the opportunity to study Squall. Now that I looked closely, I could see the subtle differences of this Squall versus the Squall I'd given that scar to a day or so ago. There were dark circles under Squall's eyes, proving that he hadn't slept. There was a tenseness to his body even in sleep that told me he found it hard to relax. And his words kept playing over and over in my head, combining with the story he'd told me and my own dreams and desires.

I couldn't remember my childhood, but I knew it hadn't been a good one. I hadn't made friends easily. The ones I had didn't stick around. Mostly it was my fault, but I always blamed them because I couldn't handle being the one to drive them away. It was after I'd been shipped off to Garden that I'd seen the old show on television, about the honorable knight protecting the princess. That knight became my idol. He was strong and kind, charismatic and cool. He could do no wrong. Living a life like that, that was my romantic dream. I wanted to be someone's knight. I trained hard to become what I thought a knight needed to be. Always afterward, I'd realize I'd let my temper and ego get the better of me in a situation I believed firmly I had to prove myself in. Just like when I'd fought Squall and gave him his scar. I really wasn't sure what I'd been trying to do then. I sure as hell wasn't trying to kill him, but I could see how much better he'd gotten. Better, because of me. Because of all the hours we'd trained together. He was everything I couldn't be and I was...

Jealous.

The train rocked suddenly and Squall slid from his position into my lap. I froze, expecting him to wake up at a minute, but he didn't move.

I relaxed and allowed myself to study him more. I remembered the day I saw him for the first time, in our weapons class. He was so small, so pale, so frail, and utterly silent. And then, to everyone's surprise, he'd picked the gunblade to learn. Just like me. I wondered for the first time, if I hadn't started picking on him, if we could have been friends. If we had worked together from the beginning, would there have been a reason for him to travel all the way back here to change history? I shook my head and blew out a sigh. No use thinking about that now.

One brown lock of hair had slid over his closed eyes. Despite myself, I reached to brush it back and studied his face in sleep.

Hyne, this man was beautiful.

I closed my eyes tight as I thought that. It was no great secret to the world that Squall defied the boundaries of natural beauty. It was one of the reasons that got the crap beat out of him before he'd earned himself the reputation of being my sparring partner. My reputation protected him by default. I made him stronger by sparring with him. He was what I'd - and the world we lived in - forged him to be. I was no different. Maybe after spending so much time with him, I was immune to it, but now that I was able to study him like this, knowing what he was here for, knowing what he was trying to do, for me...

I blew out another sigh. I opened my eyes and stroked his cheek with my gloved thumb.

I liked to think of myself as equal opportunity, even though most of my experience has been with women. There was just something alluring about their soft curves and quiet voices that I liked. But since meeting, dating, and subsequently breaking up with, Rinoa, I hadn't sought out comfort in anyone's arms - instead, I'd turned all my frustration outward, toward everyone in school, even on Fujin and Raijin, until I was able to leash it. Was I upset about the break-up? No. I could answer that one honestly. I wasn't sure why I'd suddenly gotten so angry at the world. Maybe it was because nothing had gone my way. Maybe it was because I could never really hold on to anything I cared about.

But here was my second chance. Well, my first chance. My chance to prove I wasn't what everyone believed me to be. Squall was my chance. When Squall said he didn't want to lose me again, I read between the lines. He may not have thought anything of it, but his body language had expressed more for him than his face or words ever would. But I wanted to be sure. And to be sure, I had to ask him.

Zell began to stir. I leaned back and braced my arms on the back of the couch, making it look like I hadn't felt like moving Squall from his current position. When Zell woke, he glanced around as if he was confused, then looked at me and glowered. As he picked himself up, Selphie was waking up.

The automated voice of the train announced, "Next stop, Timber... Timber... Next stop, Timber... Timber..."

Squall stirred, and he was soon pushing himself up off my lap. He glanced at me in confusion, but I only smirked at him and lifted my shoulders in a shrug. He narrowed his eyes slightly, but it wasn't a malicious glare. It was his confused expression, as if he were trying to divine my thoughts. _You're not gonna get anything out of me, Squally-boy._ I thought. _Not until I want you to know anything._

"I had such a nice dream!" Selphie was saying, her voice holding a dreamy quality.

Squall snorted, about as close to a laugh as he ever got. I raised my brow and looked at him. He shook his head, his way of telling me he'd explain later. I figured it had something to do with the girl Ellone, so I kept my mouth shut. No need to go opening a can of worms Squall didn't want open.

"We will be arriving in Timber shortly." announced the automated voice. "For those getting off, please be sure to have all your belongings."

"But, seriously," gushed Selphie, "Sir Laguna was sooo cool!"

Zell rounded on Selphie almost immediately. "Hey! There was a Laguna in my dream, too! He's a Galbadian soldier, right!?"

As one they turned to Squall, staring at him with wide eyes. I imagined Squall's expression was appropriate for being stared at by two hyperactive monkeys prepared to leap upon the huge banana. Squall folded his arms over his chest, his sole defensive position. "Laguna, Kiros, and Ward." he said. "We all had the same dream."

Zell and Selphie began talking at once, asking questions, nearly shouting over one another to be heard. I rose suddenly and stretched instead of turning toward them, but my movement had the desired effect. They shut up immediately. I smirked. "Well, I didn't have the dream, so all I saw were three lazy SeeDs getting in some beauty rest before heading off to their first mission."

Squall glowered at me, faintly amused, but Zell became incensed. "Hey!" he said, poking me in the chest with his finger. "Just because Squall said you could tag along doesn't give you the right to make fun of us! We outrank you!"

"You just have a few fancy letters giving you a license to kill for money." I replied. "It takes more than that to be a SeeD."

"Yeah, how would a failure like you know?"

"Zell, enough." Selphie grabbed Zell's arm, trying to pull him away from me. "He's here to help."

She pulled Zell from the cabin, saying soothing and calming things to him. I watched them go, smirking. Squall wiped that smirk right off my face when he shoved me back on to the couch, leaning in with his hand over my throat, not quite choking, but threatening to with the light pressure.

"I expect you to work with them," Squall said lowly, his voice almost threatening, "not antagonize them."

I held up my hands in surrender. "He makes it so easy."

"Seifer." There was exasperation in his voice. He released my throat but didn't move back so I could get up. "I don't know why you have to act like this, but please... I know you're better than this."

With that, he left the cabin. I sat where I was a heartbeat longer, remembering the strength hidden in that slight body. After I decided I was settled enough, I got up and followed the others off the train, into Timber Station.


	7. Chapter 7

Seven - Squall POV

Seifer stood beside me as I surveyed Timber. It was a small town, nothing really worth mentioning. I knew as soon as we started down the stairs, Watts would call out our code, which would start us on this whirlwind ride. I glanced at Seifer. His expression betrayed nothing of what he was thinking, but I could tell by the way he held himself what I'd done had had an effect on him. I also realized he was standing a little closer to me than before, and I wasn't sure what that meant. I glanced up at him, tilting my head slightly in askance.

He smiled at me, his green eyes sparkling. "Don't worry, Ice Princess." he said softly. "I won't disappoint you."

I smiled slightly. "I know you won't."

He seemed shocked at my reply, but I didn't stay to continue the conversation. I headed down the stairs to meet Watts. I was tempted to tell him the wrong password just to see how he would react, but I didn't want to waste time. I would only be delaying the inevitable, anyway. Once we were on the Forest Owls' train, I introduced everyone to Zone and Watts, gesturing at Seifer last. Judging by the blank looks they gave him after shaking his hand, I knew they had never met him before. Which just left Rinoa.

"I guess it's just our princess then." Zone was saying.

Watts wrung his hands. "It's the princess' nap time, sir."

"Ahh, man..." Zone looked at me, looking sheepish. "Hey Squall, sorry, but could you go get the princess? She's in the last room, up those stairs. Some of our guys are in the room on the way. Ask 'em if you get lost."

Remembering how I'd reacted last time I'd been asked to go get the princess, I just sighed and looked at Seifer. "Would you mind going to get her?"

I expected him to argue, but he just shrugged. "Fine. I'll be right back."

I watched him step up the stairs, his footsteps heavy. I knew he wasn't pleased with the assignment, but I knew Rinoa wouldn't recognize me since I'd never met her before now. The only person she knew was Seifer. I kept watch on the hall, waiting for them to return. I felt silly, as if I was waiting for something to happen. I knew they'd dated, but that relationship had been over for a year.

 _Doesn't mean something can't happen._ said Ifrit, laughing darkly. _She's a hot, tight little beauty._ I felt the female GFs turn to him and glare, and he shrank somewhat under that onslaught.

I was about to go back there and retrieve both of them when I heard Seifer's voice growing louder. He was talking to her, telling her how he wasn't actually a SeeD, just there as back up, but she shouldn't worry because she was in good hands. Seifer filled the doorway first, coming down the stairs to stand with us again. Then Rinoa entered the room, grinning from ear to ear with excitement.

"Rinoa," Seifer said, his deep voice rolling through the room, "this is Squall. He's the leader. And this is Selphie and Zell."

She grinned even wider. "Hi everyone! This way."

I lingered in the hall as everyone else followed Rinoa into the planning room. I looked at Seifer, tilting my head again. He was tense, and his jaw was clenched. He returned my gaze and shrugged. "She's excited." he said.

"She was excited then, too." I replied carefully.

Seifer ran a hand through his hair. "I don't think she gets it."

"No."

Seifer blew out a breath. "If I'd known it was going to be like this, I would never have introduced her to Cid."

I smiled slightly. "Too late for regrets."

Seifer grunted and started to move past me. On impulse, I reached out and caught his wrist. He stopped and looked back at me, a smile dancing on his lips. I inclined my head and let him go. I entered the planning room and leaned against the wall, watching and only half listening to what Rinoa was saying about their plan. Instead, I focused on Seifer, who was keeping an appropriate amount of distance between himself and Rinoa. He was standing close to Selphie, his eyes narrowed as he studied the models on the table and listened to what she was saying. I could tell he found the plan workable. I had thought that, as well. But he knew what I knew - that the information they'd gotten in order to create this plan was false, leaked on purpose to account for an attack just like this. My decision at this point would be to decide to go through with it or call it off and attack the television station. Either way, we had to attack Deling. It seemed all too easy to run and hide now, to keep from acting. But I knew I had to, because whether or not I was involved, Ultimecia would go after Ellone, and she would try to find herself a knight to stall us.

Rinoa shoved herself back from the table and grinned. "Let's decide on the party!"

"Let's not." I said. I made my decision.

Everyone turned to look at me, stunned. Rinoa looked like she was about to cry. Or yell. "What do you mean 'let's not'?" she demanded. She pointed at the model. "This plan is perfect!"

"Maybe." I agreed. "Did you not consider that maybe the information you received was released on purpose? That maybe the President planned for something like this? This is a decoy. We'll attack the t.v. station."

Unable to stand their stares any longer, I left the room. As the door hissed shut behind me, I caught Rinoa's voice: "Seifer, what does he mean, we'll attack the t.v. station?"

I had to get out of here.

I stepped off the train and headed into Timber, unconsciously following the same steps I'd taken Before. I stopped when I reached the bridge that overlooked the train tracks and leaned on the railing. No one tells you how hard life will be because they haven't even experienced what life has in store for them yet. No one tells you that your decision will have far-reaching impacts, beyond what you can comprehend in the moment that you make them. But I knew. I knew what was waiting for us. One decision could create a new path in the future, but the events would remain the same. The problem facing me now was what would happen at the t.v. station. If I told Seifer to stay behind, I could very well end up forcing him to make the same decision he had Before. If he came, could I stop him from going with Edea?

"Glare any more and you might just cause ice to form."

I jerked, startled. Seifer caught my shoulder before I spun myself completely around, and I couldn't help but look sheepish. I'd been so focused on what I was facing that I hadn't even heard him approach. I pushed his hand off me, but I didn't push him away. "I was thinking." I said quietly.

Seifer just looked at me for a moment. "So I noticed. The kids didn't want to come out and deal with you, not with Rinoa questioning your credentials, so I volunteered myself."

"..."

"You think that I'd make the same mistake again if you brought me with you to the station?"

"..."

"You trust me that little?"

I shook my head. Words didn't come easy to me. Expressing my emotions didn't come easy to me. Even now, when I knew I was safe in Seifer's presence, it still was difficult, because I _knew_ the future. His future. Despite that, Seifer seemed to know exactly what I was trying to say.

He proved it when he said, "You're afraid for me. Not because of anything _I_ might do, but because you might not be strong enough to stop me."

I just looked at him.

Seifer stepped up beside me and leaned on the wall, staring at the tracks. When he said nothing, I joined him, our shoulders almost touching. After a minute, he said, "You can't stop what's supposed to happen, Squall. You also can't make my decisions for me. If I'm not strong enough to withstand her on my own, how can I stand beside you? Stand beside the man who becomes the Lion of Balamb, the Commander of SeeD?"

I clasped my hands together and tightened my hold until it hurt. "You really want to stand beside me?"

"You've made me do a lot of thinking, Squall. Maybe too much."

"..."

Seifer blew out a sigh. "You overthink things now, Squall. You look at what's happened, and you think if you don't make the right choice, it's going to end up exactly like that. But you've already changed one path, right? I'm standing here with you, not rushing off with Quistis chasing me. I know you trust me. Let me prove to you it's not unfounded."

"...Can I ask you something?"

Seifer looked at me, turning slightly to face me fully. His expression invited me to ask anything I wanted, but I really wasn't sure how I wanted to proceed. For a long minute, I just studied his face - how the line of his jaw was stronger than mine, how his chin was square where mine was round - and then I flicked my gaze over his shoulder toward the Forest Owls' train. "You and Rinoa..."

Seifer ran a hand through his hair and smiled without it really reaching his eyes. "Yeah. For about a year. I came here when Balamb wasn't far enough away from Garden. I met her, and we hit it off. She told me all about her movement, but they'd never really go anywhere without help. One thing led to another and we..." he shrugged. "After, I called things off, but we remained friends. I promised her I'd introduce her to Cid."

"You had sex with her."

Seifer nodded. "Yeah. Did you?"

"Of course not. ...But we kissed."

"Oh ho. So the Ice Prince was melted by the princess, huh?"

I could've just left it at that, but I'd already put my foot in the door. I might as well just come out and say it, I decided. "I only knew that you cared for her. So I had to protect her, because I thought she was important to you. It was the same thing for her. She saw me as important to you, so she made a choice to protect me, too. We both misinterpreted our actions. But by the time we realized it, we were an item. Everyone was trying to get us together. Everyone was expecting us to stay together. During the war, we didn't think much of it... Rinoa was the good sorceress, and I was her knight... it made our fight romantic, I guess. But we both agreed we didn't want each other like that. We agreed to pretend until the war was over, but..."

"But you got stuck in this void world, and ended up back at the beginning." Seifer said.

I nodded.

"You really think you're important to me?"

I didn't want the words to hurt, but they did, surprisingly. I looked up at him and frowned at the expression he wore on his face. He was studying me seriously, and I realized his words hadn't been meant to hurt me, but to get a straight answer out of me.

I hadn't told him that we'd known each other since we'd been five years old or so. I hadn't told him that we'd lived together in Edea's Orphanage, and that he'd been sent to Garden ahead of me. I could barely remember my early years in Garden because of the Guardian Forces, but I knew in my heart, before they started taking memories, we had been friends. Perhaps deep down, we'd both remembered our earlier lives without actually remembering them, and that had been part of why we'd been drawn to each other. We'd fought and bickered and antagonized each other, but we respected each other all the same.

I didn't trust myself to speak, so I nodded.

Seifer's green eyes became a shade darker as he studied my face. He seemed to know that I had held things back from him, judging by the way his expression shifted from neutral to curious and back again. I kept my face carefully blank. I didn't want to have to explain myself; first, I didn't know what to say, and second, I wasn't sure I wanted to explain myself.

Then Seifer surprised me by asking, "When did you first realize you had those kinds of feelings for me?"

I blinked, startled by his question. When? "...I guess when everyone started speaking about you like you were dead." I answered quietly. "I didn't like it."

"I'm not gay, you know."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

He turned away from me, his expression set in a soft scowl. "I've only been with women. I _like_ women."

"..."

"Don't give me that. I know for a fact that you've never let anyone get that close to you. About the only intimate thing you've ever done is take my gunblade to your face. Kissing Rinoa doesn't count," he added when I made a noise of protest. "Besides, you just admitted to me you didn't like her that way."

"...So I don't have any interest in anyone." I said quietly. "I'm just interested in you. Only you. If that makes me gay, fine. I don't care. Who's going to have the balls to argue with me?"

Surprisingly, Seifer burst out laughing. His deep voice rolled through the street as he threw his head back, genuinely amused by my words it seemed. When he looked at me, I could tell he was reassessing me. Then a big grin plastered itself across his face. "I'd argue with you."

"Of course you would." I replied tartly.

That only seemed to amuse Seifer more. There was a slight hesitation before he stepped toward me, closing the distance between us to the point I could feel his body heat. I stared up at him, unafraid. I shifted my body to challenge him, to challenge his intention. I was letting him know that I wasn't going to be used. If he made the decision he was considering, he was mine.

He saw that in my expression. That he would be mine. I think we were both startled when he whispered, "I'm good with that." And he kissed me.


	8. Chapter 8

Eight - Seifer POV

I didn't have the slightest clue of what I was doing. Squall had practically declared his love for me in his own strange way, right there on the streets of Timber. He'd challenged me. He'd told me in that silent way of his that I had two choices: retreat or go forward. I hated retreating. But going forward... if I did that, Squall had no intentions of letting me go. I could see that in the way he held himself, in the way those steely blue-grey eyes almost glowered at me. Squall wasn't the kind of man who tolerated someone playing with his emotions and his heart. I knew if I went forward, it would be the end of Seifer Almasy, ladies' man and the biggest player in Balamb Garden.

"I'm good with that," I said. Then I kissed him.

It was sloppy, as kisses went. It was mostly because we were both startled with my decision. Squall didn't seem to know what to do with himself, so he stood still and watched me watch him, even as our lips were pressed together. Then he drew back and I saw the barest of smiles on his face.

"I can do better," I said, not wanting him to think kissing me was going to be like that all the time.

"I'm sure." he replied, still slightly smiling.

I scowled at him. "What?"

He shook his head. I thought about pressing him for an answer, but I realized it was already written all over his face. Squall was happy. He was happy about this whole situation. In the Before, his entire life had gone through the shitter, but this time around, things were different. Things were better. The whole situation still sucked, but it was sucking a little less. I couldn't help but smile myself. Even if I had my reservations about being in a relationship with another man, Squall couldn't have said it any better - he was interested only in me. That didn't mean he was necessarily gay or even straight. It was the same for me. I'd tasted the softer fruits of the forest, and now I was going to sample the forbidden. It didn't mean anything. What mattered was the feelings we shared. Squall cared about me, that much I knew. Loved me. It wasn't something he'd come right out and admit. Frankly, it wasn't something I'd come right out and admit to him, either. And the longer I thought about it, thought about how our interactions had been, how our lives had intersected and how we'd interacted with each other, I realized that I really _did_ care about Squall. More than I thought I had.

Squall ran his finger over the scar I'd given him, the one that mirrored the one he'd given me. It was his silent declaration. I was his. I repeated his movement, confirming for him that I felt the same way.

Then I thought about something and asked, "You _are_ the girl in our relationship, right?"

His eyes narrowed so fast I thought he was going to call one of the demons and smite me where I stood. "Depends," he said at last, his voice quiet.

"On?"

"On whether or not you can be the man."

I smiled, broadly and lazily. "Oh, don't worry about that, Squally-boy. When this whole thing is over, I'll prove it to you."

Squall just nodded. Then he looked past me toward the station, where the Forest Owls' train waited. He inclined his head.

I shrugged. "We can't spend forever out here. They're expecting you to come up with a plan to attack the t.v. station."

Squall folded his arms over his chest and looked to the side. It was his usual pose when he was faced with a decision he didn't want to make. Finally, he blew out a sigh and looked toward the train. "I'll have to explain why we're doing that. They're going to wonder how I know the information."

"Which is that Deling wants to tell the whole world he's planning to relinquish control to the Sorceress in order to create peace and prosperity for everyone, but you can't tell them that you've already experienced this, and that's how you know."

Squall scowled but nodded.

I rubbed my chin, seeing his problem. He'd already shot down the Forest Owls' - Rinoa's - plan to attack the decoy train and had pointed them at the t.v. station. No one but Squall and I understood why he'd said that. He was going to have to explain it, and if _I_ thought he was crazy when he'd first told me the whole story of his Before, everyone else would think Squall had gone absolutely mad. I asked, "Why does Deling want to use the t.v. station here? Wouldn't it be easier for him to broadcast from Galbadia?"

"Because this t.v. station is the only one that can handle broadcasts over the air. Radio waves. Everywhere else is with HD cable." Squall's eyes went slightly wide. He looked at me and his lips twitched. "I could kiss you right now."

"Yeah?" I grinned, shifting so he could do just that. "You want to tell me why I'm so brilliant, too?"

He put his hand to my chest to stop me. "I can tell them we're attacking the t.v. station in order to declare Timber's revolution to the entire world. The only difficult part would come when we had to get inside. With the president there, security would be incredibly tight."

I was beginning to see where he was going with this. "Except I'm supposed to interrupt the broadcast on live t.v. by attacking Deling." I pointed out. "That sets in motion the events that bring you to Galbadia Garden and the attempt to assassinate Edea. If I don't do that, then who knows what'll happen."

"Are you suggesting I let you go and do exactly that?"

I shook my head. "No, not exactly. I'm suggesting you let me take Rin and the others to try and sabotage their broadcast. If it gets interrupted right before Deling introduces Edea and the Forest Owls are able to do their broadcast, then maybe we can keep as close to the other timeline as possible."

Squall canted his head to the side as he considered my words. I knew he was loathe to put me in such close proximity to the sorceress. If he could have his way, he wouldn't even let me get within a ten-foot-pole's distance of her. Except we both knew Squall couldn't have his way. If we didn't get caught up in the current of events that would bring us to the end of this path he'd set us on, we'd never really get anywhere. It was like throwing a rock into a still puddle. Once the ripples stopped, the puddle went back to being still. I knew Squall's main objective was to protect me from turning to the other side, to protect me, and to protect himself by stopping the events that would force him to raise his gunblade to my throat, but I also knew he couldn't stand by and do nothing. If we didn't fight Edea, Ultimecia would win. She would hunt down that Ellone girl and win. Even if we didn't change much save for a few steps here and there, I knew we had no choice but to enter into the Third Sorceress War, as Squall had called it. It was the only real way to save what he wanted to save.

And he knew it, which made his task all the more harder for him.

"Fine." Squall said, his tone of voice stating he clearly didn't like it. "But you promise me that you won't engage Deling or the sorceress. She came only because you threatened him."

I grinned. "Don't worry, Ice Prince. I know what to look out for."

He just looked at me. Then he brushed past me and headed back to the train. I followed, smiling the entire time. I could see the commander in him. His steps were measured and heavy. And, I had to admit, he had a nicer ass than any of my previous leaders. And now that ass was mine.

oooo

"Sei-ei-fer."

I turned to look at Rinoa as she approached me. Her hands were clasped behind her back as she stepped toward me in her usual 'I've-Got-Something-To-Tell-You' walk. Zone and Watts were hanging back, their heads together as they discussed something under their breath. I was pretty sure it had something to do with Squall. After we'd returned to the train and explained Squall's reasoning for going to the t.v. station, Rinoa was all for it. The first broadcast over radio waves in seventeen years being the declaration of Timber's independence? It was too good to ignore. But I knew, even when Rinoa, Watts, and Zone plunked themselves down on the floor of the train to come up with a plan, it wasn't going to matter. Whatever they planned to do would be foiled, one way or another. The only reason we were going through the whole charade was to keep anyone from figuring out that Squall - and I - already knew what was going to happen.

"What's up, princess?" I said.

She smiled at the use of the nickname I'd given her. "This Squall. He's the same one who's your rival, right?"

"One and the same."

"But he's a SeeD and you're not."

"Yeah."

"He wasn't very happy when I showed him the contract Cid gave us."

Contract, bah. I smirked, but it was more biting than amused. Squall had asked to see her contract on purpose in order to get Zell and Selphie to stop pestering him about why he kept insisting we aid the Forest Owls any more. Clearly, the mission was a failure, right? We all could just go home, our reputations slightly smeared, but in one piece. Except the contract stated that we were under Rinoa's command until Timber achieved independence, which wouldn't happen until we defeated Ultimecia.

"He's never happy. Squall is very serious when it comes to his missions. He's always been that way." I replied. I glanced up at the giant outside television screen above us. We were supposed to be waiting for the signal to sneak into the t.v. station, which was the broadcast itself. Squall's team of himself, Zell and Selphie were supposed to be dealing with the security so we had an easier time of getting in. Once the broadcast started, I was to lead Rinoa, Watts, and Zone into the station so they could sabotage said broadcast and do their own. I was _not_ to engage Deling. I was _not_ to be seen, or get anyone else seen. And, above all, I was _not_ to attract the attention of the sorceress.

Rinoa's head tilted to the side as she studied me. "You're hiding something." she said quietly. Her face was serious. "There's something you don't want to tell me."

There were lots of somethings, I wanted to say, but instead I lifted my shoulders in a shrug. "The SeeDs are doing all they can to make sure you guys stay safe. It's their job to head onto the front lines and take the brunt of the attack."

"I don't mean to be rude by asking this, but you're not a SeeD, Seifer. So why are you here? Why did Squall give you the more important job of protecting us while he and the others just get to watch the broadcast?"

"I'm here because Squall decided my skill set would only bring success. Besides, I know you. My knowledge would come in handy for Squall and the others in case something happened." It was almost the same story Squall had given Cid. I figured it'd work here, as well. "And I don't think I got the more important job. If anything, this is more about stealth than pure brute force. He's trying to do the right thing. He wants you to achieve your goals."

"He doesn't act that way." Rinoa pouted. She folded her arms over her chest and glowered at the street. "He just blew off our plan to attack the president on the train! Then he completely changed our plans! And while I admit his plan is better, he didn't even _ask_ us our opinion!"

I turned to look at her more fully. "This is his first assignment, you know. He doesn't want to fail you. He doesn't want to fail, period. So, yeah, he's gonna be harsh. I mean, _I_ know you're serious, but he doesn't know you at all. What he sees is a girl playing at resistance member. The three of you plop down on the floor to discuss strategy, which to him, is completely inappropriate for a resistance group who's serious to do. Second, you made a plan without checking all the facts first. He isn't going to trust his people to a job without assuring they - or you - won't be placed in unnecessary danger."

Rinoa's face fell. She hadn't considered all of this when Cid had agreed to send SeeDs to aid her and her movement. Her team had made wonderful plans, but they had been careless in their execution. She hugged herself tightly. "Maybe this was all a big mistake. I thought everything would work out fine once SeeD came to help us. But... I guess it's not that easy, is it? You aside, they were all hired. It's not like they're one of us. He must think this is all a game to us."

I reached out and put my hand on her shoulder. I gave it a tight squeeze and made her look me in the eyes. "He doesn't think it's a game to you. He knows just how serious you are. But he also knows you're not used to combat. Not like he is."

"But why didn't he ask us first?"

"My guess is that he didn't want you getting used to asking his opinion about every decision you make. A SeeD is trained to take orders and fulfill them, whatever they are. But you have a indecisive leader and you have the recipe for disaster." I withdrew my hand and shrugged. "Like I said, he's got six lives he's gotta watch out for. He needs to make the best decision that he can to protect those lives and achieve your goal."

Rinoa studied me, studied my face, for the longest time. Then she smiled and I knew I'd won her over for Squall. "I guess you're right. I shouldn't be so angry with him, I suppose. Squall's only trying to do what's best."

 _He's only ever tried to do that,_ I thought. And here Squall was, sent back to his past to try and change everyone's future. My future. He'd already done that in spades, but now we had to work toward making sure we stopped Ultimecia for good. Because she wouldn't stop. She wouldn't stop until she had succeeded. "Look, Rin," I started, gaining her attention again, "the best thing you can do is work with him, not against him. All right?"

Rinoa smiled. "All right."

I grinned and then turned back to wait for the signal. It didn't take long to come.

The static of the screen cleared and an image solidified. Rinoa, Zone, and Watts stared up at the screen in awe. Even I had to stare. But with the broadcast starting, it was time for us to move. I pulled on Rinoa's wrist, jerking my head toward the causeway that would take us into the station. She nodded, then pushed on Zone's shoulder to get his attention, and Zone pushed on Watts. They fell into step behind me as I started to lead the way into the station. Squall and the others had done their job with brutal efficiency, though I was pretty sure it had been Squall alone. There were no guards to bar our way as we headed into the station, no guards as we headed to the designated meeting zone.

Zell and Selphie were there, setting up equipment for Zone and Watts to use. Squall stood near the door, watching us as we entered. I nodded to him; he nodded back. Then he looked at Rinoa. "Everything's set up for you. Once you hack the signal, you can start your broadcast. You won't have much time before they try to get the signal back and more than likely send someone after us."

Rinoa grinned. "Don't worry. We'll be quick." She scampered over to Selphie and Zell with Watts and Zone right behind her. Squall watched her go before he turned to me, his head tilting to the side in askance.

I shrugged. "We talked."

His head tilted the other way.

"It wasn't that eventful. She's going to cooperate more, and not complain as much."

Squall's lips twitched into a small smile. "Guard the door with me." He stepped into the hall. I followed him.

"Do you think they'll succeed?" I asked softly, looking back into the room and watching Zone and Watts argue with Zell over which cable went where and where the camera ought to be.

Squall shrugged. "Doubtful. The most they'll be able to do is interrupt the broadcast by hacking the signal, but those two couldn't find their way out of a paper bag." He tilted is head to indicate Watts and Zone. "I'm betting the guards will come running once Deling's broadcast is stopped. At that point, we'll need to fight our way out."

"Wouldn't that cause the sorceress to come?" I asked. I kept my voice low, so no one could overhear.

Squall shrugged again, but he didn't answer me verbally. My answer came in the way he held himself. He was nervous; I could see it in the lines of his body. He was tense to the point he might shatter if I touched him. He didn't want the fight because he knew that I would be the one in most danger if it came to that.

"You don't think I could resist her?" I asked.

Squall tilted his head to the side as he considered my question. "I believe you could... but she's able to manipulate your emotions. To make you think the way she wants you to think. She messes up something inside you."

"I'm stronger than that."

"I know you are."

"But you're still afraid."

Squall nodded.

I ran a hand through my hair and glanced down the hallway, expecting guards at any moment. I wondered just how powerful this Edea woman was because of Ultimecia. I wondered how she could dominate someone as strong-willed and bull-headed as I am. But I knew better than to second-guess Squall at this point. If he was nervous, I had a legit reason to be downright terrified and on my constant guard while we were here. Except I wasn't afraid. I almost wanted to dare the sorceress to come and try to take me away. I wanted to prove to Squall that I was stronger, that I could beat her off. Except that would mean confronting her, and I was sure that was the last thing Squall wanted me to do.


	9. Chapter 9

Nine - Squall POV

We both turned at sudden, startled cries from inside the room, both of us holding our weapons at the ready in the event there was danger we needed to deal with. There wasn't any, at least not the kind of danger we were used to dealing with. Zell looked sheepishly at the two of us, then looked back at the wreckage that was once the camera and the broadcasting cables. Rinoa looked ready to claw his eyes out, and Selphie was doing her best to try and help Zone and Watts salvage anything that could be of any use. Squall and I hurried over to them.

"What the fuck happened?" Seifer snapped. I studied the mess on the floor. The equipment was beyond salvageable. There was nothing left to use. The whole plan was now shot to shit, and luck wasn't with us, because about five seconds later, we could hear the distant shouting of alarm.

"I... I didn't mean to!" Zell burst out. "I thought it'd be cool to try and get into contact with Garden first, you know to make a report, but it wasn't set up right or something! I'm sorry!"

"Zell!" I snapped, anger and fear blazing through me with a familiar bite. I didn't know if anyone was listening outside the door; if there was, it was too late for me to stop Galbadia from figuring out who sent us. If there wasn't... I needed to prevent another mishap like this. I knew it really wouldn't matter in the end, but Zell needed to know how much trouble his mouth could get us into. " _Shut up!_ If anyone heard you say that, everyone back home will be in danger! Do you want Galbadia to drop in on our doorstep?!"

I knew I had startled everyone. They'd never heard me so angry before. Letting my emotions get the better of me was something that happened easily now. Maybe it was for the best. Zell's eyes were wide and his face had gone two shades too pale. Even Selphie, who never seemed to stop moving, had frozen, the expression on her face clearly saying she didn't want my wrath directed toward her. I turned to look at Rinoa, fighting to keep my anger toward Zell in check and keep my head clear. Judging by her face, she knew my anger wasn't directed toward her. She regarded me with that careful expression, prepared to do whatever she needed to do. I guess Seifer really _had_ beat some sense into her.

"Rinoa, we have no choice at this point to abandon the mission." I growled, my voice low with hints of my anger. "We need to get out now, before the guards arrive."

"All right," Rinoa said slowly. She looked disappointed, but considering the conversation we'd head earlier, she didn't seem to want to argue. "We'll retreat for now. We've at least interrupted Deling's broadcast, considering the alarm. We'll regroup outside the t.v. station and figure out our course from there."

I nodded, agreeing with her assessment. If we got out of here before anyone figured out where we were, then we could still move about relatively freely. Before, only Deling knew where we came from and what we looked like. We still had the advantage of anonymity. I looked toward Seifer. "Get them out."

"What are you going to do?" he asked, his green eyes narrowing at me.

"I'm going to make no one is around to follow us." I was already moving, Lion Heart in hand as I stopped in the threshold of the door. "Don't stop. Don't look back. Just go."

Maybe I was hoping too much that Seifer would listen to me. Maybe I was trying to believe that he would actually do as I ordered him to do. I was halfway down the hallway when I heard him coming after me. I couldn't do much more than give him a glare, to which he responded with a broad smirk. Behind him, I saw the retreating forms of the others, led by Zell, heading back the way my team had originally entered. I raised my brow, silently asking him what was going on, and why he was disobeying me.

Seifer shrugged, brandishing Hyperion. "He wanted a chance to make up for pissing you off."

"I told you to-"

"Yeah, I know." he grinned wider. "But I'm not going to listen to you this time. You're pissed off, which means you might take more risks than you ought to. You're not junctioned; your GF's won't be able to manifest themselves fast enough to back you up. Besides, you wouldn't want such a blatant display of power here. So here I am. I'm the only one who can keep up with you, match you stride for stride, hit for hit. And I know if I'm here, you're going to do whatever it takes to keep me safe. Besides, I know why you're heading this way. If you think the sorceress is going to show up here like she did, you're going to try and confront her."

I narrowed my eyes at him. I hated that he read me so easily. I hated that he was right; I _did_ intend to confront Edea on my own, hoping that I could do something before Rinoa became a player in the sorceress game. It was a foolish hope, but I had to try. "I can do this myself."

"Probably. But like I said, you don't want a blatant display of your power here, especially when you're just supposed to be junctioned only with two or three GF's." He smirked in that irritating way of his. "If I'm with you, you won't do anything reckless."

I hated that he was putting himself in danger on purpose to make sure I didn't do anything stupid. He knew what he had to do to make sure I was safe, as well. I continued to glare at him.

Seifer reached out to grasp the back of my neck, pressing his forehead against mine. "Don't look at me like that. I know why you're doing this. You're trying everything you can to prevent the future you know from happening. You've trusted me this far. Let's keep going forward."

I sighed and pushed him back from me. "Fine. Let's go. But you do as I say. When I say it."

"As always, Ice Prince." Grinning with his victory, Seifer moved to take the lead.

We managed to avoid the Galbadian soldiers that were running crazily back and forth trying to find the technical disturbance. Namely, us. We made it to the main broadcast room and found it empty, save for the podium and the camera equipment. My assumption that the G-Army would get Deling out when the broadcast suddenly stopped seemed to prove itself. Just to be safe, I directed Seifer to stay silent and speak only with hand signals, to which he nodded. Together, Seifer and I moved through the room, keeping our steps slow and even, and keeping out of sight of the camera. We didn't know if that was still working, or if the broadcast had managed to fix itself after our unintentional sabotage. I didn't want anyone inadvertently seeing us. I grew tenser the closer we got to the other side of the room, because I knew as soon as we crossed into the next room, there was the all too real possibility of Edea/Ultimecia coming for her knight. I was creating that self-fulfilling prophecy by continuing to move forward.

We were just about to cross the threshold between the broadcast room and the room in the back when a shiver went down my spine. Lion Heart came up, quivering in my grip. Seifer looked at me oddly, but he moved to guard my back, Hyperion held ready. I knew immediately that he didn't feel it, that he didn't feel her presence. Maybe it was because I was already a knight that I could recognize the feel of a sorceress.

"Squall?" Seifer questioned as quietly as he could.

I didn't have a chance to tell him to run. I couldn't move even if I wanted to. I felt him stiffen against me as he finally recognized the danger. Or maybe it was because he could see her, like I did, gliding into view. Black dress, plunging neckline, sheer cape, headdress... she was everything I remembered.

"...Poor, poor boys..."

Her voice was Matron's. It was soft and soothing and it echoed in my head with thrums of power. It made me want to sheathe Lion Heart and kneel before her. But the way she carried herself was purely Ultimecia. Those gold eyes were narrowed with cruelty and hate, and her lips were curled sensuously into a derisive smirk.

"Stay away from us!"

The panic in Seifer's voice was almost palpable. Was this how he sounded the first time? When she first appeared to him and took him away, were these the words she said to him? I couldn't move to look at him, to warn him not to give in to whatever spell she was trying to cast upon us. I could see him out of the corner of my eye though, how tense he was, how wide his green eyes were. He finally sensed what she was; now he understood all the warnings I had given him.

Edea/Ultimecia's eyes slid to Seifer. Her eyes brightened a bit as she sized him up, looking him from head to toe. "Such a confused little boy. Are you going to step forward? Retreat? You have to decide."

"Stay back." Seifer growled, his foot sliding forward in preparation to attack.

She seemed stunned that Seifer was able to move despite the spell holding us in place. I shifted as well, but it was a minute movement compared to Seifer's. Edea/Ultimecia completely ignored me, favoring Seifer still with her gaze.

 _What should we do, Squall?_ Carbuncle asked me. The small GF was quivering just outside my consciousness, watching the exchange with everyone else. I knew that all I had to do was ask, and all of them would come to my aid. _Should we stop her?_

 _No._ _I made the decision to let Seifer do this on his own. If he's strong enough to resist her spell, then he's strong enough to resist her entirely._

The Guardian Forces seemed to accept this, but I knew they hadn't stopped watching. I raised Lion Heart - and suddenly found myself being flung backward, all the breath punched out of me. I hit the wall and collapsed to the ground, losing my grip on my gunblade. I looked up, gasping, and saw that Edea's hand was raised toward me, her eyes narrowed and her lips drawn into a vicious smirk.

Seifer was beside me instantly, grasping my shoulder even as he glared at the sorceress. Hyperion was raised in clear threat, and, once he assured himself I was uninjured, he stood in front of me to defend me while I recovered.

"Aren't you a loyal boy? Keeping careful guard over your companion, making sure he's safe. Such a good boy..." Edea/Ultimecia held up her hand toward Seifer, palm up, offering. _She's testing him. She's testing him, to see if he's worthy of being her knight._ I realized she had already dismissed me as her choice by attacking me. She wanted Seifer. I saw Seifer waver, Hyperion lowering a fraction. _No._ Edea/Ultimecia smiled. "The boy in you is telling you to come, to take my hand. The adult in you is telling you to back off, protect your friend. You can't make up your mind: help him or fight me? You don't know the right answer. You want help... don't you? You want to be saved from this predicament."

Seifer growled again. "Shut up. You have no idea what I know, or what I can do."

"Don't be ashamed to ask for help in protecting your friend. Besides, you're only a little boy."

"Stop calling me a boy." Seifer snarled. I struggled to my feet, grasping for Lion Heart. Seifer didn't shift, didn't move, even as I managed to gain my balance and stand beside him.

Edea was focused on Seifer so intently her eyes seemed to glow. "You don't want to be a boy anymore?"

"Seifer." I whispered.

"I got this, don't worry." He replied. "Lady, I don't know what you want, but whatever game you're playing, you're not going to win."

I saw the moment Seifer's words became a direct challenge to Ultimecia. Those gold eyes narrowed to slits before they became sufficiently wide and sad, almost disappointed. Then her lips began to move. Her voice was plaintive and sad. "What I want? What game I'm playing? All I want to do is help you, boy. I want to help you protect your friend. Look at him. One simple attack and he's laid low. You don't want him to get hurt, do you? I can help you protect him, boy. I can help you."

Hyperion wavered. Lowered. I looked at Seifer, unsure of what my expression was. Shock, I was certain. Seifer's eyes were focused on Edea/Ultimecia, the emerald color almost dull. She was winning him over. I reached to grip Seifer's arm, trying to silently remind him of what he promised me. He shook me off and started forward.

"Seifer-"

"Silence." Edea's voice was like a thunder-crack. "The boy has made his choice. Come with me to a place of no return. Bid farewell to your childhood."

Seifer, standing between us, half-turned to look at me. His hand lifted in a wave, his expression blank. He was looking right through me, as if he couldn't really see me. I took a step forward, or at least tried to. I couldn't move. I couldn't speak. I railed against the power that held me fast, frantically trying to reach Seifer. I called to the Guardian Forces, but as Seifer had pointed out, I wasn't junctioned to them. Even as Diablos started to manifest himself, it was a fraction too slow. Edea/Ultimecia gave me a look of complete and utter victorious satisfaction, then took Seifer's arm.

They simply vanished.

The power holding me disappeared and I took two steps forward before I collapsed to my hands and knees. Diablos appeared in the room, looking down at me almost sympathetically.

 _A self-fulfilling prophecy,_ he said, quoting Seifer. _What will you do now, Squall?_

I closed my eyes tight and half curled up on myself. Questions swirled in my mind: Why had she come? Had she been tipped off somehow? Or had she been here all along, waiting? Had she been watching us? Why hadn't I just left with the others? Why had I allowed Seifer to come with me? A thousand others spun around in a destructive gale, and not one was I able to answer.

 _Squall?_

 _Squall?_

 _Commander._

I snapped my head up and stared at Eden. The serene Guardian Force floated at the edge of my consciousness, surrounded by the others as they deferred to her. Her calm washed over me, chasing away the whirlwind of questions. _All is not lost,_ Eden continued. _We can still save him. Changing fate is not an easy feat to accomplish. Always it will try to correct itself. Work with it instead of against it._

I felt all the GF's fade from the forefront of my consciousness then, though their presence remained in the far reaches. I slowly got to my feet and retrieved Lion Heart from where it had fallen when I'd gone to my knees.

If I understood Eden right, then all I had been doing was rushing headlong into the events I had strived to stop. Which meant everything was going to happen exactly as I remembered it, and I would be powerless to stop it. I had to let everything play out as it was going to, but change the little things that I could. I couldn't change the big events, the life-changing events. But that didn't mean I couldn't figure out a way to get Seifer back before we once again went down the path where I had to fight him to the death.


	10. Chapter 10

Ten - Squall POV

I rejoined Rinoa and the others outside the tv station and was bombarded by questions. Everyone wanted to know where Seifer was, why he wasn't with me. I had to tell them that he was taken by the sorceress, which meant I had to explain to them what her presence meant. It was easy enough to do; I simply told a facsimile of the truth. Edea had been waiting in the main broadcast room for someone to show up, and when we did, she took Seifer prisoner. I didn't tell them that he'd gone with her willingly. Zell looked incredibly crestfallen. I knew he believed it was his fault; he believed that Seifer had sacrificed himself in order to protect us and Garden. I chose to let him believe it, rather than correcting him. It would teach him to watch his words while on a mission, and that a single slip could have dire consequences.

"...He'll be okay, right?"

I looked at Rinoa. She was watching me with a calm expression, her doe-brown eyes focused on my face. I nodded slowly. Seifer would be just fine. Ultimecia wouldn't hurt him. But she would get information out of him, about Garden and SeeD. I knew she would begin to hunt us, the Seeds, and she would begin to hunt Ellone. My greatest fear, though, was what she would learn if Seifer told her everything I had told him. I had to trust that whatever manipulation she had worked on him, it wouldn't be enough to make him betray everything I'd given him in the strictest of confidences. If I'd only found some way to give him one of my GFs, maybe they would have erased those memories, or at least maybe they would've protected those memories from being stolen.

A saddened expression appeared on her face. "They found our base. It's completely destroyed."

"What? How?" asked Selphie.

Rinoa shrugged. "The Galbadian army is always searching for the resistance movement. Considering how we've been operating lately, it was only a matter of time."

"And everyone else?"

"They're fine. They're good at escaping."

We stopped just under the tv monitor outside the station. I kept my gaze forward, studying my companions out of the corner of my eye as I tried to think about what we should do next. I knew we would eventually have to end up at Galbadia Garden, but I couldn't just come out and _say_ that just yet. I had to get us out of the open, because the G-Army would be hunting for whoever sabotaged the broadcast. Even if we acted like we had nothing to do with the event, they would still detain us anyway.

Rinoa saved me from having to take the initiative by saying, "We have to stay away from Timber for a while. Is there a safe place you can take me? This is an order, an order from your client."

"...All right." I said lowly. I gestured toward the bar a little further down the alley. We quietly made our way into the bar to hide while we figured out where to go. As I expected, the woman called 'Chief' offered her home to us as a safe haven. We went upstairs to avoid being caught by the Galbadian soldiers hunting through the houses for their prey.

It felt different without Quistis there to continue the conversation once we were safe. I stood by the window, looking out of it onto the street below. Zell hunkered in a corner, gripping his knees. Rinoa and Selphie shared the bed, the former holding her head down so her dark hair formed a curtain around her face. Selphie was laying back, staring at the ceiling.

"What's going to happen to Seifer?" Zell asked quietly.

"I don't know." I answered softly, working hard to keep my tone even and emotionless.

"Do you think the sorceress will kill him?" Selphie asked, also sounding subdued.

"He may already be dead." I hated the words as soon as I said them, but I didn't know what Ultimecia would do to Seifer this time around.

Rinoa's head snapped up and she glared at me. "How can you be so casual? I feel... sorry for him."

 _...Feel sorry... Seifer would hate to hear that._ The smirk crept its way onto my face before I could stop it. Weren't those the exact same words we'd said Before?

Rinoa's glare grew teeth. "What's so funny!? You're terrible! So... why do you think Seifer may already be dead?"

 _Because... because if Ultimecia gets him to repeat everything I told him, she won't suffer him to live. She won't suffer_ me _to live._ "Didn't the president of Galbadia say that he joined forces with the sorceress? That makes her a Galbadian envoy, a diplomat. He drew a weapon on her, a sure threat. It's no surprise that Seifer may be killed because of it." I said softly.

"Even so!" Rinoa jumped to her feet, fists held in front of her tightly. "I still hope he's alive."

 _Me, too._ I glanced at Zell and Selphie before I refocused on Rinoa. "Just don't get your hopes up." I said at last. "Life has a funny way of not going the way we want it to go. No matter what happens, no matter how much it hurts, you have to keep moving forward. It's the only way you can survive."

Rinoa's mouth worked for a minute, unable to think of a retort for that. The childish selfishness that had been glimmering in her eyes faded as the brilliant young woman I knew she was took a step forward. She nodded and hugged herself.

There were footsteps on the stairs as the Chief approached. She glanced quickly at all of us, then focused on Rinoa. "The Galbadian forces are withdrawing. Only the soldiers normally stationed here will stick around. If you're gonna leave town, now's your chance! You know how persistent those soldiers can be!"

We followed the Chief back down stairs, gathering in the kitchen. Everyone was looking at me for direction. I met each of their gazes in turn. "We have to get out of here first," I said, folding my arms over my chest, "and getting out of here is only the first step."

"What do you mean?" Zell asked.

I canted my head at him. "Garden Code, Article Eight, Line Seven."

Immediately I saw Zell and Selphie's eyes go wide. Only Rinoa remained confused. So I turned my attention to her and explained, "In the event that returning to our assigned Garden isn't possible, we report to the nearest Garden. Which means we need to head to Galbadia Garden."

Rinoa nodded almost sagely, a small smile playing on her lips. "We can take the train from here and get off at a station called East Academy."

"Do you know how to get there from the station?" Selphie asked me.

I shrugged, the expected reaction. Of course I knew how to get there, but they weren't supposed to know that. "We'll know it when we see it. It wouldn't hurt to be prepared, though. You both are junctioned, right?"

Both Selphie and Zell made answers in the affirmative, and I felt the ripples of amusement coming from my GFs. Even here, they would answer the calls of my companions, even if they weren't junctioned to me but them. I wonder what would happen if Zell called on a boosted Diablos and watched the demon decimate the enemy with just a look. That thought alone relaxed something inside of me, and I clung to the tiny fledgling hope that everything would work itself out.

"Okay then," I said. "We'll escape from Timber and head to Galbadia Garden. First and foremost, we have to act as if we don't know each other. Since there's four of us, it'll be easy." Selphie blanched at my suggestion, but she didn't argue. Rinoa only looked thoughtful. "Let's go!"

The Chief stepped forward then, handing Rinoa a small box. "You be careful, now. Take this with you. And, good luck."

We left the Chief's house in two pairs - Selphie and Zell, and Rinoa and myself. We kept our distance from each other as we headed toward the train station. Our efforts to remain inconspicuous didn't stop Zone from giving us our tickets, and thankfully there were no soldiers within sight to stop us to ask questions. Once we got on the train, I made sure to open the door for Selphie so she wouldn't cause a scene, then focused on Zell. He'd been incredibly quiet since leaving the Chief's house, and I couldn't blame him. Not only had he possibly given our enemies something credible to work with in identifying the culprits behind the sabotage at the tv station, but because of his actions, Seifer was now in danger. If he hadn't broken the equipment, Seifer and I wouldn't have had to stay behind. I watched his face for a long while, but I knew anything I could offer him wouldn't make him feel better. So I left him alone, like I had done Before, and prepared myself for what was ahead.

Eventually we arrived at the East Academy station. I let them mill around for a while as I pretended to scan the horizon for any telltale sign of the Galbadia Garden. "That way," I announced, pretending to have seen what we were looking for. In reality, I only knew the way because of Before, so I led them away from the station and into the forest ahead.

"We can't be too far from Galbadia Garden now, right?" Rinoa asked.

I shook my head.

"Heeey, I was just thinking..." Selphie started, tapping her fingers against her cheek before she pointed to the sky. "There might be some bad news from the Galbadian government. What if we get caught and then get broadcast to the whole world...!?"

"Whatever happens, happens!" Zell snapped. "Now come on! Let's just keep going! I... I'm worried about Balamb Garden... and I'm even worried about that douchebag, Seifer. If anything happens to him or to Garden, it's all by fault... I'm the one who caused the problem. I'm the one who made Squall and Seifer go to cover our asses. ...You think the president will retaliate on Garden?"

"Depends." I replied.

"On what?"

"On what they do to Seifer. If they torture him and he breaks, then no one is safe." I kept it at that. Zell looked stricken again.

"B-b-but, we have a whole bunch of SeeDs at Balamb Garden! They won't lose to the Galbadian army, would they?" Zell's voice cracked at the end, a true sign of his fear.

I shrugged. "Depends on how strong the army is. But remember, this is Seifer we're talking about. He won't break so easily. We have to operate under the assumption he's compromised because we have no other recourse right now. But we will try to rescue him."

Zell looked at me with surprise. I wondered if he had expected me to condemn Seifer to his fate. The old me probably would have done so. But not this time around. I swore I would change things this time around, and I would do it. Then Zell cracked a smile and nodded enthusiastically. "Yeah. Yeah, you're right! Seifer's taken worse licks than this, right? He'll be just fine. I can't wait to see the look on his face when I come waltzing in to save him."

He walked ahead to catch up with Selphie, grinning. I canted my head toward Rinoa as she came to stand beside me, a small smile on her face. "You know, you're a good leader." she said. "You seem to know just what to say to make them feel better, even if the whole situation came about from a bad decision."

I made a noncommittal noise and kept my face stoic. _Beats what she yelled at me Before. A callous leader... a man who relies on no one but himself... one who doesn't think about, or worry about, the well-being of his comrades..._ "Should I continue to punish him for a mistake?" I asked her quietly. "No one alive is without fault. Mistakes are made so we can learn from them. It's what you do with what you've learned that matters."

Rinoa smiled up at me, and I saw on her face the lovely young woman that I had done stupid and reckless things to protect because I thought Seifer loved her. That, maybe, I loved her. I felt the familiar tug of the sorceress-knight relationship that would begin between us even then. So I averted my eyes from her and started forward. And, even though I was expecting it to happen at some point, I felt Ellone's powers enter me so quickly that I involuntarily gasped. Then I knew nothing at all.


	11. Chapter 11

Eleven - Squall POV

When I woke, I wasn't surprised to find Rinoa hovering over me. As usual, Zell and Selphie were awake before me, waiting anxiously for me to wake up. They exchanged glances with each other before they started firing questions at me: did I dream of Laguna too? Do you think he'll be okay? I raised my hand for silence as I slowly got to my feet.

"Look," I said, "we'll just be wasting our time trying to figure it out. Let's keep going."

Zell grinned lopsidedly. "Yeah, let's go! I think we're almost there."

Rinoa grasped my arm when I started to sway, her firm grip keeping me rooted in place. "Are you okay, Squall? What happened?"

I shook her off, gently but firmly. "Would you believe me if I said it's nothing?"

"Of course not."

I sighed. "Every so often, we black out. All of us. We don't know why. But when we do, we dream of this other world, of this man named Laguna and his two friends, Kiros and Ward."

"I was worried about all of you." Rinoa said quietly. She continued to move forward, pausing to look back at me. "I didn't know what to do with all of you incapacitated like that. It was... it was scary. But I didn't know where to go to get help, and by the time I decided to do something, Zell woke up. He tried to write it off like it was nothing, but he was worried. I could tell."

I nodded but said nothing. It was no surprise to me Ellone was still trying to change the past by using us. Even though I had told her it wouldn't work, she wouldn't give up until she figured it out herself. I only hoped she had gone immediately to Esthar like I had told her to, although, judging by the fact no Esthari soldiers had come hunting for me yet, I doubted it. _I swear, next time I see her, I'm going to remind her that sisters listen to their brothers._

Shiva chuckled. _Yet, she is your elder._

 _It doesn't matter. You're younger than Siren, but she still defers to you._

Shiva burst out laughing at this, her clear musical voice echoing through my mind like little pealing bells. _Indeed. But think about this, Squall - if she didn't believe herself safe, would she be using her powers?_

I shook my head even though the Guardian Force of ice couldn't see me do so. Rinoa gave me a quizzical look, but I pointedly kept from looking at her as I walked. Shiva resettled herself at the edge of my consciousness, smiling serenely at the other GFs in my head. They all seemed to be amused in one way or another, even Bahamut, who generally viewed things with cynicism.

We emerged from the forest onto the Great Plains of Galbadia. Directly ahead of us was Galbadia Garden, rising high into the sky. As the others ran ahead of me, I slowed my steps until I was almost at a full halt. When I had first laid eyes upon Galbadia Garden, it had been as a scared and tense young man moving without much direction to his life. His first mission had been an utter failure. His entire thought process had been consumed with worry about the only home he had ever known, about the people who lived there. He had tried to figure out how he would live his life if something he cared for was suddenly taken away, and he couldn't handle it. He couldn't handle the idea of being thought of in the past tense. Now I was looking at it as the weapon of mass destruction it would be. Now I was looking at it through the eyes of someone who _knew_ what secrets the Garden held, through the eyes of someone who knew that you couldn't get through life alone, that a failed mission didn't always mean the end. Now I was seeing it through the lens of experience, and for all that experience, I still didn't know what to do.

How ironic.

I caught up with the others and together we entered Galbadia Garden. It was still full of organized activity that I remembered, with cadets flying from here to there on their machines and other people walking by without even taking notice of us.

"Wow..." breathed Selphie. "Completely different..."

"Sure is quiet." Zell commented.

I grunted but didn't say anything. I led the way further in, unsure of what to do now that we were actually here. Before, Quistis had been the one to go see the headmaster and explain our situation. I didn't have that kind of luxury. I couldn't just walk in and ask to see the headmaster of Galbadia Garden without good reason. And if no one knew about what had happened, then it would be incredibly awkward to explain that we were here because a member of our team got kidnapped and there was a possibility that Balamb Garden was in danger? I didn't know how far the president's transmission had gotten before the sabotage had ruined it. Had Deling introduced Edea? Had he told the world of his plans? Considering that Rinoa hadn't corrected me, I assumed he had. But even still, would Deling feel as though he'd been attacked and use the situation to condemn Garden?

"Squall! Squall, there you are!"

I looked up to see, of all people, Quistis running toward me; behind her was Raijin and Fujin. She caught my shoulders and studied my face, just like a big sister trying to ensure her younger brother had come away unharmed. I didn't fight her, mostly because I was shocked to see her and Seifer's posse. When Zell and Selphie approached us, Quistis inspected them too, hugging Selphie tightly and grasping Zell's hands with a big smile on her face. Then she looked at Rinoa and her expression changed from genuinely pleased to cool, and I saw Rinoa stiffen slightly as she realized that Quistis was studying her the same way an instructor studied a new student.

"Quistis, Raijin, Fujin," I asked, somehow finding my voice, "what are you doing here?"

She turned to look at me and straightened. "Headmaster Cid sent us here to speak with the headmaster. Since I've been here several times before, and I know him pretty well, he figured I would be the best to act as a messenger and liaison. Raijin and Fujin accompanied me as backup and to look for Seifer."

I nodded. I should've realized that Fujin and Raijin would've chased after Seifer, whether he told them to stay or not. I glanced at Fujin; her head canted to one side and her crimson eye narrowed at my face. Whatever she saw there made her nod her head toward me, and elbow Raijin in the ribs. The big man clamped his teeth shut, which allowed me to refocus my attention on Quistis. "Why did he send you here?"

"You were in Timber. You saw the broadcast, right? President Deling announced his plans to bring about world peace by allying himself with the Sorceress Edea. Not too long after that, the broadcast was suddenly interrupted." At Zell's sudden flinch, Quistis quickly put two and two together. "Ah, I thought so. _You_ interrupted the broadcast."

"Yes, we did." Rinoa said suddenly, showing that steel in her spine as she stood straight and tall before Quistis. "Upon my orders, the SeeD loaned to me infiltrated the tv station and attempted to hijack the signal so that my resistance movement, the Forest Owls, could broadcast our own message."

Quistis looked Rinoa up and down, from head to toe and back again. Then she looked at me, her lips a thin line. "Just after I got here, an official notice came over the wire. It said that two young men attempted to assassinate the sorceress, and though she subdued one, the other escaped. The attack was classified as an independent action, but we can all read between the lines."

"It was you and Seifer, wasn't it?" Raijin spoke up suddenly, a smirk on his face. "Shoulda known Seifer wouldn't have gone down without a fight."

Fujin elbowed him again, harder, putting force to Quistis' glower. She looked at me, her lips drawn into a thin line. I met her gaze, hoping she would understand what I couldn't say. Surprisingly, the stoic young woman nodded and folded her arms over her chest.

"Did they blame Garden?" Zell asked Quistis, his face a little pale.

Drawing her gaze away from Raijin, Quistis shook her head. "There are plenty of mercenary and resistance groups in the world besides ours. The Galbadian government did say, however, that they don't believe that the Gardens, who are known for raising mercenaries, were involved."

Some of Zell's color returned and he started to relax. "So Seifer didn't talk then?"

"That's why he's not with you, I take it?" Quistis asked, looking directly at me. Her voice was hard, her eyes harder. "The sorceress captured him?"

"EXPLAIN." Fujin said, her voice holding an iron note.

I nodded slowly. I explained everything, from the moment we met with Rinoa and her resistance movement to the infiltration of the tv station and the events that took place there. I knew I didn't need to justify my decisions, as I was the squad's leader, but I reasoned that we needed to make sure no one followed us out and we weren't compromised in any way. I left out the part where I had intentionally set myself up in that self-fulfilling prophecy and instead said the sorceress ambushed us. "She took him, and let me go. Just like that. There wasn't anything I could do." _And that is something I'm going to change as soon as I can._ "So we came directly here afterward, hoping to get some new direction and news."

"Do you think Seifer took all the blame?" Zell interrupted.

Quistis' eyes grew sad. She twisted her hands in front of her, then blew out a sigh. "The trial's over, and the sentence has been carried out..."

Rinoa's eyes went wide. So did Zell's and Selphie's. Quistis looked like she was about to cry, but was bravely holding it all back.

"BWAHAAHAAHAA!" Raijin burst out laughing, throwing his head back. "That's gotta be a lie, ya know!? There's no way he'd put up with a trial, ya know!? Or an execution for that matter! It's just so not Seifer, ya know!?"

Fujin nodded. "FIND!"

"O'What!... We're gonna meet up with Seifer? Well, see ya, guys. We're gonna head off to Galbadia to look for Seifer." With that, he and Fujin took off running.

Quistis stared after the two of them, startled. So did everyone else, in varying stages of disbelief. I was the only one who didn't react. I knew they would go to the ends of the earth for Seifer, because they were friends. A posse. Even if I had told them I was going to rescue Seifer, they would still run off on their own to look for him.

Rinoa's voice, shaky with barely restrained tears, drew me back to the conversation at hand. "He was executed? ...Of course he was... He attacked the sorceress. He sacrificed himself for the 'Forest Owls'..."

I saw a dozen emotions flash over the faces of Selphie, Zell, and Quistis at her words. Anger, sadness, regret... they were all feeling the things I should've been feeling. But I didn't feel sad. I didn't feel angry. I didn't feel anything. I knew Seifer wasn't dead. I _knew_. And yet, I couldn't bring myself to say anything. I couldn't bring myself to tell her it wasn't true, that it was all a lie. That Seifer was, even now, possibly being tortured and brainwashed and manipulated into becoming a monster that would fight us to the death and kill tens of thousands of people between the missile attack on Trabia, the attack on Balamb with Galbadia Garden, and the Lunar Cry. I crossed my arms over my chest and bit my tongue until I tasted blood. It was the only way I was going to keep quiet.

Quistis rounded on Rinoa, her eyes blazing. Though her voice was calm and collected, I could hear the notes of anger to her words. "It was your group that got Seifer involved in all this. You're a resistance faction, right? You must have been prepared for the worst. I'm sure Seifer was prepared, too, when Squall asked for permission to bring him along. All SeeDs are prepared for the eventuality of being killed in the line of duty. Seifer didn't sacrifice himself _for_ you. He was doing his job." She took a deep breath, then immediately relented. "I'm sorry. I guess that wasn't much consolation."

Rinoa glowered at Quistis, her brown eyes tear-bright. A few even escaped before she quickly wiped them away. "I... really liked him. He was always full of confidence, smart... Just by talking to him, I felt like I could take on the world."

"Your boyfriend?" Selphie asked, her tone curious and comforting, trying to find common ground.

I ignored what she said next. It didn't matter anyway. Seifer had met Rinoa in Timber and the two had ended up dating for a while. Did more than date. He'd told me that himself. But he'd broken up with her, after realizing that the innocent, naive, frightened little girl was just a persona Rinoa used to get her way. That she really did have strong steel in her spine and could be just as rough-and-tumble as the rest of us. That she knew what she wanted, and she would do what she had to in order to get it. I realized in that moment that, in order to be able to accomplish what I needed to accomplish in the coming days, I needed her to put away the spoiled princess and become the strong sorceress she was destined to be. I needed her to be the woman she was going to become only after I rescued her from being sealed away at the Sorceress Memorial in Esthar, and I needed her to do it now rather then later.

I would also need to junction with some of my Guardian Forces. It didn't surprise me that Bahamut was the first to volunteer.

I looked up at Quistis, finding her studying me intently. "What did Cid give you to give to the headmaster here?"

"That's just like you," Quistis said, smiling sympathetically, "getting right back to work. But I don't know. I was merely ordered to give him a letter. And-"

Whatever else she was about to say was cut off when a voice came over the loudspeaker, asking us to head to the front gate. I didn't wait; I turned on my heel and headed for the front gate. The others fell into step behind me, silent despite the fact I knew they wanted to ask me a barrage of questions.

As we loitered around the front gate of Galbadia Garden waiting for Martine to show up, I moved over to Rinoa. I gently grasped her upper arm and drew her away from the others. I couldn't subvert fate any more than I already had, but I could at least try to prepare her for what the future was going to contain. "Rinoa," I started, keeping my voice low and serious. She regarded me with curious brown eyes, her lips in a thin line. "From here on out, it's going to get dangerous. Frightening. If you want to go somewhere safe, I'll arrange it, but if you choose to stay, I'm going to treat you like a SeeD. Do you understand?"

Her eyes widened slightly. Then they became seriously thoughtful. "I want to stay," she said slowly, "because there's really nowhere safe for me, if you think about it. I can't return to Timber. I know I'm... I'm not as good in battle as you guys are... but... but I won't drag you down."

Despite myself, I smiled. "Good. Also, I want you to drop the spoiled princess act. There won't be any room for it going forward. I know you have steel in your spine. It's time to use it."

She smiled back at me, her expression a cross between surprised and relieved. "You know, Seifer told me about you. He said you were always too observant for your own good sometimes."

Whatever she was going to say next - or whatever I could've said in response - was drowned out by the roar of a car's engine. Turning to face the approaching vehicle, I gave Rinoa a light push toward the others and we lined up as Martine stepped out of the car. We saluted him, with Rinoa a half-beat behind. I wasn't surprised Martine didn't notice; he was too occupied with setting us up to take the fall for Edea's assassination.

"Good day." Martine spoke, his voice deep and authoritative. "I have official orders from Headmaster Cid addressed to you. Following regulations, I have gone over these orders. After careful consideration of our options, we have decided to fully assist and cooperate with Headmaster Cid. Actually, we, too, have bene planning this for quite some time now. In order to stress the importance of this mission, I must first brief you on the current situation." He smiled. "At ease. You all know about the sorceress being appointed as the peace ambassador for the Galbadia government. However, this ambassador thing is just a cover up. There will be no peace talks, only threats." He continued to talk, detailing Galbadia's true plans and the plans for Edea's assassination. I took the orders when he handed them to me and leafed through them.

"Any questions?" Martine asked me.

I glanced up at him, raising my brow. "Are you going to provide us with the sniper? There is no one here with that skill."

Martine grinned, but I could tell it hurt him to do so. "Don't worry about that. Let me introduce an elite sharpshooter from Galbadia Garden. Kinneas! Irvine Kinneas!"

I barely spared Irvine a glance as he walked toward us. I didn't even look back at him as he walked up and down our line, studying us each in turn. I noticed (again) that he spent a little too much time studying the girls, especially Selphie and Rinoa. I had the serious urge to punch him in the face but resisted - barely.

 _Shiva._ I growled.

The ice Guardian Force huffed and folded her arms over her chest. _He would deserve it._ Siren agreed wholeheartedly, and I felt the male GFs take a slight step back from the females. The only ones who didn't react were Cactuar, Tonberry, Doomtrain, and Eden, though they eyed their fellow GFs with wary confusion.

I ignored them as Martine said, "This is Irvine Kinneas. He will be your sharpshooter. Leave whenever you're ready. Failure is not an option." Then he got into his car and drove away.

I waited for Irvine to stop being childish before I turned to my companions. Rinoa swallowed hard, and I knew that, despite the bravado she had displayed during our conversation, she was afraid. Everyone was looking to me, looking for me to explain our new mission.

The words came too easy this time around. "Our next mission," I said, "is a direct order from both Balamb and Galbadia Garden. We're to assassinate the sorceress. We're to shoot her from afar. Irvine will be our sniper. We're to support him to our fullest. Should he fail, we'll attack head on."

Irvine smirked. "Thanks for the support, but I never miss my target."

 _No, you just choke at the critical moment._ I glowered at him and he actually took a half-step back from me. Keeping my tone even, I continued, "Eliminate the sorceress. That's our order. We're going to head to the capital of Galbadia, Deling City. There, we'll meet up with General Caraway to go over the details of the plan. Let's get going."


	12. Chapter 12

Twelve - Squall POV

I made sure Zell and Rinoa stayed with me, allowing Selphie and Quistis to go with Irvine. I knew Quistis would keep Irvine from misbehaving and acting inappropriately with Selphie. The reason I kept Rinoa with me this time (originally I had sent her with Irvine and Quistis just to keep her away from me) was to ensure I could coach her on what I would need from her in the coming days. She listened intently, surprising me by asking me a few questions here and there about the role I wanted her to have. Hers was to be a supporting role to the rest of us, a back-up fighter and healer. She appreciated that I wasn't putting her on the front lines of battle, considering she wasn't used to battle like we were.

When we got on the train, I immediately opened the door for Selphie. She grinned at me, then headed through the door. Irvine was quick to follow her through, and I knew what he was going to attempt to do. When he emerged and headed over to Rinoa, I lashed out and grabbed him by his coat, slamming him up against the train's wall.

"You're playing a major role in this mission." I snapped. His eyes went wide in surprise. Good. I wasn't the Squall he remembered, and I wasn't going to entertain his silly notions this time around. "I expect you to behave yourself. I expect you to do your job."

He gripped my wrists, glaring at me. "No one understands me... Sharpshooters are-"

I cut him off, growling, "Loners by nature. I know. I get it. You hone your instincts, pour your whole being into a single bullet. Ask me if I really give a damn. You only need to focus on shooting. Your single act is going to be a signal to the rest of us. If you don't believe you can do that, tell me now."

"S-Squall," Quistis started, reaching toward me.

Irvine threw back his head and laughed. It sounded incredibly relieved. He released my wrists and held up his hands in surrender. "You got it, boss man. I can be your signal, no problem."

I nodded and released him, then stepped back from him. Irvine gave me a long stare before he moved to stand against the wall, folding his arms over his chest. Quistis and Zell gave me searching looks, but I ignored them. The rest of the train ride was relatively peaceful after that.

When we arrived at Deling City and headed up to the streets, Rinoa stretched her arms above her head and blew out a long sigh. "We're going to Caraway's Mansion, right? Just take bus eight."

Zell looked at her, surprised. "Sounds like you know this place pretty well."

 _She should,_ I thought, _because the mansion's her house. Caraway's her father._ I couldn't help but think of the irony of the situation now that I knew all about it. How close had Rinoa and I come to being half-siblings? My father and her mother had danced around the possibility of being more than just friends; certainly they had been in love with each other, or at least thought they had been. In the end, though, things had turned out far different than either had probably expected.

Things were turning out completely as I had expected they would, though. When we reached the mansion, we were told we had to go to the Tomb of the Unknown King and retrieve the ID number of the missing student from Galbadia Garden. It was a simple side trip I could care less about, and I couldn't help but agree with Zell's assessment this time around, but I took my team out there anyway because I knew the guard wasn't going to let us through otherwise. It didn't take us long to complete the task, especially because there was no need to go deeper into the Tomb. The Brothers were hovering at the edge of my consciousness with the other GFs, after all.

When we returned, we were let into the mansion by the guard. Rinoa grabbed my hand suddenly and stopped me from following everyone else inside. I looked at her, my head tilted to the side.

She refused to meet my eyes. "Um... what you said before... about you needing me? About me being an honorary SeeD? You meant that, right?"

"Of course I did." I replied quietly. "I won't leave you in this house."

She looked up at me, grinning uncertainly. "Want me to explain why?"

"Because Caraway's your father."

She blinked rapidly, her mouth hanging slightly open. "How'd you figure that out?"

I shrugged. "You started acting strangely when we entered the city. You knew which bus to take. The guard at the gate recognized you even though he didn't say anything. And now this. It wasn't hard to figure it out." Never mind the fact I already knew. "I don't care what's going on between you and him, but don't let it interfere with the mission."

"I promise it won't." Rinoa looked fairly relieved. "Thanks, Squall."

I nodded. We entered the mansion and headed to Caraway's office. This time, Rinoa surprised me by taking a seat on the couch in the office and folding her hands demurely in her lap. The minutes ticked by, slowly turning into hours. I settled against the desk, my arms folded across my chest as I watched the door through my bangs. I realized what was going on; it was a pissing contest between father and daughter. In the Before, Rinoa had rushed out to complain to her father about making us wait. Caraway had been waiting for her to do just that, entering just after she had left to give us our orders. Now, though, she was acting just like a SeeD, waiting for her contract to arrive.

In the end, Rinoa's will proved stronger than her father's, and General Caraway entered the study, a grim expression on his face. He glanced at his daughter, who gave him an icy glower. I saw him turn slightly toward her, his fingers curling into fists before he put his arms behind his back and clasped them. "Rinoa."

"Father." She replied, her voice cold.

"I would have you stay out of this operation. You haven't received the training these SeeDs have, and you may become a burden."

I saw the anger spark in her eyes and I knew a retort was coming. I pushed away from the desk, effectively interrupting her and making Caraway focus on me. I kept my voice even as I explained, "Despite the direct order from both Galbadia and Balamb Garden, we are technically working for Rinoa. As such, I've decided that it's best for all parties if she remains with us. I will personally take responsibility for her. Therefore, General Caraway, please focus on the mission at hand rather than any family squabbles."

While everyone else stared at me like I had grown a second head, Rinoa was fighting to keep her face still. Still her lips twitched at the edges, showing that she wanted to grin widely.

Caraway's eyes narrowed at me. "And if I choose to interfere?"

"I'll act accordingly." I didn't bother to hide the threat in my voice. I kept a steady, icy glare pointed in his direction. Caraway paled slightly.

"Hey, hey, hey, fellas..." Irvine started, his voice breaking through and allowing us both to back down graciously, "we're here to knock off the sorceress, right? So let's get down to business. One more person isn't going to make much of a difference in the plan, right?"

Caraway glanced at Irvine, then at Rinoa, and finally refocused on me. "...Let me explain the plan."

We followed Caraway outside the mansion and listened to him talk about the Galbadian government's agreement with Edea and the ceremony to commemorate the event. I barely paid attention to him, following him mechanically as he explained his idea. I was too busy sorting through my Guardian Forces, junctioning Bahamut, Shiva, Eden, Cerberus, and Eden to myself. I already knew who I wanted on the gateway team and on the sniper team, and it was mostly to ensure that the people who would try to stop me from saving Seifer were as far away as possible. I turned inward and focused on Carbuncle, who was the central part to my plan to get Seifer away from Ultimecia. I had never really junctioned others without their - or the GF's - consent, but now I was going to try something that no one in history had ever really done before.

I was going to force-junction a Guardian Force onto Seifer.

 _Do you think you can do it?_ I asked Carbuncle. The GF's ability was to cast reflect upon the party when summoned. My theory was that he would be able to use his ability to reflect Ultimecia's influence back upon her, thus freeing Seifer from her control. The only drawback I could see was that Seifer would have to stay junctioned to Carbuncle for the effect to remain in place.

 _I... I think so. I've never done that kind of thing before._ The tiny GF stood on his back legs and pawed at the air, turning his right paw over left and right, almost like a hand. _If it doesn't work..._

 _If it doesn't work, I'll draw you back._

 _Okay. I can give it a shot. My best shot._ he added, giving me a furry little smile.

Despite knowing he couldn't really see it, and everyone else who saw me do it would think I was crazy (if they didn't already), I smiled. _Thank you._

By the time I was finished hashing things out with my own GFs and ensuring that those who wouldn't be part of my junctioning would stay out of the fight unless things really took a turn for the worse, Caraway was finished explaining the plan and was instructing us that all we had left to do now was to wait for the proper time. He warned us to stay out of trouble, as if that was difficult for us, then looked at Rinoa. Her head came up slightly and her expression dared him to say something to her. In the end, the general quietly excused himself from our group, telling me, "Report to my residence when you're ready. We'll hold a final meeting then. After that, we'll proceed with the operation."

I nodded. Then I looked at Rinoa and canted my head to the side. Immediately, she moved to stand beside me, smiling up at me. "Don't worry," she said, "whatever's between me and him, I won't let it affect the mission."

"That's good to know. But don't antagonize him unreasonably. I wouldn't put it past him to try and lock you in."

She waved her hand in dismissal. "Of course, but I know the secret passages of the house. Besides, what's going on between me and my father..." Rinoa trailed off, looking away and actually looking upset about it. She blew out a sigh. "I'm his only daughter, right? And ever since Mom died, he's become super over-protective. I had to sneak out just to make it to Timber and since then, I've been trying to make him proud of me, even though I'm basically working against him, you know?"

I smiled. "I'm sure he's proud of you, Rinoa. But he _is_ your father, and we're about to go do something that could get you killed. He's just worried about you."

"Yeah, and he doesn't know you, Squall. You won't let anything happen to me, least of all let me get killed. I trust you." She patted her chest, right above her heart. "And I believe in you."

Well, that made at least one of us. I looked away from her to the rest of my party, saying, "You can go explore the city if you want, but be back at the mansion in at least two hours. The sooner we get in position, the better."

Zell and Selphie exchanged glances, then looked toward Quistis and Irvine. All four then looked toward me with grim, determined expressions, and I knew they weren't about to go off on their own. They, too, wanted to get this over with as soon as possible. I acknowledged their determination with a tilt of my head, then started toward Caraway's mansion. They all fell into step beside me, and oddly enough, once more I felt like Commander Squall Leonhart, the Lion of Balamb, leading my pride into battle.


	13. Chapter 13

Thirteen - Squall POV

We met back up with Caraway in his study and entered into our pre-mission briefing. Caraway looked at Rinoa with a pleading expression on his face, but she ignored him. I briefly entertained the idea of chucking both of them out into the hall so they could fix whatever was going on between them, but that would only serve to antagonize the situation more. Rinoa was a very stubborn girl; until she was ready to talk, she wasn't going to forgive her father for whatever she perceived he'd done wrong, and she wasn't going to make the first move. Caraway seemed equally stubborn, but he swallowed the words he really wanted to say and instead focused on us.

"It's time to form the teams." he said. "The sniper and the leader of this operation will form the sniper team. The leader's role is vital."

 _Of course it is,_ Bahamut growled from deep in my mind, _because if anything goes wrong, the leader is supposed to fix it at the risk of his own life._

 _Welcome to being a SeeD._ I replied, earning another snarl from the king of dragons. _At least this time around I have a trump card._

 _What's that?_

 _You._

That seemed to both mollify and please Bahamut, so the dragon was content to curl up in his spot and observe the rest of the proceedings.

Caraway continued, "If the plan fails for some reason... or should the sniper miss... the leader must carry out a direct assault against the sorceress. The plan was devised carefully, because we intend this to be a covert operation. But our ultimate goal is to eliminate the sorceress, and we must achieve this at all cost. Even if they uncover our identities. So, who's going to lead the operation?"

"I am." I said, my voice firm. I already knew what was going to happen, and I pretty much intended it to go exactly as it had Before, with a few minute differences. I _wanted_ it to go the way it had gone Before, so that I could confront Seifer before anyone else arrived to "help". I already knew what would happen after that, and even though I really wasn't looking forward to going to the D-District Prison, I was determined to make sure I wasn't going to go with an icicle in the shoulder this time.

"Fine." Caraway said, his voice a little hard. "I'll leave the rest up to you."

I met his gaze levelly, making sure I kept my expression blank. "Irvine, myself, and Rinoa will make up the sniper team. The gateway team will be Selphie, Quistis, and Zell."

"Whoo-hoo!" said Selphie, grinning.

"Roger." Quistis smiled and nodded.

Zell grinned widely. "Let's DO IT!"

"Sooo," Selphie began, her smile faltering a little, "who's gonna be the leader of the gateway team?"

Last time, I had chosen Quistis to lead the team, and she had ended up abandoning the post to go apologize to Rinoa. In the end, it hadn't really affected the outcome, but since Rinoa was going to be with me and Irvine this time, there really wasn't any need for her to be the gateway team's leader. Zell, on the other hand, was acting a little overzealous again, punching the air like he expected me to name him the leader.

I looked at Selphie. "Do you think you can handle the position of team leader, Selphie?"

Her eyes went wide and her mouth dropped open slightly. Even Zell and Quistis looked shocked. Then Selphie smiled and assumed an "I'm ready!" stance. "I can do it." she replied, grinning brightly. "I won't let you down, Squall!"

Caraway seemed anxious about Rinoa being with me and Irvine, but there was a distinct lack of tension to his body. He seemed to accept that I was placing Rinoa with me on the team that would be playing 'least in sight', at least until the inevitable happened and I went to face Seifer and Edea/Ultimecia head on. I knew they would hurry to back me up, but I intended to have Seifer on my side before they got there, limiting the need for one of them to fight. If all went as I hoped it would, Irvine and Rinoa wouldn't have to get involved at all, since Seifer and I would be able to handle whatever Edea could throw at us on our own.

I looked at Irvine and Rinoa, focusing mostly on the former. "I'll make the first charge when we make the full-on attack. I'll try to buy some time."

Irvine smirked, but I could see the glimmer of nerves already in his eyes. "That won't be necessary... I'll get the job done."

This time, I believed him. Since our little altercation in the train, Irvine had been slightly less cocky than before while we went through the motions of this mission. If he listened to me, he wouldn't choke at the last second and force me into becoming his therapist of all of two minutes. He would take the shot. He would still fail to kill Edea, but at least I would begin moving sooner rather than later.

He stepped closer to me, his head tilted toward mine in a way that indicated he wanted to have a private conversation. I knew what was coming, but decided to humor him. It was the least I could do, after throwing him an unexpected curveball and then berating him for not being able to catch it. "So like... is it true that SeeDs aren't supposed to question their mission?"

"Aren't supposed to, no." That was a notion that had changed very quickly when I found my expected life suddenly spiraling into the unknown at a breakneck pace. "Should we?" I shrugged. "I believe you should try to fulfill the mission as best you can, but if you have to choose between the mission and the lives of your team, choose your team."

He blinked, completely having not expected my answer. But it was the truth. It was a truth and an answer that I had come up with over time, after experiencing everything I had, risking my life for not just Rinoa, but Edea, Cid, and everyone else, too. After a moment of contemplative silence, Irvine asked, "So... what if you knew your enemies were pure evil? Would you get more fired up to fight them?"

I shrugged again. "I doubt anyone is pure evil. Just a product of their environment." _Even Ultimecia,_ I had to concede. There were too many what if's to answer in that particular case, but I was also fairly certain that, even if Ultimecia had been shown some semblance of kindness in her life, she still would've ended up attempting the Time Compression in order to escape her fate. I continued, "Right and wrong aren't what separate us and our enemies. It's different standpoints. Our perspectives separate us. Both sides blame one another. There's no good or bad side, just two sides holding different views."

 _Yet, we aren't really sure what Ultimecia's true motive was,_ Diablos pointed out. _Was it simply to escape her fate, or was it for another reason entirely?_

 _Well, when we see her this time around, why don't I ask her?_ I asked tartly. Diablos growled at me, but let the subject drop. No matter what, if she used Time Compression again, she was undoubtably going to kill everyone, and that was something I couldn't allow to happen Before and I couldn't allow to happen now.

We reached the archway and Caraway moved to unlock the door for the gateway team. "The gateway team will wait inside the gate until 20:00." he explained, stepping back. "You can enter through this door. The sorceress will pass through the gateway at exactly 20:00. In that instant, lower the gates using the control console located on the top floor and trap her inside the gateway."

"Gotcha." Selphie said with a smile. She, Zell, and Quistis entered the archway without even a glance back to me. That was a good sign, if I ever saw one. My team followed Caraway back toward the entrance of the Presidential Residence and slipped into the crowd. I caught Caraway giving Rinoa a strange look, but she once more pointedly ignored him. I wondered if my father had ever been so stubborn when it had come to my well-being. By the time we actually met, I was old enough to be taking care of myself. Besides that, I didn't know how to be a son and I was sure as hell he didn't know how to be a father. But before either of us had had a chance to find out, I had gotten lost in the Time Compression and thrust back to the beginning.

Well.

There's another thing I could change, isn't there?

At last Rinoa looked at her father. "Why has the sorceress decided to have such an extravagant parade?"

"She wants to establish her place in Galbadia Garden, since she has chosen it to serve as her base." Caraway answered gruffly. He looked at Rinoa, reaching out to grasp her shoulder. He did nothing more than give her shoulder a squeeze, then looked at me. "It's starting. I'm returning to my residence. Good luck."

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Rinoa turn to watch her father's back, and expression of sadness on her face. "It's not too late," I whispered, knowing she would hear me.

She shook her head. "When all this is over... when it's all over, I'll talk with him. I promise."

I said nothing, instead turning my attention to the clock above the Presidential Residence, waiting for the countdown to end and the gates to open. We didn't have to wait long.

"Here she comes." said Irvine.

I felt Rinoa grip my arm as Edea approached the microphone. Was she already feeling a pull? I had to wonder. Rinoa was destined to inherit the powers of Edea and of Adel, making her an incredibly powerful sorceress. Was there a possibility that she could already feel that subconsciously? Or was I looking too far into an innocent gesture made out of pure nerves and fear? After all, this was the very woman her father seemed to be so scared of. I didn't have any experience with my father to gauge behavior, but then... well. My father is an idiot.

"...Lowlifes. ...Shameless filthy wretches." Edea/Ultimecia began, her voice strong and powerful. I winced as the cheers went up, almost deafening. Rinoa and Irvine looked around at the cheering crowd as if they were stupid. _Sheep,_ I thought immediately. _They're all just sheep._ They continued to cheer as Edea/Ultimecia spoke, cheered as Edea/Ultimecia killed President Deling in front of them, cheered as she left the podium and a corpse behind her. They continued to cheer, even as the gate slowly began to open.

"Now's our chance. Come on! What are you waiting for?" Irvine started moving through the crowd. I pushed Rinoa after him, if only so she wouldn't catch a glimpse of Seifer. I hesitated, though, if only to reassure myself he was still there, still riding on that damned float.

He was.

He didn't see me. Or, if he did, he didn't recognize me. I couldn't think about that now. I moved after Irvine and Rinoa, slipping through the open gate and into the Presidential Residence. When we arrived at the carousel, I picked up the sniper rifle and handed it to Irvine.

"Remember," I said, "you're just the signal."

Irvine cracked a half smile at me. "Right. Just the signal."

I watched him move to a corner and sit down, his eyes riveted on the floor. Just as well. I knew that even with my advice, he would still have to psyche himself up for the actual attack. At this point in the Before, Irvine was the only one who knew he was going to be shooting Matron, the woman who had taken care of all of us when we were little. Before we were adopted or shipped off to Garden. He was still firing upon Edea, someone he loved. And that wasn't an easy thing to do.

I looked at Rinoa. She was hugging herself, her eyes on the floor. As if she felt me staring at her, she looked up and met my gaze. A tiny, brave smile flitted across her mouth. "I saw Seifer."

I nodded. "He's in the parade with the sorceress."

"...What does it mean?"

 _That he's her knight. That he will lay down his life for her and her ambitions if she demands it of him._ I didn't say that, of course, instead shrugging. "Point is, he's alive." I said. "I'm going to get him back."

"What if he won't come back? What if you have to kill him?"

My body turned cold so suddenly that I actually shivered. What if I had to kill him? Hadn't I done that already? I had found him, bloody and broken, while I walked through the void between times. I had found him, destroyed by my own hand. He'd died in my arms, apologizing to me. _Apologizing._ For something that _I_ had done to him. My eyes stung; I quickly blinked back the tears. "It won't come to that," I said hastily, hating the way my voice sounded so thick. I knew she'd heard it, because her gaze became sharper and her eyes roamed my face. "I won't kill him."

"But you're both... prepared, right? That's the kind of world you live in." Rinoa said, her face holding a sad expression. I couldn't tell if she was faking it or if she was being serious. I twitched my shoulders in response. Rinoa looked away. "But if you say so."

 _Of course I say so._

Minutes later, the carousel began to move. We rose into the sky, affording us a wonderful view of Deling City, and an unobstructed view of the sorceress' float trapped within the gateway. I looked at Irvine, wondering again if he was going to choke. But he moved, balancing his rifle with steady hands. I was already moving as he fingered the trigger, and he fired without even batting an eye. I saw Edea fling up her hand and the shimmer of a barrier, just as I expected. I picked up speed and leaped past Irvine even as he turned to apologize to me. I heard his and Rinoa's stunned cries as I fell at least three stories down to the podium and from there to the car. I faintly heard Rinoa call my name, but it was too late to respond to her. I flung the car into drive and sped through the crowd, narrowly avoiding hitting people, to the trapped float.

It wasn't much longer after reaching it that I stood before Seifer and Edea. Seifer leered at me from Edea's side, and I could see the glimmers of Ultimecia in Edea's expression. I forced my gaze back to Seifer. I couldn't let Ultimecia know who I was, what I was, trusting that she hadn't gotten anything out of Seifer before she turned him to her side.

"Well," Seifer said, his voice haughty, "this is how it turned out."

I said nothing, instead readying Lion Heart. _Carbuncle, get ready._

The little GF shifted to the very edges of my consciousness, just at the barest limit of my actual control. He was bunching up, tensing his body, getting ready to make the leap between my consciousness and Seifer's. I was hoping what I intended to do would work. If it didn't, I wasn't sure what I was going to do.

Seifer's lip curled. "Aren't going to say anything? Fine then. I doubt there's anything left for us to say anyway." He came at me fast.

I let him have the first strike, because he sure as hell wasn't going to get a second. I ducked under the swing that would've taken off my head and when he was wide open, I surged upward and dropped Lion Heart so that I could grab the arm wielding Hyperion. Once I had a firm grip so he couldn't backswing and hurt me or him, I lashed out with my other hand and grabbed hold of his short blonde hair, yanking his head back to the point his spine threatened to snap. I hooked my leg around one of his and twisted us, effectively tethering him.

 _Now, Carbuncle, now!_ I cried.

Using our physical connection, Carbuncle leaped from my mind. I could no longer feel him even at the furthest reaches of my psyche, but I could still sense him. The Guardian Force was forcing his way into Seifer's mind, through the spell Ultimecia had cast upon him. Seifer struggled against me, cursing and shouting threats, but I held on as tenaciously as I could, refusing to let him go. I was afraid that if I _did_ let go, my force-junctioning of Carbuncle to him would be for nothing, and not only would I lose Seifer, but I would lose Carbuncle as well.

Then, suddenly, I couldn't sense Carbuncle anymore.

Seifer suddenly sagged in my hold.

Gasping in surprise, I went down hard to avoid dropping Seifer, which I ended up doing anyway. He groaned as he hit the ground, his eyes fluttering this way and that under the lids before they finally opened to stare at me. He seemed confused, both by his position on the ground and mine over him. I watched him look around, saw anger crease his brow when he recognized where he was.

My first thought was, _I failed._

Then Seifer said, "Squall, what the _fuck_ did you do to me?"

I laughed, half-hiccuping because of the surge of sheer joy that crashed through me. "Is Carbuncle there? Did it work?"

"Carbuncle...? You mean that kid's voice I can hear in my head?"

I nodded.

"What did you _do_ to me?" Seifer groaned as I helped him sit up.

I retrieved Lion Heart after we disentangled ourselves from each other. "I'll explain later."

Before Seifer could say anything more, Edea/Ultimecia hissed. "...A SeeD. ...Planted in a run-down Garden. Taking my knight from me."

I gripped Seifer's wrist to keep him from retorting. Instead, I stepped forward, allowing her to get a good look at me. "He's not yours. He was never yours." I lifted Lion Heart and pointed it toward Edea's chest. "I'm taking back what's mine."

Edea's expression never changed, but I saw the attack coming. Without Carbuncle to reflect the damage of the spell back onto her, I had no choice but to take it to the face. I heard Seifer curse as the magic hit me full on, then another expletive as I remained standing. When I had junctioned myself with the Guardian Forces, I had made sure to make myself immune to whatever Edea was going to dish out. I saw her lips twist into a disgusted scowl as she realized this, but she couldn't figure out how I could have done such a thing. There was no time to explain, no time to even think, for Edea began attacking me in earnest, all but ignoring Seifer and Rinoa, who had entered the fray.

It was over in a matter of minutes, but I still couldn't bring myself to deliver the final blow that would kill Edea and force Rinoa to become a sorceress sooner than when fate intended. I saw the icicles forming and knew I needed to move, otherwise I would have an old wound reopened. But I couldn't make myself move, instead staring at the missile that had given me my first (well, second, but I wasn't counting the scar across my face) real taste of excruciating pain.

"Squall!" Seifer bellowed, reaching for me.

I felt myself falling backwards, and this time I saw both Rinoa and Seifer's faces staring down at me.


	14. Chapter 14

Fourteen - Seifer POV

 _Why are you mad at me?_ whined Carbuncle from within my mind. The green-furred GF was wringing his paws as if they were hands, his crimson eyes looking incredibly sad. _I only did what I was asked to!_

 _You forced yourself on me!_ I retorted, earning a boyish whine from the Guardian Force. More accurately, _Squall_ had forced Carbuncle on me. Why, I hadn't gotten to ask him yet, since Squall was passed out on the only bunk in the small cell we currently shared. I focused on him from where I sat beside the bunk on the floor, then absently reached to brush a few stray locks of hair away from Squall's face. Because Squall was currently out cold, I only had a working theory for his actions. Carbuncle was a GF that cast a powerful reflection spell upon the party, so Squall must've believed that the little demon could use his ability on a more psychological level. My mind had suddenly become clear the moment he'd been force-junctioned to me, as if a great haze had been lifted from my thoughts. Everything that I thought was good and wholesome about my being with the sorceress was suddenly and irrevocably shown to be bad.

Every thought I'd had while under her control made me sick now when I thought of them. I remembered everything she had done to me, from the torture to the questioning to the promising, and I hated myself. I had given in so easily. I had walked away from Squall, just like that. Yet a small part of me must've rebelled against the sorceress, because the last thing I could clearly remember was her promising me my desire, and getting my promise that I would tell her whatever she wanted to know the moment I had him in my grasp.

 _Fuck,_ I thought, bashing my forehead into my forearm and closing my eyes tight, _she knows about me and Squall. Is that why we're in the same cell? In the hopes that her spell or whatever might kick in and I'd have him ready and waiting for me?_

 _It won't kick in,_ Carbuncle said, his voice sounding affronted that I would even fathom the thought that he wasn't good at his job.

I didn't bother to retort this time, considering I was screwed if the GF decided to stop obeying Squall and left me to return to his real master. As it was, Squall was stirring, so I knew it wouldn't be too much longer before he woke.

I grinned as I watched those stormy grey eyes blink open. He focused on my face first, his gaze roaming all over before he allowed himself the tiniest of smiles. Then he looked around and blew out a sigh.

"So," he said quietly, "I guess we ended up in D-District Prison after all."

"Is that where we are?" I asked.

He nodded. He slowly pushed himself up and swung his legs off the bunk. It allowed me a place to sit, which I gratefully took. There wasn't much space in the cell otherwise, and I didn't much like sitting on the floor.

"Do you remember how we got here?" I asked.

"No. Do you?"

"Not really. That's why I was asking." He narrowed his eyes at me, and I smiled.

He blew out a sigh again. "Last time I was thrown in here, it was because I failed in taking out the sorceress."

"Well, at least that remained the same, right?"

He shrugged. Then he looked at me, his eyes traveling from my head to my toes and back again until he focused on my eyes. "Don't be too hard on him. I was the one who came up with the plan to force-junction him to you."

"So he's told me several times and with much whining." I ran a hand through my hair. "What made you think of that idea? Force-junctioning a GF on someone isn't normal, you know."

"..."

"So in other words, you didn't think you had any other options. You were just going to give it a shot and pray it worked."

"...It worked."

I looked at him. He looked at me. It struck me he wasn't going to apologize for what he did, but neither was he going to take Carbuncle back and risk losing me again. I studied his face and realized he was happy, relieved, that I was back and that I was with him. I hated myself anew. Even if the sorceress promised me Squall, he never would've been happy being under my control. Being forced to do whatever I wanted him to do. I looked away from him, clenching my fists.

"...?"

"It's nothing."

 _Liar._

He didn't have to say it. It was practically palpable in the air around us. "She promised me you," I said at last, growling out every word. "She promised me you, my dream and my desire, in exchange for me telling her everything about Garden."

"What about everything I told you?"

"That too. You for all my secrets." I cursed and slammed my fist into the bunk beneath us. Squall barely reacted. I turned to him suddenly, reaching out to grab his wrist. "I didn't tell her. I didn't!"

Squall studied my face for a heartbeat too long. "I believe you." he said at last. He reached out and stroked my cheek, leaning his body into mine. His hand moved to my coat and gripped tight. "I believe you."

I pulled him closer and hugged him tight. I didn't like the way his voice had turned husky at the end. It sounded like he was going to cry, and Squall had never done that in all the years I had known him. But then, this Squall wasn't the same boy I had grown up with. He had lived through this already. He knew what was going to happen, what he could change and what he couldn't. He had probably cried plenty of times where no one could hear or see him do it. I couldn't fault him for doing it now, not after he had succeeded in saving my stupid ass. Eventually, he pulled back and we sat side by side, leaning against each other.

"So," I said after a while, "what now?"

"Not sure." he responded. "Before, you had me brought to a torture chamber and electrocuted me until I told you what SeeD was for."

I whipped around so fast that he actually fell backwards. I stared at him, mouth agape. "I did _what_?"

He looked at me with narrowed eyes and rubbed the back of his head. "You were still under her control then. You would've done anything she told you to."

"But I... I _tortured_ you?!" I wished there was room in the cell to get up and pace. But there wasn't, so I settled for punching the closest wall. "Shit, Squall! She made me do things to you, and you still saved me? You still believe in me?"

"...She made you." he reiterated quietly. "Seifer, I know you're capable of cruelty, just as I know how kind you can be. She brought out the worst in you. A sorceress' knight is a reflection of the sorceress herself. The worse she is, the crueler he becomes."

"But you're not blaming me."

"Tch." he snorted. "Of course I'm blaming you. You're the idiot who wasn't man enough to tell her to fuck off. Twice." I glared at him. He matched my glare with an icy stare of his own. Squall sat forward, bracing his arms on his knees in his familiar way, but he didn't break eye contact with me. "But at the same time, it's not wholly your fault. And... and I love you. So of course I saved you. Of course I still believe in you. Like I told her, I took back what's mine."

I saw color fill his pale cheeks as he said the words. The image, like the words, burned itself into my memory. He knew it was partially my fault and he wouldn't let me forget it, but neither was he going to continue hounding me about it and making me feel worse than I already did. I leaned closer to him, deciding to take a page out of his book for once. Instead of saying anything, I kissed him. His lips were soft against mine, resistant at first. Then they slightly parted, allowing me to deepen the kiss and taste the hot cavern of his mouth. I didn't let the kiss continue, mostly because if I did, we'd both end up hating each other and ourselves because there wasn't enough damn _room_ in the cell, and pulled back to meet his gaze.

"So now what?" I asked, and at once his demeanor seemed to change. He knew I wasn't asking about our amorous escapades.

He shrugged. "About now, Irvine's come to get Rinoa out. They'll get maybe a mile from here before she tries to claw out his eyes." I laughed. That certainly sounded like the Rinoa I knew. Squall continued, "They'll come back and rescue everyone. Originally, I was already out of this cell, so they reached me upstairs and freed me."

"Well, seeing as I'm not there to give you some shock therapy, do you think they'll realize we're still in this cell?"

He shrugged. Then his head tilted to the side, and a strange expression came over his face. I tensed, feeling as though I should be trying to find the furthest corner from him. Instead, I held my ground and asked, "What is it?"

"The Moombas."

"The... what?"

Squall smiled gently, just the tiniest little twitch of the lips. "You'll see."

He shifted to peel off one of his gloves and raised his hand to his mouth. Before I realized what he was doing, or before I could stop him, he bit into the soft skin of his index finger until it bled. I stared as the crimson liquid beaded at the mouth of the self-inflicted wound, and looked at Squall with wide eyes. He just smiled at me and lifted his slim shoulders in a shrug.

A moment later, I nearly lost my balance as the cell we were in began to move. Squall remained impassive, his finger now stuck in his mouth to try and stop the bloodflow. I stared at him, more accurately at his lips, and wondered what else might look good in that mouth. Judging by the way his eyes narrowed at me, it was a subtle hint to keep my mind out of the gutter and focus on the task ahead, which was actually escaping. But there was a glint to his eyes that said he wouldn't be averse to my thoughts at a later date. I couldn't help the grin that twitched across my mouth and I inclined my head to accept his offer.

The cell came to a halt and the door's hissed open. Standing there was a small group of two or three little lion creatures, all of them staring at us with wide liquid eyes. Squall shifted to push past me, slipping his glove back on as he did so. The moment the child-sized lions saw Squall, they began to squeak excitedly, bouncing around him in an awkward little dance.

"Laguna, Laguna! Laguna, Laguna!" they crowed.

Squall canted his head to the side as he regarded the Laguna-yipping creatures, then looked back at me. "These are the Moombas."

"The fuck _are_ they?" I asked.

"They're the evolved form of a race called Shumi. They can remember people by smelling or licking their blood." Squall put a gentle hand on one Moomba's head and smiled up at me. It wasn't a true smile, rather one that told me he was smiling because he believed it was the proper response to a situation like this. I raised an eyebrow as I regarded him, and his smile faltered. "They know my blood because they know my... my father's blood."

"...Wait. What? Your... your _father_?"

He looked away from me. "It's a long story."

"You know your _father_?"

He kept his gaze away from me. "'Know' is a relative term."

"But-"

"Seifer."

I took the hint for once and shut up. Clearly, Squall didn't want to talk about his mysterious father, and he wasn't going to give in to my badgering. I studied his expression and realized that speaking about his father actually hurt, not because of the abandonment he clearly still felt, but because he didn't actually _know_ his father in the truest sense of the word. He didn't want to acknowledge something that even he still didn't know how to deal with.

"All right," I acquiesced, "but you're going to tell me one day."

He finally looked at me but said nothing.

I moved forward, grinning widely. "So, I hope you have a plan on getting us out of here, Squall. I don't really want to spend the rest of my life in prison."

Squall looked at the Moombas and smiled.


	15. Chapter 15

Fifteen - Seifer POV

The furry little lions led us out of the docking station, all the while doing an odd little dance around Squall's legs. Judging by their chirps of "Laguna!", they were quite excited to see him and just as excited to be helpful. They still seemed obnoxiously loud, even over the sound of the alarm going off. Squall mentioned that the alarm was sounding because Zell and the others were finally making their move, giving us a time limit to reach our destination.

 _Guess I don't have to worry about asking Squall what his dad's name is._ I thought, grimly looking at Squall's tense back. I kept my mouth shut as I followed him, ducking down to avoid the gazes of the guards even as the Moombas went to distract them. When we reached the top floor, Squall thanked the Moombas for their help and sent them on their way, telling them that they should think about leaving very soon.

When we were alone, I looked at Squall and asked, "So, I don't see how this is going to get us out of here."

"We're not leaving yet." He said quietly. "Zell, Irvine, and the girls should be coming up here soon, looking for us."

"They won't check the torture chamber?"

Squall jerked his thumb back over his shoulder, toward a door recessed in the far wall. "That's the torture chamber."

I cursed softly. "So now we just wait?"

"And prepare. We're in the D-District Prison, which is in the middle of the Galbadia Desert. To keep us from leaving, they're going to submerge the place."

"Shit, they mean business, don't they?"

Squall regarded me with a level stare. "People were more afraid of the sorceress than they were you."

I bared my teeth, not liking that comment at all. It made me sound like I was a fuzzy bunny rabbit compared to the scary monster that the sorceress was. Of course, the sorceress was Ultimecia, a woman hell-bent on destroying everything we held dear and loved. I cursed softly, folding my arms over my chest.

Squall moved toward me, reaching up to grasp the back of my neck. I looked down at him, startled, and my eyes widened even more as he pressed his lips to mine. The kiss was unyielding but not demanding, a simple contact. I pulled him closer, keeping my hands on his waist for a minute before curving them around his back. Then I felt a foreign brush against my mind. "Squall-"

"Let them in." he ordered, his voice low.

I shivered at his tone, at the emotions contained within those three simple words. So I crushed my mouth against his again and let yet more Guardian Forces into my mind. Three came over this time: Diablos, Cerberus, and Ifrit. They made themselves comfortable in my mind alongside Carbuncle, who crooned happily upon seeing his friends.

Squall pulled back from me then, his stormy eyes looking a bit bright. "They've agreed to protect you." he said. "If you don't utilize them, they'll utilize themselves."

I licked my lips and didn't release Squall right away. I grinned down at him. "I henceforth declare that junction exchanges between you and me will forever take place like that."

He narrowed his eyes at me, but the corners of his mouth twitched. He pushed me away a minute before we heard voices and footsteps. I leaned back against the wall, assuming a nonchalant position as I tried to arrange the demons in my mind to best serve me. Cerberus was all too willing to go along with what I said, his tail swinging from side to side as I worked on junctioning them to me. Diablos was a little more aloof, quietly accepting his role. Ifrit, however, seemed displeased with the whole situation.

 _I can't believe I'm stuck with you._ Ifrit growled.

 _Whine all you want, but Ice Prince over there made the choice. You're stuck with me until Squall says otherwise._ I replied, rather enjoying the flame Guardian Force's discomfort.

"Squall!"

I looked up at the cry of the Ice Prince's name, and watched as Rinoa climbed the last few stairs. She ran to him and flung her arms around him in a tight hug. Squall reflexively closed his arms around her as he staggered back a bit, and I would've felt jealous had he not slashed me a glare that had enough bite to make me smirk in response. Behind Rinoa came Irvine, Zell, Selphie, and Quistis. They all paused when they saw me, a range of emotions flicking across all of their faces. In that moment, I realized what the other me would've ended up dealing with, had he survived the Time Compression that had sent Squall back here. Seeing the shock, disgust, distrust, and outright angry hate in their expressions, I knew that I had seriously fucked up whatever relationships I had (or might've had) with people that I had known my entire life. Whatever we had been before I had become the sorceress' knight, it had changed drastically between the time I had gone with Edea and the time Squall rescued me. They didn't trust me anymore, if they had even trusted me in the first place.

"Seifer! You're okay!" Rinoa cried, releasing Squall to fling her arms around me in a tight hug. "Everyone said you'd died, but then you were right there, and I was just so happy!"

I hugged her back, flicking a glance toward Squall as I did so. He was already speaking to the other SeeDs, accepting back Lion Heart from Zell and taking Hyperion for me. I let Rinoa go with a soft push backwards. "I'm fine, sweetheart." I told her, smiling. "Squall saved my sad ass and made me realize a few things."

She looked at me with a confused kitten expression and pursed her lips. "What are those things?"

"They're for me to know and you never to find out."

Her eyes narrowed and she punched me in my arm. Before there could be any more violence, Squall turned to us and tilted his head toward the other door in the room. "We're leaving." he said, his voice quiet. "They'll try to submerge the place to prevent us from escaping, so we need to get out as fast as we can." He tossed me Hyperion and pointed at my chest. "Seifer, you take Rinoa, Irvine, and Quistis with you across first. Selphie, Zell, and I will bring up the rear and deal with anything that comes at us."

"Whoa, whoa, wait just a minute," Zell said suddenly, pointing at me. "Why is _he_ the leader all of a sudden, huh? Squall, did you forget that he was _working_ with Sorceress Edea?"

I opened my mouth to retort, but Squall coldly and smoothly interjected himself between my verbal tirade and Zell. "I haven't forgotten anything. In fact, I'm counting on anyone Seifer encounters believing he's _still_ working with the sorceress. If word hasn't gotten around yet, then Seifer might be able to get by without conflict."

Zell blinked, his mouth slightly open. "Didn't think about that, didja, chicken-wuss?" I said, grinning lazily. Zell cast a glare at me and clenched his fists.

"Go." Squall said, the word an order as much as it was an exasperated sigh.

I gathered my team and headed out onto the outside platform. Ahead of us was a metal walkway heading toward another section of the prison. I whistled lowly at the sight of the massive sea of sand in all the directions I looked, then eased out a little further, making sure that I was the first one anyone saw. I could still hear the siren blaring below us in the bowels of the prison. Even when I was out in the open, I couldn't see or hear anything except the muted siren and the hot sun making heat mirages in the desert far below.

"Okay," I said, gesturing with Hyperion toward the bridge. "Let's get going."

We started across, ready for anything that might come at us. Apparently, Squall's theory about the guards here still thinking I was on their side was holding up, at least until my team was halfway across the bridge. I heard Rinoa gasp as the machine came at us, but it and the soldiers it was carrying flew over our heads. I thought I faintly heard someone yell "Keep going! We'll stop 'em!" and glanced over my shoulder to see Squall's group engage the enemy. I herded my group further down the bridge, making it safely to the other side. I turned to watch Squall take out the machine and the two guards with it, then start running across the walkway. Selphie and Zell made it across just as the walkway started to retract. I cursed loud and long as I watched Squall make a heart-in-throat leap toward the edge of the walkway. He caught the barest of fingerholds with a practiced ease and began to shimmy his way toward us. When he reached us, I offered my hand to him, pulling him up with the rest of us.

The prison dug its way into the earth, leaving us topside and anyone else trapped below. Squall led us into a garage and said nothing as he entered one of the waiting vehicles. I joined him, and so did Irvine and Zell. The girls apparently had commandeered the yellow car and had already driven away.

We stopped at a crossroads and got out. Squall almost immediately turned his back on us and focused somewhere in the distance, his gaze somewhere between the horizon and the sky. Before I could ask what he was looking for - and already deciding I wouldn't like the answer - Quistis burst out, "The sorceress is about to launch missiles at Garden?!"

"That's what Rinoa heard from Irvine!" Selphie replied, her voice tight with panic.

I clenched my teeth as Squall's shoulders tensed. _Yep. Knew I wouldn't fucking like it._ I approached Squall and glanced at him out of the corner of my eye. Judging by the tenseness of his body and the emotionless mask he was wearing, he really didn't want my two cents, but he glanced up at me and canted his head to the side in askance.

"You do what you have to do." I said.

"Do you think you can handle it?" he asked me softly.

The question shouldn't have thrown me like it did, mostly because Squall had told me about this part already. At first I thought he was asking me if I could handle being the one responsible for the missiles' launch, but then I realized he was asking me if I could handle being in charge of _stopping_ it. A lazy, confident smile spread across my face. Squall's expression didn't change, but his eyes became a little warmer.

He turned to face the rest of the group. "We're going to split up here. One group will go to the Galbadia Missile Base and the other will return to Balamb Garden to warn the students."

"Who's going to be on which team?" Quistis asked.

Squall tilted his head slightly. "Seeing as I'm the leader, I will return to Balamb. The leader for the missile base team will be-"

Before he could decide, Selphie let out a cry of impotent rage and disappointment. We all turned to watch a stream of missiles shoot off into the sky, vanishing from sight. I ground my teeth and clenched my fists against my thighs.

Irvine's voice was soft as he said, "I... heard they were hitting Trabia first, and then Balamb."

Tears were streaming down Selphie's face, and her hands were clenched against her stomach, as if she was going to be sick. "Trabia... I'm sorry... I couldn't stop it... Please let everybody be all right. Please... That was a miss... right? Squall-"

"Selphie." Squall's voice was authoritative, a soft thunder that made her freeze even though tears still streamed down her face. "Trabia will be fine. You will lead the missile base team. With you, you'll have Seifer and Quistis. Everyone else will come with me."

Both Selphie and Quistis looked at me, but I didn't see distrust or hate in their eyes. There was only a steely determination in Quistis' gaze, and fiery retribution in Selphie's.

Squall continued, "This mission is unlike any other. It's not an order or a request from anyone. Selphie, make sure you come back in one piece. You two support her."

Selphie rubbed her cheeks and eyes dry and grinned brightly. "Don't worry about us. If we take this Galbadia army vehicle, we should be able to make it inside the base. I'll figure the rest out from there. Do you think that'd be okay? I'm sorry... I mean, thanks! There isn't much time! You better hurry to Balamb Garden!"

Squall nodded. He didn't even spare me a glance as he turned to walk away. "See you at Balamb Garden."


	16. Chapter 16

Sixteen - Seifer POV

Our car rolled into the base and stopped at the checkpoint. We all held our breath as the guard there studied us for several tense minutes.

"Alright, go ahead." the guard said, waving us past.

I saw Selphie visibly relax at that. We drove through into the missile base without any incident. When we parked and got out, I noticed Selphie begin to pull at the Galbadia military uniform she was wearing. I was glad my face was covered only because I was grinning widely imagining the look of pure disgust/horror on her face. So sue me, I was being childish.

Despite Squall's confidence, we hadn't been completely sure that my presence would get us into the base without questions being sent up the chain of command, Quistis had decided that we would dress in the uniforms to disguise ourselves. Since Selphie had agreed - and since I was in the right frame of mind to understand Squall would kick my ass from here to this Esthar place if I didn't obey the orders of my leader - I hadn't argued with it. It must've surprised Quistis that I was keeping my mouth shut, since she kept giving me furtive glances while Selphie handed out the uniforms.

Let me tell you, it was a challenge _not_ to peek at the girls while they changed into their disguises. I could hear my Ifrit and Diablos grumbling about not being able to have any fun, and Cerberus and Carbuncle were confused by what that meant. I wasn't going to oblige them by explaining, mostly because I doubted that they'd still understand that there were two naked girls behind me and I was pointedly keeping my eyes forward. When it was my turn to change, I did it quickly, and I was pretty sure Selphie had gotten a glimpse of my ass, because her cheeks had turned a healthy shade of pink before she pulled her helmet on.

"Following the launch on Trabia Garden, prepare for the launch on Balamb Garden. All personnel, take your positions." intoned a voice, crackling over the loudspeaker.

"When is launch time?" Quistis asked, keeping her voice low.

Selphie stamped her foot. "It doesn't matter! We have to stop the missiles! That's all there is to it, right?! If there's a door, we go in! If there's anything we can break, we break! And in the end, we blow this place to smithereens!"

"Well," I said, "let's do it."

"Let's get a move on!" Selphie punched the air, striking a pose. I was certainly glad that no one was around to see her do it, because she was giving us away with every movement. She quickly led us to the nearest door and through it. We entered a small room that had another door, no doubt leading deeper into the missile base, but-

"It's LOCKED!" Selphie shrieked. She focused on the panel beside the door. "Insert ID card!? But... we don't have one!"

I grabbed her shoulder to keep her from going into a full-on tantrum. "Selphie, calm down." When she turned to look at me, I blew out a sigh. "Stop yelling. We're in disguise here. We can't be drawing attention to ourselves, or we'll be caught."

 _It doesn't matter in the end, anyway._ Ifrit grumbled.

 _Shut up._ I growled at the flame GF. _I don't need the peanut gallery giving me an anxiety attack._

Ifrit growled back at me. _If Leonhart didn't care about you so much-_

 _What? What would you do? Manifest yourself and burn the place to the ground? How would that help Squall?_

Ifrit seethed for a moment, then receded from my immediate consciousness. Damn Leonhart for being so buddy-buddy with these goddamn demons. They barely listened to the rest of us, but they fell over backwards for him.

Quistis held out her hand then, maybe to stop me from berating Selphie even more. "I found this in the car. Maybe it'll work?"

Selphie took the ID card from Quistis and I let her go. I watched her put the card in the slot, and we all stood there without breathing for fear something might go wrong. But the computer whirred and beeped, and then there was the sound of a lock turning.

"Verifying..." the computer voice intoned. "Access granted..."

"Whoo-hoo!" Selphie crowed.

I shook my head. _I guess nothing will change her. I wonder if Squall put me with her to test my patience. I know he figured my being here would allow us to move faster, but... for the love of Hyne, I'm going to get my revenge on that man._ I followed Selphie and Quistis in, only to nearly run into them when Selphie stopped short on the walkway. Ahead of us, a guard stood rigid by a door. He hadn't noticed us yet, but we needed to act fast. I couldn't give Selphie any cues and neither could Quistis, not unless we wanted to give ourselves away.

"It might look suspicious if we're uptight," Selphie said in a soft whisper, "so let's just act casual!"

With her leading the way, we kept a slow, sedate pace as we walked single-file past the guard. We were halfway down the walkway when the guard barked, "Hey! You! Stop right there!"

I tensed, ready to grab Hyperion and silence the guard forever. Even Selphie and Quistis seemed ready to attack first and ask questions later.

"Hah!" the guard continued. "Walking in a single file... Your parents must have raised you well. That's very good manners! Always be thankful to your parents for bringing you up!"

"Yes, sir..." Selphie responded. I could hear in her voice how confused she was, and how much she thought the guard was an idiot.

"I like how he assumes we have parents," I said softly.

Quistis smiled, and she probably would've laughed if we weren't still within earshot of the guard. "Of course we have parents. But they didn't raise us. And all lessons in manners were lost on you, Seifer."

"Hey, I listen to who I feel like listening to."

"So you just _feel like_ listening to Squall?"

"He has a nicer ass than any of my other commanders." I replied in a deadpan. Both Selphie and Quistis stared at me with their mouths hanging slightly open. I kept a straight face, knowing that if I so much as twitched my lip, they'd figure I was being facetious.

"That explains soooo much," Selphie said softly.

"What?" I asked, confused and wary at the same time.

"Nothing! Come on! We have a mission!"

I glowered at Selphie's back as she marched us into another room where there were more guards standing at attendance. I couldn't pin her to the wall and demand what she meant, not when we were on a relatively tight timetable. We spent a good twenty minutes running back and forth across the base, delivering messages from one group of soldiers to another and back again. At last we found ourselves heading back toward the first guard, and as soon as we delivered our message to him, we entered into the circuit room.

Selphie went immediately to the giant console on the far wall, while Quistis stood guard by the door. I watched Selphie punch buttons randomly, frowning as nothing happened. I stepped up beside her, leaning my hand on the console. She tensed under my closeness, and meekly looked up at me.

"What do you mean, 'it explains soooooo much'?" I asked with barely disguised malevolence to my words.

Her throat worked as she swallowed. "Uh, well, you know..."

"No, I _don't_ know." I growled. "So why don't you explain it to me?"

"Uh, well. I don't really know Squall all that well, you know. But the way Quistis and Zell were talking about him told me that they did, and, uh, you know, they said he was different. More serious. Waaaay more talkative, too. It was like he was a different person."

Well. I blinked, glancing toward Quistis before I focused on Selphie again. _Looks like the kids are more observant than Squall figured they were._ I was going to have to mention it to him when we got back. Either he was going to have to come clean and drop the facade he was trying to present to the world, or he was going to have to change the way he acted subtlety enough that it would look like a natural transition.

"And," Selphie continued, focusing on pressing random buttons again so she didn't have to look at me, "from what they said about _you_ , you _hate_ Squall. Or at least do whatever you can to make his life a living hell. Bullying him and stuff like that."

"We're rivals." I said.

 _Can't say he's your lover yet, can you?_ Ifrit chortled. _You haven't even gotten to second base with him._

 _I don't want to know how you know the term 'second base'._ I responded.

 _Is he your boyfriend then?_ Carbuncle asked, bouncing from paw to paw. He sounded proud of himself for knowing the word 'boyfriend'.

Hyne bless the furry little creature's heart, because his innocence smoothed the edges of my fraying temper. I was still going to ask Squall to give me someone other than Ifrit, though, because sure as shit we weren't getting along.

"Well, whatever you are," Selphie was saying, completely ignorant of my internal argument with the Guardian Forces Squall had lent me, "you two are totally different with each other now. Quistis and the others couldn't figure out why, but Rinoa and I had a theory, so we talked about it privately, and we decided that there's gotta be a certain reason why you and him aren't at each others' throats anymore and it wasn't because he was the leader."

Quite certain I really didn't want to know what insight Rinoa had into my relationship with Squall, and quite certain I was being masochistic by bulling ahead anyway, I asked, "So what did you two decide?"

"That you two being rivals was something everyone else decided on, and you two were just displaying your love for one another in the only way you two really knew how and that Squall could only be dominant to you if he was in a position of power, which he is, 'cause he's our leader, and so there had to be a good reason for you not to challenge him in that position, which there is, if you're constantly staring at his ass." Selphie beamed up at me, so utterly proud of herself and Rinoa for figuring out our apparent 'game'.

I don't know if it was temper or pure surprise that made me do it, but I punched the console as hard as I could. Selphie squeaked breathily and jumped back as the lights on the console flashed before the room's power suddenly shut off, immersing us in darkness.

"Uh, Seifer? You okay?" Selphie asked, concerned.

"Yeah. I'm fine." I reached out to grip Selphie's shoulder, making her tense. I made sure my face was close to hers as I hissed, "You will _not_ tell anyone else. You got me?"

"Loud and clear." Selphie squeaked. "But... can I at least tell Rinoa? She's gonna owe me sooooooo much gil."


	17. Chapter 17

Seventeen - Seifer POV

I blew out a sigh and released Selphie. I really shouldn't have put it past the princess to make bets on my relationship with Squall if she'd figured out this much just by observation. Taking my silence as an apparent affirmative answer, Selphie just grinned.

"Um, it would look really bad if they found us here... We should leave this room now." Quistis said.

"Alright!" Selphie grinned wider. "NEXT!"

As we left the room, the maintenance crew that had sent us here in the first place showed up, immediately grilling us with questions. Playing it cool, Selphie said, "We were just about to go call on you!"

"Alright, then. Let us take care of it!"

We exchanged glances, then followed the soldiers into the room. It took us only a few seconds to incapacitate them and ensure that they wouldn't be going anywhere or doing anything for a while. That done, we headed back down the walkway, where we were stopped by another soldier looking for help with his task since the power had shut down. Since we didn't want to give ourselves away until the crucial moment, we chose to help the soldier in his task. He led us into a missile silo room, instructing us to help two other men push a silo into place. It was harder than it looked, and I was sure I was using muscles that I hadn't used in a long time trying to push that thing into place. When we managed to do it, we were given another task of confirming the coordinates on the control panel. Selphie was practically skipping as we headed to the control panel, and I was pretty sure she was already imagining blowing this place sky-high. When we reached it, Selphie's fingers flew over the keys bringing up the program.

"Okay," said Quistis, "what should we do?"

"Let's just smash it." I said. "I mean, all situations can be solved with the right application of force and the destruction of machinery."

Selphie grinned, apparently liking that idea. But then her smile faltered, and she looked from Quistis to me and then to the screen before her. "It'll be a mega bummer if _we_ launch the missiles by mistake. So, should we hold back a little and just mess around with it a bit?"

That idea hadn't made itself clear to me until she said it. If we launched the missiles by mistake, they'd fly straight for Balamb, and Squall would have no chance to do whatever it was he was going to do. Not only that, it would alert all the soldiers on the missile base that someone was here that shouldn't be, and we could easily be overwhelmed by numbers. Guardian Forces be damned, some things just can't be won by brute force, even if you'd really wish they could.

"Yeah, good idea." Quistis answered. I nodded my answer.

I watched Selphie bring up the error ratio program and sent it into the high numbers, ensuring that the missiles would have a near one hundred percent chance of never hitting Balamb Garden in the first place. We waited, tense, as she uploaded the change for each missile silo. When it was complete, we headed toward the guard at the bottom of the stairs nearby.

He stopped us before we even set foot on the first stair. "This place is off-limits. You're not allowed up here."

"But we've come to report on the missile coordinate data." Selphie said.

The guard eyed us for a minute, then waved us by. "Oh, very well. Go right ahead."

We headed up the stairs, and I glanced over my shoulder to see the guard rubbing his chin with his head cocked to one side. Whatever he was thinking about, it wasn't enough to stop us, and it wasn't enough to sound the alarm.

When we entered the control center, the soldiers were already underway for the launch. Two sat at the computer, fingers tapping keys as another, one I figured was the officer in charge, was barking orders at them. A voice came over the loudspeaker: "Attention. This is the control room. We are now entering the final phase of the missile launch. Take your designated positions and prepare for the launch!"

My stomach did a funny little twist. Had we done enough? Had we done too little? Would Squall be able to get Garden away safely? Would he be able to even get there in time? All those questions whirled around in my head for a while, at least until the officer noticed us. Then all the questions, all the doubts, faded into the background of my mind, and I felt my adrenaline starting to pump through my system. There was going to be a fight soon. I could sense it.

"Huh?" said the officer. "What are you doing in here?"

Selphie saluted in the SeeD fashion. "We've come to report on the missile coordinates!"

"Oh." The officer eyed us, his chin dipping down as he looked us from toe to head and back again. "Don't move!" he shouted suddenly. "I thought you looked suspicious. You're the intruders! No use hiding it now! That salute you just did was completely wrong!"

 _About damn time._ Ifrit snarled, and for once I agreed with the demon. I was grateful to finally get out of that Galbadian uniform and I brought Hyperion to my hand, ready to battle.

"TA-DAH!" Selphie practically struck a pose as she said the word. "Hooooo, finally. This military uniform is itchy, and it stinks!"

"That'll teach you to go putting on someone else's clothes." I joked.

Selphie shot me a glare, but she didn't have time to retort as we were soon engaged in battle. It felt good to let loose, to feel the thrum of adrenaline coursing through my veins again. I'd been cooped up playing the good little SeeD for too long (never mind that I wasn't actually a SeeD) and I had been itching for a chance to fight. With Selphie acting as our medic and occasional damage-dealer, Quistis and I were able to bring the soldiers down easily. Not that they were a match for us; I probably could've taken them on by myself and come away unscathed. I made sure that the soldiers I put down would never get back up again, and I may have let Ifrit have a little too much freedom. The Guardian Force gleefully rained hellfire down upon the soldiers' heads, bringing no shortage of misery and pain to them before the end.

When it was over, we were standing with bodies strewn around us, and a missile launch waiting for the final command.

"Okay then!" Selphie grinned. "Let's stop the missiles, blow the base to smithereens, and get outta here!"

Quistis moved toward the console to our left and studied the buttons. "One of these control panels should be the launch control mechanism."

"Well, what are we waiting for?" I asked, already moving toward another console. "Let's split up and look."

It was a few minutes of frantic searching - we didn't touch; by unspoken agreement we didn't want to accidentally launch the missiles - before Selphie hit paydirt. She practically danced a little jig before she began pushing buttons. When she ensured that the launch would never happen, we hunted for the self-destruct mechanism, which we found in another room. She set the timer for ten minutes, and with a wild grin directed at me and Quistis, she hurried out of the room. We were right behind her. Ten minutes sounded like quite a bit of time, but in reality, it wasn't that long at all. As we reached the door that would take us outside and to freedom, I felt the floor under my feet vibrate and I caught Quistis as the vibration upset her balance. I steadied her, frowning.

 _What the hell was that?_ I asked, knowing that the demons inside my mind knew exactly what I meant.

Selphie echoed my thought aloud. "Huh? Heeey? What was that noise?"

Diablos' sepulchral laugh echoed through my mind. _Run. Run as fast as you can._

 _It still won't matter._ Ifrit told the bat-like GF. _The most they can do is try to survive._

 _Stop talking like I can't hear you._ I growled, chasing after Selphie and Quistis. As we exited the base, I noticed that the soldiers were fleeing the base, having been alerted to the self-destruct timer. But the worst part wasn't the fleeing soldiers; it was the giant robot ahead of us, blocking the only exit. We had no choice but to engage it if we had any hope of getting out of the missile base alive. _Have I mentioned how much I hate you?_

 _Several times,_ chirped Carbuncle, _and in varying degrees of anger._

The stupid machine was between me and Squall. It was going down. The three of us unleashed everything we had upon the robot, knowing we only had a limited amount of time before the base went up in flames, and us with it. It was a hard battle, mostly because my gunblade was useless against the machine. In fact, all of our weapons were pretty much useless, hitting the metal shell and maybe causing a dent or a scratch here or there. Quistis switched to magic, pounding the machine with high-level spells of lightning. Selphie did the same, although she also added healing spells to her repertoire, keeping us from keeling over dead. I mainly focused on attacking, calling Ifrit and Diablos into battle as long as they could sustain it, since Selphie's heals didn't affect them like they did me, their vessel. I knew that if a GF died in battle it stayed dead unless we had a revive potion designed especially for them, and since Squall hadn't given me any of those, I knew I needed to use my GFs sparingly. Sparingly in the sense that if they got low in health, not to use them anymore. Had I been feeling vindictive against him, I might've let Ifrit bite it, but then the GF wasn't technically mine to treat that way. He was Squall's, and he was as powerful as Squall was.

He knew my thoughts anyway, and purposefully delayed his appearances, driving our time limit down into the dangerous area. At last the robot exploded into pieces, rolling backwards as smoke and flames billowed out of its shell. The soldiers within climbed from the wreckage, bravely - or stupidly - facing us. It was a death wish I eagerly granted, tearing their lives away with Hyperion's blade.

When it was over, Selphie and Quistis began to frantically look for a way out. The machine's husk blocked the exit, preventing us from leaving the base. I closed my eyes, breathing in the smoke and knowing the time limit was running out.

Quistis let out a helpless laugh. "It came quietly. I thought the end would have been more dramatic..."

I opened my eyes and looked at her, then looked at Selphie. She wasn't hyperactive now, but rather sad and pensive. Her eyes darted from the husk of the machine to the fence, then to the sky. She crouched, wrapping her arms around her knees as her eyes watered. For a minute, I thought she was actually going to start crying, but then she blinked the tears away, rising abruptly. She looked at me and smiled.

I smiled back. "We'll be just fine."

Quistis looked at me. "How can you be so sure? We're trapped here! We're going to die, Seifer."

"Squall wouldn't have sent us here, intending for us to die." I retorted, pointing at her. "Squall believed in us to get the job done and we have. He also is trusting us to get home alive, and we will, damn it."

"How?"

I focused my eyes in a particular direction. Selphie and Quistis followed my gaze, then gave me startled looks. I only smiled.

Then the base exploded.


	18. Chapter 18

Eighteen - Squall POV

Balamb had been much as I expected it to be when we arrived home: in a complete state of chaos as the Garden Faculty faced off against the SeeDs "loyal" to Cid. I didn't bother answering any questions - I plowed right through the monsters and anyone who opposed me, and headed straight for the middle ring of the Garden. There, I sent Fujin and Raijin to warn everyone about the missiles' inevitable arrival, and then I sent Zell and Irvine to find the Headmaster. Once they were off running that mission - and I had made it clear to them that they were to search everywhere, instead of telling them that Cid was in his office - I took Rinoa with me to the elevator. I still had the key with me from Before, so with her in tow, I headed down to the MD level. Taking the elevator early, I had avoided having to climb out of it when the power shut off.

Between the two of us, we managed to get the Garden into its mobile mode. Rinoa was grinning like a loon by the time Zell and Irvine managed to join us - apparently, they worked faster than we had Before... or they had just gotten lazy and had decided to check the obvious first - and as much as Zell pestered her about her "date" with me, she remained tight-lipped and only shrugged when he asked her more personal questions. I ignored them all, even Cid, as I took control of the newly mobile Garden and steered her out of the way of the incoming missiles. That done, I relinquished control of Balamb Garden to the ocean, knowing it would be some time before we reached our crash course with Fisherman's Horizon.

There was one more thing I would have to take care of before then, too.

Well.

Besides taking a well-deserved nap.

I made sure to lock my door, too.

After giving Rinoa her desired tour (and this time I was a little more engaged about it, considering she was going to need to know her way around Garden when shit hit the fan), I knew what was coming. I was feeling a little more amicable toward Cid this time around, so I said nothing during his tirade against NORG, and I merely nodded when he addressed me personally. I didn't bother to remind him of my report; I was sure he'd ask me eventually, and I had more important things to worry about. I did tell him, however, that Dr. Kadowaki was looking for him.

I wasn't feeling too generous with NORG though.

I let the Shumi talk, gave my report when asked, and barely reacted when NORG informed us that we would be the sacrifices used to calm the sorceress' anger. I let him enjoy his moment of triumph as he revealed Cid's secret, and I let him think we would just roll over and die to save his own skin. Rinoa and Zell, who had joined us minutes after Cid had left, looked at me with wide, fear-filled eyes. I ignored them, merely canting my head to one side.

"Do you really think I'll just let you use us to save your own skin?" I asked NORG in a voice so soft it was thunderous. "Do you think I've gone through all this just to bow my head to a fat Shumi who failed in the eyes of his people?"

 _That_ made NORG regard me fearfully. Since I was expecting the battle, I went into it with Renzokuken ready to go. Zell and Rinoa were helpful only in the fact that they managed to keep NORG from using any of his pod's attacks on us, while I focused on him to the exclusion of everything else.

After it was over, at Rinoa's insistence, we went to find Cid in the infirmary. I summarily made my report, and listened to him explain his side of the story. Since I had told Ellone to head to Esthar when I had met her for the "first" time, I wasn't expecting the White SeeD ship to show up, so I headed back to my room to try and get some rest. I knew that, by now, Seifer, Quistis, and Selphie were on their way to Fisherman's Horizon in the machine that had blocked them from escaping the missile base. I still worried that they hadn't made it, of course - Seifer could be extremely stubborn when he wanted to be - or that something had gone wrong and I had gotten them all killed this time around. I didn't get much sleep because of it, falling into waking nightmares of fire and blood. Whether I was rested or not, I knew that I was going to have to deal with my next challenge sooner rather than later.

Which was, by some miracle, preventing Garden from slamming into Fisherman's Horizon.

I was standing in FH now, overlooking the mayor's house. Rinoa was standing nearby, watching me. Since I had avoided a collision with FH, there really was no need to talk to the mayor, but Cid had cornered me into doing it anyway. Said that I needed to see the world and broaden my horizons. High expectations. SeeD is not just a special force for combat. I didn't argue. It probably wouldn't hurt to go tell the mayor that we came in peace and the big floating military base wasn't going to suddenly start bombing the pacifist city. I was almost tempted to warn him that Galbadia was going to come in guns blazing, so to speak, but I knew where that would get me.

Pacifists are crazy.

I had already warned Rinoa and Zell not to engage in any violence, and that was reiterated by the two elevator guards. I stayed quiet as one of them talked about Esthar, knowing at some point in my future we'd be heading there, whether I wanted to or not.

"Keep frowning like that and you'll get premature wrinkles."

I glanced at Rinoa. She had silently approached me and was standing beside me, slightly leaned over so she could look up at my face. She smiled as I looked away.

"You know, you're going to have to make a decision sooner or later." she said.

"Or I could keep standing here." I replied, hoping I put enough lemon in my words to get her to back off.

"Or you could do that." Rinoa agreed. "But it would be dreadfully boring, and we have to go see him anyway right? That's what Mister Cid said."

"Yeah."

Her slight smile dropped into a serious expression. "Squall, are you okay? I mean, like really okay? I know you haven't slept in a little while, what with all the excitement, but that doesn't explain why you're suddenly so stoic with people who are your friends."

I glanced at her, confused. Stoic? I thought about it for a moment. "I have a lot on my mind."

"I figured." She edged a bit closer, then set her hand on my arm. It took effort not to jerk under that touch. "Look, I'm going to go all sappy on you right now but, you can talk to me, you know. It's not good to keep all that stress bottled up inside. Believe me, Seifer would do the same thing and then just suddenly explode. Not that I think you'd explode."

My lips twitched.

Rinoa took that as a good sign. "And I'm not saying this as like, a come-on, but because you're my friend. You'll go crazy if you keep all that stress bottled up inside you."

Now I really smiled. Here was the girl I knew from Before, the one who wasn't a ditz but a sensitive, caring young woman. I just shook my head, though, only because what I was keeping bottled up inside wasn't something I wanted her to know. I had told Seifer for a purpose; telling anyone else would only cause more undue stress and perhaps someone else trying to change the timeline. But, knowing her as I did, she wouldn't let the subject drop without a satisfactory answer. So I said, "I'm just worried."

"Worried?"

"About Selphie and the others."

Rinoa's gaze softened and so did her smile. "I'm sure they're fine. You're a good leader, Squall. You wouldn't have sent them if you didn't believe they wouldn't get the job done and that they'd come back to us."

I inclined my head and made a gesture toward the mayor's house. "Shall we get going? The sooner we introduce ourselves, the sooner we can go around town."

"Sounds good."

I ushered Rinoa down ahead of me, and Zell and Irvine fell in behind, and together we walked to the mayor's house. I wasn't surprised to see Martine sitting there, and nothing would've given me more pleasure than to push that son of a bitch off the platform, but I ignored him and headed into Mayor Dobe's house.

The meeting was short and to the point. Because the Garden hadn't crashed into FH this time, it didn't need any repairs, but that also meant there would be no one on board to teach Nida how to pilot it. To remedy this, I asked if Dobe would be opposed to having his technicians check the Garden out for problems. He agreed, if only because doing so would get us out of Fisherman's Horizon faster. That taken care of - along with getting Nida the piloting lessons he needed - I assured the mayor and his wife that we would leave as soon as the Garden was serviced and ready, but I refrained from promising that we wouldn't engage in any violence, considering I knew what was coming.

When we finally left the mayor's house, I headed back up the hill with Zell and Rinoa on my heels. I could hear Zell grumbling to Irvine about Dobe, and I let him. It was better he let it all out anyway rather than keep it inside. He'd get to take it out on Galbadian soldiers in a minute. That minute came faster than I had expected; I cut Flo off with an icy glare and watched the woman shrink back under my gaze. After that, we chased down the mayor, and managed to save his life (again) even though he would look upon us like we were trash. I wanted to tell him that his belief system was flawed, that if one had to choose between a belief and survival, one needed to choose survival. But I kept my mouth shut, and just fought, knowing that in just a minute, just one more minute, I would see Seifer again.

When he climbed up from the Iron Clad, I somehow restrained myself from rushing over to him and grabbing him in a tight hug. He looked right at me and gave me his most irritating smirk, as if to tell me he knew exactly what I was stopping myself from doing. Then his arms were full of Rinoa, and even Zell and Irvine rushed forward to exchange hugs with Selphie and Quistis. I felt my lips twitch in response to the sight before me, and judging by the way Seifer's eyes suddenly became more focused on my face, I realized he had never seen me truly smile before. He was committing it to his memory, as if me smiling was an event that occurred only when the stars and planets aligned.

I don't know if the feeling of joy I had at seeing all of them - Seifer included - had been diminished by the fact I _knew_ that they would survive, but I knew that I wasn't as excited as I had been Before.

"Hey, Ice Prince." Seifer called, grinning broadly, "you succeed?"

My smile vanished and I scowled at him for using the nickname he had for me. "The Garden is safe."

"Really!?" Selphie jumped in the air, punching her fists high above her head. "Whoo-hoo!"

I focused on Seifer as I asked, "What happened to you guys?"

Before Seifer could answer, Quistis stepped forward and frowned at me. "Squall, let's save that for later."

Seifer tilted his head to the side and glanced from Quistis to me and back again. I lifted my shoulders slightly in a shrug, and for once, Seifer smirked and nodded once to let me know he would let it go for now, but nothing he would tell me about the missile base would be something new. It would be what he learned while on the mission that would impress me, and I was fairly confident he knew it.

I glanced at Mayor Dobe, but he was already leering distrustfully at us, and I knew that whatever speech I could give him would do nothing to change his view about us. I sent the others on ahead back to the Garden and I moved over to the mayor, silently helping him to his feet. I met his hot glare with an icy one and I walked away, knowing he was staring at my back. Seifer was waiting for me on the tracks, his arms crossed over his chest. I didn't glance at him as I passed him, but even with my back turned, I knew he was focused on Dobe with as much intensity as he focused on me when we fought. After a minute, he caught up with me.

"You still think the world needs people like him?" Seifer asked.

I smirked. "I think the world needs all kind of people. But I'm not going to let someone walk up and kill me. I will fight first, and if it's my time, it's my time."

"Did you at least say thank you?"

"Would you?"

Seifer laughed in response and shook his head. "I don't know if having you know everything that's going to happen is a good thing or not, but you certainly know how to show a guy a good time."

I looked up at him through my bangs and was surprised to see his cheeks color a little bit. So I smiled a little and said, "I haven't even gotten started yet."

And then I walked away from him.

I heard Seifer splutter behind me, cursing in a rather colorful string as he followed me, and I couldn't help the pleased smile that bloomed on my face.


	19. Chapter 19

Nineteen - Squall POV

I wasn't surprised to find Irvine waiting for us after we got off the lift. I knew what he wanted to ask, but as I studied his face, I was somewhat surprised to see nervousness written across his features. I looked up at Seifer and tilted my head to one side. Reading my non-verbal cue, Seifer shrugged and walked past Irvine, leaving the two of us alone on the walkway. I was sure he'd want to know what Irvine had in mind, but it was something I could tell him about later. Irvine didn't need an audience right now. Frankly, I didn't need one either.

"The headmaster gave the okay to let the technicians in the Garden. They're in there right now." Irvine said, his gaze following Seifer's back.

"Okay." I responded, moving past him.

"Say..."

I paused, looking back over my shoulder at Irvine. "Yeah?"

Irvine rubbed the back of his neck and refused to meet my eyes. "Uh... I was wondering. Those technicians seem very handy. So like... would it be all right if I asked them to fix some other stuff?"

 _Fix what, exactly? The stage isn't broken._ Figuring I didn't really need to know, I shrugged as noncommittally as I could. "As long as it doesn't interfere in anything else, go ahead. Don't ask for too much. They're here to service the Garden, not build elaborate contraptions."

Irvine grinned widely. "Yeah, of course."

I nodded and headed toward the Garden. Irvine fell in one step to my left and behind, since the catwalk wasn't wide enough for us to move side by side. I knew his eyes were focused on my back, boring holes into it, as he waited for me to address him. I don't know why Irvine just wouldn't come out and say what he wanted to say, especially since he cared about Selphie so much. My duty as the group's leader and SeeD Commander ended after the battle was won; what they all did after hours was their business. Of course, I wasn't the SeeD Commander yet. That was coming shortly. I glanced at Irvine, hoping he would take the clue I was trying to give him, but he continued to smile as densely as ever. Ironically, it made me appreciate Seifer even more.

In the end, I allowed Irvine to take me down the quad and Selphie. Even after all this time, I still didn't know the best way to comfort her. I pointed out that the stage wasn't a complete mess and still looked functional. That earned a lip quirk from Selphie before her eyes watered, and I was left trying to make sure she didn't actually start crying. I had to finally give up and allowed Irvine to do what he was supposed to do, which was to cheer Selphie up and hatch the nefarious plan to get a band together to play in concert later that evening.

It was a concert I wasn't looking forward to.

For obvious reasons.

When Cid called me, I headed up to his office for my talk with him. I wasn't surprised to find Seifer waiting for me by the elevator, and I didn't dissuade him from following me, though I stopped him from following me into the office. I didn't need him staring at me while Cid made the announcement that would change my entire life. I made my report and prepared myself for what was coming. Cid took a minute to look me up and down, head to toe, before he began to speak. I barely listened. Before, I had felt he was being unfair. Before, I had wondered what had possessed Cid to think I could handle being responsible for hundreds of lives. That I wouldn't be affected terribly by those losses. That I wouldn't hate myself for making decisions that could potentially get someone killed, decisions that _had_ gotten people killed. That I would have the strength to kill his wife. To kill Seifer. But after living it once already, I know why Cid was giving it over to me - he thought I was strong enough to live with the consequences of my decisions and actions, because he certainly wasn't.

I didn't know then, and I didn't know now, what Cid was expecting from me. He was watching me with carefully guarded eyes, as if he was measuring each word before he spoke them. I remained achingly apathetic, and I'm sure that was giving him cause to worry. Even when he spoke of this being my destiny, I remained emotionless. I remembered how I had reacted the last time. I had flown completely off the handle, yelling until I was red in the face. In the end I had accepted it without much fight. But, now that I knew, and in a strange way, it _was_ my destiny. It had been me who had given Edea the idea of the SeeD and the Garden. I had started the whole thing, in trying to defeat Ultimecia the first time. The Time Compression had sent me back to the orphanage when I was five and I didn't know any better that I shouldn't meddle in fate's plan.

It was the soundest warning anyone could get, and I had blatantly ignored it.

I thanked Cid for my promotion, said that I hoped I could live up to his expectations, turned on my heel, and headed out of his office to the elevator.

Seifer followed me back to my room without a word. I was tempted to slam the door in his face, but that wouldn't solve anything except maybe get him wrangled by the rest of the group into "helping" with the concert. So I let him inside and pointed to the bed. He sat and I locked the door, ensuring that the two of us would be left alone. Then I leaned against the door and stared at my feet.

Seifer leaned back on his hands on my bed, his emerald eyes focused on my face. "So."

I tilted my head. I wasn't sure what I was going to say anyway.

"Back to the silent treatment already?"

I rolled my eyes and folded my arms over my chest. "When I first heard Cid's speech, and when I first got promoted, I freaked out on him. I yelled. I thought about quitting. But what would I have if I quit? And now I think, if I don't do it, who will?"

Seifer blew out a breath. "Cid dumps a whole shitpile in your lap, and you're just going to be the good Commander and take it, huh?"

"And who would you nominate to take it? No offense, Seifer, but I wouldn't vote for you."

"I wouldn't vote for me either."

"And no one would be able to do anything with the sort of conviction that I have."

"Of course not. No one knows what you do. Besides, you've already figured out what you're going to do. You've told me. Several times."

I inclined my head, and squeezed my arms tighter around myself.

Seifer's lips split into a lazy grin as he recognized the gesture for what it was. He shifted and pushed himself forward, leaning his elbows on his knees. He gestured for me to come closer, and I did. When I was in arms' reach, Seifer wrapped his arm around my hips and pulled me close. I set my forearms on his shoulders, locked my fingers together behind his neck, and looked down at him. For a while, we just stared at each other, and then Seifer moved one of his hands to reach up for my neck to pull me down for a kiss. Our lips touched, and I resisted his urging to let my knees buckle and collapse atop him. I pulled back and sighed.

Seifer frowned. "What is it?"

I looked up at the ceiling. "This isn't the time."

Seifer chuckled somewhat darkly, disappointment clear in his green eyes. "When will the time come, Ice Prince?"

I sighed. I didn't have an answer for him, and he knew it.

Seifer pulled me down to sit beside him on the bed. He wrapped an arm around my shoulder and pulled me close. I leaned my head on his shoulder, closing my eyes and breathing in his scent. I expected him to pull some sort of sneak attack, but he just kept stroking my hair in slow, gentle motions. Despite myself, I began to relax and my eyes began to close against my will.

"You know," Seifer said softly, bringing me back from the edge of sleep, "even if you did quit, you'd just get drawn back into it. You couldn't walk away now even if you wanted to. Your sense of duty wouldn't allow for anything less. Besides, everyone - and by everyone, I mean the Orphanage Gang - is counting on you to lead us through this. Besides, I think there's something you haven't taken into consideration."

I looked up at him. "What's that?"

"Two Knights are better than one."

I shook my head and sighed. "That's not something I'm worrying about right now. Our status as Knights doesn't matter if we don't have a sorceress to serve."

"But we will."

"If everything goes as planned, yes."

"Do you see how ironic the whole situation is now? Cid hands you the reins to everyone's fates, and you're manipulating events to suit your own designs."

I glowered at him and looked away.

Seifer resumed running his fingers through my hair. I knew he wanted to kiss me. He wanted to go further than that, too, if I would only let him. But I couldn't think about that right now. I couldn't indulge that selfish desire. There was too much I needed to focus on right now than him. Than that. If it happened, and I lost him... "If I could stop everything from happening... I'd do it." I said, hoping the words would distract him, or at least convince him to curb his own desire for the moment.

"I know." he replied, accepting my meaning but not liking it, and clearly intending to revisit the subject at some point. "But it's that responsibility thing. That thing I'm not very good with."

"You've done fine so far."

"Hate to break it to you, Squally-boy, but your opinion doesn't count."

I scoffed. "You say that now. Just wait until tonight."

"What does that mean?"

"You'll see."


	20. Chapter 20

Twenty - Seifer POV

I heard a polite knock at the door that probably would've turned violent if I had chosen to ignore it. I had considered it, especially when I looked down at the brunette curled against my side in a decidedly deep sleep. He'd let me kiss him and hold him, but he hadn't let me go any further than that. I contented myself with laying beside him while he slept, studying his face and features, smoothing back his hair when he shifted and locks of it fell over his face. I thought I understood his reasons to keep from getting closer, getting intimate, but every time I thought I could convince him otherwise, there was always that subtle shift away. He never moved away physically, just mentally. I knew he was stressed out about everything we had done, or what we were going to do, and all that stress would eventually break him. And I didn't want to see Squall broken.

Somehow, I managed to extricate myself from Squall and padded quietly over to the door. I unlocked it and opened it a crack, allowing myself to peek out at Rinoa. She was standing with her back to me, her hands clasped together at the small of her back. She was wearing her little yellow number, and I found myself wondering where she had stashed that since she'd worn it the night of the SeeD ball.

Not wanting to wake Squall, I slipped out into the hall and closed the door gently behind me. "Okay, princess," I started quietly, "what the hell is going on here?"

Rinoa turned to face me, doing a silly little pirouette that accented her in all the right ways. The grin she wore, however, kept certain things in check with a healthy dose of fear, because Rinoa didn't grin like that unless she had some nefarious plan that would get her and anyone helping her in a healthy dose of trouble. She struck a pose, pointing over my shoulder at Squall's door.

"I'm here for the Commander!" She had enough sense to keep her voice down, at least. Then her eyes narrowed slightly at me, and the grin shrank a little. "Unless... you've already decided he's not going to go?"

"Go? Go where?"

"Uh, the concert?"

"What con- You know what, never mind. I don't want to know."

Rinoa really did frown now. "Well, Quistis, Selphie, Zell, Irvine, and me put together this lovely little concert for Squall. You know, to celebrate his promotion and just have a little fun before the world goes to crap with war and stuff. I mean, we have to go save this Ellone girl from the sorceress, right? And we have to make sure the sorceress can't hurt any more people. I know Squall's got a lot on his shoulders, but we thought this would be good for him. A chance for him to unwind. Unless you and he..."

Getting her meaning by the pink stain to her cheeks, I blew out a sigh. "No. We didn't."

"Oh."

"Don't sound so disappointed, princess."

"No! I'm not!" Her cheeks turned redder as I stared at her. "I mean, I'm not disappointed. I just thought... you know."

"Squall is a very stubborn guy. If he doesn't want it, it doesn't happen."

"I'm sorry." Rinoa meant it, which surprised me. Then her eyes narrowed in thought for a minute, and her forefinger tapped her lips. "I got it! You go ahead and go down to FH. There's a stage set up before the mayor's house. Go wait there. I'll bring Squall, and then you can take it from there."

My mind stuttered to a halt. "Wait a damned minute. Are you trying to get some fan-service here?"

"A girl has needs. Boys have needs. It just so happens," Rinoa pointed at my chest, "that your needs and my needs coincide. I don't need much. Just a flash of skin."

I rubbed my face. "For fuck's sake, Rin..." If Squall found out, I was dead. Rinoa wouldn't be too far after me. I looked down at her, saw her smiling, and realized I had just been suckered.

She grinned wider. "Of _course_ I wouldn't watch! Jeez, Seifer, you are _so_ sensitive sometimes. Squall would kill me if he knew I watched him get a little. Besides," she oggled her eyes at me, "I already know what _you_ look like without all that on."

"I really hate you sometimes."

"So does that mean you'll do it?"

I rubbed my face again and blew out a sigh. "Fine. But Squall's sleeping right now. Don't wake him up."

Rinoa saluted me. It was the impish sort of salute, the one coupled with the expression of 'who, me?' that promised mischief before the day was out. I shook my head but headed toward the concert area as told. Whatever she was going to do it would be on her shoulders. If Squall killed her, I guess we'd find out real quick if it was going to be either Quistis or Selphie who would become the next sorceress. I headed down out of the Garden toward FH, and found my way to the center of the town. A huge stage had been erected there, and judging by Irvine's shit-eating grin, it had been by his request. I noticed Zell, Selphie, and Quistis were on stage, handling instruments like they were made of glass.

"Yo, Seifer."

I looked back over my shoulder to find Fujin and Raijin making their way down toward me. Fujin was focused on me, but Raijin was watching the stage with a look of pure confusion. I hadn't seen them since I had gotten back from the missile base, which was mostly my fault. I had focused on Squall, since he'd begun to get more and more tense about the events that were coming.

"Yo, yourselves." I replied when they stopped before me. "What's up?"

Raijin rubbed the back of his neck. "So, uh, we heard about what you did at the Galbadia Missile Base. Can't believe you talked Squall into lettin' you take on that kinda mission."

 _I didn't really talk him into letting me go. He gave me the rope and I swung instead of hanged._ I shrugged, smirking. "Yeah, well. Can't keep a good man down, right?"

Fujin rolled her one eye. "Why didn't you come see us?"

"I was busy?"

She scowled at me, but Raijin looked like he was about to accept my explanation. I hated that I couldn't tell them what Squall had told me, but I was sure they wouldn't believe me even if I did. What was I going to tell them anyway? That I had been the lapdog of an evil sorceress and they had been my goons, terrorizing Balamb and other people in order to find Ellone so Ultimecia could bring about the Time Compression and kill us all?

Fujin took a step closer to me and lightly bumped her fist against my chest. "Squall."

I looked down at her fist, realizing with some shock that her knuckles rested lightly against my heart. I met her gaze with a slight frown. "What about him?"

"I may have only one eye, Seifer, but I'm not stupid. There's something different about him. Something different about you." she said softly, probably to keep Raijin from hearing. He was staring at the stage anyway, jaw dropped in some kind of amazement. A quick glance told me Quistis was bending over to look at something.

Some guys, you know?

Fujin continued, "Whatever it is, I don't think it's bad. You two have always balanced each other. It doesn't surprise me, if it's come to _that_."

I swallowed hard and looked away from her, but I still saw the surprise in her crimson eye. It was quickly followed by a swift calculation, then a gentle smile teased her lips. I jabbed a finger toward her. "You will never say a word." I growled.

"Never." Fujin replied, still smiling. "But we are still a posse. I'll remind you of that, if I need to."

"Yeah, I know." I rubbed the back of my neck. I glanced toward the top of FH and saw Rinoa's back, her hands clasped behind her again as she leaned forward, speaking to someone. I saw Irvine and Selphie, too, which meant Squall was up there. I looked back at Fujin then, tilting my head to the side. "Some bad shit's gonna go down after today. While I'm dealing with the Ice Prince and the others, I need you two to be watching my back. I need you two to protect Garden."

Raijin looked at me with a wide, stupid grin. "Don't worry, Seifer. We always got your back, ya know?"

Fujin gave her boyfriend a long look before she returned her gaze to me. She nodded, reaching up to place her palm against my cheek in an incredibly sisterly way. "You do what you have to do, Seifer. Whatever happens, we've got you." She patted my cheek, then pointedly turned and walked away, dragging Raijin with her. I watched them go, then shook myself, letting out the breath I hadn't been aware I'd been holding.

 _What complicated relationships you humans have,_ Ifrit commented off-handedly. He was lounging somewhere near the back of my consciousness, not in the immediate forefront but not too far away either.

 _Is there a problem with that?_ I snapped back as I headed toward the edge of the platform. I scowled at the magazine there, recognizing Irvine's handiwork. I was tempted to kick it, but it was probably part of whatever plan he'd dreamt up to get Squall hooked up with Rinoa. I jumped down from there, landing as lightly as I could on the reflective panel.

 _No. Although I do find it amusing that your one-eyed friend there is far more observant than most._

 _Fujin's always been like that._

For as long as I'd known the one-eyed girl, Fujin had always seen more than anyone else ever had. She'd seen through my personal quirks to know what was a shield and what was genuine; she'd known before I had that Squall and I were destined to be rivals and she'd known before I had that I was going to break up with Rinoa. She probably had figured out Squall loved me before he'd bothered to tell me. She probably had figured out my feelings for Squall went beyond that of a rival now, without me needing to tell her.

I folded my arms over my chest and tilted my head back so I could see the sky. I could hear Rinoa's voice, followed by Squall's. He wasn't amused by the "plan" they had all come up with, but he was at least willing to play along. I could tell by his tone he was being honest with Rinoa, and since she wasn't squealing in girlish glee or getting that annoyed tone in her voice, she was being honest with him as well. For a moment, I felt a spike of jealousy, but I realized that it was Squall the Sorceress' Knight reacting to his sorceress, even though she was still powerless. Since I had only felt the pull of that bond with a corrupted sorceress, I had no idea what that bond felt like when the Knight _chose_ to be a Knight for himself. I wondered if I would ever feel that kind of bond.

 _Do you need to?_

I looked down onto the solar array and saw the reflection of Carbuncle looking back at me. His little furry head was tilted to the side in askance. _What?_

His head tilted the other way. _Do you need to feel that kind of bond? Isn't the love you have for Squall enough?_

I frowned. I wanted to answer 'of course', but then that would be a lie, I realized. I wanted to know what he felt for Rinoa as a Knight, if only so I could be on the same playing field as him. Carbuncle shifted, his ruby eyes flicking upward where he knew Squall was standing nearby. I wanted to look too, but I kept my eyes firmly on the furry GF. _Call me selfish,_ I said at last, _but I want to know what it's like to be the Knight of a good sorceress._

 _Squall could tell you. Why don't you ask him?_

 _One does not simply ask Leonhart personal things._

Carbuncle looked confused, but his image distorted as a tremor ran through the solar array behind me. It didn't take long for his image to vanish, and at last I turned around to see Rinoa and Squall behind me. Squall seemed shocked to see me standing there, but Rinoa had a kitten-who-got-the-cream smile on her face. She glanced at me, grinned, then focused on Squall as he turned to face her.

"That's it! Just let out anything!" she said, throwing her arms wide to her sides. "Anything... we want you to talk to us a little more. That's all. Y'know, if there's anything you want to tell us, or anything we can do, don't hesitate to let us know. I know it's not easy but I wish you would trust us and rely on us a little more, like you do Seifer."

I could almost imagine Squall's expression. It wasn't like he _didn't_ trust them, it was that he couldn't tell them that everything they were experiencing for the first time, he'd already lived through. I knew because he'd told me, and I was realizing it had been an incredibly condensed version that lacked in details. But they didn't know that I was in on the secret; all they saw was that Squall had taken an unnatural (for Squall) interest in me, and had basically made me his second in command. They had seen different facets of him over the last few weeks, and they recognized that he'd given them a measure of freedom that a normal leader wouldn't have. I mean, he knew Selphie was worked up over Trabia and he still sent her - with me and Quistis - to stop the attack on Balamb Garden despite the obvious hair-trigger she had on her self-control. She'd conducted herself admirably considering all things, but no other leader would have afforded her such leeway unless he'd been there to curb her himself.

"I trust you." Squall's soft voice brought me back to reality. He was looking away, off to the side as if he couldn't find the right words if he was looking at her. He continued, "I know it seems like things are happening that should be freaking me out, as it's freaked all of you out, but I can't let it affect me. At least, not in front of anyone. Believe me, there's no one else I'd rather have working with me than you guys."

Rinoa's grin lessened to a gentle smile. "You were just doing so much on your own..."

"There are things only I can do, just like there are things only you can do." Now he looked at her. "Like there are things only they can do. In the coming days, we're going to have to work together far more than usual to make sure we survive this."

Rinoa glanced at me, but I made a point of keeping my face neutral. Her eyes returned to Squall and she gave him a SeeD salute. Squall's body language told me that he found that amusing for some reason. "All right!" Rinoa said brightly. "I'll let everyone know. Don't stay up too late, okay? We've got a busy day ahead of us tomorrow!"

We watched her go, and soon it was just us and the terrible music being played by a couple of SeeDs who, for once, had no clue what they were doing. Squall turned to regard me with an amused little smile, and I shrugged.

"In my defense," I started, "I had nothing to do with the planning."

"I know."

"You actually let them do this?"

"I didn't have a choice. I was blissfully ignorant."

"Uh-huh."

Squall moved closer to me, until only a few inches separated us. He looked up at me, studying my face with a little frown. "I meant everything I said to her."

Now it was my turn to smile. "I know."

"Do you?"

Since his words sounded cryptic, I canted my head to the side and reached out to drape both my arms over his shoulders. After a moment, he raised his arms to wrap them around my waist, but he didn't step closer to me. I waited for him to continue, knowing me prompting him would only cause him to shut down. If he wanted me to answer, he would let me know with a glance or a twitch of his body.

At last Squall let out a soft breath. "There are only things you can do, Seifer. Many of those things we're going to discover along the way now, but I'm going to need you to do them, no matter what."

"I'll get them done." I swore.

Now he looked up at me, his stormy eyes both a little worried and a little relieved at once. "Even if I ask you to leave me behind?"

I felt my face become perfectly still as an unerring sense of unease came over me. "What do you mean?"

He just stared at me.

"Do I have to answer that now?"

He continued to stare at me.

I frowned deeply. "My loyalty is going to come with a price this time."

Blue-grey suddenly became wary.

 _Good,_ I thought, pulling him closer and more firmly against me in a tight hug that was more for my benefit than his, _he at least knows I still don't fuck around._

I held tightly to him for a few heartbeats longer, and felt his arms around my waist tighten slightly as well. It was my only clue to what he was feeling. No, he didn't want to lose me by forcing me do to something I would rebel against anyway, but he knew if he didn't have me do it, our entire mission would be at risk. At the same time, he knew me well enough that I _would_ rebel against him, especially if what he asked me to do forced me to choose. And there was no way in hell that I was going to choose the mission over his life or anyone else's. He knew that, too, which was why he hadn't said anything yet. It was his way of letting me know that he knew I was serious.

I leaned down so my lips could brush the pale shell of his ear, and I felt him shudder against me. His arms around my waist tightened more, as if he were afraid that I was going to push him away. Not that I was going to do that. Yet. I whispered, "We're too exposed here. I don't want anyone seeing us."

Squall's body tensed. His throat worked. I felt him nod against my lips, since they were still close to his ear. I let him go then, not wanting to make him feel caged. I didn't think he would run, but there was now that tenseness to his body that told me he was nervous and uncertain and maybe a little afraid. I kept my eyes on him as he moved toward the very edge of the solar array, under the platform that the mayor's house rested on. The shadows would hide us easily enough, and anyone looking for us would have to do some serious neck craning to be able to find us. He turned around and faced me, leaning against the structure in the most nervous, sexy way. If I didn't know him any better, I'd say he was doing it on purpose.

I approached him slowly, knowing if I didn't, Squall would likely punch me. He wouldn't run away; that wasn't in his nature. He watched me as I boxed him in, leaving him a little space to maneuver if he decided this wasn't going to happen. But those stormy eyes of his remained locked on mine, and I was happy to fall right into them.

Our lips met, at first tentatively. It still felt strange to be kissing another man, even if Squall could pass as a very convincing girl with a little makeup and the right clothes. Slowly, the kiss deepened. Squall's lips parted, allowing me to slip my tongue into his mouth. After a minute, I pulled back, grinning down at him. His stormy eyes narrowed in a mix of disappointment and confusion. I grinned wider. "I didn't expect you to favor peppermint, but I guess that makes sense for the Ice Prince."

Stormy grey narrowed at me.

Any response I could've had was stopped by one of his hands tangling in the short strands of hair on the back of my head, the other gripping the front of my shirt, and both working in unison to pull me down to kiss him again. I was all to happy to oblige him, and I moved my hands to grip his waist and pull him closer until we were flush against one another. I don't know how long we spent kissing, but eventually Squall made the first move, which surprised me. His hands slid away from my hair and my shirt and slid them both underneath my clothes, his fingers exploring my stomach and chest. His calloused fingers were rough against my skin, making me shiver. It took me a minute to get my wits about me to return the favor, slipping my hands under his white shirt to touch him in all the places he had touched me.

I didn't know how long Squall intended to keep feeling me up, and I knew I couldn't really make a move on him until he gave me his silent go-ahead. I wanted to; Hyne, I badly wanted to, considering how tight my own pants were getting, but I fought to content myself with his mouth and the smoothness of his skin, at least until I ran my fingers over the puckered flesh of a scar. Then his hands moved to my waist, allowing me to do the same. He broke the kiss and rested his forehead against my shoulder, panting softly. His hands, disappointingly, had stopped where they were, resting against my hips and not doing much more than that.

"Seifer." Squall whispered. I couldn't help the shiver that wracked my body at the husky sound of his voice, at the permission it granted in just the syllables of my name.

"Are you sure?" I asked.

His head nodded once against my shoulder.

My hands moved, slowly at first. Squall still wasn't looking at me; his forehead was pressed firmly against my shoulder. I could tell he was watching, though, because his breathing was changing. With each motion my fingers made against his first belt, then the second and third, his breath either hitched or released in a long sigh. I became aware that I was shaking slightly. It was nerves, excitement, a heady mix of fear and what-the-hell-am-I-doing, but I didn't stop. As I opened the last belt and hooked my fingers in the hem of Squall's pants to open them, Squall lifted his head and stared at me. I froze and stared back at him.

His lips twitched slightly, as if he were about to smile. "We don't have much time." he whispered.

I cocked my head slightly, still able to hear the terrible music being played. "Time enough."

Squall shook his head with a tiny smile on his lips. His hands moved, and I sucked in a deep breath as his hands slid from my hips to my belt. His fingers were swift with that and swifter still in opening my fly. Then he hesitated, and I imagined I was about to get a serious case of blue balls, at least until I felt the heat of his fingers hovering over my very erect member.

Squall let out a soft breath. "Are you sure about this, Seifer?"

"Fine time to be asking, Squall."

He looked up at me through his bangs. I somehow kept from rolling my eyes at him in exasperation and moved my left hand to his wrist. "I'm going to show you this once, but next time, I expect you to know what you're doing."

"I outrank you."

"Nice comeback, Ice Prince." I silenced him with a kiss before he could threaten me and I tightened my grip on his wrist so he couldn't pull away. He didn't seem to have that intent, instead letting his hand go limp so I could manipulate it. I said nothing as I guided his hand to my cock, other than to take a sharp breath as his gunblade-calloused fingers obligingly wrapped around the sensitive, hard flesh. He let out a soft noise that I wouldn't dare call a 'mew' to his face as I wrapped my own hand around his member. And then the time for words was gone, because once I started moving my hand, Squall began moving his in complete imitation. Whatever my fingers did to his cock, his did to mine. It was the most mind-blowing experience I'd ever had. Not even Rinoa, with her delicate fingers, compared to Squall. It was physical cues he used to gauge whether or not I liked something, and soon he found a rhythm that was sending me higher and higher on that proverbial cloud. He wasn't doing much better under my attention, though.

His pale skin was flushed, his eyes half closed as he watched our hands move. He made soft, breathy noises which I thought was typical Squall; even in combat, he never said a damn word or yelled anything, obscenities included. That was all me, and even though I let out a groaned "Fuck" now and then, I fought to keep my own noises down if only because I didn't know when the music would stop and I didn't want to share this with anyone except Squall.

Squall lifted his head and kissed me hard, wrapping his free arm around my neck to pull himself closer. My free arm went around his waist to keep him there, and our occupied hands seemed to work at a furious pace. Then Squall let out a sound that was pure, unadulterated pleasure and I felt wetness against my hand. That sensation, that _sound_ , broke me; I came too and came hard, gripping tightly to Squall because I felt as though if I let him go, I would fall and wouldn't be able to get back up.

It took both of us longer than it probably should have to recover from our orgasms. Squall pulled back enough to be able to release me and pull his hand up between us, staring at the pearlescent fluid covering his fingers like it was a blobra about to eat his face. It was an expression I wouldn't dare call cute and hope to live. His grey eyes flicked to me, studying my face. I let go of him as well, able to stand at last on my own two feet without his support. Squall shivered as he lost my close warmth and went to scrub his hand clean on his thigh. I caught his wrist, though, and brought his hand to my lips, where I licked my own essence off the slim digits. I almost laughed as Squall's eyes grew wide at my ministrations and when he jerked his hand, I let him go.

"The hell, Seifer?" Squall asked, staring at his hand like it had betrayed him.

"What?"

"That's... that's..."

"That's what?"

"You know what." he growled softly.

I grinned and licked my own hand clean, only because it would irritate him. "Disgusting? I didn't know you were such a prude, Leonhart. I just wanted to know what you tasted like."

His cheeks flamed bright red. He glanced at his own hand, which still had small traces of my seed on it. I could almost see the wheels turning in his head and it took all my willpower to keep from grinning any wider than I was already. Squall flicked his gaze back up to mine and pointedly scrubbed his hand clean on his pants before he zipped himself back up and re-did all of his belts. Now I did grin wider and earned a glower from him.

"We should get back." he said at last.

I caught him as he passed me and pulled him to me for a kiss. He resisted, but gave in at last. When he pulled back, there was a little scowl on his face, that expression that told me he wasn't quite sure what to think of me at that moment. "Squall," I started.

He kissed me to silence me. Then he took my hand and led me back to Garden.


	21. Chapter 21

Twenty-One - Squall POV

I guess I hadn't been expecting Seifer to go that far, especially since what we had done was a new experience for both of us. Although, after I had thought about it for a little while, I guess Seifer had some experience in tasting his own essence, considering I was pretty sure him and Rinoa had done what he and I had done, and quite a bit more. I had brought Seifer back to my room after the concert and while I hadn't initiated anything more after that, Seifer seemed more than content to hold me while he slept. Still, I could sense some disappointment in him. I knew he had hoped that my bringing him back to my room would lead to more than just handjobs in the dark. I was slightly surprised he didn't try to argue his case with me, if I had to be honest. Continuing with the honesty, I didn't know why I was being a prude, as he called me. I wanted to go further... I wanted to know what it felt like when he...

I was glad the elevator was empty so I could get my blush under control. I'd left Seifer sleeping in my room, knowing he'd come looking for me when he woke. If he didn't get attacked by Rinoa first, that was. Of course I wanted to make him mine in every sense of the word, to be his, but... but I didn't want to cross that line so fully and then have it all taken away from me. I _still_ didn't know how Time Compression would go this second time around. If I had to wander that wasteland again, I wanted at least one regret to carry with me. Maybe it was holding onto a regret was what had send me back here in the first place.

I entered the bridge, startling Quistis, Xu, and Nida. The three seemed sheepish and that look grew more profound as my eyebrow steadily climbed higher on my forehead. Quistis recovered fastest, giving me a SeeD salute.

"Greetings commander!"

Xu grinned. "We thought you should have a title. So Quistis and I decided on commander."

"Sorry to carry things out on our own, but Xu and I assigned duties." Quistis continued.

"That's fine." I said, stopping Xu before she could tell me her assignment. "Do what you need to do. Quistis, make sure Selphie gets some good rest. She deserves it, after all she's done."

Quistis and Xu looked at each other, then back to me. "Um," said Quistis, "all right."

"I have some reports for you," Xu started.

I nodded, silently indicating I'd be with her in a minute. I looked toward Nida. "Did those technicians teach you everything you need to know about piloting the Garden, Nida?"

Nida's eyes nearly popped out of his head. "Hey! You actually remembered me! We passed the SeeD exam together, but I didn't expect you to remember me." He gave me a nervous grin as I continued to stare at him. He gestured to the Garden's controls. "The Garden's ready to go anytime. Just let me know where you want to go."

"Any suggestions on where we should go?" Quistis asked.

Balamb was the obvious answer, and I knew Xu was going to suggest it. There was no reason for us to go there, really, only because I knew it was under Galbadia occupation while they looked for Ellone. We had run into Fujin and Raijin there in the Before, where we learned that they were following Seifer, not Edea, and would always be right there to support him because they were friends and they believed in him. Other than learning information I already knew (but the others didn't, obviously) there was no reason for us to head to Balamb.

I held up a hand to stop Xu and said instead, "Let's head for Trabia Garden."

"What? Why? We could find out what's going on in Balamb!" Xu protested.

"And do what?" I asked, pinning her with an icy stare. "If we return to Balamb, and it's under Galbadia occupation, we could ignite an already tense situation. If it's not, then we're simply assuaging our own desire to make sure our home is safe."

"But what if it _is_ under occupation?" Quistis asked, twisting her hands against her stomach.

"Then, believe it or not, the people there are safer if we stay away." I said, my tone leaving no room for any more arguments. "Trabia was targeted by those missiles, remember? They no doubt have wounded in need of medical attention. Their supplies must be running low. Besides, Selphie will want to see what happened to her home."

"That's a terrible surprise to give her, Squall." Xu said, scowling at me.

I was tempted to say 'That's _Commander_ Squall to you' just to piss her off, but I kept my face and voice neutral as I replied, "Why don't you go ask _her_ what _she_ wants, Xu? If Selphie says she'd rather go to Balamb, then I'll gladly give you the title of Commander. If not..." I let the sentence hang, noticing how Xu had suddenly stiffened and her eyes had narrowed. I looked at Nida, who looked like he wanted to crawl into a hole and hide from the two of us. "Nida, set a course for Trabia. And you can take your time."

"Uh, yes, sir, Commander."

ooo

I've come to the conclusion that both Rinoa and Seifer share the same uncanny ability to find me no matter where I choose to hide. Both of them found me in a secluded corner of the training grounds, which proved my earlier theory that Rinoa was waiting to pounce on Seifer after he left my room to hunt for me. I looked up at their approach, Seifer leading with a confident step and Rinoa a half-step behind, and watched Seifer take in my countenance, Lion Heart, the dead T-Rexaur lying in a pool of its coagulating blood about fifty yards away, and saw his lips twitch into a knowing smirk. Rinoa made a face at the blood and the mess, then tapped Seifer on the shoulder and pointed to a flower blooming on a vine that was slowly strangling the tree it had curled around. Seifer nodded and continued to approach me.

I didn't bother to get up. Seifer plunked himself on the ground beside me, pointedly not looking at me. I appreciated that. I didn't know how - and probably never would know how - he was able to read me like an open book. Eventually, Seifer turned his head enough to look at me, indicating that I had been silent long enough.

"It's getting to you, isn't it?" Seifer asked, keeping his voice quiet. Rinoa was still out of earshot, still studying the flowering vine, but it was quiet in the training ground. "Knowing, I mean."

I nodded.

"You skipped over something, didn't you?"

I nodded again.

"What was it?"

"Balamb." I replied softly. "I skipped over it. We're heading to Trabia. Xu is an insufferable bitch."

To my surprise, Seifer burst out laughing, drawing a concerned look from Rinoa. "You're just realizing that _now_ , Leonhart? The way she acted during our exam didn't tip you off?" Seifer dissolved into a laughing fit, practically roaring. I watched him, waiting for him to sober. It was long minutes before he did, and he reached for me, cupping my chin and pulling me closer to kiss me. "Squall, I love you, but you're awfully dense sometimes."

"...Thanks, I suppose..."

"I didn't mean it as a compliment. It's true. You were always such a stickler for the rules, always so emotionless, that now that you're finally expressing yourself, you're noticing everything you were so apathetic about before, and it's getting to you. That, and not sticking with the timeline exactly."

I frowned. "You're enjoying yourself, aren't you?"

He grinned, the irritating bastard. "Immensely."

"..."

"So why were Xu's panties in such a twist about Balamb and you being supreme Commander and not taking us there?"

I sighed. "Because Balamb is under Galbadian occupation right now, but since Fujin and Raijin are here, last time I checked, I figured there's no point in throwing fuel on a fire. Besides, Trabia could use our help more than the people in Balamb."

Seifer frowned slightly, lines creasing his forehead as he scowled in the direction of the dead T-rexaur. "You fought them, didn't you? Fujin and Raijin."

I nodded. "You were still the Sorceress' Knight at the time, and they were watching your back. Raijin was screwing around, of course, but..." I shrugged. "They never gave up on you."

"At least until the end."

I lifted my shoulders and let them fall.

Seifer blew out a breath. His gaze traveled to Rinoa, who had suddenly found that flower immensely interesting, which told me she had been staring at us for some time without us noticing. I hated myself in that moment, because I was forcing her into this again, and knowingly this time. Rinoa didn't deserve what was about to happen to her, but I needed it to happen. If I wanted to save Seifer... if I wanted to stop Ultimecia... to protect Ellone... the entire goddamn world.

"Do you want me to tell Rinoa to go away?" Seifer asked.

"No."

"We could spar. Violently."

I looked at him with a steadily rising eyebrow. "What?"

"I haven't gotten to face this you. And don't you dare mention our fight while I was under that bitch's control." He grinned widely. "I want to see what you can do. It'll be good for you. Blow off some stress. I know you never relax unless you're in battle."

I pressed my lips into a thin line. "I don't want to hurt you."

"Who says you're going to hurt me?"

"I do."

"Not fucking likely."

"You have no idea what I'm capable of, Seifer."

He smirked, his green eyes glinting with a dangerous light. "And you don't know what I'm capable of."

"I know enough."

"Gee, that stings, Leonhart." Seifer surged to his feet and unsheathed Hyperion. He swung the blade toward my head, pressing the edge of the blade against my pulse. "You can fight back, or I can beat the shit out of you. Your choice."

"Hey!" Rinoa called, hurrying over. "You said you weren't going to fight him! That's why I helped you find him!"

I slowly got to my feet, becoming acutely aware of Seifer and the blade pressed against my throat. "It's fine, Rinoa." I said softly.

She turned her glare on me. "No, it's not. He promised me he wouldn't fight you." She stepped between us as I backed away from Hyperion's edge and bent to pick up Lion Heart. "This isn't the time to be fighting each other."

Using the flat of Hyperion's blade, Seifer gently pushed Rinoa toward what would be the sidelines of our arena. He said, "This is the perfect time to fight each other. You'll learn in time, princess, that the longer Squally-boy goes without participating in wanton violence, the more uptight he becomes. Stand there. No, right there. Yeah."

Rinoa folded her arms over her chest and glared at both of us. "If you two don't stop when I call time, I'll beat the crap out of both of you."

I couldn't help my smirk at that. Seifer let out a belly laugh at it, making Rinoa turn up the volume on her glower. He sobered quickly enough as I moved into position, gripping Lion Heart in both hands as I fell into stance. Seifer lifted Hyperion and though his eyes became suddenly serious, there was a playful quirk to his lips that told me he'd gotten his way and was immensely pleased about it. Minutes passed as we watched each other, waiting for the other to make the first move. I studied the lines of Seifer's body, looking for any indication of what his intent might be. I knew he was studying me the same way. Time didn't matter to either of us.

Seifer charged, shoving off with his left foot. As I'd expected him to, he struck from the right, slicing Hyperion toward my throat. I ducked low and danced back, moving on the defensive. Seifer obliged by chasing me, striking fast and hard for my side. Hyperion was a blur of flashing silver, and I keenly felt the vibrations of the impacts with Lion Heart through my fingers and forearms as I parried and defended myself from him. I knew Seifer hadn't gotten serious yet; he was still trying to figure out if he could create an opening in my defenses without giving me one. The longer I stayed defensive, the more serious he would become.

I caught Hyperion on Lion Heart's edge and angled my body to let the blade slide right past my shoulder and arm. My heel hit the ground and I pivoted, throwing Seifer's larger weight off balance. As he stumbled, I attacked, forcing him to defend himself from my assault. That haughty smirk of his vanished instantly as he felt the first heavy blow, and he started to realize that maybe I had been right after all. But he surprised me when he retaliated with faster, harder strikes, and the training area filled with the sound of our gunblades crashing together. Footfalls, breathing, and grunts from repeated impacts became the background symphony to the clash of metal against metal as we each fought to gain the upper hand against our opponent. I caught Seifer grinning wildly as we came together, our blades shaking as we fought to unbalance each other. Seifer would - and did - beat me there, because he was heavier than I was, but I was faster. I was able to slide out from under him as our blades slid and sparked against each other and spun around behind him.

Seifer whirled faster than I had thought he would and struck for my spine. I flung Lion Heart behind me and caught Hyperion, turning my body to deflect the brunt of the attack to the side. Seifer allowed Hyperion to swing wide and spun his body with it to avoid Lion Heart's edge. His fist came in for my face as he came back around, and I ducked under the swing and punched him in the ribs. He grunted and staggered backwards, but he didn't stay back for long. He lunged at me, thrusting Hyperion forward and then changing the thrust to a slash at the last second. I barely had time to adjust Lion Heart to catch the attack and didn't expect the kick that came at my knee when I was unbalanced. I fell and nearly lost my grip on Lion Heart as I hit the ground. I rolled quickly to the side as Hyperion crashed into the ground where my body once lay and swirled to my feet, lunging toward Seifer as he was recovering from his failed victory strike. I cut Lion Heart across the space between us but missed, as Seifer threw himself into a roll away from me.

"Time!" Rinoa yelled.

Seifer ignored her. He charged at me, then threw his left hand forward and released the fireball that he had charged up. I had two choices that I could make in this split second moment: I could dodge it, and leave myself open for an attack, or I could block it and make a counterattack while he was trying to recover. Of course, that meant I would have to ignore Rinoa as well.

I brought Lion Heart up and sliced through the fireball, holding my ground as Seifer came right at me. He was close enough for me to see the whites of his eyes before I moved. I ducked under Hyperion's swing and got past Seifer's guard. I punched him hard in the stomach, then twisted away as he doubled over. I caught his arm and pulled it behind him, kneeing him in the back of the legs to push him down and win the match. Instead, he used his height and weight against me, flipping me over his shoulder before I was set and nearly throwing me to the ground.

"Damn you both, I said 'time'!" Rinoa screamed again.

We both ignored her. I pulled away from Seifer as hard as I could and set myself for another attack. Seifer did the same. A distance of perhaps a hundred feet separated us now, and both of us were panting hard. Seifer was still grinning, but it was dangerous. He knew that if he didn't end it now, he wasn't going to win. He'd taken my measure the moment he tried to throw me. He charged, Hyperion held low for a diagonal strike that drew strength from the waist and hips and followed through toward the shoulder. I would have to turn into the strike in order to block the attack and after I stopped Hyperion's motion, I could hook my foot behind his ankle and pull to get Seifer off balance and to the ground.

I didn't get the chance.

Suddenly Rinoa was between us, her arms spread wide. Her back was to me; she was facing Seifer and I was sure she was glaring death at him. She was pissed with us for ignoring her. There was no way Seifer could stop himself; he'd already committed to the swing when she appeared there. He would cut her in two before he could stop his momentum. I saw it in his eyes; he knew Rinoa was dead.

I lunged for Rinoa and grabbed her around the middle, hauling her out of the way of Hyperion's blade. I heard her gasp as she was suddenly lifted off her feet and she grabbed my arm out of fear. I spun her, swinging her out of harm's way and into relative safety. I bared my teeth in pain as I felt Hyperion bite into my side and tear a rent in my flesh in a diagonal across my back and shoulder. Seifer cursed loudly and colorfully as he finished his follow-through and I collapsed nearly on top of Rinoa.

"Oh, Squall!" Rinoa gasped, her eyes wide. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine." I gave her a slight smirk to reassure her, pulling myself away from her so she wouldn't get any blood on her. "I've had worse."

"Fucking Hyne, Squall!" Seifer snapped, kneeling by my side where he could hover over my wound. "The _fuck_ were you thinking, huh?! I could've killed you!"

Rinoa wriggled out from under me and turned a little green when she saw the injury. I wasn't sure if she turned green because she couldn't handle the sight of blood and rent flesh, or if she turned green because she realized that she would've had that wound herself, and wouldn't be alive right now. "Squall," she breathed, her hand reaching out to hover over my shoulder.

I closed my eyes and ignored the sensation of blood seeping from the wound and soaking into my clothes. I cast a Curaga, stopping the blood-flow and sealing up the flesh. I cast another one to make sure the wound scarred over quickly, leaving just a dark line across my pale skin. "It's nothing." I said. "I'm fine."

"This is your fault, Seifer." Rinoa growled, an odd tone to her voice. Seifer looked up at her, his green eyes narrowed in anger. "You should've stopped when I said so!"

"It doesn't work that way!" Seifer snapped back. "You shouldn't have gotten involved! What the hell were you thinking, anyway? You don't just run into the middle of a fight!"

"I-"

"Enough." I put enough force into the word to make them stop arguing and look at me. I pushed myself up to stand, rotating my shoulder to make sure my healing hadn't made me stiff. I sheathed Lion Heart and chose to deal with Rinoa first, since her temper was more volatile than Seifer's. "Rinoa, Seifer has a point. You can't just run into a fight and expect someone to be able to stop on a dime. Fights don't work that way, especially between Seifer and I. You could've been seriously injured, even killed. But you're also right." Now I turned to Seifer. "When she called time, you should've stopped. It's my fault too, though, since I didn't back down before you rushed the final attack."

Seifer sheathed Hyperion and ran a hand through his blonde hair. "Hyne, Squall, you don't need to be apologizing."

"Yeah." Rinoa agreed, wringing her hands before her. "You're right. I shouldn't have done that. It's not your fault."

I blew out a sigh. "As the leader of our group, and the Commander of the SeeD, you're both my responsibility." I caught Seifer's eyes and felt heat rush to my face as his green gaze bored into mine, like he was able to see my very soul. "Especially you."

I would never be sure if Seifer had done it on purpose or he simply didn't care (it might've been a healthy mix of both) but he hooked his hand against the back of my neck and kissed me hard. Rinoa squeaked in surprise and I could almost imagine her expression. Wide eyed, red cheeked, probably. I wanted to push him away, but Seifer pulled me closer to him and trapped my arms to my sides as he wrapped his other arm around me. He deepened the kiss, forcing me to accept it. So I reciprocated it, kissing him back and biting his lower lip as he pulled back to breathe. I managed to wriggle out of his hold at that point, moving a fair distance away from them both. It wasn't lost on me that Seifer had let me go, either.

I turned to face them and found that I had assumed right - Rinoa was red in the face, but she was also smiling in a strange way. Her confirmation smile, that's what it was. Then she pointed at me and said, "Just because you're the leader and the Commander doesn't mean you can just throw yourself at the world and hope it catches you! You need to take better care of yourself. You're not invincible." She gave Seifer a playful shove then. "You're not invincible, either."

Seifer cracked a grin, accepting her shove without retaliation. "I've got to agree with her this time, Squall. And I'm not saying that just because I want to appease her. It's because I love you."

I couldn't help it. My cheeks flamed red and I looked away from them both. I felt terrible, because I was about to sacrifice Rinoa - who was proving to already be turning into the person I counted as my best friend - in order to ensure that the timeline remained intact after I had changed so much of it. Seifer knew it was coming because I had told him, but I had left out many important details. I looked back at him, unsure what he was seeing in my face. I wanted to say the words, but I couldn't make myself do it. Instead, I turned on my heel and walked away, leaving Seifer and Rinoa behind me.


	22. Chapter 22

Twenty-Two (Seifer POV)

As I watched Squall walk away, I was torn between chasing after him and letting him have a minute or two to calm down. It disturbed him, the way I had kissed him in front of Rinoa. It wasn't that he didn't mind the kiss, it was more that he hadn't wanted anyone to really know about us. I wanted to tell him that it was kind of too late for that, since Rinoa had already figured it out thanks to my stellar ability to keep a straight face, but then, he deserved to feel uncomfortable now and then. It served as a reminder that people were going to find out eventually, and he would need to handle it when it did.

Rinoa huffed. "He could've at least said it back."

I laughed. "Leonhart's not like that. He won't say anything that doesn't need saying."

"But..."

"Look, like you said, he can't throw himself at the world and expect it to catch him. But that's exactly what he's going to do, to keep _us_ from getting scars." I looked down at Rinoa and found her staring up at me with concerned doe brown eyes. "So we'll need to back him up, protect him in the same way. Be there to heal his wounds."

She smiled. "I can do that, easy."

I smiled back at her but didn't say anything. It had disturbed me more than Squall knew to see Hyperion slice his skin and draw blood. I knew that in the Before, we had been on opposite sides of the war, and we had fought each other to the death. Squall had fought with everything he had in order to stop me, the other me, knowing that he could - and maybe did - end my life. He had fought with that same conviction in our duel, as he always did. I had fought to kill him as well, knowing that we'd either fight into a stalemate or he would win when he was ready to end it. Rinoa interfering had given me a coronary, but seeing Squall take the hit made my entire body feel as though ice was flowing through my veins. I could've severed his spine or damaged his arm enough to limit mobility. A Curaga spell wouldn't have been enough to heal him. I decided I was going to yell at him later, when he couldn't run away from me.

"Hey, Seifer."

"Yeah, princess?"

Rinoa twisted her hands against her stomach. "It's gonna get crazy from here on out, isn't it?"

I smiled, hoping it was reassuring. "Sure it is. But don't worry. You got me and Squall to watch your back."

She nodded and stretched her arms out in front of her. "I think I'm gonna go find something to eat."

I escorted her out of the training grounds, let her go off to the cafeteria on her own, then went to find Squall. He wasn't in our room, but I knew he'd stopped there when I found his torn coat and shirt on the bed. I wondered how many outfits he had, considering I'd only ever seen him in his SeeD uniform or his typical black leather, belts, white shirt, and short black coat with its furred collar. I could wait for him there, but I figured he would know I was waiting to ambush him here and would avoid his room for a while. Besides, I was pretty confident something exciting was about to happen.

Something did happen, but it wasn't exciting.

We arrived at Trabia Garden.

I followed behind Squall and Selphie as we approached the Garden, and I wondered how Selphie could still move with how hard she was trembling. The missiles had done their job, destroying Trabia Garden so that it was a mere shadow of itself. I could only wonder how many people had died in the attack. They had had no warning, no way to mitigate the damage or protect themselves.

"A direct... hit?" Selphie asked, her voice thick with emotion.

Squall reached out and squeezed her shoulder, but he didn't say anything. Some might think him cold for not trying to comfort her, but it would've been worse if he had tried to say something to spare her feelings.

Selphie took a deep breath and turned watery eyes on Leonhart. "...I'm going in."

Squall nodded. "Be careful."

Selphie nodded and headed toward the wall in front of us. She gripped the mesh net and began to climb. After she had reached the top and disappeared from view, Squall followed with me close behind. It didn't take long for the others to catch up with us.

"Squall!"

Irvine puffed up to us, a hand to his head to keep his hat there. "Have you guys seen Selphie?"

The others murmured similar questions, all the while looking at the destroyed Garden with wide eyes and varying expressions.

"Yeah..." Squall responded. "I let her go on ahead."

"I bet you she's in shock." Irvine said, as if it wasn't obvious. "Come on, let's go after her." He didn't wait for us; Irvine took off toward Trabia, following Selphie's path. The rest of us moved after him, but at a slower pace.

Eventually, after giving the injured what aid we could and trying to help the survivors put some semblance of normalcy back into their lives, we found ourselves at the basketball court. The entire place was in shambles, proving that the destruction of Trabia Garden had been rampant and widespread. It was a bittersweet moment for me, because Before, _I_ had been the one who had ordered Trabia's destruction. _I_ had killed its SeeD and its students. This time around, I didn't bear the brunt of that blame, but I somehow still felt responsible. Glancing at Squall, I knew he felt the same.

He glanced up at me, then looked at the others gathered around them. "We're leaving as soon as Selphie comes back. We're on standby 'til then."

I slowly made my way toward Squall, trying to gauge his mood. I wasn't sure if he wanted me near him right now, so I kept some space between him and circled. I also studied the rest of the group, noting Irvine's expression and wondering what he was thinking about. Rinoa, too, looked like she was thinking. After watching Leonhart and I fight, then seeing this destruction, I was pretty sure she was starting to have second thoughts about standing and fighting. I knew she was a pacifist at heart, but the way she had conducted herself so far had told me she was willing to fight if she had to. Now, I wasn't so sure of that.

Selphie walked into the court a minute later, kicking a basketball before her. "Sorry to keep you waiting!" she said. Despite the obvious sorrow in her eyes and voice, she beamed at all of us. "Thanks so much for coming all the way out here, everyone."

Irvine tipped his hat toward her. "Cheer up, eh?"

Selphie smiled. "Thanks." She turned to Squall then, standing a little straighter. "Take me with you when you fight the sorceress, okay? I wanna get even. I want my revenge!"

I saw Squall twitch at that, but before he could say anything, there was a nervous sound from Rinoa. She had wrapped her arms around herself, as if she were cold, and was looking like a kicked puppy. "Um... Do we... have to fight?" she asked. "Isn't there another way? Y'know, to avoid any bloodshed?"

Zell was the first to jump on her for that, and it took all my willpower not to punch the chickenwuss for what he snapped at her. "Yo!? What the...!? What are you sayin' all of a sudden!?"

Rinoa flinched but her back was up then, and she wasn't going to back down now. "Maybe someone really smart can come up with a way, so we wouldn't have to fight anymore..."

Zell took a step toward her then froze as Squall turned an icy gaze in his direction. I'd never seen Zell go so still. Then Squall focused on Rinoa and I swore his expression became softer. "If someone can come up with something, that'd be great." he started. "But the truth of the matter is, no one knows what to do. If there was a way we could protect everyone and stop the sorceress without fighting, I would take it in a heartbeat. But there isn't. We have to fight, because the sorceress isn't going to stop until there's no one left to oppose her."

Squall's voice became softer then. "You were part of a resistance movement in Timber. Unlike others who were all talk, you took to your weapons and fought, even though you were terrified that the next mission might be your last. Are you scared?"

Rinoa nodded tightly. "Sometimes... when I'm with all of you... I feel like we're on the same wavelength... you know? But when the battles start happening, it's different. I saw it, when you and Seifer were fighting in the training center. Everyone's tempo seems to pick up and... I get left behind. I try to catch up, but it's no use. How far is everyone going? I can't hear anyone... Once I catch up, I wonder... Is everyone safe? Will they welcome me with open arms? ...Is everyone okay? Will we all make it back together? When I start thinking like that..."

"Rinoa," Irvine said, "I understand. Someone might not be there. Someone you love may disappear before your very eyes. It's tough when you live your life thinking that way. But that's why I fight... When I was a little kid... I was about four or so... I was in an orphanage." He picked up the basketball and took a shot, watching it hit the backboard. "Plenty of kids... All with no parents... It was around the end of the Sorceress War, so I guess it couldn't be helped. Anyway, that's where I was. And out of all the kids there, one was very special to me."

I glanced at Squall while Irvine talked. Squall's lips had become a thin line and he was focused on Irvine with a steely intensity. Irvine continued, not even noticing. "I really liked this girl, and it made me so happy just talking to her."

Selphie inhaled sharply and shivered. "Was that orphanage... a stone house?"

Irvine nodded. "You guessed it..."

"An old house made of stone?" Quistis asked, her voice almost trembling. "By the ocean?"

Irvine smirked. "You guessed it... I knew right away, when we first met!"

"Heey, why didn't you tell us!?" Selphie cried.

Quistis agreed with her. "Yes, why didn't you tell us?"

Irvine shrugged. "'Cause you two seemed to have forgotten! It just kinda sucked that I was the only one who remembered... Spunky little Sefie and bossy little Quisty."

"That is just sooo weird..." Selphie breathed.

I half-listened to Selphie, Quistis, Irvine, and soon Zell gush over the childhood memories that only Irvine seemed to remember clearly. I was focused on Squall, watching his face. No, Irvine wasn't the only one who remembered his childhood clearly - Squall did too. He remembered all of it, and had known this moment was coming. He glanced at me, subtlety tilted his head, then focused back on the others. I heard my name and my attention focused on Zell the moment he looked over at me.

"Seifer was there, too." Irvine said. "Except for Rinoa, we were all there."

Selphie looked at Squall excitedly. "Heeey that means..."

Squall nodded slowly. "Yeah... I was there, too." He folded his arms over his chest in that protective gesture I was so familiar with. He had known this moment was coming, but he was still reluctant to speak about it. I was a little pissed he hadn't told me we'd known each other for a lot longer than I thought we had, but I supposed I couldn't blame him. It wasn't important, just like Squall knowing who his dad was and why those Moomba back at the D-District Prison knew his father wasn't important. "I was always waiting for 'Sis' to come back. Ellone... She was a bit older than us, and we all used to call her 'Sis'."

The others dissolved into talk about Ellone and why certain members of our 'orphanage gang' were adopted and others weren't. I ignored them, still staring at Squall. He wasn't meeting my gaze, meaning there was more about to come that he was more than willing to let the others figure out instead of leading them by the nose to it. Maybe I wasn't being fair, but I could feel my temper starting to shred, and I was ready to snap at Squall.

 _There's no reason to be angry with Squall._ Ifrit said, his voice actually gentle for once.

 _Of course there's a reason! He knew all of this, and still knows more that he's not telling me. He gave me the overview of it all._ I snapped back.

A flare of temper threaded through Ifrit but the GF somehow stayed calm in the face of my anger. _Yes. The overview. And what would you have done had he come right out and told you every minute detail?_

I started to argue, then stopped, embarrassed and a little angry at myself. Ifrit chuckled. _Exactly. You have nothing to say. Being told something doesn't have the same effect as experiencing it. You can't just tell someone how to wield a gunblade; you have to make them hold it, appreciate the weapon for its danger and elegance. Squall is applying the same principle to this journey._

I looked at Squall, registering his expression as one of regret and apology. It became more obvious as he looked at me, and less so as he looked toward the others. No, he didn't care about them, how they figured out what they figured out. He already knew how they would react to the newfound knowledge. He was more worried about me, about my reaction, since he had already told me about what he'd experienced and what he had planned to do to ensure the rest of his already-lived adventure continued the way it had Before. Squall's arms tightened around himself, which told me everything I really needed to know.

 _See?_ Ifrit said. _He weighed the consequences of telling you and leaving you in the dark, knowing exactly how you would react when he told you and how you would react when you learned something that he should've told you._

 _Shut up. And don't sound so smug._

"Hey..." Quistis said. "Do you all remember Matron?"

Zell smiled fondly. "She was always wearin' black..."

Selphie tapped her fingers with her lips. "Let's see..."

"I see a resemblance. Matron..." Zell grinned. "They look alike..."

Selphie frowned. "Wait... I just pictured her face, and..."

"Very kind... Long black hair..." Quistis seemed to beam. "Yes, I really admired her."

Irvine blew out a sigh and shook his head. "Look alike? Nah, that's not it. Matron's name is Edea Kramer. Matron _is_ Sorceress Edea."

Selphie shivered. "Matron... Sorceress Edea..."

Quistis looked as shocked as we all felt. "Why is the Matron...?"

"Why?" Irvine asked. "You're wondering why Matron would take over a country, or fire missiles and whatnot? At this point, we probably wouldn't comprehend it even if we talked about it."

I looked at Squall, as if he was going to jump right in and explain to them everything he had explained to me. But he didn't. I knew why. They wouldn't believe that Edea was possessed by a sorceress from years and years in the future. And even if they did believe it, they wouldn't fight to their fullest to try and bring back the Matron we all remembered. They would be afraid of hurting her, of killing her, and then we would all lose. And _that_ , I realized, was what Squall had weighed before and was weighing now.

Irvine continued speaking, but I ignored him. Whatever he said didn't matter to me, anyway. I already knew our entire group was going to remain together for the duration of this. Squall had already assured me of it, even though he was going to do some things that would cause some real strain on everyone, especially Rinoa. Squall was already strained because of his firsthand knowledge and the weight on his shoulders was pounding him down, little by little. Even though he knew he _had_ to do it, it still beat his conscience to a pulp, and I wasn't helping any by looking at him like he was public enemy number one.

Eventually, it was decided that we would stop by Edea's house, the orphanage, to try and find some clue as to why Matron suddenly went from benevolent caretaker to power-mad murderer. Squall didn't have any objections to doing that, so the group began to head back to Balamb Garden outside Trabia's gates. I paused, waiting for Squall, and noticed that Rinoa had stopped under the basketball hoop, staring at the ground beneath her feet. Without speaking to one another, Squall and I approached her. I stopped on her left while Squall stopped on her right, and we both looked down at her, waiting for her to speak.

Rinoa looked up at Squall, then at me. "...You guys are fearless."

Squall shook his head slowly. "No. I'm completely afraid. I'm afraid that I won't be able to protect you or Seifer or the others when we face Matron. Any number of things could go wrong. What if I'm forced to choose between saving you or saving Selphie or Irvine? What if I send you on a mission and you get killed? How can I live with myself then?"

Rinoa just stared at Squall for the longest time, her face set in an expression that told me she hadn't expected Squall to say what he did. "Squall..."

His chest expanded slightly as he inhaled. Then he turned his back to both of us and said, "I wish we didn't have to fight, either."

He walked away then, and Rinoa and I followed at his heels. There really wasn't anything we could add to what he said, anyway.


	23. Chapter 23

Twenty-Three - Squall POV

After a quick stop at the orphanage to reminisce about our childhood, I returned to Garden in a somber mood. I knew what was coming next, and I wasn't sure how it would turn out this time. How many people would die today? How many people would be killed because I decided to change my choice of how things were going to play out? Seifer was no longer there to direct the Galbadian forces, but that didn't mean Edea hadn't found someone else to play the role of her knight. Anyone could direct the soldiers in the invasion. Anyone could control Lunatic Pandora once it awoke.

I headed up to the bridge to talk to Nida. I knew Galbadia Garden would be nearby sooner or later, and I was hoping for later. I wouldn't mind having a few extra minutes to prepare Balamb Garden for the impending attack. But my luck had been rather bad lately, as it had been Before, and as soon as I approached Nida I could see the huge shadow in the distance. And it was closing fast.

"Squall," said Nida, a hint of worry in his voice, "take a look."

I took the binoculars from him and peered through them at the distant Garden.

"What do you think?"

"The battle is inevitable." I replied. I lowered the binoculars and handed them back to Nida.

"The sorceress is with them, huh?" Nida asked. "So this is going to be the final battle?"

 _I wish._ I kept quiet, letting him draw his own conclusions from my expression. I folded my arms across my chest and stared at the Garden quickly approaching. No matter how fast we worked, I knew there would still be casualties. I picked up the microphone and flicked it on. Before, my voice had a slight shake to it as I made my orders clear to the SeeD of Balamb Garden. Now, my voice was steady as I issued the last orders I would give to the people in this Garden before everything went to hell. Like Before, I focused on our defense and protecting the underclassmen. I stressed that no one was to play hero, though, and no one was to take unnecessary risks. Then I called for Quistis, Zell, and Selphie to join me on the bridge.

When I finished, I faintly heard Irvine's voice from below and sighed. Even now, I knew what was about to happen. Even though I had done everything I could to prevent anyone from getting the wrong idea about Rinoa and I, they still were trying to get us together. I frowned to myself, though, wondering why Rinoa would still bother to ask Zell to make a ring for her that looked like mine. Before, I had figured it was because she wanted to have something of mine as a way of being closer to me. I had let it go at that, because so many other things were happening that it wasn't important. But now, I was wondering if that had been the real reason. Why had she asked for a ring like mine in the first place? The only way to find out was to ask, I suppose, especially since now Rinoa knew the truth about me and Seifer. Filing that resolution in the back of my mind for later, I took the lift down and found Irvine standing there with Quistis and Selphie. I wasn't surprised, but ignored him for the most part as I looked at Quistis.

She straightened. "What do you want us to do?"

"I want you guys to help me lead the others. We're going to divide into two teams, once Zell finishes fooling around and gets here."

Selphie's eyes shifted to look at Quistis and I saw her bite her lower lip. I knew what she was wondering - did I know? I fought the smile that wanted to spread across my face. She looked back at me and seemed to puff up a bit. "Zell...? I think he's actually taking a nap, not fooling around. Yeah, he said he hasn't slept at all lately."

Quistis started when Selphie looked at her again. "What...? Oh, yeah."

"Whatever." I sighed. I wondered how bad it would shock them if I called their bluff. It didn't matter; I knew where to find Zell anyway. "I'm going to the quad. Selphie, you're with me. Quistis, Irvine, you guys work together and lead the team at the front gate."

"Alrighty!" Irvine said, a big grin splitting across his face.

Quistis smiled, almost looking relieved. "Alright."

I headed toward the elevator with Selphie on my heels and the others behind her. Irvine stopped me before we reached it, and asked, "Hey, what about Rinoa?"

I looked back at him, then looked at Selphie and Quistis, who seemed to be far too interested in my answer. "Seifer will take care of her. If you see him, tell him that's an order." I didn't wait for Irvine or Quistis to reply; I got in the elevator with Selphie and headed down to the ground floor, and from there to the quad.

I thought about chewing Zell a new one this time around. Not only did he disregard my order - and enlist everyone else to lie to me about it - but he continued to ignore my order in favor of preparing the SeeD assigned to the quad even though I knew he saw me coming toward him. He turned to face me, grinning nervously and hoping that I thought it was one of utter confidence.

 _Let him be,_ said Shiva. I could feel her and the other Guardian Forces at the edge of my consciousness, watching through my eyes. _He thinks what he's doing is beneficial to you. So do the others. Unless you want to tell them the truth?_

 _Like hell._ I snapped back at her. I didn't need _that_ distraction on top of everything else.

 _Then let it go, and play along._

I fought to keep from scowling, knowing that Zell wouldn't understand that I wasn't scowling at him. Shiva seemed to know my emotions anyway, and she gave me a sympathetic smile that had the dangerous razor sheen of ice to it. I followed her advice, though, and went along with Zell's antics. When I handed him my Griever ring, I grabbed his wrist before he could withdraw and stared into his eyes long enough to make a few beads of sweat appear on Zell's forehead. "Don't you _dare_ lose it. I will take it from your hide if you do."

Zell gave a nervous laugh. "Uh, I won't! I didn't think you were actually gonna give it to me. Rinoa is going to be so happy!"

"Then you tell Rinoa what I told you. Don't. Lose. That. Ring."

Zell laughed again, and it was less nervous than the one before. "Alright, Squall! Leave this place up to me!"

Before I could head away from Zell and the quad, Rinoa and Seifer ran toward us. Judging by their expressions, they had both heard my announcement and knew what was coming. Seifer in particular looked a little haggard, as if he had tried to ignore the implications my orders had made. He wasn't over at Galbadia Garden this time, but he knew that it had been his fault Before that Balamb Garden had come under attack. That people had been killed. He also sported a red cheek, which meant he had tried to stop Rinoa from coming and failed. I knew how that was. I gave him a sympathetic smile and he nodded in return, but it was a tight nod. He was prepared to fight, but he wasn't prepared mentally for what we were going to face. Rinoa gave me a determined look as she stopped in front of me, her hands clenching at her sides in order to keep them from shaking.

"Guys, I'm gonna fight, too." she said, looking me right in the eyes. "I don't wanna just hide. I know I can fight. I want to fight alongside everyone."

Zell blew out a breath. "I hope this is the last time we have to fight in our home."

I started to leave, passing both Rinoa and Seifer. A shudder passed through Rinoa and she looked straight ahead as she said, "I have to fight. To prove to myself that I can do it... That I belong with you guys."

I paused, reaching to grip Rinoa's shoulder. "You don't have to prove anything, Rinoa. You already belong with us. Be careful." I looked at Seifer. "Take care of her."

"Take care yourself." Seifer said, his voice full of bravado and swagger.

"Squall!" Nida's voice crackled over the loudspeaker suddenly, making everyone, including me, tense. "Get back to the bridge right away!"

"Zell," I said, already moving, "I'm counting on you. Good luck, everyone."

I brushed past Seifer, not saying anything to him. He didn't say anything either. It wasn't in our nature to begin a fight with sweet nothings. It wasn't our way to tell each other not to worry, that we'd be just fine, and see you after this was over. We would fight and we would kill and we would survive because we were too stubborn to roll over and die. We would put our heads down and go to work, then lift our heads and breath easy when it was done.

I raced up to the bridge with Selphie just in time to see the Galbadia Garden picking up speed as it raced toward us. I could see someone standing where Seifer had stood Before, but it was no one I recognized.

 _Small miracles,_ Siren breathed.

I agreed with her, but kept my face neutral as Nida turned to look at me, a worried expression on his face. "They're heading right for us!" he said.

"Just keep going." I replied.

I saw the man signal the start of the attack and watched as the Galbadian soldiers launched themselves and their motorcycles into the air. Scant seconds later, they landed on Balamb Garden and began the assault on my home.

"We're gonna crash!" Nida screamed.

"Go right!" I snapped, bracing myself for the impact. I snatched the microphone, flipped it on, and yelled, "The enemy Garden is right by us! Quad team! Watch out!"

The impact between the two Gardens did its best impression of an earthquake. It felt the same now as it did Before, and I heard all the same sounds of metal screeching against metal as the two behemoths came together violently. I knew, too, what was happening below in the quad now. Balamb Garden was crumbling from the impact, and Rinoa was hanging from the ruins, close to falling to her death. As much as I hated it, I had to leave her to Zell and Seifer. Even if I ran to her aid, there wasn't anything I could do, not until later into the battle. I knew she wouldn't fall to her death, but Zell and Seifer wouldn't know that. I closed my eyes briefly as the tremors slowly subsided. Seifer was going to kill me for springing that little surprise on him, and even though he knew Rinoa would survive, seeing her hanging there would scratch at his temper worse than me allowing myself to be hit during our fight.

 _Stop it, Squall._ I chided myself. _You can't think about that right now. You need to keep moving forward. You'll deal with it when you get there._

I picked myself up, pulled Selphie to her feet, and headed down to the front gate when Xu called. At the same time I arrived there, so did Zell and Seifer. I met Seifer's gaze with an emotionless mask, seeing the fury in his emerald eyes. His lips were in a thin line, and he looked like he wanted to yell at me.

Zell beat him to it. "Squall! Rinoa's in trouble!"

Before I could reply, Nida's voice came over the loudspeaker. "Squall, listen up! The enemy is attacking the classroom. The junior classmen are there. We have to do something fast!"

Xu's voice came next. "The enemy's heading this way!"

"Squall," Zell shouted, reaching for my shoulder, "DID YOU HEAR ME!?"

"I heard you!" I snapped back, slapping his hand away from me. Everyone went silent around me, staring at me with wide eyes. Except Seifer. He understood my dilemma and was keeping silent. I hated it, because I wished fervently that he, at least, would yell at me. "But she's not the only one in danger!"

Irvine scowled. "Didn't think you were so heartless, Squall. Rinoa is gonna die! Don't you realize that?"

I turned an icy glare on him, and the step back he took was purely involuntary. "Rinoa," I said, spacing out my words and filling each syllable with enough menace to make everyone pale, "is _not_ going to die. I will save her. But right now, she is the lowest priority on my list. Seifer, Selphie, come with me. Irvine, Quistis, you go with Xu. Help her hold the front gate. Zell, you help Rinoa. Do whatever it takes, alright!?"

Zell swallowed hard. "Leave it to me!"

I took off at a flat run toward the elevator with Seifer and Selphie behind me. I entered the elevator and slammed my fist against the button for the second floor. Selphie jumped at that, but Seifer just regarded me with a blank expression. We reached the classroom in record time, and the soldiers that crashed through the classroom's window barely had a chance to register they were in battle before Seifer and I cut them down.

Selphie whistled lowly. "You guys are _pissed_."

Seifer and I looked at her at the same time and whatever she saw in our faces made her give a nervous little laugh. I looked at the SeeD charged with guarding the two kids. "Good work. Take them somewhere safe."

She saluted me. "Yes, sir! Come on guys. Let's go." She herded the kids out of the room and into the hall.

"Squall!" came Nida's voice. "Squall!"

"I'm going to punch that guy," Seifer growled. I lifted my hand in a dismissive wave and got a curse for it.

"Squall, come up to the bridge. Dr. Kadowaki is here."

"What does the doc want now?" Seifer asked, his tone hot. "She shouldn't be wandering around an active battlefield."

"You tell her that," I replied, already heading for the door to the hall. "I'll stand out of slapping distance."

"Hn."

"You really think she'd slap you?" Selphie asked, half a step behind Seifer, who was right on my heels. I didn't hear Seifer's reply, but Selphie let out a laugh that was quickly aborted and she dissolved into an uncontrolled series of coughs as she tried to recover.

"What's the situation?" Dr. Kadowaki asked when I greeted her. Quistis and Irvine looked at me and offered strained smiles.

 _Don't you already know?_ "We were able to stop the first two waves of the attack." I said lowly. "But our forces aren't looking good. Many are injured. If they send another wave, I don't know if we can hold them."

She nodded. "How's your team?"

"Bad." Selphie answered. "They're barely holding them off."

Dr. Kadowaki nodded. "So... looks like this is it."

"Their Garden has more experienced fighters." Quistis said, hugging herself. "On the other hand, most of our troops are students who are still in training. Like Squall said, one more wave and we might be finished."

Dr. Kadowaki frowned deeply. "There's no way we can run? No, of course not. Looks like it's now or never! You've come this far already. What is there to think about? Squall, you're not going to order a retreat, are you?"

I shook my head. "There's no point in retreating. It'd just delay the inevitable. Attacking now is going to be our only chance. Nida can crash into their Garden. I'm sure their pilot's been doing the same to us the entire time. The impact should ground both Gardens, giving us a chance to retaliate."

I turned at the same time as the others did and watched Zell come puffing up to us. He gave me an apologetic smile that looked like he wanted to just stop and cry. Had he had that expression Before? I hadn't noticed.

"Sorry, man." Zell said as he came close. "There's nothin' I can do! There's no way to get to the quad! Those bastards have the area barricaded. Man! The only way we can get to Rinoa is by going over the roof or flying there."

I nodded. I had expected a miracle, I suppose, but things were going along exactly as they had Before. I glanced at Seifer, noting his blank face. I couldn't figure out what was going through his mind now, and I wasn't sure I wanted to. To everyone else, it was like I was giving up on Rinoa, letting Fate take her. Seifer knew better, of course, but it was still hard. Even doing it a second time, it was hard on me.

Irvine reached to grab my shoulder. I avoided him, and his face twisted in a hateful scowl. "Wait a minute. You just gave up on Rinoa, didn't you? Listen... Do me a favor. _You_... go help Rinoa. It may be too late, but don't give up until you're _certain_ there's nothing more you can do!"

I looked at him, keeping my face icy. He flinched and stepped back away from me. "I _will_ rescue Rinoa. Don't doubt that. So all of you shut the hell up and let me do things my way!" I pinned each of them with a glower. Quistis, Selphie, and Zell each flinched at whatever expression I had on my face. Seifer's emerald eyes flashed, but he only folded his arms over his chest and canted his head to one side. "Until we stop Galbadia Garden's movement, there's nothing I, or anyone else, can do for her. That's the first thing we have to do. Irvine, I want you to lead everyone inside. Find somewhere safe and wait for us there. Seifer, you go with them."

"Sure, Ice Prince." Seifer's deep voice rolled through the room, a soft thunder in itself.

Irvine nodded. "Don't worry. I know the place like the back of my hand."

Quistis stepped forward, her arms moving like she wanted to embrace me but thought better of it. "We'll clear a path. Once you arrive, we'll move in."

I headed to the elevator then, my steps heavy. I wasn't surprised when Dr. Kadowaki joined me. I kept my silence, letting the doctor gather the courage to deal with me. "Squall," she started, "I know you're trying so hard to keep that cold facade, but you can't treat your comrades like that."

I glanced at her. "Exactly how do you want me to treat them? You heard Zell. There's nothing I can do right now, and I'm working with the situation as best I can."

"You're different, somehow." Dr. Kadowaki said suddenly, startling me somewhat. I looked at her, one eyebrow raised. "I'm not sure how, but it's... it's as if you're a different person."

"Maybe I am." I said honestly. "This is war. It changes people."

The doctor nodded. I could tell that I hadn't convinced her, though. But like everyone else, there were other things that needed her attention. The elevator locked into position on the pilot's deck, and I stepped up beside Nida. I grasped the microphone and hesitated. Before, I had made a speech that had far-reaching implications. My words would get good people hurt, even killed. I closed my eyes tightly. I could feel both Nida and Dr. Kadowaki watching my back, preparing to say something. I preempted them by thumbing on the microphone and lifting it to my lips.

"...Everybody, this is Squall. I know you're all exhausted. You're all probably too tired to even stand up after all this fighting. But... listen to me, everyone. We still have a chance to win, and I need your help to do it. This is going to be our final battle. We're going to attack them before they can come in again. To do that, we're going to head straight into their Garden. So I want everyone to prepare for a major collision. Take care of the junior classmen. Irvine, Quistis, Zell, Selphie, and Seifer will lead the attack into their Garden. As for everyone else, please support them if you can. SeeD was formed to fight sorceresses who turned away from the light, who turned away from everything that's good. Garden was created to train SeeDs. So this battle is Garden's destiny as much as it's ours. It's been a grueling battle already, but I need you to keep fighting. I need you to get up and protect the person to your left and to your right. You need to watch the back of the person in front of you. I don't want to have any regrets. I don't want anyone to look back and regret this day. So just this once, give everything you've got. Don't do it just for me, but for yourselves, for your friends, and for the people you care about."

I thumbed off the microphone and pressed it gently down onto the console. I took a step back and looked at both Nida and Dr. Kadowaki. Nida looked ready to cry and he was almost beaming. Even the doctor looked proud of me, a broad smile upon her face.

"You did great." Dr. Kadowaki said, her voice soft. "That was wonderful. Okay! Let's bash into them!"


	24. Chapter 24

Twenty-Four - Seifer POV

The second the two Gardens collided, I felt the rumble of machinery failing beneath my feet. I followed the others straight into the mouth of the beast then, Hyperion held low and held ready. Squall's words danced around in my head, echoing and reechoing. I didn't doubt that he'd made a similar speech Before. He didn't talk much, but when he did... Looking at the kids fighting all around me, I knew Squall had inspired in them something I could never do.

 _That's what Squall does._ Ifrit said. _He inspires. He makes people want to do better._

 _He's good like that._ I responded.

The fire Guardian Force laughed, but it was humorless. _Even Before, he fought to try and make you realize that. That he wanted you to be better than a slave._

I grimaced. _Rub it in, why don't you?_

This time Ifrit really did laugh with full humor and subsided to the edge of my consciousness. I shook my head and caught up with the others. Just before we went into Galbadia Garden, I turned around, squinting as I looked up toward the sky, seeking any sign of Squall and Rinoa. I didn't see shit, except for fighting everywhere. The smell of blood was thick in the air, mingling with the scents of gunpowder and fire. Even if I _did_ see them, what good would I be able to do? I'd probably get myself killed if I tried to get close. Grinding my teeth at my impotence, I stomped into Galbadia Garden and vented my frustration on the Galbadian soldiers that came up against us. Since I was spoiling for a fight, the small fry we faced only increased my frustration because they didn't last long enough for me to vent my aggression.

Then, we settled in to wait.

Squall and Rinoa showed up about twenty minutes later, looking windblown. Squall seemed to be sporting a few new bruises, but when I arched my brow he only shook his head. He refused to let me get close enough to get a good look, too, which pissed me off. I hated to see him hurt needlessly, especially since he knew when and how something was going to happen and could defend himself accordingly.

As one large group, we headed through the Garden, dispatching enemies as they came at us. I watched Squall most of all, watching the tenseness of his body increase with each step we took deeper into Galbadia Garden. He was preparing himself, physically, mentally, for the fight we were going to face soon. He was also preparing himself to be the catalyst for Rinoa's fate, which, if I had to be honest, was making me a little tense as well. Squall had described it to me, sure, but that didn't mean shit. I was going to witness it, firsthand. I was going to watch the sweet girl I knew become the vessel for a bloodthirsty bitch. I wanted to stop it. I wanted to protect her. But I couldn't. I had to let it happen, and that was what was bothering Squall twice as much as it was bothering me.

At last we made it to the center of the Garden. Squall seemed so still now, but I wondered if he'd shatter if I just reached out and poked his shoulder. He fell back to the rear of the group and met my gaze. I fell back as well, allowing the others to pass me. As soon as they were out of sight, I reached to grasp Squall's shoulder, pulled him close, and kissed him. He grasped at my coat, his knuckles no doubt white under the black leather of his gloves, and returned it. Then he pulled back and pressed his head against my chest, letting me see the pale expanse of the back of his neck.

"You all right?" I asked.

His shoulders lifted and fell.

"Well, I'd hate to see the other guy then."

A snort escaped him and he looked up at me, allowing me a better look at the bruises. They weren't as bad as I originally thought they would be. Squall brushed the bruise along his jaw with a featherlight touch. "I defended myself better this time." he said.

"I'm glad." And I meant it. Squall's eyes flicked down the hallway, as if he were counting the minutes before someone returned. "I noticed you gave Rinoa your ring."

"Griever, yeah." Squall blew out a sigh. "Zell asked me for it. For her. It doesn't mean anything."

"Gives her a big dose of courage. She keeps touching it."

"I know."

"You're not going to take it back?"

"Not yet."

"I'm guessing there's a reason for that?"

Squall looked up at me and tilted his head to one side. He didn't say a word. He pulled back from me, but he didn't go so far as to break the hold I had on him. He nodded slowly and reached up to take my hand in his, holding it tight.

I returned the grip, maybe a little tighter than I should have. He met my eyes again, searching my face for something. I grinned at him, bravado and sass driving it. There was a little twitch at the corners of his mouth, and there was a short-lived smile. Then he released my hand and pulled away from me. He gave me one last look, then headed down the hallway after the others. I followed, but my steps were heavy and my grip around Hyperion was tighter than before. I focused on Squall's backside, noting how his legs propelled him along only because he had to go forward to see this through.

The room we found ourselves was austere. It was done in soft pastels and draped with sheer cloth. A young man stood before a throne of sorts, bouncing a saber against his shoulder as he watched us approach. Behind him sat the sorceress Edea, our Matron, the woman who cared for us when we were little and let us go so we could be trained to kill women like her, sorceresses who had fallen from grace. I didn't recognize the kid, but Irvine seemed to, judging by the soft intake of breath. Perhaps it was some kid he knew from his school days here, I don't know. All I knew was that Ultimecia had found a new sap to become her knight, and he was standing where I would have, had not Squall force-junctioned Carbuncle to me. I was seeing this fight from Squall's perspective, seeing what he had seen. And I didn't like it.

Squall moved first. He burst into battle with a grace and skill others could only dream of having. The kid didn't stand a chance against Leonhart, and we all knew it. Selphie joined Squall in battle to act as his healer, and Zell added his brute force to the fight when Squall had to disengage in order to catch his breath. I stayed close to Rinoa, feeling a tight twisting in my stomach. Anticipation, fear, whatever else it was, it was gathering in a tight ball somewhere between my chest and my belly. I watched, because I couldn't make myself look away. This is what my fate had been. This is what I had faced, in Squall's past. I had been standing where that kid was. I was the one taking hit after hit from Lion Heart and Zell's fists. I was the one bleeding all over the floor and the one growing weaker and weaker as my former friends gave everything they had, praying this would be the last battle they would have to face.

I hadn't had a prayer in the world of surviving. Neither did the kid.

I remembered how to breathe. Rinoa gripped my arm, looking at me with concerned eyes. I shook my head and focused on Squall. It was him who delivered the final blow to the sorceress' knight, and the moment the kid collapsed, he stepped back and steeled himself to face Edea.

Edea's gaze swept over all of us and focused on me. Her lip curled slightly, and I felt a sudden pounding in my head. I fought to keep from reaching up to clutch my head, refusing to give her the satisfaction of seeing me flinch.

 _Get out!_ Carbuncle yelled suddenly, his fur on end and his ears back. _Get out of here! He doesn't belong to you! Get out!_

The pounding increased almost twofold and for a minute, I thought that Carbuncle was going to fail. Instead, the little GF gave an impressive growl and stood on four little paws, two sizes larger because of how puffed his fur was. A ripple went along his body and his little eyes narrowed.

 _He doesn't belong to you! He is not your knight! Go away!_

I focused on Edea, and for the first time, saw the sorceress Ultimecia behind those once-kind eyes. I bared my teeth and growled myself. I felt Rinoa's hands tighten around my arm and I drew strength from her touch.

 _Get out of my head!_ I screamed at the pressure bearing down on me. _I'm not your knight! I never was your knight! Leave me alone!_

The pressure vanished after that, and the contemptuous curl to Edea's lips increased. I felt Carbuncle collapse in my mind, and for a heart-stopping second, I thought the barrier he'd created around my thoughts had shattered. I felt Ifrit and the other GF's in my mind gathering around Carbuncle, worried about their friend. Carbuncle lifted his head and gave me a little furry smile, raising his paw as if he was trying to give me a thumb's up.

"Worthless child." Edea hissed. I looked toward her in time to see her sink through the floor.

Squall whirled to focus on me, his eyes slightly wide. I smirked at him and pulled away from Rinoa to stand under my own power. Rinoa glanced at Squall then back to me, looking even more worried. Squall started toward me and lightly brushed his fingers over the back of my arm. I nodded slightly, trying to convey to him that I was all right. I didn't know what my own reflection looked like, even though I could see myself reflected in his eyes. I doubted I looked good. The kids were quiet all around, as if they knew something had happened but couldn't figure out what, exactly. And none of them wanted to tempt fate with Squall.

Squall's gaze softened as he regarded me and he nodded in return. Then, without word, he left the room. I headed after him, with the others trailing behind me. We headed down to the auditorium then, but when we arrived, we were the only ones in the large room. It was too quiet and too still. I saw Squall hesitate for a second before he led the way down toward the podium. His shoulders grew tight. His step became more measured. And I knew, somehow, that this was the moment everything changed. I looked toward Rinoa, who was busy looking around the room with a confused kitten look on her face. I couldn't help the smile that blossomed on my face, only because, even after all she'd been through, Rinoa still seemed so innocent.

The sorceress crashed through the ceiling then, and landed on the podium, staring down at all of us.

"So," Edea breathed, her voice cold and cruel, "the time has come. You're the legendary SeeD destined to face me?"

I looked at Squall. His face remained impassive. _He knows this is his fault. Everything he's done up to this point is all because of the choices he's made. And despite that, he's still going forward._

"I must say that I am impressed." Edea/Ultimecia swept her arms wide. "...An impressive nuisance. Your life ends here, SeeD."

I heard soft gasps as the kid we'd defeated upstairs shambled up to Edea's side, looking half-dead and determined to fulfill the role the sorceress had granted him. I didn't want to look at him and know that, Before, that had been _me_ standing there. That had been _me_ looking that beat up and pathetic. Squall said he had wanted to rescue me for selfish reasons, and now I understood what another one of those reasons were: he didn't want me to become a shadow of myself, a pathetic used-up piece of man with nothing left except a dark legacy behind him and no future ahead of him. The kid probably wouldn't even remember what had happened to him when all of this was over, and the world would never know who he was. He wouldn't have the black cloud of being a sorceress' knight hanging over him, and even if he did, no one would blame him. I hadn't had that luxury, Squall had said. My face was everywhere. The world knew my name. This time around, he had saved me from all that, but in turn created a whole new unknown future.

Edea's eyes slid to her knight, and that contemptuous look spread across her face again. "Worthless fool."

I growled despite myself, brandishing Hyperion. That movement alone seemed to draw her attention to me, and that was when Squall moved.

He engaged in battle with her so swiftly that the kid didn't have a chance to get in between them and stop Squall's advance. He was still wounded from the first battle, and didn't last long in this second one. Squall didn't even seem to need any backup as he flew into a Renzokuken, his limit break destroying the knight before the kid even knew that death was knocking on his door. When the kid collapsed on the ground, unmoving, Squall turned his rage onto Edea. She wasn't Matron to him. She wasn't even Edea. She was Ultimecia, a sorceress from the future, who was hellbent on destroying our world and was determined to use everything she could to do it. She was nothing but an obstacle before him, something that had to be taken down in order for him to be able to move forward.

Between the rest of us adding in backup whenever Squall needed time to recover, Edea didn't last long. I was almost afraid we truly had killed her when she started moaning and groaning and writhing around like she was having some sort of epileptic fit. Her body arched backwards so violently then that I swore her spine snapped, and a huge cloud of gas exploded out of her before she collapsed. I saw Squall throw his arm up over his face, but it didn't seem to do him any good.

Didn't do the rest of us any good either.

My body became incredibly heavy. I spat out a colorful curse - or tried to. I couldn't speak. I couldn't move. The others collapsed one by one, unable to move, unable to do anything. I fell to my knees, stubbornly staying upright even though the weight was unbearable. Squall was also on his knees, a look of pure determination on his face. His eyes weren't focused on Edea, though. They were focused on Rinoa.

Even though he had told me, had prepared me for it in his own way, it still shook me to the core to see Rinoa weaving drunkenly away from us and toward the kid that lay incredibly still on the floor in front of us. I watched as Rinoa knelt beside his body and lifted him up, cradling him gently. I watched in shocked horror as her head bowed and their lips met. The kid's eyes fluttered open, and he pushed himself upright, away from Rinoa. I caught a glimpse of Rinoa's face then, as she watched the kid, her knight, walk away, saw the cruel smile upon her lips, saw the bright gold hue of her eyes burning with hate. It lasted only a few seconds, but I knew we had succeeded. That Squall had succeeded. Rinoa was now a sorceress. She was now the vessel for Ultimecia. I turned my eyes toward Squall, and as much as I loved him, I hated him so much in that moment. Not even a second later, the weight bearing down on all of us vanished and Rinoa collapsed to the side.

Quistis was the first to Rinoa's side, followed by the others. I barely listened to what they said to her, barely listened to her responses, if she made any. Squall stepped past the group, ignoring Rinoa and her plight, and instead moved toward Edea's side, kneeling down to help the woman sit up. Edea looked shocked to see Squall so close to her, steadying her as she sought to gain her feet.

"Squall," Edea breathed. Her head turned to take in her surroundings, spotting the rest of us as she did so. "Quistis, Selphie. Irvine. Zell. Seifer. You've all grown so much... and become so strong... I have waited for this day to come. And also feared this day would come. Is today a joyous day? Or an odious day?" She turned to Squall suddenly, gripping his shoulders as she seemed to sag. "Where is Ellone!? Have I protected Ellone!?"

I watched Squall bend his head to Edea's ear and whispered something. Edea's eyes widened, then filled with tears, and she turned into Squall, hugging him tightly. Squall looked up at me then, meeting my eyes. His expression was carefully blank as he regarded me. I wasn't sure what kind of expression was on my face, and I really wasn't sure what I was feeling, anyway.

"Squall!" Quistis cried, leaning back from the unconscious form of Rinoa on the floor. "It's Rinoa..."


	25. Chapter 25

Twenty-Five - Squall POV

I wasn't surprised that Seifer chose to stay in the infirmary with Rinoa rather than confronting me about it. I suppose I couldn't have asked for a better reaction. Though I had described everything to him, there was still a huge difference between comprehending something told to you and seeing it for yourself. Intellectually, Seifer had understood what I had said and what needed to be done, and he had been fine with it. But then he had experienced it, had seen everything he had done Before, had watched everything I had gone through already, and lived it for himself. It bothered him. _I_ bothered him. He wouldn't say anything about it until he figured out things for himself, but I knew my strength and my willingness to sacrifice a friend, even for a short amount of time, was disconcerting to him.

I found myself wandering around the grounds of the ruined orphanage, staring at things that had been much larger the last time I had been here. I'd been much smaller then, uncertain about my future and scared of being alone. I had endured the loneliness, came to believe I could rely on no one but myself, and then forgot everything due to the Guardian Forces I had junctioned with. Now I was reliving it all, remembering everything, and it hurt. Hurt more than I thought it would, even after preparing myself for that pain.

 _You can't blame yourself, Squall._ Shiva said, her voice soft in my mind. _You've done what you came back to do, and you're striving now to make sure it stays the way it needs to be. Whatever happens, you must stay strong._

 _I know. But strength alone doesn't stop pain._

Shiva agreed silently. So did the other Guardian Forces that remained with me. I continued wandering, seeing without really seeing, and then I stopped suddenly. Unconsciously, I had entered the courtyard where I had stood - or would stand, depending on how you looked at it - years ago and gave Matron the idea for SeeD. I looked up at the sky, at the broken ruins of the courtyard, and my chest grew tight. If it hadn't been for me meddling in time, SeeD never would have been created. If it hadn't been for me saying anything to Matron, she never would have been set on the path to be possessed by Ultimecia. She never would have inherited Ultimecia's powers. Maybe I would never have been sent away to Garden. Maybe Sis would've told Laguna about me and he would've come and got me.

Maybe, maybe, maybe. What if.

Whatever.

I could only change the things I could now. Change my future by living in my new present. I couldn't go all the way back and "fix" what was "broken". Ellone had tried that already, and it had taken her months to figure out that the past could only be viewed with her powers, not changed. The only reason I had been able to get around that was because my entire physical being had been sent back to the beginning of all this, thanks to the Time Compression. That was it. And I was lucky to have survived it.

My eyes stung. It was an odd, slightly familiar feeling.

 _You're alone._ Bahamut growled. I couldn't help but smile, even as tears began to streak down my face. As much as the king of dragons hated seeing any sign of weakness in me, he also had a compassionate side that manifested itself in small ways. Like this.

I crouched where I stood and wrapped my arms around my shins. I pressed my forehead to my knees, squeezed my eyes shut, and shook as I silently cried. I was frustrated, terrified, angry, sad - so many emotions coursed through me that I had repressed until now, because I _had_ to be strong. I hadn't had _time_ to be scared or angry - never mind any earlier shouting - because I needed to get to this moment in time. The uphill battle was all but over. It was now a downhill runaway train speeding with full-force toward Time Compression. Toward a new uncertain future, one where even I might not survive this time around.

Strong arms wrapped around me, startling me and making me jerk. I lifted my head just enough to see greyish-white coat sleeves through the cloud of tears, and I dropped my head again. Seifer's warmth pressed into my back, his chin rested on my shoulder, his scent filled my nose, and I couldn't keep quiet anymore.

Seifer pulled me tighter against him and said nothing.

Even after I quieted, he continued to hold me, just kneeling there behind me with his arms wrapped around me. Then, slowly, he released me and stood up. I dried my eyes and face on the sleeve of my coat and took a deep breath before I slowly stood. Then I looked up at Seifer.

His expression was blank. He regarded me coolly, as if he were trying to figure out what to say and couldn't think of anything. There was no smirk, not even a little twinkle in his green eyes, which were chips of emerald ice. I probably looked more human in contrast.

"Quistis sent me to look for you," Seifer said at last, sounding slightly annoyed. "No one could find you. Wasn't surprised to find you here."

I shrugged, as if to say 'where else would I be?'

"Edea is here too. Everyone else will be arriving shortly."

I nodded.

"It's not your fault."

I looked up at him, frowning.

Seifer ran a hand through his hair. "Fucking Hyne, Squall, I signed up for this when you told me everything. Maybe I didn't fully believe the gravity of the situation of our royally fucked up lives then, but the more I watched you, the more convinced I became that you were doing the only thing you knew how to make things right. You saved my sorry ass from what fate wanted to deal me. That kid," he pointed over his shoulder as if his replacement as Sorceress' Knight was right behind him, "he won't suffer like me. No one knows his name. No one knows his face. His name won't be all over the news and his face won't be plastered all over the t.v. He'll go down in history as some nameless sap that got suckered into doing some bad shit, but no one will blame him. _That's_ what you rescued me from. You risked everything for me. And now you're trying to keep the status quo, which is fucking amazing, because you know everything that's going to happen from here on out. You must have a will like iron, because I know I'd be doing everything I could to prevent shit that you let happen. You told me about Rinoa, and, fuck, I don't know what I thought! I thought you'd try to protect her, that you'd try to keep it from happening, and when you didn't..." He blew out a breath.

I looked away.

Seifer's hand caught my chin and forced me to look at him. Instead of his eyes being twin chips of ice, they were filled with fire. He kissed me, hard, almost bruisingly so, crushing me against him so I couldn't escape. I don't remember how long it lasted - scant seconds, forever - before Seifer pulled back from me and stared down at me.

"You're falling headlong down the same path, aren't you?" he asked me. "You're going to make sure everything goes the way it's supposed to, just with a few minor changes."

I nodded. Then I sucked in a deep breath and blew it out in a long sigh. "Ultimecia is still a threat. She's not going to just... go away. I have to kill her."

"What do you mean, you have to?"

I stepped back from him. "Do you believe things are preordained? Like someone already decided what we're going to do before we do it?"

Seifer snorted. "I've never felt like I was someone's puppet. Except for that once, which we will never mention again."

I smirked, but it was short lived. "Time is a funny thing. The past can't be changed, but it can influence the future. Edea's idea for SeeD came from me. During Time Compression, I was sent back to a time when I was maybe five. I'd run away from here to look for Ellone, and Matron came looking for me. She found me, just _this_ me." I gestured to my chest. "When I realized she didn't recognize me at this age, I avoided telling her my name, but I told her I was a SeeD from Balamb Garden."

Understanding filled Seifer's eyes. "She realized then you were from the future, because Garden didn't exist when we were little."

I nodded. "Ultimecia followed me, and as she lay dying, Matron inherited her powers so Ultimecia could die in peace, and so that none of the girls became a sorceress. I was sent back to the wasteland, and then the beginning of all this. I don't know why."

Seifer frowned and folded his arms over his chest. "You said Time Compression fucked with everything. You can't blame yourself, Squall. The one you really have to blame is Ultimecia. She's the one who started it all in the first place. We would've gone on living our lives as happy little mercenaries if she hadn't managed to body-snatch Edea."

"Like I said. Past influences the future. It all circles around back to me."

"I don't get it."

"It's hard to explain... I'm..." I paused, sighing. "My father's the cause, Sis is the catalyst, and I'm the cure." I said at last, after a beat of silence. "Someone's going to come looking for us."

Seifer stared at me, then nodded. He moved closer to me and drew me tight against him again, running his fingers through my hair and cupping his hand against the back of my head. "Let's go get our princess back." he said softly.

"She's our sorceress," I corrected lamely.

"To borrow your line, whatever."

We parted then and headed into the orphanage to join the others in the main building. Cid was already there, smiling nervously at all of us. He wrung his hands in front of him, his body tense. "...Many thanks for your heard work." he started, his nervous smile becoming a nervous grin. "...Hahaha... Are you angry with me? Haha... I don't blame you. All I do is talk big, but in times of trouble, I run away. I was in a no-win situation... Your defeat would be the end of you. Your victory would mean losing my wife. I just couldn't bear... to face either outcome. I don't care about myself... But... please forgive Edea..."

"Headmaster," I said quietly, making everyone look toward me. I don't know what they saw on my face - evidence of tears, pure exhaustion, maybe both - but their expressions seemed to soften, "we don't blame you or Edea. It is what it is. We are what we are."

Cid gave me a wobbly smile, then led us to Edea, who waited with her hands clasped before her, her amber gaze soft and loving, just as we remembered.

When she saw us, a brilliant smile bloomed on her face and tears filled her eyes. "My children... Please forgive me... I raised you as my own, yet still, I..."

I said quietly, "It's not your fault."

"We fought you, too, knowing you were our Matron." Zell said. The others echoed similar words, or simply murmured her name.

"You weren't in control of your actions," Seifer said, his voice rumbling through the room like soft thunder. "I know how that is."

Edea smiled at all of us, but it gentled somewhat when she regarded Seifer. "You are SeeDs. You cannot back out of a battle, I know. You were magnificent. However, it is not over yet. At any time, I may... ...I have been possessed all this time. I was at the mercy of Sorceress Ultimecia. Ultimecia is a sorceress from the future. A sorceress many generations ahead of our time. Ultimecia's objective is to find Ellone. She is after Ellone's mysterious power. I know Ellone very well. Ultimecia is a very fearful sorceress. Her heart is filled with anger and hate. There was no way I was going to let Ultimecia get a hold of Ellone. The only thing I could do was... ...Surrender my soul to Ultimecia and lose control of my mind. That was the only way I could save Ellone. And the end result... Well, you all know. The Sorceress that appeared in Galbadia was in fact Ultimecia... inside my shell... Ultimecia has yet to achieve her goal. I believe she may use my body again to carry out her plains. I plan to make a stand this time, but... if that does not work... I may have to face you in battle once again. I ask for your support, young SeeDs. Have you all heard of Sorceress Adel before? She was the ruler of Esthar during the Sorceress War. No one knows of her whereabouts... That's what I learned. The Galbadians must have thought I was the sorceress who received Sorceress Adel's powers. However, that is not the case. I received the powers of the previous sorceress at the age of five."

I looked over at Seifer and tilted my head to the side as everyone else asked questions of Edea. He gave me a slight nod and made a gesture surreptitiously with his fingers. While he didn't understand my role in all of this, he understood now what I meant when I had said how the past influenced the future.

Edea continued, "I believe Sorceress Adel is still alive. And that Ultimecia released my body in order to... ...To use the body of Sorceress Adel... Sorceress Adel is the type who will not hesitate to use her powers for her own selfish desires. Should Sorceress Ultimecia from the future bequeath her anger and hatred unto Adel, their power would be unimaginable..."

"I don't think using Adel is Ultimecia's ultimate goal." I said, somehow managing to keep my voice neutral. Edea looked at me, confused. I felt everyone else turn to look at me as well. I leaned against a nearby wall and folded my arms over my chest. "Matron, have you ever heard of Time Compression?"

"Um," interrupted Zell, "what's Time Compression?"

"It's time magic. Past, present, and future get compressed." Edea's eyes widened. "But... that's incredibly dangerous! Why would she..." Her hand flew to her mouth, covering it as if to silence herself. "Ultimecia's objective is to find Ellone."

I nodded. "Sis' power. She can send someone's consciousness back into the past."

"So, Ultimecia wants to use Ellone's power, right?"

"I get it." Irvine said. "Ultimecia wants to send her consciousness from this period further into the past."

"What's she going to do in the past?"

Edea's eyes focused on me. "You can't believe that, Squall. No one would be crazy enough to do that, even her."

"You said it yourself, Matron. Ultimecia is a being consumed by anger and hate, but she's controlled by her fear. With as much power as she has, she's doing the only thing she believes available to her." I said. "She's trying to destroy what's making her so afraid."

Matron continued to stare at me. Her amber eyes started to water, and she quickly blinked the tears away. "But that's..."

I pushed away from the wall. "Ellone is safe. You're safe, Edea. Right now, there's nothing Ultimecia can do. I'm going to head back to Garden and let everyone know what's happened." I looked at everyone else, lifting my shoulders in a slight shrug. "You guys can stay here or follow me as you want. We won't be going anywhere until tomorrow."

I left the orphanage then and headed back to Balamb Garden. I wasn't surprised when Seifer was the only one to follow me out, and as he shut the door behind him, I could hear Selphie's voice raising in excitement before it was cut off. I waited for Seifer to catch up to me before walking on. He kept pace beside me, hands shoved into his coat pockets. He didn't speak at all.

I made my report to the entire school over the announcement system, but avoided saying anything about where to find Ellone. I knew where she was. I had told her to go straight to Esthar and stay with Laguna until I came to get her. When I finished, I met Seifer in the hallway and together we headed down to the infirmary to look in on Rinoa. Her condition hadn't changed in the slightest, and I wasn't really surprised about that. She wouldn't become active again until I got her close enough to Adel's prison in space. I sat heavily in a chair beside Rinoa's bed and leaned my head back, closing my eyes for a brief minute. Seifer sat beside me, holding onto his silence. His eyes were on Rinoa, though, as if he were expecting her to leap up at any minute and tell us it was all a big joke she was helping me play on him. But she remained inert, cold and still, in her coma-like trance as her body adjusted itself to the consciousness she had been forced to inherit.

"So what now?" Seifer asked.

"We head to Esthar."

"Is that where Ellone is?"

"She should be. Or I'm going to beat her senseless." I growled.

Seifer chuckled. "I'd like to see that."

"And if he's let her do anything or go anywhere, I'm going to beat him senseless, too."

"Who?"

"My father."

Seifer looked at me sharply, confusion back in his eyes along with a sharpness that told me he wasn't going to let me weasel out of explaining this time. "Is your dad in Esthar?"

"..." I nodded.

"Does he live there, or something?"

"You could say that." I focused on Rinoa's face then, as if her countenance would make it easier for me to explain this. "...You remember Matron saying Adel was the ruler of Esthar back during the Sorceress War?"

"Yeah. What's that got to do with your dad being in Esthar?"

I sighed. "Before I was born, when Sis was maybe seven or so, Esthar kidnapped her. My dad left to go find her and bring her home. He succeeded... and aided a civil war while he did it. He helped overthrow Adel."

"Well, if you're anything to judge him by, then he's got to be pretty badass."

I couldn't help it. I burst out laughing so hard that I doubled over and almost fell out of my chair. Seifer looked at me, his expression like a confused and hurt puppy. I forced myself to sober and sucked in a deep gulp of air as I sat upright again. "Laguna Loire is many things, but he's definitely _not_ a badass. I look more like my mother, anyway." I breathed deeply a few more times and managed to stop laughing. "After defeating Adel, the people of Esthar decided to instate him as its new ruler. Its President."

Seifer's mouth dropped open and he stared at me for a long while. He closed his mouth and folded his arms over his chest, slouching in his chair grumpily. "And just _when_ were you going to tell me that?"

"..."

"When it was relevant? You don't think I ought to know that I'm going to be walking into your dad's country and we might just cross paths?"

I smiled.

"Of course I wouldn't keep my mouth shut. I really hope you _do_ look like your mom, because if you got all that," his hand waved up and down from my head to my toes and back again, "from your _dad_ , there's seriously something wrong with the world!"

I smiled wider.

"Fuck."

I looked toward Rinoa and felt my mirth slip away. "Seifer."

He looked at me, emerald eyes serious.

I met his gaze. "I'm going to need you the most going forward now. I'm going to need you to watch my back more than ever."

"Are you going to do crazy shit that's going to make me hate you?"

"Definitely."

Seifer inhaled deeply and blew out a long sigh. "All right. But I want something in return. I've gone along with you so far without thinking about it, but now I definitely want something back for my good behavior."

I arched my eyebrow at him, curious and afraid all at once. I wasn't sure what Seifer was thinking, or what he had come up with during his time silently watching me maneuver through events with an almost mechanical precision.

He finally looked at me and held up a finger to silence any protests I might make. "You don't have to say anything. Talking's not your strong suit anyway." He smirked as I narrowed my eyes at him. "When this is all over, when we've finally destroyed this Ultimecia bitch and we can have all of twenty minutes of peace to ourselves, promise me this: meet me at the secret place in the training center. If you promise, kiss me."

I rose slowly from my chair and shifted closer to him. I wrapped my arms around his shoulders as I straddled his lap. I felt his arms come around my waist and hold loosely onto me. I pressed my forehead to his so that I could stare into his deep green eyes. Then I pressed my lips to his. It was a fleeting touch, but it was enough. I pulled back from him and he let me go, allowing me to leave the infirmary. It was time to go to Esthar.


	26. Chapter 26

Twenty-Six - Seifer POV

Squall didn't waste any time getting Nida to take us to Fisherman's Horizon. Once there, he packed up the kids, Edea, Rinoa, and myself, and ushered us all off Balamb Garden and onto the tracks overlooking FH. He pointed then, and said, "We'll follow the tracks that way. Esthar's pretty far, so if you're having second thoughts, you can stay here."

Of course, no one was having those 'second thoughts'. Everyone wanted to see the legendary city of Esthar, the city that was so xenophobic that it wouldn't even allow traders in, let alone a group of heavily armed teenagers and a sorceress. Hell, _I_ wasn't even having second thoughts, even though I knew what we were heading into. I closed my eyes briefly and allowed myself to feel again the touch of Squall's lips against mine, the rough, chapped flesh pressing lightly against my skin. His promise. That meant more to me that anything else right now.

Squall opted to carry Rinoa piggyback rather than use a stretcher or allow anyone else (especially me) to touch her. I caught the looks Quistis and Selphie gave Squall's back, and interpreted them as "aw, how romantic!" It made me grimace, which earned a look from Squall. I shrugged and grinned at him. He rolled his eyes and led our ragtag parade down the tracks, sticking to the front and letting the rest of us fall in where we may.

"You two are still fighting," Matron said sadly. "I would have thought you would have been friends by now."

I looked down at the woman who had raised me my entire young life. "We only fight because he stands up to me. It makes life interesting."

Edea frowned and met my gaze. Her golden eyes searched my face, trying to figure out the mystery I was presenting her. Her lips pressed into a thin line as the answer continued to remain elusive. "There's something different about you." she said at last.

"Oh, yeah?" I grinned at her.

An elegant eyebrow rose. Then a knowing smile spread across her face as she looked from me to Squall, who continued to trudge ahead of us without showing any sign of weariness. As if sensing her stare, Squall paused to look back at us, his stormy gaze switching from me to Edea and back again. His expression became that of a confused kitten, wanting to be let in on the secret but not quite sure he'd like the answer. With a shake of his head, Squall continued walking, hitching Rinoa up higher on his back.

Edea looked back at me, that knowing smile still on her face. "Good for you, Seifer. Good for you."

"Thanks... what?" I said, a shocked tone in my voice.

Edea laughed, a warm, rich sound. "When you two were little, you'd argue and fight from sunup to sundown, but heaven forbid I try to separate the two of you even for time out. It was like watching night and day. For all of Squall's silence, you made up for it in spades."

I rubbed the back of my head. I didn't remember anything she was describing, but I figured she was telling the truth, only because Squall and I had been at each other's throats as long as I could remember. It was only now - after Squall had lived all this once before - that we were working together as well as we could. Which mostly meant me following Squall's orders without much questioning or complaining.

To avoid letting my embarrassment get the better of me, I asked, "So why are you going with us to Esthar, Matron?"

Edea's smile became troubled. "I must go see Doctor Odine."

"Who?"

"Dr. Odine." Zell said, coming abreast of Edea and me. "You've heard the name, right?"

"Humor me, chicken-wuss, and assume I haven't."

Zell glowered at me and looked to Edea like she was going to reprimand me. When there was no movement from her other than to give Zell an encouraging smile, Zell blew out a breath. "You know the famous Odine brand, don't you?" He waved his hand in the air like he was trying to will a piece of this Odine brand out of thin air. "That's all Dr. Odine's work. When it comes to knowledge about the sorceress, he's number one..."

I nodded, fully understanding now. I looked at Edea. "So that's why you need to see him, huh? Because he's pretty much the expert when it comes to all things sorceress."

Edea nodded slowly. She clasped her hands together against her stomach. "Sorceress Ultimecia is alive. She is able to take control of my body at any time. If that were to happen... I would once again bring terror. I, too, value my well-being. I want to protect myself. If it were possible, I would like to rid myself of the sorceress' power. Doctor Odine may know a way. He may be able to save me."

I glanced toward Squall, who was continuing to walk forward with Rinoa laying limply across his back. "Then let's get to Esthar. Sooner we do that, sooner we might be able to go home."

Edea smiled brightly at me, and seeing the hope in her eyes made me hate myself a little bit. I knew what was going to happen from here on out, only because Squall had told me. I wasn't so naive as to believe he had told me everything, though. He had left out details that he would let come to light in their own time. I found myself hoping that everything would work out this time, that he wouldn't find all his efforts being for nothing. I guess that was what my role was going to be from here on out - protecting the guy who was trying to protect us.

We stopped to rest close to sunset, and Selphie and Irvine volunteered to go ahead. As they disappeared into the distance, Squall set Rinoa down and stretched to loosen muscles gone tight by carrying his burden for such a long distance. I started toward Squall, but instead of touching him, I crouched down beside Rinoa, studying her angelic, sleeping face. Squall was staring off into the distance, as if watching for Irvine and Selphie's return. I knew he was trying to steel himself for what was to come, for what he was going to have to do while we were in Esthar. I glanced up at him, studying the cold lines of his face, seeing the blankness for what it really was. He was trying to bury expectations and his wants beneath the heavy mantle of what he needed to do to see success. He was trying to tell himself that it was his duty to see this through, that it was his duty to sacrifice any wants and needs he might have to ensure the safety of his team, of me, of this innocent girl that got caught up in this story of ours. He looked down at me then, his icy blue-grey eyes studying my face. I didn't expect him to say anything.

I smirked. "She's cute when she's sleeping, isn't she?"

He rolled his eyes and looked away from me.

"Are you blushing?"

His eyes narrowed.

I laughed. "I know, I know. I'm the only one who can make you do that."

He looked back at me and raised an eyebrow. I grinned at him. He only rolled his eyes and folded his arms over his chest.

I rose and stood beside him, looking for the return of the intrepid explorers myself. "If you know where it is, why let them run off?"

"Because," Squall started, his voice quiet, "I wanted to take a moment to breathe. She doesn't look it, but Rinoa's heavy."

I laughed, earning a few worried looks from those who had remained behind with us. Even Edea looked over at us, a confused expression on her face. Squall pointedly ignored me, making it seem like _I_ was the one who had found something terribly amusing about the whole situation rather than the words he'd said. I sobered quickly enough, though I couldn't stop the grin from staying on my face. "I could carry her for you," I offered.

Squall shook his head. "I'm fine. I've done it before."

"That was Before," I said, accenting the word, "when everyone thought you and she were the perfect couple. The good sorceress and her knight. If I'm going to be Rinoa's knight too, then it's only fair that I carry her."

Squall looked up at me with a strange expression to his eyes. His lips curled downward slightly, as if he were trying to frown but hadn't quite committed to the expression. Finally, he shrugged. "If you want to."

"Hey, if anyone is going to get to sit back and watch the great Commander Leonhart in action, it's going to be me. That way, I can appreciate you from afar."

His lips twitched into a smile and there was the faintest touch of pink to his cheeks. He shook his head, keeping his silence this time.

It didn't take long for Selphie and Irvine to return. Squall, of course, wasn't surprised by their report that they couldn't find the city of Esthar anywhere, north or south, so it was agreed that we would try going east. Squall didn't argue with them. He only looked at me, then glanced at Rinoa. With a soft grunt (Hyne, she _was_ heavy!) I picked Rinoa up and hauled her onto my back, piggyback style, like Squall had been carrying her. Then we headed east from Seaside Station, with Squall slightly in the lead. He kept his silence even as Selphie and Irvine chatted about the nothing they had found, sounding confused the entire time. I mean, how could a city as large as Esthar just not be anywhere to be found? Squall wasn't forthcoming in his explanation, big surprise there, but his stride was confident and he wasn't glancing back at me to make sure I was still behind him with Rinoa. He trusted me to be at his back, trusted me to take care of our princess. And we still had a long way to go.

We ended up at a long, blank stretch of land that was the Great Salt Lake. Selphie let out a low whistle and raised a hand to cover her eyes. "Hello..." she said, her voice curious and worried, "I don't see a city..."

Irvine lightly touched her shoulder, and with a glance toward Squall for permission, the two of them headed off to run ahead again, disappearing into the distance.

Edea let out a long sigh. "Looks like we are in for a long trip."

"Everything'll be all right." Zell said, his tone confident. "We'll be by your side all the way!"

Edea smiled at him, but it was sad, her golden eyes worried. "Thank you Zell. But remember, you must stay alert even in my presence. As long as I can be myself, everything will be fine. But if Ultimecia gets inside me again... You all know what to do..."

"Matron," Squall said, breaking his silence for the first time since the station, "you don't have to worry about Ultimecia anymore. She won't bother you again."

Edea's sad smile turned confused, but before she could press Squall for answers, Selphie and Irvine returned. Selphie's broad grin lessened until it vanished completely from her face and she looked between all of us, as if trying to glean the answer from our expressions. "What, what, did I miss something? Uh-oh, it's so quiet. The air's getting heavy. Guys... What's wrong? COME ON! We're all together again! We're gonna bring back Rinoa! It's like a picnic! We're gonna have fun!"

Squall sighed silently. "...Somebody once told me that if you mention bad things, they'll come true. I know it's a silly superstition, but right now I want to believe it. So let's not talk about it anymore."

He started forward as he said this, making the rest of us fall into step behind him. We crossed through the Great Salt Lake, always heading deeper into it. Squall seemed to know where he was going, so no one questioned him or his confidence. When he unsheathed Lion Heart about halfway in, I knew something was about to happen. Squall was the only one to be able to keep some semblance of balance when the ground began to shake, and I could see him grimace in a mix of annoyance and irritation. I almost felt bad for the Abadon that attacked us, watching Squall, Selphie, and Zell engage the creature. Being undead, the monster was susceptible to healing magic and healing items, and it didn't take long before it was dead (re-dead?) and we were moving on.

Squall stopped suddenly and the rest of us ranged around him, looking confused. Hell, even _I_ thought Squall was going crazy when he started to look around at the horizon like there was something actually in front of him. None of us could see anything but the distant horizon and the landscape surrounding us. Squall seemed unfazed by the fact that we were surrounded by nothing, and continued to seem unfazed even as the kids questioned his sanity aloud when he started pawing at what seemed to be thin air. Hell, even _I_ thought he had finally lost it.

Then he looked at me, pinning me with that stormy gaze of his. "...There's something here."

As if to accent his words, a hole opened up in the nothing that was before us. I let out a string of curses that was accompanied by various exclamations by the others, and Squall just looked at me with a smug (for Squall) expression, as if he was daring me to question him again.

"Come on." Squall said. He didn't wait for us to agree; he climbed into the hole and disappeared into the murk.

One by one the others followed him, with me and my unconscious burden bringing up the rear. Squall was waiting for us beside a lift, his arms crossed over his chest in that familiar nervous gesture. I wondered if he was nervous about something other than meeting his dad for the first (well, second) time, but I didn't bother to ask. I wasn't supposed to know that, after all. We boarded the lift with Squall being the last. He didn't pay much attention as the lift zoomed us through a tunnel, causing many more exclamations from the others and expletives from me. When the lift finally stopped, a door opened and a walkway stretched out before us. Squall said nothing as he led the way down the walkway and into another tunnel. We came to a dead end.

Squall didn't say anything. He didn't need to. We had come too far to give up now, and even though we were looking out upon nothing, Squall's quiet confidence kept us from attempting to turn around and leave.

It was a good thing we didn't.

The dead end wasn't that at all. The air before us began to shimmer and shake, and at last disappeared, revealing that the salt lake wasn't endless at all, but a visual trick. A giant city revealed itself, sparkling like a jewel in the sunlight. I felt my jaw drop open in surprise at the sight of the place, staring at all of the metal and tall buildings and technology I'd never seen before. This was Esthar? This place? This was the city that Squall's dad, Laguna Loire, ruled?

Holy shit.

The lift started to move again, going faster and faster, though I didn't feel a change in speed at all. It finally stopped at a platform far below where we originally had been. We got off, one by one, and stood on the platform, facing a closed tunnel that led deeper into Esthar. Everything seemed quiet, too quiet, and I could feel myself tensing the longer we were left out there, waiting.

Out of the corner of my eye, I caught Squall beginning to sway. There was an expression on his face that said he was going to kill someone, and I realized immediately that Ellone was trying to reach him in the only way she knew how. Was she in danger? Was she simply trying to communicate with Squall? I didn't have time to answer those questions and Squall was in no condition to do so either. I spun as Squall started to go down, and I grabbed him around the shoulders with my free arm. Everyone else seemed shocked as we both went down to our knees. I grunted as I hit, but Squall had already slipped under. His head lolled against my shoulder, his body limp and unresponsive. The others gathered around us, looking concerned and questioning me about Squall's condition, but I didn't have any answers for them. I could only hope that Squall would come back to us soon.


	27. Chapter 27

Twenty-Seven - Squall POV

I knew the feeling before it had even fully formed. Ellone was drawing me into the dream world. I wasn't sure if she knew I was here in Esthar, or if she was being forced to use her powers on me, or if she was simply trying to contact me. She hadn't reached out to me for a while, hadn't made me relive my father's past, nor had spoken with me through the link we had until now. It was enough to make me worry. I saw Seifer reaching toward me as I went down, but that was all I remembered before the darkness took me.

 _Sis?_

She sensed my fear. Her voice echoed through my mind, apologetic. _I'm sorry, Squall. This is the only way I can reach you right now. I wanted to talk to you._

 _You couldn't wait until we saw each other face to face?_

 _You're in Esthar?_

 _I told you I'd come for you._

Her apologetic tone changed to nervous. _That's what I told him. Uncle Laguna didn't believe me. He didn't believe me, either, when I said you were the one who told me to do it._

I wasn't surprised. _You're on Lunar Base, aren't you?_

 _H-how did you know? Squall? Squall, what's going on? I've done what you asked, but now I want some answers. I was too scared before, but now I want to know. How did you recognize me in the infirmary? It's been years since we've seen each other! How did you know Uncle Laguna is your father? You've never met him. How do you know about Lunar Base?_

I was silent for a long time. I had only told Seifer about all of this. Well. Most of it, anyway. I had wanted to keep it all to myself, because I wanted to ensure the timeline stayed relatively the same. I didn't want to drag anyone else into this with me, especially Ellone. I needed her. If she refused to fulfill her role, then I would lose Rinoa. I would lose Seifer. I would lose everyone I cared about. I would lose my world, this new world that I had fought so hard for. I would be more than likely killed, Ultimecia would win, and everything would be for nothing.

But if I didn't tell her, Ellone was likely to refuse on principle until I _did_ tell her, and then I would have to tell everyone, since we would all be together. I didn't know which was worse.

 _Squall?_

 _Ellone, if you were given a second chance to save someone you loved, would you do it?_

 _What do you mean?_

 _Exactly what I said. If you had been given the chance to go back and save your parents or my mother or make sure that you were never captured in the first place, would you do it?_

Now she was silent. _That's not possible, Squall. The past can't be changed. I learned that when I sent you into the past to try and stop Uncle Laguna from leaving Aunt Raine alone._

 _It is possible. Time Compression makes all of that possible._

 _Time Compression?_

I took a deep breath, more to steady myself than to prepare for a long-winded explanation. But I told her. I told her everything. Unlike with Seifer, I didn't leave out a single detail this time. I wasn't sure what she was thinking as I spoke, but I didn't feel her retreat and she didn't interrupt me. When I finished, we shared the silence of the darkness, and I was terrified that she would return to me and tell me I was insane, that I was making it all up, that no, she wasn't going to help me.

Instead she said, _Squall... I'm so, so sorry. If I had known!_

I wasn't sure if I wanted to feel relieved or even more terrified. _It's not your fault. I was caught up in time and sent back to the start for a reason. Now I have to protect that reason. I also need to make sure that the timeline stays the same now. Which is why I need your help._

 _Oh, Squall..._

I said nothing else. It was up to her now. She had to be thinking, because she was silent as well. Finally, she said, _I'll help you, Squall. But on one condition._

 _...And what's that?_

 _You have to come back to me this time. You have to come back to me and Rinoa and the others. Especially Seifer. I won't forgive you if you make him go through what Aunt Raine had to go through._

 _...You mean getting him pregnant and leaving him by himself to chase after a little girl?_

 _Jerk._ But Ellone laughed, even though there were tears evident in her voice. _You know what I mean. I have to go now. I'll see you soon._

 _Sis, be careful. I mean it._

The darkness began to recede then, leaving me coming back to the real world. I was still being cradled by Seifer, though everyone else was watching the tunnel nervously. Irvine noticed that I was awake and gave me a nervous smirk. "Back from your adventure, Squall?"

Edea shushed him. "There's something coming."

I got to my feet, silently assuring Seifer that I was fine. I would have to tell him what happened, because I would need him later. Right now, though, I steadied myself to face the car that was pulling up to us and the man getting out of it.

He seemed shocked to see Edea. "Sorceress Edea?"

She nodded. "Yes. We came to see Dr. Odine."

He regarded all of us nervously. "...Please explain what this is regarding."

"Yes, of course." Edea responded.

Before she could begin to explain our situation, I stepped away from Seifer, allowing the man to see me. A flash of recognition followed by swift confusion passed over his face. I hadn't noticed it Before. He saw my father in me, but he couldn't figure out _why_ he could see my father's features in my face, and that bothered him. I kept my voice steady and low, even though I really did want to scream. "I want to see Ellone. Where is she?"

Now the man looked visibly startled. "...Ellone?"

Edea reached to touch my shoulder. "Squall, calm down. Trust me. Let me handle this."

I just looked at Edea for a long time, then nodded and stepped back. The man regarded all of us with a confused and worried expression, then gestured to the car. "Please come with us."

I ignored the small talk as we drove through the city toward the Presidential Palace. I was growing even more nervous. It was silly that I would. If Ellone was on Lunar Base, then so would Laguna be. I wouldn't have to worry about running into my father inadvertently. I smirked at Irvine's comment of the President being a real big shot, and I felt Seifer squeeze my hand. I squeezed it back.

We arrived at the palace and were escorted within to the receiving room that I remembered. I looked toward the couch and watched Seifer place Rinoa there. He stood guard then by her legs, arms crossed over his chest, observing everything. When I heard Odine's voice, I turned to look at the imp of a man, narrowing my eyes at him. He didn't seem to notice. He hadn't noticed Before, either. Odine was too busy with Edea to notice anyone else, at least until the aide spoke to me.

I nodded in response to the aide's question. "I have to bring Rinoa to her. We need to see Ellone."

Odine tensed. "So, you will take Odine hostage!? You are a fool."

I rolled my eyes, earning a snort from Seifer. "No, I'm not taking you hostage. There's no point in it. You can either give me permission to go see her, or I'll make enough noise to draw the attention of people you don't want the attention of. And then _you_ can explain to them why you're denying me such a simple request."

Seifer was openly grinning now, but everyone else was staring at me like I had grown a second head. Odine stared at me suspiciously. Then he turned to the aide. "Do as he says. I give ze permission."

The aide regarded both of us nervously. "...Very well."

Odine wandered toward the couch and Rinoa then, completely ignoring Seifer. His hands hovered over Rinoa's face, not quite touching, but threatening to. "But under one condition. You must let me observe this girl."

The aide looked at me. "...Well? We would need time to prepare before we take you to Ellone. So, you will leave the girl with us until then?"

I nodded.

Seifer moved fast, grabbing Odine's wrist in a grip that obviously hurt. "You better not do anything to Rinoa." he growled. "Or you'll answer to me."

"Seifer." I said quietly.

He glanced at me, then released Odine from his grip with obscene gentleness. Odine stared up at Seifer fearfully, rubbing his wrist. He came to my side and waited for me to start moving before he followed.

The aide followed us out. "We'll take the girl there. There's nothing to worry about. Just head to Lunar Gate."

I nodded again, reaching to grasp Seifer's arm to keep him from doing anything to the aide. There wasn't anything we could do right now anyway, not without causing more problems. I knew Odine wouldn't do anything to Rinoa. He was a creep, but he wasn't capable of doing anything untoward to anyone. He was a scientist, not a pervert. Seifer was cursing under his breath the entire time as we left the palace and then the city, heading toward the Lunar Gate.

The massive structure was just as I remembered. My nerves returned, but I was able to keep them steady this time. We all entered, and after dealing with Angelo, we followed the woman who had greeted us into another room, where we met with the first of the Lunar Gate staff.

"Distance-wise," he said, "it's pretty far, but you'll be there in no time. You'll be there by the time you wake up."

"Wake up?" Seifer questioned. "What do you mean?"

"Let me give you a quick explanation of the whole process." The staff member continued to speak, but I ignored him. I had heard the speech Before, so I knew what to expect. I had survived Before, and I knew I would survive this time around. I focused instead on Edea, noting how nervous she looked. I already knew I was going to be bringing Seifer with me, which meant I needed to give the rest a job to do.

Thankfully, it was easy.

I gave Zell the title of leader in Edea's guard detail, and told the others to back Zell up however they could. Their priority was to protect Edea, but I knew that wasn't going to be the only thing they were going to do. Lunatic Pandora was going to be moving over the city, and while Zell wouldn't be able to do more than get tossed out on his ass, I knew it would keep him occupied until it reached Tears' Point. In the meantime, Seifer and I would be working to ensure Adel woke up, to save Rinoa's life, and move forward toward Time Compression.

I entered the capsule and forced myself to relax. I didn't feel it when the cold sleep came over me, just like Before. I was unconscious before I could form a single thought. When I woke, we had arrived at the Lunar Base, and Seifer, Rinoa, and I were floating in the zero-g space within the Base. Seifer looked like he was going to freak out, but somehow he swallowed his panic and, when the gravity was turned on, he gathered up Rinoa and followed me to the lab tech that appeared at one door. I recognized Piet immediately. I wordlessly handed him the letter of introduction from Esthar's ambassador. He read the letter, then looked at Rinoa.

"Wow..." he breathed. "What is she, seventeen, eighteen... Is she dead?"

Seifer growled softly. I held up a hand to stop him from punching the tech in the face. "Don't touch her." I said.

Piet nodded. "I understand the situation. Let's get her to the med lab and we'll talk there. Please follow me."

I nodded and moved in front of Seifer, allowing him to follow me and Piet to the lab. When I gestured, Seifer set Rinoa on the table there, and then he looked at us expectantly. Piet nodded. "I've talked to my crew." he said. "Everything will be alright. Come, let's go to the control room."

I knew what to expect when we arrived there. Seifer let out a low whistle, though, his eyes wide at the sight of the moon being so close to us. "Holy Hyne," Seifer breathed, "this is incredible."

"This is no time to be impressed." said one of the controllers. "Look at the monitor there."

I stared at the red glow on the monitor and felt my stomach grow tight. The monsters were gathering, just as they had Before. They were getting ready for the Lunar Cry. I closed my eyes and tried to breathe evenly. I knew what was going on below on Earth. Zell and the others were trying to stop (and failing to do so) the Lunatic Pandora from reaching Tears' Point. It was a brave, futile effort. I opened my eyes and looked at Seifer. His expression had gone stony as he stared at the monsters. His jaw twitched and he regarded me with a raised eyebrow. I nodded slowly, then canted my head.

"Yeah, sure."

He followed me out of the control room then, and together we headed up to the second floor. Ellone was waiting for us, hands clasped in her lap, her gaze locked on the view outside her room. She jumped a little when she heard our approach, then looked at Seifer and me with tear-filled eyes. She caught me in a tight hug, pulling me as close to her as possible. She did the same to Seifer, though it was harder for her to pull him down to her. He easily outweighed her, and he had more mass. He awkwardly returned her hug, then stepped back, leaving me in the forefront.

"Squall," Ellone breathed, wiping her eyes, "I'm so happy to see you again."

"Me too."

"I'm so sorry. I got you involved in so many things... so much hardship."

I shrugged. "It's done. We both learned what we needed to. Sis, about what we talked of..."

Ellone nodded. "I tried to tell Uncle Laguna, but he blew me off, as usual. Honestly, I don't know where his confidence comes from. He went out there to check on Adel, just like you said he would. When the moon started glowing like that... it's really happening, isn't it?"

I nodded. I suddenly felt Seifer at my back, and I knew he was staring down at me. "You told her?"

I nodded.

"Why did you do that? I thought you didn't want anyone else to know!"

"Don't get mad at him!" Ellone snapped, coming to my defense against Seifer. He looked at her and narrowed his eyes. "I made him tell me. Seifer, you know what I do. Squall is an anomaly in this time. He isn't supposed to exist like he is. No one should know what we do, what he does. Do you know how dangerous that knowledge can be?"

Seifer bared his teeth at her. "If it were anyone but Squall, I'd agree with you. But Squall's always been the more responsible one out of all of us. He's always the one who's doing the right thing, his own wants and needs be damned! I've watched him suffer with his knowledge, sacrifice things he knew he could save if he'd just changed one more thing, and know how much people have hated him for making the decisions he has, even though they understand why. I've stood by him this far, and I'm not giving up now."

"I'm not telling you to give up on him!" Ellone shouted, pointing at Seifer's chest.

I held up my hand to stop their argument. "I told the both of you because you're the only ones who can understand, and you're the only ones who won't try and change my mind. Sis, I promise. I promise that I won't let that happen."

Her eyes softened as she tore them away from Seifer and set them on me. She nodded, reaching out to hug me again. I felt her sigh against me. "All right." she said. "I'll help. I'll do this for you. So take me to Rinoa and-"

The alarm blared suddenly and I felt cold rush through my system.

"The hell is that?" Seifer asked, staring around as if he could figure out the reason for the alarm.

I pressed my lips into a thin line. "It's started."


	28. Chapter 28

Twenty-Eight - Seifer POV

I stared at Squall in confusion, as did Ellone. Squall visibly shivered, then started to leave Ellone's room at the same time the loudspeaker began to blare, "Red Alert! Red Alert! All units report to med lab. Stat!"

"Shit." I hurried after Squall with Ellone right behind me. Something was wrong with Rinoa. We'd left her in the med lab, still asleep. The alert was calling for aid to go to the med lab. It wasn't hard to put two and two together.

Squall drew up short and looked at Ellone. "Go wait in the control room."

"But."

"Just do it. And hide."

Ellone nodded, taking a step away from us and hesitating. "Okay. Be careful, alright?"

"We'll be fine."

I wished I had Squall's confidence. Once Ellone had gone, Squall led me back to the med lab. I was shocked into stillness when I saw her coming toward us, her steps awkward and jerky. I started toward her, but Squall grabbed my wrist.

"She's not awake." he said, his voice low. "Ultimecia is controlling her."

"What do we do?!"

"There's nothing we can do." Squall replied. "We have to let her out."

I sucked in a deep breath and used the air to curse colorfully. "So you're saying we're just to stand back and let her wake Adel up?"

Squall looked at me. He didn't nod, didn't give me any form of affirmative, just looked at me. I cursed again. "Shit. I don't like this. I don't like this at all."

Rinoa glided past us into the control room. We followed, but there was nothing we could do to stop her. An aide tried to get her away from the console, only to be blasted back by some unseen force. She stood over a control panel, wobbling this way and that, as if she couldn't figure out what it was she was looking for.

"That is Adel's Tomb's seal deactivation device." Piet said, his voice shaky.

The loudspeaker blared, "Adel's Tomb Level One Seal Deactivated. Level One Seal has been deactivated."

Her task done, Rinoa turned around and glided out, her face blank and eyes unseeing. She didn't recognize any of us, just glided past us without fear of being stopped. Piet gave a wordless cry, drawing our gazes back to him. "Fuck." I spat, staring as the monsters on the moon began to move as one huge creature. "It's overflowing with them!"

Piet whimpered. "It's finally starting..."

"The Lunar Cry..."

I stared at Squall, getting a shiver down my spine from the way his words were whispered.

"If that's the case," Piet said suddenly, "we definitely have to stop her. If she plans to free Adel, she'll have to go out there. The Level Two seal is located on Adel's Tomb."

Squall and I left the control room then, me slightly before him. As we passed some of the crew, one cried out, pointing toward the moon. I stopped and stared, watching as the monsters swelled into one big globule of beastie and exploded, streaming down from the moon toward the planet. I looked at Squall's face, taking into consideration his utter stillness. Yes, he'd expected this to happen, but not so soon. He had expected to have a few more moments before this whole thing started.

Squall caught one of the crew members by the shoulder. "Have you seen a girl come by here?"

The man nodded. "Yes. She went into that locker room."

I was a step ahead of Squall then, reaching the locker room first. I looked around, trying to find her, but I couldn't see her anywhere.

 _There!_ Carbuncle said, directing my attention toward the far side of the room. Rinoa stood behind a sealed division, already geared up for going out into space. I was frozen for a second, but Squall wasn't. He grabbed a spacesuit of his own and was already bundled up and heading after Rinoa. I looked for a suit for myself, but I couldn't find one. I was left waiting for Squall to bring Rinoa back. He returned empty-handed.

"She's outside already." Squall said, a slight growl in his voice.

"I take it you wanted to make sure she didn't get that far."

"At least not by herself."

"Why?"

He didn't answer me. Instead he ran back to the hallway, me at his heels. We passed a trio of struggling men, two arguing with the one as they hauled him toward an evacuation capsule. I barely caught the man's words, but I was pretty sure 'Ellone' was one of them. We entered the control room where Piet and Ellone were watching, waiting. Piet was close to a console, his hands curled into fists as he stared out the window.

"Dammit," he cursed, "the seal's gonna be broken!"

I watched with a lump of fear in my throat as Rinoa floated closer to the tomb. The tomb shifted, disengaging from whatever was keeping it in place and it was caught up in the stream of monsters heading to the planet. It disappeared from sight. So did Rinoa.

"Come on." Piet said, pushing himself away from the console. "We have to evacuate! Now!"

"What about Rinoa?" I snapped. "We can't just leave her!"

Piet ignored me. Much to my dismay, so did Squall. Ellone reached to grab my arm to keep me from grabbing Squall and shoving him against the wall. I looked down at her, saw her lips drawn in a thin line, her eyes filled with fear. I looked at Squall.

"We have to get out, now." Squall said, his voice quiet. "I won't let Rinoa die."

He wasn't giving me a choice now. Neither was Ellone. Between the two of them, we were hustled into the escape pod after Piet. Piet strapped himself down in one seat. Ellone took another. I grabbed a third seat and held on tightly as the escape pod rocked from a vibration. It was only after I strapped myself in that I realized Squall wasn't there. I tried to get the mechanism pinning me into the chair to unlock, but it refused. Then Squall entered the escape pod, and pushed the launch button, shooting us out safely. I glared at him, hating the way he had scared me to death life that. He picked himself up and gripped onto a hook in the side of the pod, steadying himself.

"Seifer."

I looked at him, narrowing my eyes. "What the hell, Squall? Are you _trying_ to give me a heart attack?"

His lips quirked. "Take care of Ellone."

"What?"

"Take care of Ellone. Don't let her get hurt."

"Squall, what are you talking about?"

He didn't say anything. He just looked at Ellone. "Sis, take me back to the nearest past for Rinoa. I need to reach her."

Ellone stared at him with watery eyes. "I remember those eyes. You just looked at me with the same eyes you had when you were little. Those curious, innocent, puppy dog eyes. I loved those eyes."

Squall smiled, looking beautiful as he did so. "Sis. I have to help Rinoa now."

"Yes. I know." Ellone took a deep breath. "Are you ready? To the nearest past... To the closest present to the future..."

Both of them stilled. Ellone's eyes were closed and Squall was staring off somewhere past my shoulder. Whatever they were doing, I knew it had to deal with Ellone's powers. When they came back to themselves, Ellone sucked in a deep breath, and she slumped in her chair. Squall straightened and held tighter to the handle he'd been using to steady himself before.

"Thanks, Sis." Squall said quietly.

"Squall, be careful."

He smiled at her, then regarded me. "Wait for us. We'll be back soon."

I felt a flash of cold. "Squall, what the hell are you talking about?"

He didn't answer me. He yanked on the handle and was suddenly drawn up to the ceiling of the pod. An opening appeared in the ceiling and he went through, vanishing from sight as the door closed.

"Squall? Squall!"

"Idiot!" Piet snapped. "There's no way he can get back! He's insane! He's gonna run out of fuel and life-support in no time. They're both gonna die."

"They won't die." Ellone said with confidence. "My little brother won't die. He won't let Rinoa die. You'll see."

I closed my eyes tight. He had told me that he had rescued Rinoa from space and that they had made it safely back to the earth together, but he hadn't told me that he'd gone out there like a freaking maverick, risking himself for her. Rinoa wouldn't have wanted him to sacrifice himself for her. Idiot. Idiot! He hadn't told me because he hadn't wanted me to stop him. He hadn't wanted me to risk myself for something he knew how to do already. He had rescued Rinoa Before, and he could do it again. I listened to Piet grumble about Squall's stupidity and felt anger flare in me.

I opened my eyes and looked at Piet. "Say one more word about Squall's intelligence, and I'll introduce my fist to your teeth."

He stared at me with wide eyes.

Ellone let out a shaky breath. "He'll be okay. They'll both be okay."

"Yeah." I said. "They'll be okay. We just have to wait for them. Hey, Ellone."

She looked up at me, trying not to cry and trying to look brave, even though her eyes watered and her lower lip trembled.

"I'll protect you, okay? I promised Squall. Don't worry about anything, alright? He'll come back to us, and we'll get through this. You know he's gonna survive this. You know it."

She nodded, giving a shaky breath. I gripped my seat tightly and held on, hoping that this time around, Squall wasn't going to end up floating dead in space. Everything had gone exactly as he'd wanted so far, but there was always room for error. Things always had the potential to go wrong. I decided I would beat the crap out of him when he came back to me. He had lied to me by omission, and that pissed me off. That thought cheered me a little bit, so I held on, and waited for the landing that would come.


	29. Chapter 29

Twenty-Nine - Squall POV

I floated out into the cold of space, knowing that I had a very limited time to catch Rinoa. I grabbed onto her as she floated toward me, pulling her close. She grabbed onto me, and I felt her hands tighten around my arms and hand. She turned to face me, her eyes wet with tears, a smile on her face.

"Squall..." she breathed, "thank you. I heard your voice."

"Good." I replied. I smiled back at her. "I'm glad you're back to your old self, as well."

Her laugh was more of a whimper. "Are we gonna make it?"

"Don't worry. Of course we are." Since I was looking for it, it was easy to spot it. I pushed us toward the Ragnarok, guiding us within the giant red ship. As soon as we were in, I closed the hatch, letting the airlock pressurize.

As soon as gravity kicked in for us, I pulled off my suit and helped Rinoa with hers. When she was free of the suit, she turned to look at me, a huge smile blooming on her face. I frowned slightly, trying to figure out what her expression could mean. She hadn't smiled that way to me Before. I took a slight step back, causing her to laugh.

"Do you think I'm gonna jump your bones? You belong to Seifer!" She laughed harder. "I'm just... I'm just happy! You saved me. You rescued me again."

I sighed, shaking my head. "Of course I did. You're my friend."

She brightened, stepped toward me, and opened her arms wide. "The space suit was in our way before."

I sighed. I reached out, pulling her tight against me in as strong a hug as I could manage. I pressed my cheek against her hair. Her arms wrapped tight around me, her face buried in my chest, and I felt her start to tremble. Before, I hadn't indulged her like this. Doing it now, I could feel her break and start to cry. She clung to me, letting out all the fear that had been pent up inside her during her time possessed, her fear that she was going to die out in space, all alone. Everything that she had been through so far, she cried out into my shirt. When she finished, she pulled back and sniffled, poking at the wet spots on my shirt apologetically.

"It's just cotton." I said.

She looked at me, an eyebrow quirking above a puffy doe-brown eye. "Did you just make a joke?"

I shrugged.

"It was pretty bad. But then, you are Squall Leonhart."

"So I'm not allowed to make jokes, be sarcastic, or anything that is considered un-Squall-like?"

"Yes. Because if you stop acting like Squall, people are going to wonder what you did to the real one."

I smiled slightly, shaking my head. "Whatever."

She grinned back, finally feeling better it seemed. "Thank you, Squall. Really."

"I'm your knight. And your friend. I'm supposed to protect you, just like you're supposed to protect me."

She looked at me curiously. "My knight?"

I nodded. "You're a sorceress now."

Her face fell. "Oh. Right."

"It's nothing to be ashamed of." I said. "Being a sorceress isn't a bad thing. Yes, sorceresses have done bad things lately, but that's not you. That's not who you are. You're the only one who can decide what you do. You're the only one who can look at what you have and say 'This is what I'm going to do with my power'. No one else gets to dictate what you do. No one else can control you. I will protect you. So will Seifer and everyone else."

She shivered. "You will?"

"Of course."

"And Seifer? And the others?"

"Seifer's already told me, with great vigor, that he's going to be your knight too. A sorceress with two knights is a force to be reckoned with."

"And no one with a brain would go up against you two."

I shrugged at that. I was sure there were still a few people who would be stupid enough to pit themselves against Seifer and I. Rinoa rubbed her eyes and smiled, letting out a shaky breath. "Okay." she said. "I can be a good sorceress. I've got two scary knights to protect me, and everyone else too."

I smiled. "We're your friends, Rinoa. You'll see as soon as we get back." I offered my hand then. She took it, and I led her from the airlock into the ship proper.

After we defeated the monsters lurking about the Ragnarok, we headed into the cockpit. Rinoa gasped in awe at what she found, moving toward the panels and running her fingers gently over buttons. I headed toward the pilot's seat, easing down into it and focusing on the console before me. I began inputting the sequence to wake the Ragnarok up, pausing when Rinoa frowned at a control panel.

She looked at me then, pointing at the panel. "Squall, it's trying to talk."

I sighed quietly and reached to turn up the volume.

"This is Esthar Airstation."

I stared in silence.

"Ragnarok, do you read? Ragnarok, do you read?!"

Rinoa looked at me, her lips a thin line and her eyes filled with worry. I continued to hold my silence.

"This is Airstation. Do you copy?"

No sense in delaying the inevitable. I reached to press the button that would turn on the microphone and said, "This is the Ragnarok."

"Whoa! Is this _really_ the Ragnarok? You're in space, right?"

"No, we're actually sitting on Cactuar Island, taking in the sights." I responded, keeping my voice as even and bland as possible. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Rinoa's nervous expression change and her lips started to split into a wide grin. Who says I couldn't display a sense of humor now?

There was utter silence from the Airstation. I wanted to laugh, but that would set Rinoa off, and she was already having a hard time stopping herself from bursting out into raucous noise.

"Ragnarok..." The Airstation operator sounded like he wanted to snap at us, but was somehow holding himself back. "It's been seventeen years! Save the attitude for when you get back."

"Whatever."

"You should have enough fuel. Enter your location into the atmospheric reentry program and you'll be okay. Once you enter the atmosphere, we can guide you down. You'll be just fine."

I had already started to input the commands before the Airstation control operator even began he began to give me the information. His voice only ensured that my memory hadn't faded in the least bit, but I still double-checked my codes and matched them to what he said.

"No errors?"

"It's fine." I replied.

"Next, I'm sure you're okay, but there's something I need you to do. Turn off the gravity generator. This should save some fuel. Use the same touch panel to turn it off."

"Done."

"Congratulations. You're home free, Ragnarok. And... There's one more thing we need to tell you. From all of us at Ground Control, we wish you godspeed."

"Thanks." I flipped the radio off and sat back in my chair. Rinoa clasped her hands in her lap, her mirthful smile now lessened into a weary, frightened one. I turned to look at her, my head tilting to the side. "Don't worry. I'll protect you."

Rinoa looked at me and smiled. "I know. It's just... I'm nervous."

"No need to be. Put on your seatbelt."

Rinoa did as I asked her, pulling her restraint on. She still seemed a little nervous, but there was nothing I could do now to change that. At least she wasn't jumping into my lap like she had before. She inhaled softly. "We're gonna make it home, right?"

"Of course."

"When we get back... You really meant it? That you wouldn't let them take me away? Even though I'm a sorceress?"

"I really meant it." I looked at her as I pulled my own restraints on. "Look, Rinoa, no one can predict the future. There are no guarantees. But I will do whatever I need to do to keep you safe. So will everyone else. So will Seifer."

"Won't they be angry with me?"

"Some might. But none of what happened was your fault." _If anything, it was mine, for continuing to keep the timeline going forward._ I looked away and closed my eyes, sighing deeply. "You were possessed. There was nothing you could do about it. But as you are now, yeah, there's something you can do. You can help defeat Adel and Ultimecia, and prove them all wrong."

Rinoa started to smile again. Her hands relaxed. "Yeah. Yeah, I can do that."

Before I could say anything more, the radio crackled. "This is Airstation. Ragnarok, please respond."

I sighed silently so as not to alarm Rinoa. "This is the Ragnarok."

"We have some questions for you. We're collecting escape pods. We have a good idea of what happened. I hear no one from Lunar Base is on the Ragnarok. How many of you are there?"

"Just two."

"...Your names?"

"Squall Leonhart. I'm a SeeD from Balamb Garden."

"And the other?"

"Rinoa Heartilly."

"Rinoa? The sorceress!? She's on the ship!?"

Rinoa went pale and her hands clenched again. I reached over as far as I could and grasped her hand. She clutched mine with a grip that hurt. I lifted my other hand to my lips and told her to be quiet, silently. Rinoa nodded, her lips a thin line. Her eyes regarded me with complete trust.

"Respond, Ragnarok!"

I squeezed her hand back, silently telling her to remember everything that I had told her, and not to waver even the least bit. I was her knight. I was going to protect her no matter what. I knew what we would encounter when we landed, and I knew I would have a harder time fighting Rinoa than the people who came to take her away. Rinoa seemed to know that as well, but she shook her head, and gave me a determined stare with those bright golden eyes of hers.

"Respond, Ragnarok!"

"When we get down there," I said softly, "don't let go of my hand. Don't stand in front of me. Don't say anything. Let me do the talking. You wouldn't want Seifer to beat the shit out of me for letting you get captured, would you?"

"Of course not!" Rinoa said, suddenly full of fire. Her other hand curled into a fist. "I still owe him one for not listening to me earlier!"

"The sorceress will be seized upon arrival." said the Airstation. "Be sure to follow the crew's instructions."

I leaned forward then, as close as I could get to the console, and growled, "You lay one hand on Rinoa, and I will bring everything I am down on you. If you even _think_ of taking her from me, I will kill you. She may be a sorceress, but she's _my_ sorceress, I'm her knight, and she's my friend. I won't let you punish her for something she had no choice in. Do you understand me?"

There was utter silence. I wasn't surprised. Esthar wasn't used to be spoken to the way that I had just spoken. They definitely had been taken aback by my words. Before, I had been too confused, too hurt, too overwhelmed by my own feelings to really know how to respond until it was too late. Rinoa had been afraid and looking for my strength to lean on, and when I hadn't responded to her, she had taken matters into her own hands. She had done the only thing she thought was right. This time around, I wasn't giving her the choice. She was going to stay with me, and I wasn't going to let her fear dictate her actions. She wasn't going to try to martyr herself in order to prevent Ultimecia from winning.

 _Bahamut._

The king of dragons laughed, deep and sonorous, from inside my mind. _I was wondering when you were going to get around to being flashy._

I smiled, feeling Rinoa squeeze my hand a little tighter. She didn't know what I was going to do, what lengths I would go to to ensure her well-being and safety. I had basically declared war with the ground personnel, and they were going to come armed and ready for a fight. Just as well. I was ready for it.

The Ragnarok landed smoothly and I was out of my seatbelt first. Rinoa was a little more sedate in taking off her restraints and joining me. I held out my hand. She slipped hers in mine and clutched tight to me. "Remember," I started, "stay behind me, and don't let go."

"I won't forget." Rinoa whispered. "And back at you. Don't let go."

We descended from the Ragnarok together. Two Sorceress Memorial personnel were there waiting, along with several Estharian soldiers. No one from our group was there, not even Seifer. I wasn't surprised; if they had been allowed to come along (and I'm sure Seifer tried) then the Estharian soldiers would be severely outnumbered. But I wasn't without my tricks either.

One of the men dressed in white stepped forward. "Sorceress Rinoa. Hyne's descendant."

The second one stepped forward. "Come with us. We must seal your power for the sake of the world."

The Estharian soldiers readied their weapons, set to fight if I refused to let Rinoa go, and if Rinoa refused to let go of me. They would shoot. That was how afraid of her they were. How afraid of me and my threat. Rinoa didn't step out from behind me. She didn't let go of my hand. I knew she was scared, terrified. She would sacrifice herself for me if they decided to threaten me. I felt her move and glanced over my shoulder at her, to find her gripping my ring that was still on its chain around her throat. I smiled at her.

Bahamut slammed down on all fours, surrounding Rinoa and I with his bulk. He focused on the Estharian soldiers and the Sorceress Memorial personnel and roared. I saw their eyes go wide. Watched them scream and retreat, and the soldiers bring their weapons to bear upon Bahamut. He bowled them over as if they were defenseless kittens with a massive paw. It was a gentle bat, but it still sent the soldiers sprawling. The personnel in white fell to the ground, staring up at Bahamut as the great dragon turned to angle his head to see them better.

"Now that I have your attention," I said, keeping my voice even. I reached up and offered my hand to Bahamut, who nuzzled it as gently as a loyal dog might. I knew he was doing it on purpose, because it gave him some sick satisfaction to show people that I, and only I, had sole control over his actions. "You will lower your weapons, and you will retreat back to the Sorceress Memorial. You will not come for Rinoa again. If you do, I'll let my dragon have you. Rinoa and I are going to get back onto the Ragnarok. If you try to the bar the way of anyone who comes, I'll know. If you try to stop us in any way, I'll know."

Bahamut rumbled and stepped past Rinoa and me, his powerful claws tearing deep furrows in the dry earth below. His tail lashed, his wings spread, and he looked huge and menacing. _If they try to advance, can I eat them?_

 _Do whatever you want._ I told him. _Just let Seifer through._

 _And the others?_

 _When they get here._

Bahamut let out another growl and crouched down. I pushed Rinoa back up the ramp and toward the interior of the ship. She went, and I followed close behind, making sure she didn't change her mind. When we were safely in the meeting room I had discovered Before, I took a seat in one of the chairs and became almost boneless. Rinoa took a seat in the chair opposite me and sat there, trembling.

"Rinoa?"

She looked up at me and grinned. "I didn't know you had a _dragon_. He is so cool!"

I let my head fall back against the chair and laughed, echoing Bahamut's roar as it reverberated through the Ragnarok from outside.


	30. Chapter 30

Thirty - Squall POV

Seifer didn't keep us waiting long. I was sure he had started moving the moment we had touched down, not letting anyone or anything get in his way. Bahamut probably gave him pause when he stepped up to the Ragnarok, but the dragon king didn't bar his way. He let me know Seifer was on his way up, and I in turn told Rinoa. She beamed at me, and as soon as Seifer pushed his way through the door into the room, she was out of her seat and giving him the biggest, hardest hug she had probably given anyone, including me. And Seifer wrapped his arms tightly around her and lifted her up off the floor, probably driving the breath out of her. Then he put her down and strode over to me.

I didn't get up.

He and I stared at each other, him looking down and I looking up, and then he leaned down, bracing his hands on the armrests of the chair. "You son of a bitch." he growled.

I smiled.

"Yeah, yeah. Happy to see me too." Then he kissed me, hard. Our lips met with bruising force, and his hand tangled in my hair, keeping me from going anywhere. His tongue forced its way into my mouth and fought with mine for a while. Then he stepped back from me. "What the _fuck_ were you thinking?!"

I pointed at Rinoa. "I was thinking I was saving her."

She came to my defense quickly. "Don't get mad at him! He _was_ saving my life! And he was keeping those Estharian guys from taking me away to this Sorceress Memorial and sealing me away!"

Seifer's green eyes narrowed and brightened, but he didn't turn away from me to face her. He kept focused on me. "And that demon out front?"

"He's playing guard dog. Did he eat anyone?"

Seifer snorted. "Not yet. When I got here, the Estharians had all but retreated. They thought I was crazy for going _toward_ the giant beast the Knight of the Sorceress summoned, but I bet they shit their pants when Bahamut let me walk right on by."

I smiled again.

Seifer rubbed the back of his neck and looked at Rinoa. "How are you feeling, princess?"

Rinoa grinned. "Better. Much better. I've got both my knights now. Though I think Squall's overextending himself. Since we got in here, all he did was sit there in that chair with his eyes closed. He won't admit to taking a nap, but I'm pretty sure he did."

Seifer looked at me. I lifted my shoulders and scoffed silently. Seifer folded his arms over his chest. "Well, I'm here now. I can do some of the heavier lifting."

I tilted my head back and looked up at him. "Did you wait for the rescue crew, or did you come straight here?"

He sighed. "The impact from the landing knocked me out. When I woke up, Ellone was gone. Figured it happened just like... just after we landed. I convinced the rescue crew to bring me here, though they didn't get within one hundred feet of Bahamut."

His voice wavered as he almost slipped. I heard it, but Rinoa, thankfully, didn't. She frowned, not sure what was going on, but definitely not liking it. "What happened to her?"

"She was probably captured." Seifer said. "We were defenseless, so it wasn't hard for someone to do it."

"That's terrible! We have to rescue her!"

Before I could say anything else, I heard Bahamut say, _They're here._ I held up my hand for silence, and Seifer and Rinoa quickly closed their mouths. Scant few seconds later, Zell and the others ran into the room. They all grinned upon seeing us safe, whole, and healthy.

"S'up Squall!" Zell crowed, grinning broadly. "So glad you're safe! I hate to tell you this now, but we've got major problems down here. Well, here it goes! Some big thing called Lunatic Pandora came out of nowhere. Matron couldn't achieve what she set out to do because of it. Which is okay. Matron's not a sorceress anymore. Matron gave her power to someone without realizing it. And, ah... Oh, yeah, the Galbadian military is controlling Lunatic Pandora. They excavated it from the ocean where Esthar sank it years ago. Inside the Lunatic Pandora, there's this thing called a 'Crystal Pillar'. It calls monsters from the moon. The monsters came falling from the moon. Total panic down here. It wasn't just monsters that came falling down. Sorceress Adel came down-"

I held up my hand to stop him. His teeth clicked shut, and he looked sullen. I knew he had more to say, but I didn't need to hear it. I already knew. "Adel is inside Lunatic Pandora, and that may have been Galbadia's true intention."

Zell gaped for a second, then nodded. "Yeah. That's what Dr. Odine thought, too."

"What I want to know," Selphie piped up, "is who received Matron's powers."

Rinoa raised her hand then, looking demure and nervous. "I did. It was me. I'm a sorceress now. Esthar wanted to take me to this place called Sorceress Memorial, and seal me up. They were afraid of me."

"Makes sense." Quistis said. Everyone looked at her sharply and she tensed under their stares. "Well, it does. All Esthar has ever known is bad sorceresses. And now the rest of the world has too. I know Matron was possessed by Ultimecia, but the world only saw her do evil things."

"And everyone saw me release Adel." Rinoa said quietly. "I was possessed by Ultimecia when I did it, but I still did it. It was still... still me."

"No it wasn't!" Selphie said, moving to Rinoa and gripping her hands tightly. "It wasn't your fault, Rinoa!"

Rinoa smiled, but her eyes watered. "Squall told me the same thing."

"Well, he was right!"

Rinoa looked at me, her gaze drifting back and forth between Seifer and I. Then she looked at Selphie again and smiled. "I want to set things right. I released Adel, whether I was in control of my body or not. We have to stop her from reviving."

I stood up from my seat then, causing everyone to look at me expectantly. I couldn't rush things now, so I knew I had to wait for them to make the first move. So I looked at everyone and said, "If you want to back out now, I won't say a word. I won't hold it against you. Because from here on out, everything we do is for keeps. Some of us might not come back. We may be SeeD, but that doesn't mean we have to throw our lives away, especially in a fight that isn't technically ours. We weren't hired for this." I let my words sink in for a minute before I continued. "Esthar demanded I hand Rinoa over to them. I refused. I threatened them. They're going to come after me to get to her. If you choose to stay, you'll be drawing the line and daring them to cross it."

"I think I speak for all of us when I say, we're with you, Squall. I mean," Selphie flashed me a bright grin, "Commander Leonheart."

I looked around the room at the others. Quistis nodded demurely, her face set in a determined mask. Zell grinned and flashed me a thumbs up. Irvine tipped his hat to me. I already knew where Seifer stood and Rinoa had announced her intentions to everyone. I allowed myself to smile and nodded. "Here's my plan. We can't launch a full-scale assault, whether it's preemptive or retaliatory, against Esthar, not without risking Rinoa. So we're going to concede the field for now and go back to Matron's."

"What?" Zell gasped. "Why?"

"Because, chicken-wuss, he's forcing Esthar to call his bluff." Seifer said, a lazy grin on his face. Zell only glowered at him. "We've got the sorceress they're so scared of. Squall's publicly declared himself her knight. There's a giant dragon waiting to eat people outside, so they'd have to be stupid to try and attack now. But if he retreats, it looks like he's daring them to chase him, and taking Rinoa with him only will make them more desperate. They'd be idiots to attack us, especially on our home turf. We'd have the advantage of terrain knowledge, even if they came at us, guns blazing."

I saw understanding fill Zell's blue eyes then. He looked at me with a healthy dose of awe in his gaze. "I get it! You're going to force Esthar to admit they _need_ us in order to defeat Ultimecia, who's the real threat!"

"More or less." I replied. I had shown Esthar, or more accurately, Kiros, Ward, and Laguna my strength and determination. They could easily access my records and discover my military prowess. I wasn't really sure how, or why, they had arrived at the decision of hiring SeeD in the Before, but I had hypotheses, and none of them really made me happy. "For now," I said after a while, "we are going to retreat. Selphie?"

She looked at me a little too eagerly. "Yeah?"

"Would you like to pilot the Ragnarok?"

"WHOO-HOO!" Selphie bolted out of the room a little too quickly, which told me how excited she was to play with the new toy.

I looked at Irvine. "Control her as best you can? And make sure she takes us to Matron's."

He grinned. "You got it." He sauntered out of the room after Selphie. Zell and Quistis followed soon after, out of fear that Selphie might actually kill us all this time.

"Um," Rinoa started, smiling back and forth between Seifer and I, "I think I'm gonna go sit down somewhere quiet for a while. It's been a long day, and I'd rather be sitting when Selphie gets the Ragnarok going."

I didn't say anything, but Seifer, being the gentleman he was, escorted Rinoa to the door and ushered her out of it. Then he ensured the door was locked after it closed, leaving us trapped in the room together. I didn't move from my place by the table. Seifer didn't move from his place by the door. We stared at each other, each unwilling to be the first to break the silence growing between us. I leaned back against the table and folded my arms across my chest, giving Seifer my best SeeD Commander stare. It didn't have the intended effect of intimidation, which pissed me off a little bit, but the small smile that quirked his lips made me feel relaxed in a way I couldn't describe.

 _Squall,_ Bahamut hissed, _do I really have to stand out here until you take off in that tin can?_

 _No, you can come back now. Thank you._

With a grumble, Bahamut settled back in my mind, where he continued to grumble with half-hearted vinegar until he was comfortable again. Not too long after that, I felt the Ragnarok shift as Selphie figured out the controls of the ship and the gravitational engine kicked on as it lifted off. I barely felt anything even though I knew the ship was moving. Seifer quickly schooled his expression into one of nonchalance, but I knew he was a little freaked out by the ship. I had been too, when I first felt it fly under Selphie's command. Now it was just a little uncomfortable. I was used to the Garden; the Ragnarok was far faster and far more sensitive.

"I can't believe you let her pilot this," Seifer grumbled.

I shrugged. "Before, I didn't give her permission. She just did it. Then we stormed the Sorceress Memorial and rescued Rinoa."

"Selphie pushed you in that direction, eh?"

I shrugged again. I didn't particularly want to remember Before. I'd been an emotional wreck, feeling as if my life was spiraling out of control and doing whatever someone else decided, even if it made me feel like crap. I hadn't been me. Now I was looking at my past with a different sort of clarity, bought with experience and a chance to write a different history. I had been a completely different person at that stage in the fight, lost and confused and terrified that I was going to lose everyone and everything I cared about, and the only thing I could do was feel sorry for myself.

"Talk to me."

I looked up at Seifer. He'd closed the distance between us and now stood only a few inches away. That I hadn't heard him move or felt his presence so close told me that I had fallen deeply inward, and my expression must have worried him. His face didn't show it, of course, but I could see the tenseness to his shoulders. If I was worried now, Seifer was probably scared, and he didn't handle fear well. I'd prepared him for the future steps we were going to take, but describing wasn't the same as doing. It held a different flavor, a different anticipation. A different kind of fear. Until you've experienced what you've been anticipating, you didn't really know how to feel, and when you're in a situation that requires fight or flight, feelings and emotions and everything but instinct was shut away until 'safe' was a believable thing.

"It's nothing, really." I said at last, my voice soft.

He arched a brow at me. "Really?"

"Just remembering."

"Ah."

He opened his arms but didn't move forward. He just looked at me. After a moment, I pushed away from the table and pressed my face into his shoulder. I didn't wrap my arms around him, but he enclosed me in his. I felt his cheek press against my hair. I didn't know what he was looking at, or if he was standing with his eyes closed and just holding me. He didn't let go, though, and I didn't move back.

Then Seifer said, "You're a bastard, you know that? For not telling me what you were going to do up there. And for not telling me Sis would get taken by Galbadia."

I fidgeted. It was a small twitch, but he felt it anyway.

"What now?"

I stayed quiet.

"Oh, no, no." Seifer pushed me back then and pressed me against the table, one of his legs between mine and his weight bearing down me so I was bent awkwardly backwards with my own weight focused on my elbows. "You talk, Leonhart. No more surprises. You stopped right after you told Ellone you needed her to meld with Rinoa to achieve the Time Compression. There were details you didn't tell us. You tell me now, or I swear to Hyne, you're not getting out of this room until you do."

I focused on his face, on the way his green eyes glinted with anger. I licked my lips, just a little flick of the tongue, and noticed that he noticed the movement. He realized it wasn't a nervous tick but a diversionary tactic far too quickly for my liking, and he shifted just enough to ensure I wouldn't get enough leverage to shove him off me. Of course, that meant he was pressed tightly enough against me that I could feel him, and he could feel me. And that wasn't good for either of us. He pressed against me even harder, and I slowly lost my ability to think as I started to drown in his scent, in his heat.

The only way for me to escape was to get him away from me. So I said, "Rinoa has to inherit Adel's power. For her to do that Before, you threw her to Adel so Adel could absorb Rinoa's power."

He jerked back, releasing me and taking a few steps away. He ran a hand through his hair and said one word that summed up the situation rather nicely, I thought. "Fuck."

I lowered myself off the table to stand on the floor. I focused on the carpet that covered the Ragnarok's floor, certain that I hadn't seen that particular pattern in the fibers before. "That has to be done so that Ultimecia will thrust her consciousness into Rinoa. Then, and only then, can Sis use her powers to send them both far enough into the past for Ultimecia to start the Time Compression. She'll pull Rinoa back, freeing her of Ultimecia," I explained, feeling as though I had to speak quickly, "but then we're going to get into it for real."

"Before you didn't have a choice about it, but now you do." Seifer said. "Are you really going to let Rinoa that close to Adel?"

I nodded.

"And you expect me to let that happen, too?"

I nodded.

He ran his hand through his hair and then over his face. "Fuck, Squall, you don't make this easy."

"That's three times you've said that now."

He gave me an amused, if frustrated, smirk. "And I'm sure I'll say it again, sooner or later."

I shrugged. "The point is, Seifer, no matter how much I want to change things I can't. Besides, something's occurred to me lately that I didn't think of before."

"And what's that?"

"Ultimecia is a sorceress who has the power over time. She knew a SeeD was going to come to kill her, which turned out to be me. She was running from her death in the only way she knew how - stopping it entirely. She might already know I'm coming. She might have prepared something for me. I'm as unnatural to this timeline as she is. We could destroy each other."

Seifer was silent for a time, just staring at me. His green eyes were dark, and I could almost see the thoughts working in his mind. Then he stepped closer to me, trapping me against the table and against his body. He lifted his hand and placed it on the back of my head. His fingers closed on my hair and pulled my head back slightly. Then I felt his lips on mine, not making any demands, not doing anything more than pressing down in the most chaste of kisses that he could manage. Then he pulled back just enough so we were looking in each other's eyes.

"I won't let that happen." Seifer said quietly, fiercely. "For once in your life, Squall, you're going to get what you deserve."

I closed my eyes and nodded, not trusting myself to say anything. Seifer didn't follow up his comment either. He just pulled me against him and held on tight.


	31. Chapter 31

Thirty-One - Seifer POV

Squall's words bothered me. They bothered me more than I figured they would. We were SeeD (he was, anyway) and death was something that went along with the job. The luxury, though, was you never knew when it would come, and if it did, it more than likely came fast and would hurt for only a few seconds. But Squall... Squall knew he could very well die before we got close to finishing what should've been finished in his Before. If Ultimecia was screwing with time, and already knew what her fate would be, then it really wasn't that all far-fetched that she knew Squall was an anomaly too. I'd seen the wisdom of his decision to hold to the line time wanted us to take - even though it pissed me off sometimes - and trying to keep his knowledge of the future on the down-low, but now I was glad I'd followed his lead. If he had gone all out from the beginning, it wasn't likely that Ultimecia would have allowed him to live. There was still a chance that he wouldn't make it to the end. Once we went into the Time Compression, we were in Ultimecia's world. All we had would be what we brought with us.

We landed at the old orphanage in less time than I thought we would, and I followed Squall out of the office and the Ragnarok entirely. So did everyone else. We were hiding, and we didn't care. We camouflaged the Ragnarok so it wouldn't be spotted by anyone looking for it, then entered the orphanage. Edea immediately went to try and make something to eat for us and to try and clean the place up, and we pitched in to help. It was something to do, and for me, it took my mind off the very real situation I was facing. It let me put my nervous energy to good use, rather than something more destructive, like forcing Squall into a fight or picking on Zell. Edea wouldn't have approved of either.

We had dinner and were quiet through the entire meal. We were all thinking about the same thing - what were we going to do now? Yeah, we were waiting for Esthar to contact us, but what if they didn't? If they didn't invite us back in, we would essentially be a seven-man army invading a country in order to rescue a girl who was special to us all and then use her to get at our real enemy. We'd be under siege from all sides until we actually went _into_ the Time Compression, and then all the rules would be changed. We'd be on our own. After we finished the meal, we all went our own ways, cleaning up or trying to get some sleep, or in Rinoa's case, getting some pointers on being a sorceress from Matron. Squall walked out the back of the house to the beach.

I found Squall where he sat with his back to the house, completely alone, but looking more relaxed and composed than I'd ever seen him before. He didn't even react to my approach, but I knew he'd heard me coming. I couldn't help the lazy smile that spread over my face. That right there was a measure of his trust for me, that he didn't react to my approach. I sat down beside him but didn't say anything. I stared out at the water that I used to play in as a kid and listened to the sound of the waves crashing against the sands. Then Squall settled his head against my shoulder and sighed.

"Waiting sucks." I said at last.

I felt him twitch, about the closest thing to a laugh that I was going to get out of him. He shifted, looking up at me. "Deal with it." he said softly.

I scoffed. "Your dad should know better than to keep people waiting."

Now Squall really did laugh. It was a nice sound, one I'd rarely heard before. It was deep and from the chest, barely matching the normal tenor he spoke with. Finally, he sobered, though the shadow of a grin still played on his face. "That's all he ever does." he said. "Keep people waiting."

"Tch." I rolled my eyes. "So what's the deal with you and him, anyway? Does he even know about you?"

"Sis has told him. She was there, when I was born."

"But he didn't come looking for you?"

"I don't think I was really on his priority list. Ellone had been taken, so he went hunting for her. By the time he rescued her and got back to my mother, it was too late. He knew Edea, so I guess he checked in on me, took care of me in his own way. I mean, Edea got the money to care for us somehow."

"Huh." I hadn't thought about that part. Neither Cid nor Edea really had jobs outside taking care of us. Back then, I hadn't been old enough to appreciate that. The clothes on my back came from somewhere. The food I put in my belly came from somewhere. All of that needed money. "You think your dad sent money to them to care for you?"

"I think. I don't know. Probably."

"You think he feels guilty for not being around when your mom needed him, and for not being around for you?"

He nodded, then shrugged. He said nothing.

So I took the time and used the silence to put together a working theory of my own, based on what I knew about Squall's dad, Laguna. It took me a while to put together something that I could believe, but Squall was ever quiet, just resting his head against my shoulder. Finally, I sucked in a breath and let it out in a long sigh. "I think your dad wanted to be there for you. I mean, shit, he was in the middle of a war _and_ trying to save Ellone at the same time. Yeah, I bet he felt like a douchebag for leaving your mom to deal with a pregnancy all on her own, and then dumped a little girl on her in order to go back and get the country he fucked up back to rights, and then not being there when she died and you and Sis got put in Matron's care. By the time he got around to coming back to your mom, it was too late."

Squall shifted away from me in order to look at my face. I didn't glance at him, didn't even acknowledge the movement. I was afraid that if I did, I'd stop talking.

"By then, he was the President of Esthar. I doubt it was an easy time either. So he did the only thing he could think of to protect you and Ellone. He left you with Matron. By the time everything calmed down, you were five. If he just swooped in and said 'I am your father', you'd probably freak out. Back then, you didn't react well to change. There's one time I remember, you started crying because something had happened. We'd come back from a field trip with Matron, and just stepped into the front room. No one else knew what was different, because we couldn't see it and everything looked the same to us, but you did. I _still_ don't know what happened, and I was right there next to you. It took Sis forever to get you to shut up."

Squall frowned, an unsure look. Some measure of understanding filled his grey-blue eyes. "Cid rearranged the furniture while we were out to make room for something... I don't remember what. But it was enough that I noticed it, and I thought something bad had happened. Because Cid wasn't there when we arrived and everything looked different."

I gave a slight nod. I licked my lips to continue talking. "So he left you there, where it was safe. Could you imagine what would happen if the world found out the President of Esthar had a kid? If his enemies found out? I'm sure not everyone was happy that he took out Adel and imprisoned her in space for seventeen years. If they knew about you, they'd try to kill you to break him. He'd already lost your mom; he didn't want to lose you, too. Then shit started going down again, and Matron and Cid went to hide Sis, probably at Laguna's request, and they probably would've hid you too, if Matron hadn't been a sorceress by that point. Sis was more important because of her powers, which kinda sucks, because you relied on her so much. She was the only constant in your life, since she'd been there since the beginning."

Squall's expression changed. It became blank. I knew it wasn't that way because he hated what I was saying. It was that way because, on some level, he'd figured the same thing, only he hadn't admitted it to himself by putting it into words. He turned away from me and focused on the water. His knees came up and his arms wrapped around them. The position was one he'd assumed before, when we were younger. It was his attempt to protect himself, physically and mentally. He hadn't taken that position at any time before now, which told me how sensitive a subject this was to him.

So I continued, "My guess is that, and this is going to make me sound like a total bastard, but my guess is that you looked so much like your mom that your dad couldn't stand it. You brought forward all the guilt he couldn't deal with. It was easier for him to watch you grow up from afar, to get letters about you from Matron, and to let you go with the knowledge you would never know your parents, you would never know him, and you would have an independent life, not overshadowed by him. I think meeting you for the first time since seeing you as a little kid threw him. Brought back all the memories and the guilt and everything else. He couldn't tell you. I doubt he wanted to tell you anything. You were going to go face the most dangerous sorceress in the world. If he told you right then that, oh, yeah, by the way, guess who I am, you'd probably have lost all your resolve. And I'm not saying the resolve to kill the bitch, but the resolve to come back alive. Could you live with yourself knowing that you were essentially abandoned by your only living family, that you were cast aside in favor for a girl with magic powers, and now after all that, said only living family was basically sending you off to die?"

His arms tightened around his knees. Yeah, I felt like a bastard for saying this out loud, as if he hadn't thought of all this already. He hadn't known any of this Before, but he did now. And he was still moving forward anyway. I ran a hand through my hair, then leaned back on my hands and felt the rough sand press into my flesh. "If you're this badass now, then you were just as badass then." I said. "You could've taken that power of yours, plus all those demons who are loyal to you, and destroyed everything. Took over."

"I wouldn't do that." He sounded defensive.

"I know you wouldn't. But you could have."

He turned slightly to glower at me, about as much of a reproach as I would get from him.

I gave him a mild look back.

He sighed.

"Squall, the one thing you have to realize is that you're fucking scary when you're pissed off. Especially now. And you're stable. I bet Before, when all this was going down with Rinoa and shit like you said, you weren't exactly the sanest person and you were walking around with giant ass monsters who would like nothing more than to make you happy."

His lips twitched. I could only imagine what Bahamut was saying to him. The Guardian Forces in my mind certainly were agreeing with my assessment. They loved Squall - far be it from me to know _why_ \- and they would do anything for him, including destroying anything that brought him pain.

"Now," I said, "you're still walking around with giant ass monsters who would like nothing more to make you happy, but you know everything that's going to happen. You know your relationship with your dad sucks. I mean, for Hyne's sake, you can't even decide what you want to call him. I've heard you call him 'Dad' and 'Laguna' and 'idiot', and you've probably called him other things that I won't repeat in polite company." Squall's shoulders shook as he tried to laugh silently. I grinned. "So what if you're not on good terms with him? He's your father, twenty-five percent of your DNA. That's all he is. Besides a very fat paycheck."

"Twenty-five?"

"I'm assuming seventy-five is your mother's donation."

Squall hid his face in his folded arms and shook. When he was finished with his fit, he turned to face me, eyes bright and a small smirk twisting his lips. He pushed me back onto the sands, then straddled my lap, which certainly enjoyed his presence there. He arched an eyebrow at me, to which I responded with a grin and a shrug. I wasn't going to be ashamed of him being astride me now, not after all the cock-teasing and cock-blocking he'd done lately. He leaned down and kissed me, gently. After a moment, he allowed the kiss to become hotter, slipping his tongue into my mouth. I shook the sand off my hands to be able to cup the back of his head and make the kiss even deeper, and then risked my life by squeezing his ass. His head came up from the kiss, breaking it, and he narrowed his eyes at me.

"Hey," I said with a grin, "you're the one on top of me."

His eyes narrowed even more.

"And you started it."

He grumbled, "I suppose you want me to finish it."

I grinned wider. "Of course I do. But we're on the beach, out in the open, and I'm pretty sure I don't want to share what you look like naked with anyone else. Besides, I don't want to get sand in places sand doesn't belong. You can kiss me again. We might even have enough time for a repeat performance of our little night at Fisherman's Hori-mmph!"

He sealed his mouth over mine a little forcefully, his way of telling me to shut up. I obliged him this time, giving his ass another squeeze as his tongue tangled with mine. His hips ground down against mine, sending lightning searing through my blood and up into my brain. Screw everything I just said. I wanted him now, and I didn't care who saw. My hand slid up from his ass to his back, under his jacket and shirt, to stroke the bare skin of his shoulders and the line of his spine. He arched into my touch, breaking the kiss only to breathe, then we rejoined, tongues battling. Somewhere in the back of my mind, and I was sure the same thought was in the back of his mind, I knew we were going to get caught. We wouldn't be able to get much further. Yet with each passing minute that we weren't interrupted made us bolder. Our touches became hotter and more insistent. Our bodies reacted accordingly, and I could feel his hardness pressing into my stomach. I started to fumble with the belt buckles to try and get them open, just to wrap my hand around his flesh and feel its heat and weight in my hand, like before.

Then Squall froze. I opened my eyes and stared up at his face. His eyes were bright and feral, and there was a look on his face that said he was going to kill whoever was approaching. But he rolled off me faster than I thought he could move, and with envious speed put himself back to rights. I took a little longer in calming myself down, grumbling the entire time and cursing each progressively louder footstep.

Then Zell appeared from behind the giant rocks that had shielded us. He looked shocked at seeing me there with Squall rather than Rinoa, and judging by the faint splash of red on his face, he'd probably seen a little more than I would've liked. Or maybe it was just my imagination, since he kept looking back and forth between Squall and I like he was a fat, meaty sheep and we were the wolves.

"Uh," he started, "sorry to interrupt! But it's an emergency. We got radio contact from Esthar's Presidential Palace. They have a plan to defeat Ultimecia. They want to hire SeeD to execute it, just like you said they would."

"Anything else?" Squall asked, his voice perfectly calm and quiet as if I hadn't just been feeling him up and getting him excited.

"Oh, yeah, ah... The guy we spoke to, his name's Kiros. Could he be... that Kiros?"

Squall's shoulders lifted then dropped. He got to his feet and I followed suit. "Either way, it really doesn't matter. We're going to go and see what they want."

Zell nodded and quickly turned to run back to the orphanage. Squall started back up the hill and I followed, watching his measured step. There was a hint of tenseness to it, which was probably partly my fault for bringing up and out all these emotions in him. And probably because we were interrupted before things got really, _really_ interesting. I reached to grab his wrist to stop him, and he paused, looking up at me. He didn't say anything, and neither did I. We just exchanged a look. Then we headed through the orphanage and to the Ragnarok. Just before we entered the ship, Edea came running out of the building, breathless.

"Squall!" she yelled, straining to be heard over the firing engines. "There is something I must tell you. It is about me... Yes... I believe it was thirteen years ago... This is where my story begins. I first became a sorceress when I was a child. And once again... thirteen years ago. That day... right here, I encountered a sorceress on the verge of death. I received her powers of my own will. That sorceress was an entity of fear for my children. I could not let her get to them. But... This turned out to be the beginning of my painful story. At this very minute, my bitter story has ended. I now understand that there _is_ an end, no matter how painful it may be. Therefore... Squall? You must fight to the end! Even though it may bring tragedy to others!"

I glanced at Squall, noting how he stared at Matron with a tight, almost wild gaze. He nodded rather than respond, and headed up and into the Ragnarok. I looked back at Matron, saw her eyes filled with tears, her hands clasped tight enough that her knuckles were white. She met my gaze and the tears started to fall.

"Don't worry, Matron," I yelled down to her, "I'll bring them all back. I promise you that!" _I'll bring Squall back, definitely._

I turned my back on her and headed into the ship, soon enclosed in darkness as the gangway closed behind me. The Ragnarok was quickly airborne, and we were once again on our way to Esthar.


	32. Chapter 32

Thirty-Two - Seifer POV

We arrived at Esthar in record time, since Selphie was gunning the engines and driving the Ragnarok to its fullest potential. We landed at the city's helipad, then headed down into the building and down to the streets. The elevators still weren't working, thanks to Lunatic Pandora, so we were forced to walk to the Presidential Palace. Anyone out on the streets gave us a wide berth and stared at us as we passed, their eyes filled with fear and maybe hope. I couldn't be sure. I was sure, however, that many people were staring at Rinoa, unsure what to make of her walking openly and freely. Squall and I walked on either side of her, Lion Heart and Hyperion unsheathed and ready for action. Rinoa didn't seem to notice, which was a small miracle.

No one barred our way into the Palace, though the soldiers that were there gripped their weapons tightly. Squall just kept his eyes forward and walked with purpose, forcing the rest of us to do the same. We were to be professionals right now, not gaping children. Or, in my case, a bully. Remembering Squall's quiet lecture before we left the safety of the Ragnarok brought a smirk to my face, which made at least one of the soldiers nervous enough to flinch.

Then we arrived in the President's personal chambers.

There was a tall broad-shouldered man with a scar across his face standing beside a smaller, thinner, darker skinned man. And in the corner, pointedly not paying attention to us, was a man with long hair that spilled down to the small of his back, where it was gathered into a bunny-tail. It looked incredibly ridiculous. I leaned toward Squall. "Who are they?" I whispered as quietly as I could.

Squall nodded toward the big man, "Ward." the dark-skinned man, "Kiros," and then he looked toward the third man and stayed silent.

I got it immediately. That third man became the focus of all my interest. And if I didn't like him, probably the focus of my fist.

Ward at last headed over to the third man and nudged him with a hand that was bigger than my head. Then he jerked his chin in our direction.

"Oh, sure." said the third man, a grin clearly evident in his voice. "Hey there!"

He turned around then and I felt my eyes go wide. Standing before me was an older version of Squall. A little rougher around the edges, a little more masculine, but definitely Squall. The long chocolate hair was a shade darker than Squall's, but his eyes were the same blue-grey. I could see the faint beauty both father and son shared, though Squall had a bit more of his mother in him. Laguna was slightly more muscular compared to Squall's slimness, but judging from the way he moved, they shared that same feline-esque grace that told me this old man could switch from blundering fool to focused killer in a heartbeat. Not that I'd ever call Squall a blundering idiot to his face. I didn't have a death wish. Beside me, Squall tensed and not in a good way. He'd gone into this meeting Before not knowing shit, but now he knew exactly who this man was. And he wasn't sure how to react to him, other than the professional SeeD Commander that he was.

Laguna rushed over to us, still grinning from ear to ear. "Been wanting to meet you guys! You guys are the ones who were inside my head, right? Ellone told me." His eyes flickered to Squall, and for a moment, the grin faltered. Something passed through those blue-grey eyes that was there and gone so fast that I wasn't sure I could read into the emotion behind it. But I saw Squall give the barest of nods. Then Laguna's grin returned in full force. "So I'm Laguna, President Laguna Loire of Esthar. Pleased to meet ya. If we weren't in a state of emergency, I'd talk to you some more, but... Well, whatever. Let's talk. What do you want to know?"

The dark-skinned man, Kiros, blew out a sigh. "You'll never get going if President Laguna keeps talking. So why don't you guys throw out some questions, and he'll try to answer them."

Squall stepped forward, drawing Laguna's attention to him. There again was that tight expression, and I recognized the emotion now. Guilt. Squall ignored it and said, "Just explain to us the mission to defeat Ultimecia."

Laguna's easy smile returned. "Ah, straight to the heart of the matter. Just like a workaholic SeeD."

I saw Squall's eyes narrow slightly, but anything might have said was interrupted by the arrival of Odine. The scientist strode through the room like he owned it, and a sour expression appeared on Laguna's face. The same expression appeared on Squall's. Neither of them liked Odine, but Squall was the only one who'd likely act on his intention and punt the bastard from here to Centra.

"Iz it my turn?" the scientist asked, chest puffing out.

Laguna frowned. "Yeah. Make it short and easy to understand."

"I will talk however I vant!" snapped Odine. He glowered at Laguna, then focused on us. "Egh, Sorceress Edea told me everything. Sorceress Ultimecia comes from ze future to possess ze sorceress of present day. Meaning she leaves her body in ze future and sends only her consciousness here. Does zat sound familiar to you?"

"It's exactly what Ellone does with her power." Squall said. I don't know how he managed to sound completely calm and still put that much malevolence in his voice. It made Odine quail a little, which made me smirk, but the scientist quickly got his back up.

"You're a smart one!" he said, in the most sarcastic way possible. It didn't matter. Squall one; Odine zip. "My first guess was zat someone in ze future with an ability like Ellone was sending ze sorceress back here to our time. But no! Zat is not ze answer. So how does ze sorceress come back to this time...? You vant to hear how?"

"Not really," Squall responded, still bland. "I couldn't care less how she does it, since explaining will only serve to stroke your ego. The point is she can, and she needs to be stopped. Now do you have a plan for that?"

There was a snicker from somewhere behind us. I was pretty sure it was Zell. I was grinning myself. Leave it to Squall to hamstring someone with only words. Odine glared at Squall, as if looks could kill. Squall won in that department though, his eyes growing darker the longer he stared at Odine, bringing out that feral quality in him.

"How _dare_ you-" Odine started.

Squall moved.

He moved faster than I'd ever seen him move, startling everyone in the room. I caught Rinoa's shoulder to keep her from getting in Squall's way, holding tight to her. She gave me a worried expression but I just shook my head.

Lion Heart now pressed against Odine's throat, close to slicing skin. Squall's eyes were focused on Odine's face, but I knew he had every other sense focused on the other bodies in the room with him, especially Laguna, Kiros, and Ward. He didn't doubt for a minute that we would stand still and let him do his thing, but he wasn't sure that his father wouldn't try to stop him. Though if Laguna moved, so would I.

"I don't have time for your games." Squall said, his voice a tight whisper and full of violence. "I don't need you to explain what I've already figured out. You being the stupid, prideful asshole you are probably did something and created a machine that mimicked Sis' powers. Ultimecia likely got a hold of it, did some research, and found out about Sis. So she started all of this, in order to create a world where only she exists. She needs Ellone to accomplish her goal because a machine is just a machine. It has no power except for what its creator gives it." Lion Heart bit harder into Odine's flesh.

"Squall," Laguna started. Son glanced up at father, and I saw Laguna retreat from whatever was in Squall's eyes.

So I stepped up, drawing Hyperion and setting its edge against Odine's throat as well. "Now," I started, "I'm not as nice as this guy over here." I tipped my head toward Squall. "I'd sooner slit your throat and be done with you after all the shit I've heard about you. I figure the world would be better with one less asshole in it." I saw Odine's eyes bug out of his head, so I just smiled. "If you're as smart as you are, then you'd see the wisdom of skipping over the self-importance and just giving him what he wants. Life's easier that way."

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a there-and-gone appreciative smile flash across Squall's lips. _Sure, leave it to me to say what you're thinking, Squall._ I shrugged, which made Hyperion twitch and the smell of blood filled the air. Odine whimpered. "Oops," I said, not that I felt very sorry about it.

Odine's eyes rolled back, as if he could ask for help from Laguna without actually asking for it. Squall's gaze was still focused on his dad, leaving me to deal with the scientist under our blades. Odine sniffled and gave what I figured was a very condensed version of the plan he'd come up with. Basically, we were to go into Lunatic Pandora, rescue Ellone, kill Adel, let Rinoa get possessed by Ultimecia, have Ellone send Rinoa and Ultimecia into the past, cut them off, and voila, Time Compression. Squall was the first to disengage, slowly removing Lion Heart from Odine's throat. I was quicker and far less gentle, making the bastard squeal as Hyperion's edge sliced through fragile skin again. This time Squall looked at me with a raised brow, and I only shrugged.

"What?" I asked. "It's not like he doesn't deserve it."

Odine clapped a hand to his bleeding neck and fled the room. I'm pretty sure he was crying, and I was also pretty sure he'd pissed himself. I blamed Squall for that one.

Laguna regarded the two of us with a wary stare. He wasn't quite sure what to make of us, or what to make of Squall. At last, though, he said, "Will you do it?"

Squall was silent for a long time, but he dipped his head just once in a nod.

Laguna's lips split into a wide grin. "Alright! Let's go! We'll get aboard Ragnarok! Let's do the final briefing in there! I always wanted to ride that thing. Plus the name sounds so cool!"

I leaned closer to Squall to whisper in his ear, "Are you _sure_ you're related to that guy?"

Squall's lips twitched and he glanced up at me. "I told you I took more after my mother."

"Shit."

We followed Laguna and his friends back to the Ragnarok, climbing aboard and heading to the meeting room. Laguna seemed like an energetic kid lost in a candy store, running his hands over the ship with wide, bright eyes. He touched everything. I swear it was criminal the way he caressed the seats in the meeting room. I bet Squall's mom would've been jealous. When we were all gathered, Laguna turned to face us, still grinning.

"Alright! Everyone! From here, we go straight to our final target, Ultimecia! Let's go over the plan again. First, enter Lunatic Pandora and rescue Ellone! Next, you fight Sorceress Adel! It'll be a surprise attack. Show no mercy. Now, here comes the tricky part! Adel will need to pass on her powers before being defeated." Laguna focused on Rinoa. "Rinoa, will you be willing to accept them?"

Rinoa's fists clenched and she got that stubborn clench to her jaw. "Yes!"

"Good!" said Laguna. "Next, we wait for Sorceress Ultimecia to possess Rinoa! This'll be hard on you, Rinoa, but will you do it?"

Rinoa glanced from me to Squall, from Squall to me, then back to Laguna. Her jaw still had that stubborn quality, but her body had tensed as taut as a bowstring. I wanted to touch her, to comfort her, but I was sure she'd snap if I did. "...Yes." she answered.

Laguna grinned widely. "That's the spirit! Then, Ellone sends Rinoa and Ultimecia to the past! Ellone brings back Rinoa! Then, head to the future through compressed time! Ultimecia lives far in the future where none of us can technically exist. There's only one way to make yourself exist in a world like that! As friends, don't forget one another! As friends, believe in one another! Believe in your friends' existence! And they'll also believe in yours. To be friends, to like one another, and to love one another... You can't do these things alone. You need somebody. Right, guys? What place reminds you of your friends? Imagine being in that place with all your friends. Once Time Compression begins, think of that place and try to get there! That's all! That place will welcome you. You'll be able to get there no matter what period you're in! You need love and friendship for this mission! And the courage to believe it. It's all about love, friendship, and courage! I'm counting on you guys!"

The speech left me a little sick to my stomach, because my brain couldn't comprehend how this babbling idiot was somehow one half of the genetic mix that made up the brunette beside me. They were as different as night and day, and it was a little bit terrifying. Because, had Squall grown up any other way than he did, he might have been just like his dad. I shuddered. The others began to file out of the room, whispering amongst themselves. I started for the door myself, then froze as I realized Squall wasn't following me. I turned back to return to him, but I saw his fingers flex. It was a dismissive gesture. He wanted me to go. He wanted to be alone with his father. And damn me to hell if I wasn't curious about what he was going to say. But I knew eavesdropping on the conversation would be worth my life or my balls, and I valued both. So I cocked my head at Squall, earning a short smile and a nod in return. Only then did I leave, allowing the door to close behind me.

Then I took up a position on the opposite wall, folded my arms over my chest, and waited.


	33. Chapter 33

Thirty-Three - Squall POV

I was alone for the first time with my father. And, ironically, I was terrified. Before, I hadn't known this man I was standing before was my father. I hadn't known anything about my family, or that I'd had any to begin with, other than Ellone. But then, she wasn't actually my biological sister, just my adopted one. My mother cared for her after her own parents had been killed. She had been there when I had been born. But this man made me. Seifer's words echoed in my head as I stared at Laguna, and my resentment and anger toward him abated somewhat. So I studied him as he studied me, and I realized that Laguna was just as unsure about me as I was about him, though for a different reason entirely. He was unsure about my intent in staying behind when everyone left. I didn't doubt for a minute that he'd seen the way Seifer and I had silently communicated, and he knew that I was the one who held Seifer's leash. Of course, he could still just be nervous from the display I'd given in the Presidential Palace. I should've controlled myself better, but I hated Odine more than I'd hated anything else in my life. Sure, Adel was to blame for abducting Sis in the first place, but it was Odine who forced my father to stay behind in Esthar after sending Ellone back to Raine to protect her. Odine, and his stupid research.

"Is there something you want to ask me?" Laguna said, his voice deceptively quiet.

I flicked my gaze up to his face. The fear was gone, the nervousness was gone, and there was that cool warrior's gaze that he'd had when in battle. He was assessing me. He already knew he wouldn't survive if he chose to attack me, but he didn't know what my trigger would be.

My lips twitched into a bitter smile. As much as I resented him, I still loved him. "Did Sis give you my message?"

For a moment, Laguna's brow knitted together in confusion. Then his eyes went wide. "Squall, I-"

I waved my hand to cut him off. "I know. I know you would've been there if you could."

"How did you find out?"

 _Oh, I've just done this all before, and I know everything that's going to happen, except for what happens after we kill Ultimecia._ I couldn't very well come out and _say_ that. So I opted for the next best thing. It wasn't exactly a lie. "I was in your head, thanks to Sis. It wasn't hard to put two and two together."

Laguna's lips thinned. I don't know if he realized I was bending the truth a bit. He stepped closer to me, an arm's length away. He reached out, and I noticed that his hand was shaking slightly. It stopped shaking when it touched my cheek, and my father's eyes began to water. "You look exactly like Raine. Exactly like your mother. When I saw you... damn it, I'm sorry."

He pulled me tight against him, hugging me tight. I stood stiffly for a minute before I awkwardly returned the hug. He held tight to me for I don't know how long, but I could feel him shaking. My own chest felt tight; I told myself I wasn't going to cry.

"Elle told me." Laguna said, his words murmured into my hair. "She told me that she'd found you, that you saved her from a monster, and you told her to tell me..." His voice faltered. "I couldn't believe it. You were just a baby when your mother died. Then you were sent to the orphanage... and I..."

"It's fine." I said, not trusting myself to speak louder than a whisper. "You said it yourself. You would've come back if you could."

"I would have. In a heartbeat, I would have. I would've given up all of this to be with you and your mother and Ellone. The four of us, a family. As it was, I lost all of you. I lost you, and you grew up without knowing me, without knowing how much I loved you and your mother. And to meet like this..." He drew back and let me go. "I have to let you go again. I have to watch you go off to war, finish what I practically started, and know you might not come back."

I shrugged. "It has to be done."

"You shouldn't be the one to do it."

I just looked at him. He tensed. "We're the only ones with the strength to do it. If I backed out now, because you didn't want to lose me, then I'd be letting them down. My friends need me, too, just as much as you do." I said quietly. "Maybe more so."

"Squall-"

"I scared you, didn't I? When I protected Rinoa, and then with Odine." Laguna's face darkened. He didn't have to admit it aloud; I could see it in his expression. I held out my hand, palm up. "This is what I am, you know. A SeeD. A killer. A soldier. I don't know how to be a son, or much of anything else."

Laguna laughed with a relieved note to it. "I barely know how to be a father. I wasn't a very good one to Ellone, and I never was one to you. Sometimes I wonder if I'm even a good leader."

"If you weren't, things would've gone to hell long before now."

"I suppose you're right."

We lapsed into silence for a time, just staring at each other. I couldn't figure out anything else to say. At least, I couldn't figure out anything to say that wouldn't take more time than I actually had right now to talk about. And Laguna was still torn up about my mother, if the tears he was fighting back were any indication of how much he was feeling right now. It probably wouldn't be good for either of us to bring up memories of her and then let him watch me walk out of his life, perhaps permanently. But I was out of time, anyway. I needed to go kill a sorceress.

"When I get back," I started. Faltered. Swallowed. Tried again. "When I get back, I want to spend more time with you. To get to know you. And Mom."

"Sure. Anything you want."

I knew he was going to start crying the minute I turned my back and walked out of the room, but I did it anyway. I paused at the threshold to the door, my hand hovering over the panel that would open it and let me out into the hallway. If he called my name, if he called me back, I probably would lose all the resolve I'd had since the beginning of all this. He didn't. I set my hand against the panel and the door slid open.

"Squall," Laguna called, "I'd like it if you'd explain to me how you knew _before_ Elle started sending you back into my past."

I glanced at him, my face blank. I didn't give him an answer; I simply stepped out into the hallway and let the door shut behind me. I wasn't surprised to find Seifer waiting for me in the hall. He glanced at my face, then canted his head to the side. I waved my hand in dismissal.

"I guess as reunions go, that one was tame." Seifer said after a minute. "I was expecting yelling."

I shrugged.

"You saying there just might be yelling?"

I shrugged again.

"Fuck, I'd pay to see that. Father and son, duking it out. Of course, I'd bet on you. It's only proper, considering I _am_ your boyfriend."

My lips twitched into a smile, which I figured was his intent. I started walking down the hallway, and he fell into step beside me. Just before we reached the bridge, Seifer caught my shoulder and turned me just enough so I could see his face. He leaned down and kissed me. I kissed him back, almost desperately. Being so close to breaking down in front of my father, of losing everything, and then hearing the last thing he said to me, knowing that I'd screwed up... Laguna wasn't pressing the issue because there were more important things right now. I was glad of that.

Mostly because I wasn't sure if I was going to survive this time around.

Seifer pulled back, his expression revealing that he'd sensed my shift in mood. His shifted to match mine, and there was no more time for simple romance - or lack there of - between us. He sighed.

"All right." he said. "Let's go kill us a sorceress."

We entered the cockpit together. Everyone was there, watching Lunatic Pandora grow larger and larger. I stared at the structure, remembering the last time I saw it. There was the flicker of shields. Just like Before, Selphie took too much glee in firing the machine guns and the main cannon, busting a big hole through the shields. The nose of the ship shoved through the hole just before it could close, giving us our way in. I gave control of the ship over to my father, Kiros, and Ward, and followed my friends out onto Lunatic Pandora.

Seifer whistled and looked at me. "I really was in control of this thing?"

I nodded, then shrugged.

"More or less, huh?"

"It'll probably go easier, this time around." I replied.

"Oh?"

"Yeah. We don't have to fight Raijin and Fujin, or you."

"Did they kick your ass?"

I just looked at him.

He sighed. "A man can dream, can't he?"

I smiled and shrugged. Seifer sighed and leaned his head back, studying the outside facade of Lunatic Pandora. I could see his mind working, but I didn't ask him what he was thinking about. I wasn't sure what I wanted to know what he was thinking right now anyway. So I turned my attention to the others.

"We're in." I said, when they all looked at me. "This is where it gets rough. We can't let our guard down. This place belongs to the enemy. We'll probably get into a fight before we even reach Adel. Our top priority is rescuing Ellone."

"And then kicking some sorceress ass!" Zell shouted, punching the air. Then he looked at Rinoa, startled. "Sorry. I didn't... well, uh..."

Rinoa smiled. "It's fine. I'm the good sorceress, you know? But if you ever piss me off, I reserve the right to sic my knights on you."

"Y-your knights?"

Rinoa casually pointed to Seifer and myself. Zell went about three shades too pale. I gripped Lion Heart's hilt and drew the blade, keeping it down against my thigh. "Let's go. The longer we stand around talking, the more likely it is that Adel wakes up. Then we're all screwed."

I took the lead. The others fell in behind me, all holding tight to their own weapons. Seifer walked close to Rinoa, a solid shield when I had to be the sword. Rinoa walked with confidence, but I could tell by her footfalls she was terrified. She wanted to do nothing more than run away, but it was her loyalty and determination that was keeping her moving forward. I led my pride into the enemy's den, carefully listening to the sounds echoing through the halls of Lunatic Pandora.

They were exactly as I remembered them from Before. Without Fujin and Raijin to slow us down, we eased right into the main hall and started heading toward the heart of Lunatic Pandora. There were the expected skirmishes, as Galbadian soldiers crawled all over the place, but the true challenge came when the Mobile Type Eight pounced on us out of nowhere. If I hadn't been expecting such a surprise, I probably wouldn't have been able to react in time. The machine didn't take long to go down, and we took a few minutes to make sure we were all whole and relatively unwounded. Then I led us into the next room, unsure of what I would find.

There was that kid again, Seifer's replacement. He was holding tight to Sis' arm, preventing her from running anywhere. She looked terrified, more scared than she'd been Before. When she saw us, hope sprang into her eyes, but Ultimecia's replacement knight yanked her behind him, half shielding her, and half daring us to go through him to get to her. Little did he know I was prepared to do just that.

"Just sit tight, Sis." Seifer called out. "We'll be over in a second."

Ellone smiled, then whimpered as the replacement knight shoved her to the ground. He kept a tight hold on her arm, which meant she had to lift it into an awkward position to keep it from being twisted uncomfortably. This situation was different than Before, because it had been Fujin and Raijin holding Ellone, rather than Seifer. He had been above us, like a lord, staring down his nose at us. His friends had abandoned him when they saw the truth of what he'd become. Oh, they still loved him, and they would continue to follow him in a heartbeat if, and only if, he stopped following Ultimecia's orders. But he had been so far gone under her spell that there was no redeeming him then. Now, though, Seifer was on my side. Now, though, we didn't have Fujin and Raijin to err on the side of conscience and let Ellone go. This time, we would have to rescue her.

So I said the same thing I'd said to Seifer Before. "Are you gonna continue with this knight thing?"

The replacement laughed. "The knight has retired. Call me a young revolutionary?"

"What do you think you're doing, exactly?" I asked. I gestured to Ellone. "Do you think if you give her over to Ultimecia, she'll actually reward you for it?"

"She's been playing you from the beginning, kid." Seifer called. He stepped up to my side with Rinoa between us. We were flanking her, one on each side, true knights to a true sorceress. "She's only out for herself. You're expendable, especially once you've lost your usefulness."

"You're lying! Lady Ultimecia promised me power! Strength! She's given me the courage to take what I want! I don't wanna stop. I'm gonna keep running! I've come this far... I'm gonna make it to the end, to the goal! There's no way I'm sharing it with you!"

He released Ellone for the barest of seconds. I saw it and moved forward, Lion Heart drawing back for a hard swing that would take the kid's head if he didn't dodge. The problem was, if he did retreat and escape my attack, he'd leave Ellone in my hands. If he stayed, he died. I wasn't taking any chances this time. I was going all out. Ellone saw me coming and screamed, raising her hands to cover her face. Her reaction startled the replacement knight the most, rather than me and the iridescent blue gunblade coming straight for his face. In the split second that it took for me to continue the follow-through of my swing, the replacement knight made his decision, and flung himself away from Ellone and me.

He counterattacked with a fireball bigger than both of us, apparently convinced that it would be better if Ellone was dead, and if I was dead with her.

Ifrit landed in front of us, bellowing as the fireball struck him square in his chest. His arms wrapped around it, hugging it tight as if the fire was his beloved child. Ellone screamed as I grabbed her, turning my back to Ifrit and the fire, shielding Sis with my own body. I could feel the searing heat against my back, and grit my teeth from the intense pain. Even though I wasn't being burned, it still hurt like hell. Hurt worse than the fireballs Seifer had launched at me. Hurt worse than when I first received the scar between my eyes. Then Ifrit knelt, and his bulk cut off the fire, giving me precious relief.

 _Get back, Squall._ Ifrit snarled. _Get out of the way. I can't hold this back forever._

I grit my teeth as I got to my feet, hauling Ellone with me. I pulled her away from Ifrit, toward Rinoa and Seifer and the others. Seifer was standing at the forefront of the group, his hand up and in a fist, his emerald eyes burning. Rinoa left his shadow to grab me and Ellone, pulling us back into the safety of the group. Cool, soothing healing magic flowed through me, Rinoa's hands gentle upon my back. I heard Ifrit let out a roar before he vanished from our plane. Seifer sucked in a breath as Ifrit returned to his mind and cursed.

"Squall," Ellone started, her voice shaking, "are you okay?"

"I'm fine." I nodded at Rinoa. She nodded back and withdrew her hands. "Sis, go wait outside. Laguna should be here soon."

Ellone gripped my arms, her eyes searching my face. I nodded and gave her a light shove. She was reluctant to leave me, especially because I was still wincing like I was hurt, but she also knew she would just get in the way. I'd told her on the Moon Base that if I told her to go, she was to go. She'd agreed. But she hesitated, then pressed her lips to my forehead.

"Come back to us, Squall." she whispered. Then Sis ran out of the room, right into my father's waiting arms, or so I hoped.

I didn't bother responding, first because she was out of earshot, and second because I didn't want to let anyone else hear that I wasn't confident that I would make it out alive. Now it was just us facing the replacement knight, and Rinoa went back to healing me. I looked at Seifer and canted my head to the side slightly.

Hyperion swung free of its sheath, bright and deadly. "You got it, Commander. One bastard knight, going down." Seifer said, growling out his words. "Let's go, Zell."

"Uh, right."

If I hadn't been there watching it, then I wouldn't have believed the two could actually work together so well. Seifer had the longer reach with Hyperion, but Zell could move faster, throwing punches lightning quick. He positioned the replacement knight for Seifer's attacks to connect, Hyperion's blade slicing flesh or striking against metal if the other knight was able to block the attack. With Selphie acting as their healer, the two could go as all out as they wanted to. Irvine and Quistis hung back to protect Rinoa and myself, though they looked as though they wanted to join in the fight taking place before them. I reached up to grip Rinoa's wrist, causing her to look at me, startled.

"You have to let him take you," I whispered to her.

"What?" Her eyes were wide, confused and shocked at the same time. "What are you talking about Squall?"

I looked toward the replacement knight, who was now on his knees, barely able to stay upright. Zell and Seifer stood over him, panting themselves. They hadn't killed him, which was good. I suppose it had been Seifer's call, because Hyperion's blade rested against the back of the replacement knight's neck. One move, and the kid would lose his head.

Rinoa's eyes went wider. "You... You want him to kidnap me?"

I looked back at her. "It's the only way we'll reach Adel. Don't be scared. Seifer and I, we'll be right there to get you back and safe."

Her tongue darted out to lick her lips. Then her eyes narrowed and her fists clenched. "I'm scared, but... I'll do it. I'm a sorceress now, and I'm going to prove I can be a good one. Which means defeating the bad one." She sucked in a deep breath. "Besides, I promised Laguna."

I smiled but it didn't quite have enough feeling to it. "You can do this, Rinoa. I believe in you."

She grinned at me, then stepped away from me. Her movement caught the replacement knight's eyes, as it did Seifer's. Hyperion lifted for the barest of moments. The kid dipped a hand into his coat and pulled out something I couldn't make out. It was only after he tossed it to the ground that I realized it was a flash bomb.

The bright light blinded all of us, and I was suddenly shoved to the side as someone shouldered past me. Rinoa let out a breathless shriek, and I felt her presence torn from my side as acutely as if she had been holding on to me. When the light cleared, and my eyes healed from the abuse they had taken, I found that Rinoa was indeed gone, as was the replacement knight.

Zell rushed back into the room a second later. "Squall! That bastard's got Rinoa!"

I surged to my feet and felt Seifer steady me as I stumbled. Even Zell looked at me concerned. I tried to ignore the look. Rinoa had healed my burns from the fire until the heat was just a memory, but it was that memory that was incapacitating me even this slightly. I forced myself to still, to turn off the part of my mind that was still reeling in pain. I didn't have time for this.

I shook Seifer off. "Let's just go after him."

Zell didn't hesitate; he and the others took off out of the room, racing up the stairs after Rinoa. Seifer looked at me with a dark scowl. I gave him a mild look in return.

"I'm fine." I said softly.

"You're not fine."

"Thanks to you, I'm fine."

He cursed under his breath. "You know, that demon came out on his own. I didn't have to even ask him to do it."

"Jealous?"

"Fuck, no. He's fucking fire-proof. I'm not."

I laughed, which made Seifer smile. I sighed and started toward the room's exit. Seifer was right behind me, Hyperion flashing with each swing of his arm. Together, we brandished our gunblades and started up the stairs to join the others, and get our sorceress back.


	34. Chapter 34

Thirty-Four - Seifer POV

We entered the next room, ready to do some serious damage. The brat Ultimecia had chosen to be my replacement was standing far too close to Adel's Tomb, and he was gripping Rinoa by one arm and her hair, keeping her head yanked back so she couldn't struggle without hurting herself. Her face was set in a determined grimace, dealing with the pain because she knew she had to. Her golden eyes locked onto mine, then slid to Squall's. Squall gave her the barest of nods, then lifted Lion Heart and set himself into a stance that would allow him to react offensively or defensively, depending on what the situation needed. The others ranged around us, all clutching their weapons. I kept Hyperion still at my side, since my one handed grip allowed me the ability to move offensively at the same time I moved defensively. The one-handed style I'd learned was more off-balance than Squall's two-handed style, since his center of gravity was more stable, but mine was more unpredictable, and I could move and strike anywhere.

"Rinoa and Adel!" shouted the replacement knight, leering with an ugly, wide-eyed, fanatic look on his face. It made me shudder, because that had been me, in Squall's Before. "The sorceresses as one! Watch closely!"

Before any of us could react, the knight swung Rinoa as hard as he could toward the tomb. Rinoa took a few steps forward before she became overbalanced and fell to her hands and knees. She looked up, and her entire body froze. In any other situation, she probably would have screamed and tried to run, but the brave warrior Squall had forged her to be just got shakily to her feet as Adel shattered her bonds and reached toward her. She threw her arms up to shield her face as Adel's hand closed around her.

The next thing I saw made me sick.

Rinoa was partially absorbed into Adel, sticking out of the sorceress' chest. It was the grossest thing I had ever seen. It made me hate myself a little more because, Before, I had been the one to put her there. I gripped Hyperion's hilt tighter, clenching my teeth.

 _Now isn't the time for guilt._ Ifrit said, sounding tired and hurt. He was nursing his wounds in a far corner of my mind, burned by the intense flames he'd stopped to save Squall and Ellone.

 _I'm not feeling guilty._ I protested.

Ifrit looked at me, his eyes narrowed. _You're a terrible liar, Almasy._

 _Shut the hell up._

Selphie started toward Squall. "We have to save Rinoa!"

"Just go for Adel." Squall ordered. "Send healing spells Rinoa's way, but don't summon any Guardian Forces and don't use limit breaks. Anything that causes an area of effect will hurt Rinoa as much as it'll hurt Adel."

That being said, Squall launched himself toward Adel, thunder cracking as he pulled the trigger. Adel reeled from the slice of the blade and the impact of the bullet, and Rinoa let out a moan as Adel took revenge on Squall's boldness by drawing health from the younger sorceress. I immediately understood why Squall had said to focus on healing Rinoa; every time we attacked and injured Adel, she would heal herself by drawing upon Rinoa's life force. If we didn't heal Rinoa, then she definitely was going to die.

That pissed me off so much.

And I understood why Squall had held out so long, refusing to tell me more details than the obvious.

Since Squall was handicapped because he couldn't use Renzokuken, the fight took longer than it probably should have. We all helped out in our own ways - me, Irvine, and Zell focused on attacking when Squall needed to take a breather, and Selphie and Quistis focused on healing Rinoa rather than attacking, though they did take pot shots now and then when one of the boys needed to step back and take the opportunity to catch his breath or get healing himself. Adel was strong, stronger than anyone we'd ever faced. Only Squall seemed to still have the confidence that we would beat Adel and we would get Rinoa back. He kept going with a single-minded focus, giving the others the strength to keep going as well. I just let go and struck at Adel with one-handed strikes, cutting away into her flesh and bathing Hyperion in her blood. Those wounds didn't last long, only because she was drawing upon Rinoa's life to heal herself. It was enough to make anyone want to give up.

Except giving up would mean Rinoa's death, and I wouldn't have that.

Neither would Squall.

With a serious expression he kept battering at Adel, Lion Hart flashing this way and that, spraying blood with each swing. Even as Adel fought back and scored hits on him if he wasn't fast enough to get out of the way, he refused to stop.

This was the man who was the Commander of SeeD. The man who inspired people to fight even if victory looked bleak. The man whose silent courage and refusal to give up gave the rest of us the strength and the belief to keep going.

 _No wonder he kicked my ass so many times Before. He wasn't about to let anyone or anything stand in his way of doing what needed to be done. And now, he's doing it to protect the rest of us._

 _Squall is very loyal._ came Carbuncle's voice, echoing inside my head. _Before, he fought hard because he didn't have much of a choice. It was SeeD's duty to kill sorceresses and protect the world. But now, he doesn't want to lose anyone else he cares about. He fights because he loves everyone, and he doesn't want them to suffer like he did, like they did, Before._

 _He feels deeply._ Ifrit added, rumbling lowly. _He still sucks at showing it, though._

Despite myself, I grinned. _Don't I know it._

I rushed forward this time with Squall, coming abreast of him. He barely spared me a glance, trusting me to know what the hell I was doing. In tandem, we struck, twisting and dancing around each other as our gunblades bit into Adel's body. Above us, Rinoa whimpered and moaned as the pain from our attacks translated into her life being slowly drained away. But Adel was starting to flag, her motions becoming more and more sluggish as we continued our relentless assault. And, just when I thought _I_ was going to die of exhaustion, Rinoa wrenched her arm free of Adel's chest. She reached out to me and I grabbed a tight hold on her forearm, clutching tight to her as she grabbed tightly to me. Squall continued his assault, wearing Adel down further until Rinoa was able to wrench her other arm free.

He grabbed her free hand, and together Squall and I pulled as hard as we could. Adel's dying body refused to give Rinoa up for a few tense minutes, but at last the bitch sorceress' flesh parted and Rinoa fell toward the two of us. Adel shrieked and writhed, but she was already dying. There wasn't anything she could do to us now. Her narrowed, golden eyes focused on Rinoa, her ruined chest rising and falling with ragged breaths.

"Ready?" Squall asked Rinoa so softly I barely heard him.

She swallowed hard. "Y-yeah."

He let her go. So did I. Rinoa held her arms out to her sides, palms up, fingers slightly curled toward them. She closed her eyes and tilted her head back slightly, looking completely relaxed. I tensed as Adel reached toward her, but Squall set a gentle yet firm restraining hand on my bicep to keep me from running forward. Rinoa almost began to glow with a sickly light, and I realized that she was beginning to absorb Adel's powers.

"Right," I whispered, mostly to myself rather than Squall, "a sorceress can't die until she passes her powers on."

Squall only nodded. He turned slightly to the side, his gaze on the doorway behind us. I turned as well, watching as Laguna and Ellone ran into the room, seemingly breathless. Ellone looked nervous, but Laguna only looked determined.

He spared a glance at Squall, then focused on Ellone. "Ellone!" he shouted at her. "Now's your chance!"

Ellone nodded and raised her arms toward Rinoa and Adel. I didn't see anything happen, but suddenly Rinoa's eyes rolled up into her head and she collapsed to the ground. Squall still kept that restraining hand on me, his eyes focused on Rinoa.

"Okay, Ellone." Laguna said, his voice calm and soothing. "Just get Rinoa back."

Again, I didn't see anything, but soon Rinoa began to stir. Her eyes fluttered open, honey-colored and kind, and she pushed herself upright. She shuddered, suddenly brushing at her arms as if she was trying to clear cobwebs off them.

"I..." Rinoa stopped. Swallowed hard and tried again. "I... was inside Adel. The young Adel..."

"Ultimecia's inside Adel." Laguna said. "Exactly as she wanted. Okay, this is the showdown folks!" He clapped his hand as he turned to face us. Everyone gathered around Squall and I. Laguna grinned at all of us. "Time compression is about to begin. 'Love, friendship, and courage'! Show 'em what you got!"

"Just get out of here." Squall said, his voice soft. "You don't want to get caught in it."

Laguna flashed him a worried smile, then grabbed Ellone and hauled ass out of the room, just as it started to bubble and twist. Portions of the wall broke apart and became spherical, bouncing through the air like bubbles. The floor beneath us rippled and suddenly, we all dropped through into some kind of void that rippled and bubbled as if we were underwater. Which it seemed we were, since it felt as though we were in the ocean deeps.

"Where are we supposed to go!?" Quistis yelled, her voice filled with panic.

Squall, his voice as calm as ever, shouted back, "To Edea's house!"

Rinoa shivered, her eyes tear-bright. "I'll... probably disappear..."

Squall and I grabbed her at the same time, holding her steady between us. Squall cupped her chin and forced her to meet his stormy eyes. "You aren't going to disappear. I won't let that happen. Neither will Seifer. Just stay by our side."

Rinoa sniffled a little bit, but nodded. I glanced at Squall. He gave a simple shoulder lift in response. Neither of us knew what Rinoa had seen during the time she was inside young Adel, but whatever it was, it had been enough to shatter that bravery she'd held onto all this time. There wasn't time for us to say anything more, though, either to find out more or bolster her confidence or comfort her so she wouldn't start crying in fear.

We fell out of the ocean and down through the sky. Our wild freefall continued, with none of us really knowing if we would go _splat_ at the end of it all or if something else would happen. Squall, of course, was the only one who seemed calm. I didn't think that was fair, considering he knew we were going to survive this Time Compression. I mean, I knew, too, because he'd told me, but watching the world quickly coming up to meet your face without any way of being able to stop yourself from being splattered into red goop could make even the bravest person shit his pants.

Thankfully, I didn't do that. Because that would be incredibly embarrassing.

The sky began to twist and change then, becoming a vortex of swirling colors and images. At last, we landed in a room that had only blank walls and nothing else. Squall readied Lion Heart, prompting me to unsheathe Hyperion again, and then we were thrown into battle.

"A sorceress?" I gasped, startled to see the twisted visage of the woman standing before me, trying to end us with her power.

"She's just a shade. One of many sorceresses throughout time." Squall answered. "Past and future, perhaps. Don't stop. Go through them."

He accented his words by unleashing Renzokuken, the powerful limit break hacking our current opponent into a dozen pieces. There was no blood. There was no body when Squall stepped back. The sorceress just crumpled in on herself and vanished into darkness. The second one followed quickly after the first. Just when I thought we'd spend forever fighting sorceresses from the past and future, we arrived at the orphanage. Everything was normal. The stone was as I remembered it, broken but whole, welcoming. When Squall said to take a few minutes to catch our breath, we all sprawled out on the floor and tried to stop shaking. Squall went to stand by the door that would take us to the beach, staring out of it at the world we were about to enter.

I moved to stand beside him. "This is it, huh?"

He shook his head. "It's almost it."

"How much longer until we reach Ultimecia?"

"Hours."

"What do we have to do?"

He looked up at me. His expression seemed worried. It wasn't an expression I was used to seeing on his face.

"What is it?" I asked.

He looked away from me and back outside. "When we reach her castle," he said softly, "all of our abilities become sealed. Everything."

I felt the blood drain from my face. "Even..." I waved my hand toward my head.

Squall nodded. His fists clenched.

"Why didn't you tell me that when you were explaining all this to me?"

His fists clenched harder and his shoulders became so tight I was amazed he didn't tear something. "I forgot."

"You for-" I stopped and rubbed my temple. He looked down at his boots, growing tenser with each passing moment. "Okay, so you forgot. After all you've been through, I can't blame you."

He glanced up at me, his lips a thin line.

I smiled, hoping that it looked more cocky than I actually felt. "I'm pretty sure I can fend the bitch off this time. Yeah, I know we'll be on her home turf, but I got me a new sorceress." I jerked my thumb over my shoulder toward Rinoa. "She can control me if I start getting out of hand. I know she can."

Squall's expression didn't change. He glanced at Rinoa, then back to me. "I hope so."

I wanted to take him in my arms and hold him close and tight. I wanted to kiss him. I wanted to tell him that everything was going to be just fine, that we were going to be okay, that we were going to survive everything we threw ourselves at. I said nothing. I didn't reach to touch him or pull him close. I just looked at him and offered a little smile. It took him a moment to return the smile, and then it vanished as he steeled himself for the next leg of our journey. He turned to look at the rest of the group, sweeping his eyes over them as critically as a general might inspect his troops.

Rinoa was the first to get up. Zell was quickly second, followed by Selphie, Quistis, and Irvine. No one said a word. We kept our weapons out and ready, even Squall, before we walked out of the orphanage and onto the beach.

"What the hell..." I breathed.

Before us was a battlefield, or what was left of one. In the distance, anchored to the beach by thick chains larger than a man, was a gigantic castle. Strewn on the ground around the chains were still bodies. Bodies in SeeD uniforms. Lots of them.

"...Future SeeDs..." Squall said, his voice tight and whisper-like. "We're fighting across generations."

"Fuck." I cursed. I wasn't the only one. The others let out expletives and gasps, the sight before us driving home the need to defeat Ultimecia and protect everything that was dear to us. I looked at Squall.

He didn't look at me. He only started forward.

And the rest of us followed behind him, good little soldiers heading to the battle.


	35. Chapter 35

Thirty-Five - Squall POV

We arrived on the castle steps, staring up at the abode of our enemy. It was as impressive and as terrifying as I remembered it being. The gargoyles seemed just as fierce as they had Before. The turrets and buttresses still seemed huge and foreboding as they had Before. I looked at the front door, knowing what lay on the other side. I had forgotten about it. How Ultimecia had stolen our abilities and had sealed them. The only way we had gotten them back was to defeat the monsters she had guarding those abilities. When we stepped foot in that castle, her powers would affect us, steal our abilities.

Make Seifer vulnerable.

I hated myself for forgetting that part.

Before, I had been so focused on getting the job done that I had just blown through the enemies that had sealed our abilities, getting them all back as we moved through the castle toward our ultimate goal. I remembered that defeating the monsters would allow us to pick one ability to unlock, and if we wanted them all, we would have to kill all the beasts. I had picked them in the order of necessity Before. I had chosen command ability, resurrection, limit break, item, magic, and Guardian Forces in that order, before we had gone on to kill Ultimecia. This time, to protect Seifer, I would have to pick the Guardian Forces over everything else, and that choice could very well get us all killed.

Seifer had told me that Rinoa could control him, using the sorceress-knight bond. I wasn't even sure that would work. Sure, she was a sorceress who had two knights, but that sort of thing had never been done before. A sorceress only ever had just one knight. I couldn't even be sure that Rinoa _would_ be able to control Seifer if Ultimecia started to get into his mind. Of course, I had also force-junctioned Carbuncle into Seifer's mind, so I couldn't even be sure that the lock on the GF ability would affect him. Force-junctioning was something that had never been done before, either.

"...Whoa...!" Zell said, breaking my reverie. "So this is her castle?"

"Finally," Selphie breathed.

Irvine whistled lowly. "I've never seen anything so creepy. You think what's-her-face really lives here?"

Rinoa clenched her fists. "We've come this far. She's gotta be here."

"So this is the future... This is where Ultimecia reigns..." Quistis was staring up at the castle, a look of trepidation on her face.

"Well, we're still here." Seifer said, his hands on his hips and a cocky grin on his face. "I think we still have some time to dick around before we have to go finish our job."

"Seifer, we're on a mission!" Quistis looked scandalized that Seifer would say such a thing. I knew why he did; his humor caused smiles to bloom on the faces of Zell, Irvine, Selphie, and Rinoa, did far more to relax them and give them confidence than he probably intended. Seeing that Seifer was unrepentant, Quistis looked toward me, as if expecting me to do something about him. When I didn't, she huffed and asked, "What are we going to do, Squall?"

 _We're going to kill a sorceress and hope we don't die in the process this time around. We're going to hope that I don't end up going back to the beginning of all this again, or disappear forever, or end up dead myself after all is said and done._ Knowing Seifer could read all of this on my face, and _how_ he could read my expressions I didn't know, I buried those thoughts deep enough in my mind before I turned around to face her. "We're going to divide into two parties. Then we're going inside, and we're going to make Ultimecia wish she had never tried this in the first place."

I put Seifer and Rinoa with me, just in case something bad did happen so only Rinoa and I had to deal with it, and I put the other four in another party with Zell as the leader. Then we headed inside.

Seifer, Rinoa, and I started moving second, letting the others take the first path. As soon as we were away from the others and heading down a hallway, I stopped to look at Seifer. He raised a hand to his head, his eyes going slightly unfocused. Then he shook his head.

"I don't hear him." he said.

"Who?" Rinoa asked.

"Carbuncle." Seifer tapped the side of his head. "Squall force-junctioned a Guardian Force to me, to protect my thoughts and mind from the influence of Ultimecia. When we walked in here, all of our abilities, including the GF's, were sealed away."

Rinoa's eyes went wide. "Oh, Seifer, are you okay?"

I looked at Seifer, searching his face for some indication that he was in pain or that something had shifted in his demeanor. He only smiled in that cocky way of his but met my eyes with a stern emerald gaze.

"I'm fine. I don't hear anything but my own thoughts."

"Maybe she doesn't realize we're here yet." Rinoa said, lifting her voice slightly at the end to make the statement sound like a question.

"Oh, she knows we're here." Seifer said. "I don't think she cares. She's gotten what she's wanted. We're the only ones left standing in her way. She gets rid of us, and voila, she wins."

"...She could use you to kill us." I pointed out.

Seifer's eyes narrowed dangerously as he focused on me. "I won't let that happen. Look, Squall, you've done what you could to protect me this far, but this is one fight I might have to deal with on my own. Maybe with Rinoa acting as backup. You can't help me anymore."

I hated that the words hurt. I looked away from him. He was right, of course. Until we killed the first monster, we couldn't use the GFs, and Seifer would be vulnerable. On the other hand, I had force-junctioned Carbuncle onto him, so there was always that chance that Carbuncle wouldn't be able to junction with Seifer this time without Seifer's permission.

"I won't put myself at risk on purpose, Squall. But we don't have the time to waste on what ifs, you know?"

"..."

Seifer sighed. Ignoring the presence of Rinoa, he reached out and hooked his arm around my shoulders to pull me close to him. Then he kissed me, sealing his mouth over mine. I wanted to push him away, but instead I pushed closer, deepening the kiss and letting him know in the only way I could how I felt. When we parted, Seifer rested his forehead against mine, staring into my eyes.

Rinoa politely turned her back and started studying something on the floor that was suddenly very interesting.

Seifer kissed me again, softer this time. When he pulled back, he said, "I made you a promise, remember?"

I nodded. I looked away from him, hating myself for feeling so indecisive now about continuing forward. It had to be done, and I had to do it. I had never hesitated Before, so why was I hesitating now? Because I didn't want to disappear, which was a very real possibility. Because I didn't want to lose Seifer. Because I didn't want to lose Rinoa or any of my other friends. Because I liked my life as it was now. I didn't want to lose any of it. Going forward wasn't only putting my friends at risk, but myself as well. As I'd told Seifer before, I didn't belong to this timeline either. The body might be mine, but not the memories.

I didn't belong here, just like Ultimecia didn't belong here. The only difference was that she didn't know anything more than one fact: that a SeeD was destined to kill her. And that SeeD was me.

I knew Seifer was watching me, studying me with that deep green gaze of his, reading my thoughts from my face and body as easily as if I had spoken them aloud. I looked up at him. "Sorry." I said at last.

He smiled. "Hyne, Squall, I'd be having second-thoughts too, if I were in your shoes. It's only human."

I nodded. "But we're this far. Might as well go all the way."

"Might as well, right?"

There was laughter in his voice, which annoyed me a little because it made me smile a little bit as well. I didn't want to smile right now, not when everything was riding on what we had to do once we made it through the maze of Ultimecia's castle. I looked at him, then Rinoa, and tilted my head. They fell into step beside me and we headed through the castle, heading toward where the first monster in Ultimecia's employ, Sphinxara, rested. Before we took any steps further into the room, though, I made sure Seifer and Rinoa had junctioned enough magic to themselves to be able to nullify or absorb most of, if not all of, the attacks from the monsters we might face. Since we didn't have any of our abilities currently, the fights we would face could very well mean the death of us. I knew I would survive anything any monster threw at me; I wasn't sure Seifer and Rinoa would fare all that well, considering we didn't have anything that could be used to defend ourselves. I wouldn't know what abilities the others chose to unlock until they defeated Sphinxara and Tri-Point.

I hoped they would unlock the GFs, and put my mind at ease. Unfortunately, they chose to unlock our resurrection ability first and the magic ability second. I suppose from a logical viewpoint (which Quistis was no doubt responsible for) having the ability to bring someone back from the dead and then heal them was far more beneficial than having the Guardian Forces readily available. When I felt those two abilities return to me, I knew it was almost our turn. I led my team back to the main room and prepared myself to cross the light fixture, hoping to Hyne it wouldn't fall when I stepped on it.

The whole time, I kept watching Seifer's face, looking for a sign that he was starting to falter under Ultimecia's influence. But Seifer remained as cocky as ever. Either Ultimecia wasn't seeking a way into Seifer's mind, or he was somehow keeping her at bay with, or without, Rinoa's help. I knew he wouldn't say a word to me about it, even if he was under attack, and he knew I was watching him. I looked away from him at one point, hating that I was so worried about him. Seifer was strong; I needed to trust him. I couldn't babysit him all the time through this place. If I fought distracted, there was a good chance I'd get us all killed.

We continued through the castle, taking out the third monster, Krysta, and this time unlocked our limit break ability. I knew Seifer was delaying the activation of the Guardian Forces just to get under my skin, knowing full well I was getting annoyed with him. He just kept giving me cocky grins, and I ignored him in turn. If he wanted to tempt fate, I decided I would let him. He could be a big idiot for all I cared now. I just didn't want him putting myself or Rinoa at risk if he faltered.

Of course, he could be right. Ultimecia had gotten what she wanted. All she was waiting for was for us to reach her so she could kill us. I let out a silent sigh and rubbed at the bridge of my nose, feeling the pucker of my scar even under my gloves. _Calm down. Just calm down. You're focusing your nervousness on something inconsequential, something that you'll be able to change, given that we kill all the monsters in here. What you're actually worried about is what's going to happen when you reach Ultimecia and what happens when you kill her. If you kill her._ I closed my eyes tight for a brief moment.

Then we entered the painting room.

I remembered this room all too clearly. I knew there were twelve paintings, each with an image and a corresponding name. Only three of the paintings would have the correct names that would make up the password. The idea was to choose three of the words and input them in a much larger painting on the second floor, which would trigger a battle and unlock another of our abilities.

Seifer let out a low whistle. "Someone's been busy. Who do you think painted all these?"

"Ultimecia?" Rinoa guessed.

"Doubt it. She doesn't strike me as the creative type."

"The point is," I said, "someone took the time to paint all these. They made them for a purpose."

They both looked at me, somewhat confused and impressed at the same time. "What for?" asked Rinoa.

"Hey, even Leonhart can't know everything." Seifer told her, a knowing grin upon his face. I wanted to punch him, because I knew he was making fun of me.

Instead, I shook my head and pushed past them, heading for the first of the paintings on the ground floor. I pointed at the first painting, _Ignus_ , and said, "Each word corresponds to the picture shown. Fire is ignus. There are twelve just like it, depicting different scenes and different words."

"It's a puzzle!" Rinoa said suddenly. She grinned at my surprised expression and looked back and forth from Seifer to me. "It's a word puzzle. We have to figure out the riddle and find the right password to be able to continue."

I blinked. Rinoa hadn't been with me Before when I solved this puzzle. I had sent her with Irvine and Quistis, and kept Selphie and Zell with me. Before, those two had puzzled over each painting while I had explored the room, at last finding the only clue that had helped us figure out the three words that were the password.

Seifer laughed. "Sounds easy enough!" He pointed to the second painting, _Inandantia_. "Let's try and figure out what the password is."

He and Rinoa set about exploring the downstairs for more paintings. I took a deep breath and headed up the stairs, running my fingers up the banister as I did. I stopped before the giant painting on the second floor and studied the picture. Was it irony that the password was what it was? Or had someone made this painting, the password, knowing what was to come? 'In the Garden Sleeps the Messenger'. I was the messenger, raised in Balamb Garden, for the sole purpose of destroying sorceresses like Ultimecia. One could argue I had been raised as a SeeD for the sole purpose of destroying Ultimecia herself, rather than any given sorceress.

"Here you are."

I half turned to watch Seifer approach. Rinoa was down the other side of the hallway, studying one of the other paintings. There was no smile on Seifer's face, no cocky quirk of his lips. Even his eyes were like hard chips of emerald. I lifted my shoulder and gave him my back.

He came to stand beside me. "This one's nice. This the one we have to input the password into?"

I nodded.

"Rinoa will be up in a second. She's getting the last few words."

I took a deep breath and said softly, "Vividarium et intervigilium et viator."

Seifer looked at me, one brow raised. "In English, maybe?"

"In the Garden Sleeps the Messenger. Vividarium et intervigilium et viator."

He looked at me more fully, studying me for some time, before he turned back to the painting and cursed. "That's the password, isn't it?"

I didn't move, other than to blink.

"What does it mean?"

"Beside the password?"

"Yeah."

I shrugged. I didn't want to give voice to the thoughts I'd had before. Even if I did, they wouldn't do me any good, anyway, other than to stir up things I didn't need stirred up.

Seifer, however, had gotten too good at reading me. I saw his eyes narrow, but for once, he didn't push me into answering, nor did he answer for me. Instead, he reached out and input the three words in the correct order. When he finished, there was a noise down below us, and Rinoa let out a little breathy shriek. From her vantage point, she could likely see Trauma. I pushed past Seifer with enough force to let him know I didn't want to talk to him about whatever I was feeling, unsheathed Lion Heart, gestured sharply to Rinoa, and headed down the stairs. Rinoa quickly caught up to me before Seifer did, though he was right behind us as we hit the landing. I engaged Trauma with everything I had to give, relying on everything the others had unlocked for us to bring it down. Seifer and I ducked in and around each other, our gunblades striking like lightning. Rinoa supported us with healing magic, mending our wounds when we needed them mended.

Trauma fell only minutes later.

Then, without stopping, we headed to the next challenge. I snatched the prison key and initiated the battle against the Red Giant. To make the battle easier, I used the first few minutes of the battle to cast the Meltdown spell, then attacked with Seifer. Since we didn't have our GFs still - Seifer insisted on unlocking our limit breaks first - I didn't have Doomtrain to inflict the Darkness status on the Red Giant, so Seifer and I were relying on Rinoa to keep us healed. She did a good job, casting her healing spells only when I or Seifer needed it and attacking otherwise, helping us whittle the monster's health down until it finally fell over.

When we left the prison and reached the point where we could go no further, I moved toward the glowing platform that would allow me to contact the others and give them the go-ahead. There was nothing left for Rinoa, Seifer, and I to do but wait. The silence we kept felt oppressive. I wanted to move, to pace, but I didn't dare. Such movement wouldn't do any good, anyway. The others would get done when they got done.

Seifer leaned against the wall near me with his arms folded over his chest. "Was it this boring?" he asked me.

I saw Rinoa give him a confused look, but when she looked at me, I pointedly ignored her gaze by focusing on the stones at my feet. "It's the rules of the castle. We can't do anything until we open the path. This is the only way to do it."

"It's boring."

"That's your opinion."

Seifer smirked. Then he looked at Rinoa. "What do you think, princess? Don't you want to see some action?"

Rinoa narrowed her eyes a little at Seifer. "I like this down time just fine, thank you. You're being really cavalier, you know. Can't you see how much Squall is worried about you?"

"I know he's worried about me." Seifer said, his voice holding a hint of a growl. "But it doesn't change anything. Him worrying about me, about what may or may not happen, it doesn't do anything except make him vulnerable."

Rinoa scoffed. "Did you just use Squall and vulnerable in the same sentence?"

"I'm human, too, Rinoa." I said softly. I flicked my gaze toward Seifer. "Anyone can be vulnerable when it comes to something, or someone, they care about."

Seifer's cheeks colored slightly. Rinoa didn't notice. "Squall, don't say nice things." she said, waving her hand dismissively. "It'll go straight to Seifer's head."

I smiled slightly, still watching Seifer. He only made a noise in the back of his throat, and crossed his arms over his chest, leaning back against the wall and scowling at the floor.


	36. Chapter 36

Thirty-Six - Seifer POV

We got moving again a little while later, this time heading back down to the prison cells to pick up another key. Squall had a faintly amused smile on his face as he picked it up out of the water, so it wasn't hard to figure out how it got down here. He led us to the next door, and the next fight. This one was the hardest we had faced by far, but Squall continued to handle it with expert grace. He cast the Meltdown spell, since I still refused to let him have the Guardian Forces back, and launched into the first attack on the beast. I backed him up, with Rinoa supporting us, but just when I thought the battle was over, the second phase began. It was a difficult fight, even with a majority of our abilities unlocked. When the Gargantua finally expired, I saw Squall crouch down with his head bowed, his chest heaving as he fought for breath. He wasn't looking at me. He was allowing me to choose which of our remaining abilities we took. The choice was simple - draw or the demons. Eventually, I'd have to have Carbuncle back in my head, but I was enjoying the solitary nature of my own thoughts.

I was enjoying the ability to be able to think without having someone make a comment on them. I couldn't understand how Squall could deal with it, especially since he kept the more powerful demons in his mind. What was it like living with Shiva? Did she favor the Ice Prince and therefore left him alone? Or was she partly to blame for his icy personality?

I frowned as I considered that line of thought. I guess if Squall was Shiva, then I was a perfect match with Ifrit. We were perfect opposites, just as Shiva and Ifrit were. Maybe that was why, some times, we got along just fine, and other times we got on each other's nerves.

I wondered then if it wasn't just me Squall was worried about, as far as the GFs went, but the fight with Ultimecia as well. He never told me how he had beat her the first time, only that he had, and then he'd ended up wandering around this wasteland within the Time Compression until he'd ended up back at the beginning. I wasn't sure if it was because he'd forgotten how he'd fought and defeated Ultimecia, or if he wasn't sure that the same tactics would work the same way now. I thought about asking him, but I doubted he'd tell me. I knew how Squall worked. He'd told me everything because I didn't leave him much of a choice. I knew he hadn't given me all the details, mostly on the things he didn't think were important or the things he didn't want me to inadvertently change, and I couldn't really blame him for that.

I couldn't blame him for wanting to protect me.

I couldn't blame him for fighting to ensure my safety.

But, I guess I kinda did.

The way he watched me sometimes grated on my nerves. It made me feel like he thought I was somehow less. That I couldn't fight Ultimecia off if she decided to invade my head again, without the protection of Carbuncle. I mean, when she tried before, I'd nearly been driven to my knees trying to withstand her while Carbuncle fought his furry little ass off. If I hadn't had him then, I doubted I'd have been able to survive it.

Unbidden I remembered the words he'd uttered back in the portrait room - In the Garden Sleeps the Messenger - and focused on the memory of his expression as he'd said it. Those words bothered him. There was a message in them, one he hadn't liked. I liked to think I spoke Squall-ese, but sometimes I couldn't figure out what he was thinking, even if the emotions were plain on his face or in his eyes. We were getting closer to the end, and we all were getting tenser.

I chose to unlock the GFs, figuring I'd get an answer one way or another.

I felt them return to me like whispers in my ear. Ifrit, Carbuncle, Diablos, they all returned to me, although I couldn't feel Carbuncle's protective shield around my mind anymore. I looked at Squall and found him smiling gently, his gaze unfocused. He was probably talking to the demons that he'd junctioned with, although how he could smile like _that_ with _them_ , I didn't know. Then he glanced at me, and his eyes darkened slightly.

"Yeah," I said, waving my hand toward my head, "they're back."

 _Oh, it was awful._ Carbuncle said, his little furry butt bouncing around inside my head. _All we were able to do was watch. It was terrible!_

 _Yeah,_ agreed Ifrit, though his tone was far more sarcastic, _completely terrible. For once we get to relax and just watch everything happen without having to lift a finger to help. It was almost like a vacation!_

Carbuncle bounced and turned to glower at Ifrit. _I had a_ job _to do. Unlike someone else._

I somehow stopped myself from snickering. Ifrit's expression became affronted and a growl escaped the fire GF. I swear, Ifrit would've strangled Carbuncle if he thought he could reach him before Diablos got in between. I saw him glance toward the bat-like GF, gauging the distance, then decided to apparently let it go, though he pointed a claw at Carbuncle and said, _If you weren't so useful, fuzzball, I'd tear you limb from limb._

Carbuncle stuck his little pink tongue out at Ifrit and quickly got out of reach. Then he looked at me. _I'm sorry Seifer. I can't put shields up around your mind anymore._

 _Don't worry about it._ I replied. I glanced at Squall, noticing how he wasn't looking at me anymore. His gaze seemed distant, and I realized he was probably still talking to his own demons. _Whatever's gonna happen is gonna happen. You did a good job._

Carbuncle preened at my praise and twitched his tail back and forth. He gave a smug look to Ifrit, who only rolled his eyes and pointedly turned his back to the little green fuzzball. I drew my attention away from them and focused on Squall, who seemed to be coming out of his own dazed state. His stormy eyes flicked toward me, but whatever question he wanted to ask me he apparently decided wasn't worth putting into voice. I was pretty sure he knew there was nothing Carbuncle could do now for me; Squall's force-junction hadn't put Carbuncle under my control. Rather, he'd remained under Squall's command, just living in my mind and forming shields around it so Ultimecia couldn't control me. Now Carbuncle was naturally junctioned to me, and his reflect shields would only protect us from magical attacks. I was on my own if Ultimecia decided to toy with my thoughts.

I glanced at Rinoa. Well. Maybe not _totally_ alone.

Of course, I hoped Ultimecia was too caught up in her victory to think about trying to turn me against Squall again. I hoped Rinoa wouldn't have to put her sorceress skills to the test in order to keep me as one of her knights.

"Come on." Squall said. He started moving, and Rinoa and I fell into step behind him. We crossed through the castle, heading down hallways and through rooms, and fighting little things that came out of the woodwork to try and eat our faces. I noticed that Squall was starting to hold back during the fights, conserving his strength for when he'd need it the most. For him to start doing that meant only one thing: we were getting close to the end.

We met back up with the others in a beautiful courtyard filled with an empty fountain. They looked a little worse for the wear, so Squall allowed us to take a few minutes to rest and heal. He stood off by himself, his head tilted back, staring up toward a giant clocktower. I couldn't see his face, so I couldn't read his expression, but I knew from the tenseness of his body that in just a few moments, we would be facing the sorceress who wanted to kill us all and have the world all to herself.

I approached Squall, purposefully letting my footsteps make noise to let him know I was coming. I saw him release the necklace he wore around his throat and drop his hand to his side before he turned to face me. His expression was carefully neutral. I glanced at his Griever pendant, then back at his face.

"Worried?" I asked.

He shook his head.

"You're a bad liar, Leonhart."

He glowered at me.

I turned my gaze up toward the clocktower. "She's up there, huh?"

"Yeah."

"It's almost over, huh?"

"Yeah."

"What's the first thing you want to do when we get back?"

Squall's lips twitched. "Vacation."

I grinned. "Yeah, me too. We could pick up where we left off on the beach."

His cheeks colored slightly and he looked away from me, despite the slight smile that curled the edges of his lips. "I'd like that."

I came closer to him until I was standing right beside him. "Only we won't do it in the secret place. Hyne knows someone's bound to walk in on us there. Where would you like to go? You've been all over the damn world. Where was your favorite spot?"

Squall was silent for a while. His head tilted to one side in thought, and a small smile appeared on his face. He shrugged. "Nowhere in particular."

"Oh, come on, Ice Prince. There's gotta be somewhere."

His smile became a little softer. "Winhill." he said at last.

I blinked, instantly caught off guard. I'd been expecting somewhere more exotic, not some backwater village. But it meant something to him. I could tell by the expression on his face. "Winhill, huh?"

Squall looked away from me, back to the clocktower. "Yeah." For a while, he was silent. Then he asked, "Where would you want to go?"

The question took me aback for a minute. I hadn't really thought about where I'd wanted to go on vacation considering, you know, mercenaries never got vacations. Sure, I had a few places where I went when I couldn't handle life and needed to get away for a while, but none of them were important enough to me to want to share with Squall. "I don't know. Somewhere with a lot of sun. Or maybe somewhere like a town caught on the edge of twilight."

"Didn't take you for much of a romantic."

His tone was teasing, just on the edge of loving. I grinned. He'd indulge me, I was sure, if I asked him to. Squall met my eyes, his blue-grey gaze sparkling with held-back laughter. That made me feel good. I grinned wider. "I can be a romantic if I want to be. Have I ever told you about my romantic dream?"

The sparkle went out of his eyes. "Yeah. You did once."

 _Shit._ "Not _that_ romantic dream. I'll have you know I have a new one."

Now he looked at me curiously. I wanted to take him into my arms and hold him close, whisper it into his ear and feel for myself how he reacted to what I had to say. Except we had an audience, so I settled for saying, "It involves you. Without leather."

He blinked, honestly surprised. He glanced down at himself, then glanced back up at me. His head tilted to one side, and I wondered what he was doing, considering his stormy eyes had a strange glint to them.

Then his gaze shifted to over my shoulder. "It's time, everyone."

The deliverance of his words made something inside me tense. There were groans and mutters of indignancy behind me, but the others got to their feet, readied their weapons, and started after Squall as he led the way out of the courtyard and up the clocktower.

We emerged onto a long walkway, with only a single door at the end. The air felt oppressive. There was something malignant behind that door. A familiar weight pressed against my mind, but this time it wasn't seeking a way to control me. I could tell that Squall felt it as well. He only gripped Lion Heart tighter and started forward. I realized that it was the feel of an unbound sorceress, a sorceress without a knight to ground her, to keep her on the side of good. It was the feel of a sorceress who had given herself over to madness, a madness borne of fear and loneliness and anger and hate. It was oppressive and slimy and rotten, a complete contrast from the feeling I got from Rinoa. Her presence felt like a warm summer breeze, full of life and promise. She stepped between Squall and I, so that we flanked her. Behind us, the others spread out, followers to the leaders.

Squall inhaled and let it out slowly. "This is it... Ultimecia is here. Ready?"

"Yeah." I answered, gripping Hyperion with all the confidence I could muster.

"I'm ready." Rinoa answered.

"Same." Selphie said.

Irvine tipped his hat. "Let's get this show on the road."

Quistis said, "Let's finish this so we can go home."

Zell punched his left fist into his right palm. "I'm ready to pay this bitch back for everything she's done to us."

Squall nodded. Then he led the way across the path to the door. He set his hand against the door and pushed.


	37. Chapter 37

Thirty-Seven - Squall POV

It was just as I remembered. Ultimecia's throne room, designed to her liking. She was sitting upon her throne, regal as a queen. Her golden gaze focused on each of us in turn, her face changing in expression as her anger and ire began to rear their ugly heads. Her lips curled, showing her teeth. Her nails scraped along the armrests of her throne, her fingers curling into taut claws.

"...SeeD... SeeD... SeeD... SeeD, SeeD, Seed!" Ultimecia shrieked, her voice cracking with her anger. "Kurse all SeeDs. Swarming like lokusts akross generations. You disgust me. The world was on the brink of that ever-elusive 'time kompression'. Insolent fools! Your vain krusade ends here, SeeDs. The price for your meddling is death beyond death. I shall send you to a dimension beyond your imagining. There, I will reign, and you will be my slaves for eternity." She burst into laughter, leaning back in her throne so far that the tips of her breasts were visible against the fabric of her dress.

"Get ready." I said, hoping the others had prepared themselves. "Our parties and formations no longer matter. She gets to choose who she fights."

"What?" Seifer said, the word echoed by the others.

"That's not fair!" Selphie protested.

I shrugged my shoulder. "That's how it is. Give it everything you got."

"Any other advice you wanna give us, Ice Prince?" Seifer growled, lifting Hyperion in a clearly threatening gesture.

"Don't worry about dying." I said as softly as I could. I wasn't sure if the others heard, but Seifer certainly did. He glowered at me. I wanted to explain, but I didn't bother. He'd understand soon, anyway.

Then Ultimecia raised her hand, a long finger pointing down toward us. "Whom shall I exterminate first!? I'll start with you three!"

The first time I had fought Ultimecia, I had been in the fight from the start, along with Selphie and Rinoa. I'd given them quick orders, mostly to use the Aura spell on me and keep each other and myself alive while attacking with magic, physical attacks, and Guardian Forces. I'd learned - quickly - that it was foolish to use any Guardian Force, as Ultimecia seemed to sense their presence and specifically targeted them. That was Before. Now I knew. I hadn't bothered to divide the Guardian Forces among anyone else except for me and Seifer. I hadn't bothered to tell anyone that I was basically going to sacrifice them in order to be the last one standing with Ultimecia. I had definitely deliberately not told Seifer about my plan. I didn't want him trying to protect me.

Like the first time, I was the first to face Ultimecia. Beside me was Quistis and Irvine. I was glad that I had Aura spells left over from Before, and cast one upon myself. With the power of Renzokuken, I spent most the time trying to trigger Lion Heart in order to push her from this form to her second form. I left the decisions of healing to Quistis and Irvine, worrying about myself only when I felt exhaustion and the shadowy touch of death creeping upon me or when Aura's duration terminated. Ultimecia's first form wasn't all that difficult to defeat, and the three of us came away from that battle relatively unscathed.

Then came the part I was dreading the most.

Ultimecia began to float in the air, shimmering with spiritual energy. She shrieked in rage. "The post powerful GF... ...You shall... SUFFER...!" She burst into laughter.

Griever struck down Irvine before the sharpshooter had a chance to defend himself, before I had a chance to act. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw his body flicker as it was sucked back into its proper place in time. I knew he would be okay; everyone who died here would be returned to their normal time alive and well. Quistis didn't know that. She unleashed every bit of blue magic she had upon Griever, her anger giving her more strength than usual. Zell took Irvine's place, looking shocked at suddenly finding himself in battle but adapting well.

"The GF's true power... To show you...! Griever! Make them bleed!" Ultimecia shrieked.

Born of my own mind, of my own making, and stolen by Ultimecia to fight for her, Griever was tougher than Ultimecia. He was stronger than any GF I had in my possession, outside of Eden. But I wasn't ready to summon Eden yet. I knew if I did, Ultimecia would likely target me and take Eden out before it ever had a chance to come into existence to attack. I needed Eden as much as I needed the Aura spells I was using to exhaustion. Quistis fell next, replaced by Selphie, who quickly cast haste upon us and fell into the role of healer.

As much as I wanted to try and take Griever back from Ultimecia, I knew there was no way I could control him, not with her twisting his mind. Eden had counseled me against such an action down in the courtyard. The act would sooner destroy me than do any good.

 _In all likelihood,_ the great ship had said, _Griever would run wild and destroy all of you. Guardian Forces are just that, young one - spiritual forces designed to protect their summoners. Forcibly steal us away from our masters, whether wanted or unwanted, and you could find yourself a victim of our powers. And a Guardian Force like Griever, stolen and corrupted and tortured..._ Eden fell silent for a minute. _A Guardian Force like that is dangerous and unpredictable._

I bared my teeth and took Griever from Ultimecia in another way - I destroyed him. Even still, I knew that would do nothing, for Ultimecia only took Griever's broken body into her arms, looking upon the GF like she was actually sorry for him. Her burning gold eyes turned on us, focused on me, and her lips split into a psychotic grin.

"I shall junction myself... unto Griever!"

Her body shimmered as she pulled Griever's broken form closer to hers. They melded together, with Ultimecia taking on many of Griever's attributes. When they stopped shifting and became a solid entity, I felt a cold shiver run down my spine. I remembered this form well. It had given us some trouble the first time; I'd had Zell try to summon Eden that time, and she had immediately targeted him. I had lost Eden before I ever had a chance to use the great ship. This time, though, _I_ had Eden, and I fell back in order to summon the Guardian Force. During that time, I was useless, practically at a standstill while Selphie and Zell gave everything they had to bring her down. When Ultimecia looked at me, I knew she was preparing herself to attack.

Eden came first.

The great ship materialized out of nowhere, answering my call. I put every bit of power I could into Eden, powering up its attack as far as I could. Strike after strike, Eden hit Ultimecia, driving her backwards and down with the barrage of light. Ultimecia couldn't stop the attacks; she took the brunt of the damage, but still didn't fall.

Instead, she got revenge by killing Zell and after I counterattacked with a Renzokuken, she killed Selphie.

For an entire heart-stopping minute, I was alone.

Then Rinoa appeared, her radiant healing spells filling me with strength and energy. Seifer wasn't far behind, his heavy-handed strikes driving Ultimecia back even more. She let out a terrifying, blood-curdling scream and vanished.

I somehow stayed upright. Rinoa gripped my arm, looking at me with worried honey-colored eyes. I focused on Seifer. "You _would_ be able to just show up and take her out with one hit." I whispered.

The edges of Seifer's lips twitched, but he didn't smile. "You did a lot of the work. I don't know whether to feel jealous or pleased."

"It's not over."

"Yeah, I figured." Seifer swung Hyperion up to his shoulder. "It's time to break out all the stops, princess. You ready?"

Rinoa released me and stood tall beside me. Her hands clenched and shook slightly, but she held her head high. "I'm ready."

As if Rinoa's words were the exact spell to summon her, Ultimecia appeared as the world went black around us. She was in her final form, her true form. Just like Before, if we fell here, Ultimecia would win. Time Compression would destroy everything. I wouldn't allow that. I had beaten her once, and I was sure I could do it again. This time, I had Rinoa and Seifer by my side. I still had Eden and the other Guardian Forces. Unless something unforseen happened, there was no way we could lose.

Ultimecia spread her arms wide. "I am Ultimecia." she said, her voice echoing from all angles. "Time shall compress... All existence denied."

"Shut up." Seifer growled, launching into the first of his attacks. Hyperion howled through the air as it sought to cut into the sorceress' flesh. When she focused on him, I realized that she recognized him. She knew who Seifer was.

Her lips split into a wide, cruel smile, but no words came out. I saw Hyperion flicker out of the corner of my eye and Seifer suddenly went down on one knee, his gunblade buried in the darkness at our feet. His green eyes burned bright as he glared up at her, his teeth bared in a vicious snarl. Whatever was happening, it was only happening inside his head. There was nothing Rinoa or I could do for him; he was on his own, with the only help being the Guardian Forces I gave him. But there was still something I could do while he was raging his internal battle with the sorceress that had sought to ruin him.

"Rinoa." I said softly, gaining her attention. "Stay here and keep an eye on Seifer. He's going to need you."

"Be careful, Squall." Rinoa said, quickly crossing behind me to Seifer, where she put her hands on his shoulders. I saw him relax slightly, and then Rinoa's eyes became bright gold, her brows furrowing together as she stared up at Ultimecia.

Knowing that neither of them could hear me, I didn't bother to say what I wanted to. It wouldn't matter, anyway. I readied Lion Heart, recast Aura on myself, and launched into Renzokuken. Lion Heart took chunk after chunk out of Ultimecia, spattering the darkness with her blood and flesh. I saw her face contort with pain; she could feel everything I was doing to her body, but because she was locked in mental combat with Seifer and Rinoa, there wasn't anything she could do about it. She would have to break from Seifer to face me. Evidently, she was thinking along the same lines, for Rinoa suddenly let out a shriek and collapsed beside Seifer, who had collapsed to his hands and knees and was panting harshly.

I spared them a glance, and it cost me.

Ultimecia's attack hit me full on, sending me flying backwards. I hit the ground on my shoulders, tumbled heels over head, and came to rest beside Seifer and Rinoa. I cursed, feeling every fiber of my body protesting my cruel treatment of it. I struggled upright, casting Curaga on myself. Rinoa was pushing herself up as well, blood streaming down her chin from where she'd bitten her lip. Using her back of her hand, she wiped it away, then got to her feet and cast several healing spells in quick succession on both myself and Seifer.

"Fuck," Seifer breathed, shoving himself upright. "She killed them. That bitch... fucking... killed them."

I closed my eyes, feeling a flash of pain. Ifrit, Cerberus, Diablos, and Carbuncle, all gone. They had given everything they had to protect Seifer's mind from Ultimecia's influence, and they had paid the ultimate price. I inhaled deeply.

"Yeah, I got it, Leonhart," Seifer growled. "Use everything you got. We won't need it after this."

I opened my eyes, staring up at Ultimecia. "Distract her."

Seifer didn't answer me. He simply charged forward, Hyperion swinging. Behind me, Rinoa drew upon her powers as a sorceress, which granted her an inexhaustible supply of magic. Spell after spell, from offensive to defensive to healing, she flung at both Ultimecia and Seifer. I used the time they bought me to first summon Shiva. The goddess of ice gave everything she had into her attack, her anger and sorrow at the loss of her friends giving her attack more bite. I summoned Siren, Doomtrain, Bahamut, the Brothers, Cactuar, Tonberry, Quetzacoatl, Leviathan, Pandemonia, and Alexander. I lost them all when Ultimecia counterattacked, destroying each one when I tried to summon them a second time.

Seifer retreated from Ultimecia's latest attack, panting hard. Rinoa also looked exhausted. I only had Eden left, a handful of Aura spells, and my own strength. It had been Aura and my own determination that had ended Ultimecia Before, and it was starting to look like it would end up being the same now.

I summoned Eden.

I didn't wait for Seifer to recover. I didn't wait for Rinoa's healing spells. Eden's final attack opened up an opportunity for me. I had to end it now. If I didn't, I knew Ultimecia would kill Rinoa and Seifer and I would face her alone. I drew upon everything I had - my friendship and bond with the others, my bond to Rinoa, whom I thought of as a beloved sister, my love for Ellone, who _was_ my beloved sister, and my deep love for Seifer, for whom I had relived this entire madness for, in order to protect him.

The Aura spell triggered my Renzokuken and unleashed Lion Heart upon Ultimecia. Each strike dealt massive damage, to the point that there would be no recovery. Blood spurted from Ultimecia's wounds, her voice turned shrill as she screamed, but I refused to stop. I pounded away at her until I had nothing left to give to the attack. I dropped to the ground, stumbled backwards, and then found myself braced against Seifer. He gripped my wrist, allowing me to keep a tight hold on my gunblade. His eyes were narrowed as he glared up at Ultimecia, but he didn't say a word. He didn't really need to. Ultimecia swayed to the left and right, her chest heaving as she struggled to draw air into her lungs. She reached for us, or tried to, but her arm never seemed to raise high enough.

There was fear in Ultimecia's eyes when she focused on us. She had been so certain of her victory that she hadn't thought to be scared. She hadn't thought that she would lose. I almost felt pity for her, but just almost. Perhaps it had been the way I'd been raised, but when you committed yourself to a battle, you gave it everything you had. You fought not for victory, but to survive. You don't want to die, so you fight to live. Victory, or defeat, is just a by-product of the battle.

She knew now that it was the end. There was nothing she could do now to recover from this fight. Even if she managed to turn Seifer to her side - which was impossible now, I was certain, because of Rinoa - there would be no way she could win. She didn't want to die.

I didn't want to die either.

I shook off Seifer's hand, gripped Lion Heart tighter, and cast my second to last Aura spell upon myself. Then I turned to Seifer, and cast my final Aura upon him.

"Come back to me." Rinoa said suddenly. We both looked at her, Knights regarding our Sorceress. "Come back to me. Come back alive. I'll be waiting, so, you better come find me. I won't forgive you if you don't."

Ultimecia finally managed to get her hands up high enough to focus her final attack upon us. Seifer grinned at Rinoa and gave her a mocking bow. "Don't worry, princess. We'll be back."

I said nothing, just allowing myself to smile gently at her. Then I turned and broke into a flat run, Seifer right behind me. I launched into a Renzokuken, Seifer attacked with his Fire Cross limit break, going straight into Bloodfest because of the Aura spell I had cast upon him. Ultimecia could do nothing against us as we combined our strength and tore away at her with our gunblades.

It was strange, because now, in the heat of battle, I noticed things that I hadn't Before. Ultimecia was crying. Tears were streaming down her face. Her lips moved, but she made no sound, other than to rasp for breath, but I could make out what she was trying to say. She was trying to beg for her life, trying to convince us to stop, to let her live. As much as a part of me wanted to show her mercy, I knew I couldn't.

Lion Heart bit into the flesh just under her collarbone and tore an elegant, bloody line from right to left. Hyperion caught her in the throat. Just before the Aura spell ran out on both of us, Ultimecia collapsed.

I landed lightly on my feet, panting hard. Seifer landed beside me, still holding Hyperion at the ready. When Ultimecia didn't move, Seifer lowered his weapon and let out the breath he'd been holding.

Seifer turned to regard me. "Did we-"

The room exploded into blank white.


	38. Chapter 38

Thirty-Eight - Seifer POV

I threw up my arm to shield my eyes from the bright white light that suddenly exploded out of the darkness, a string of curses escaping me. When the light faded, I lowered my arm, and found myself in a pure white room. I wasn't alone; everyone was there. Everyone, except Squall.

I spun around, trying to find him. My heard pounded in my chest, and an almost painful feeling came over me. Squall was gone. He'd been right beside me and he was gone! His words came back to me - _I don't belong to this time. What if I disappear at the end?_ \- and my chest tightened with incredible pain. Irvine ran past me, then Selphie, Zell, and Quistis. Their voices filled the empty space, echoing together. I didn't listen.

I wanted to yell out for Squall, but I was sure he couldn't hear me. I didn't know where to begin looking either, in this white void. What if he really _had_ been sent back to his own timeline? Or worse, what if he had died? What if time hadn't allowed for Squall to survive after we beat Ultimecia? Or what if he _had_ survived, but had lost all the memories we'd made over these long weeks? What if he didn't remember me? What if he didn't remember the promise we'd made?

I stopped panicking.

My fist clenched. Our promise. The promise we'd made each other, specifically for this situation. First, we had to escape the Time Compression and make it back to our proper time. I closed my eyes and thought about Balamb Garden. I pictured the training grounds, and the secret place. That was where we were going to meet after we'd finished this. If anything, that's where Squall would be waiting for me. And if he didn't show, he and I were going to have words when I found him. I hadn't gone through all this bullshit, hadn't had Guardian Forces sacrifice themselves to protect me, hadn't decided I could love Squall, just to have him taken away from me.

Somewhere in the distance, I heard Rinoa's voice. She was calling out for Squall, for me. I didn't answer her. Somehow, I felt that if I _did_ answer her, I would lose my chance of ever meeting Squall. I forced my body to relax and closed my eyes. I focused an image in my mind of the secret place in Balamb Garden's training center. I tried to make it as real and as lifelike as I could, as if I was standing right there, right now. I imagined I could smell the scents of the plants and animals kept there, that I could hear the noises of the training center. I imagined that, when I opened my eyes, Squall would be standing there beside me.

I didn't feel anything different. I didn't feel my body shift from the nothingness where I stood to the training center. The sounds and smells I imagined became more pungent, became more tactile. When I opened my eyes, I found myself standing in the secret place, overlooking the nighttime sea. The smell of the ocean made my nose sting a little, and the sound of the surf crashing against the hull of Garden seemed far too loud. I was also alone.

"Squall?" I called, not daring to let my voice get too loud. I wasn't sure if there were any other people around, and I didn't want word getting back that I was crying out for my rival. I didn't hear anyone, and I didn't hear a response.

 _Squall, you bastard. You better not be dead. You better not have disappeared!_ I swept out of the secret place and into the training center, but I heard nothing out of the ordinary. No footsteps on the ground. No sounds of a gunblade. No sounds of extra belts and leather. I couldn't even feel his presence.

I gave in.

"Squall! _Squall!_ "

Nothing. Silence, except for the chatter of a bird.

My stomach twisted. I felt sick. My chest tightened and it was hard for me to breathe. Where was he? Had he really been consumed by the Time Compression and sent back to where he actually belonged? Was I going to come across a different Squall? Was I going to come across him at all? Was he going to be stuck in that place, that wasteland, forever now?

My eyes burned. I wasn't going to give up. I _couldn't_ give up. We'd made a promise to each other, and Squall always kept his word. I ought to wait right here for him; this is where we said we would meet. If I wasn't here, and he showed up, what would he think? Would he have the same thoughts I'd had? That I was dead, consumed by the Time Compression? I scrubbed my face with my palms. Who would've thought that I'd miss Ifrit's commentary? The GF had sacrificed himself for me, when Ultimecia had attacked my mind. Ifrit, Cerberus, Diablos, and Carbuncle had fought Ultimecia within the battlefield of my thoughts, and had fallen one by one. The only one that had held on to the very last minute had been Ifrit, but he had at last fallen, just after Rinoa had joined the battle. Then it had been sorceress against sorceress, with Ultimecia whispering evil sweet nothings to me and Rinoa demanding me to remember my feelings for Squall, and how real they were. That what he and I shared now was far more real and far more precious than anything Ultimecia could promise me.

As hard as it was for me, I turned on my heel and returned to the secret place. I leaned against the wall, arms folded one on top of the other. My nails dug into my arms through my coat, the little pricks of pain somehow keeping me rooted to my spot.

We'd won. We'd defeated Ultimecia and the Time Compression had fizzled out, which allowed us to return to our proper places in time. I wondered where the others had ended up. I wondered if they had all appeared at Edea's orphanage like they had planned, and I wondered what they were thinking when Rinoa, Squall, and I didn't show up. Were they worried about us? Where had Rinoa ended up? Had Squall stayed behind in order to make sure Rinoa made it safely out of the Time Compression? He was like that, I mused with a slight smile. He sacrificed his own wants and needs to make sure someone else stayed safe, whole, and healthy.

"I hate waiting." I said to the cool night air. "Especially waiting by myself."

There was no answer, save for the splashing waves and the occasional call of an animal or bird. My patience was starting to run thin by the fifth or sixth hour. I was sitting now, my back to the wall so I could stare down the short hall that led from the training ground to the secret place. No one had come by. Not even a student looking to find a place to smoke a quick one before heading off to class. Was class still going on? Or had Cid suspended class because of the war? Everyone was still recovering from the battle between Balamb and Galbadia Gardens, so no one was looking to fight anything right now, but had Cid allowed everyone to take a vacation? We'd left the Garden at Fisherman's Horizon. Were we still docked there?

The back of my head hit the stone of the wall behind me as I focused my eyes above me. I was losing the resolve of sitting here and waiting. I was going to get up at any second, I told myself. I was going to get up and I was going to find that son of a bitch Leonhart that was testing my patience to the last thread.

"Squall, where the fuck are you?" I whispered to the empty night air. Five more minutes, I told myself. Five more. That was it. Then I was going to get up and I was going to hunt him down.

Five minutes and a handful of seconds passed by me in stellar silence. Nothing happened. There were no footsteps, no sound of a voice. Just the ocean waves and the night sounds that the training center probably usually made.

"Fuck it." I said. I hauled myself to my feet and pushed away from the wall. I started down the short hall into the training ground proper and stared around at the dimly lit area. I readied Hyperion, figuring I'd be better off letting some of my frustration on helpless monsters and T-rexaurs than Squall when I finally caught up to him.

I came to the conclusion that leaving the training grounds entirely was probably stupider than me leaving the designated meeting spot. I could make circuits killing everything that dared throw itself at me and check the secret spot to see if Leonhart finally showed up. I don't know how many passes I made before my burning muscles finally beat out my temper and I found myself reclining on the floor of the secret place, staring up at the stars that pinpricked the sky. I'd folded my coat under my head to serve as a pillow and had my hands folded on my chest. Hyperion was propped against the wall nearby, ready and waiting if I needed it.

I saw the dark boots first. They just simply appeared in my peripheral, flickering into existence as merely a shadow. If I looked too hard, they would lose clarity, as if my attention was making the difference between existence and non-existence. So I sat up and twisted myself so I was leaning against the wall beside Hyperion, and closed my eyes. A chuckle escaped my throat. Maybe if I thought it, it would come true.

It was strange, I thought, that I could smell him before he even really fully came into existence, released from whatever power had kept him trapped for so goddamned long. Squall's scent was subtle and refined, like the air after the storm he'd been named for. I refused to open my eyes, waiting for him to make the first move. Maybe I could get the upper hand if he thought I was sleeping. Deception, after all, is a SeeD's greatest weapon.

I knew he'd become real when I felt his presence right before me. I imagined he was crouching, watching my face. Looking for a tell. He was trying to decide if I really was sleeping or not. I felt him reach out to touch my cheek. It was an exploratory touch, and I knew he was trying to get me to react. Then I heard him sigh.

"Seifer. You smell like blood."

I opened my eyes and looked up at him. Squall looked tired. There were bruises on his face that I didn't remember being there. His eyes were still bright and sharp, but they were soft when they gazed upon me. He crouched in front of me, perfectly balanced. Lion Heart lay on the ground beside him.

I grinned. "I got bored waiting for you."

He smiled. "I see."

"What took you so long?"

Squall's smile vanished. He rocked back on his heels for a minute, then sat on the ground cross-legged. I imitated his position and reached for his hands; they were ice-cold. I started gently massaging his palms and fingers, trying to get the blood moving to warm him up.

"I was wandering the wasteland again." he said quietly, watching me. I made a point of focusing on his knuckles and the gunblade callouses on his fingers. Squall tended to talk more if he wasn't being stared at. After a minute, he continued. "I couldn't find my way out again. It was like... I was doomed to end up there again. But I didn't see you. I didn't see anyone. I couldn't hear anyone. But then... then I saw my mother."

I looked up at him now, arching an eyebrow. Squall looked a little dazed. "She give you the bruises?" I asked.

Squall shook his head. "These came from fighting my way out of that false little world the Time Compression tried to build around me. I once existed in two times - my current body and my memories of Before - and I couldn't exist like that. So it built me a world where I could exist on my own, with everything I had ever wanted and dreamed of."

"So you had your mom. Sis. Your dad. A real chance of a family. A chance of a life without violence." I surmised.

Squall nodded slowly. "Everything I wanted."

"But you didn't stay."

His stormy blue-grey eyes focused on my face. "You weren't there."

I smiled lazily. "Well, Squally-boy, I'm touched. I would've thought I would've been, considering I'm everything you want."

He choked as he aborted his laugh. "You were. Just not... you. You acted different. You weren't as haughty and stuck up. You didn't curse every other word. There was no swagger or bravado. And you didn't know Fujin and Raijin."

I scoffed. "Fuck that me. Who thought a version of the powerful and awesome Seifer Almasy that acted like a chicken-wuss would fool you?"

Squall shrugged. He just watched my face as I scowled, thinking about his description of this other me. Then he leaned in, slowly, and pressed his lips to mine.

I responded immediately. I reached to cup the back of his head, deepening our kiss. I brushed my tongue over the soft flesh of his bottom lip, getting him to open up for me. As soon as he did, I slid my tongue into his mouth and turned the gentle action of kissing into a rough, physical fight for domination. I won, of course. Squall pulled back first, slightly red in the cheeks and panting for air. He was clutching my shirt, as if he was trying to keep me close. Like I wanted to get away from him. If anything, I wanted to get closer.

"Seifer," he breathed in a soft tone that made lightning sear my blood, "the other you didn't kiss like that."

"I don't know whether to feel grateful or jealous of myself." I said. Then I pulled him against me and kissed him again, harder this time.

Now that I had him, I wasn't going to let him go. I wasn't going to let him talk me into stopping and finding somewhere else to do what I was damn well going to do. I wasn't going to let him do more than say my name in that soft whisper of his, or make the barest of noises like he'd made when we had that moment in Fisherman's Horizon. I urged Squall up onto his knees. When he obeyed my command, I pulled his jacket off and tossed it on top of mine. Then I slid one hand beneath his white cotton shirt and ran my fingers over his stomach, heading upwards. His muscles twitched and flinched under my touch, and he pulled back from the kiss to breathe, staring down at my face as he gripped my shoulders.

"Seifer," Squall started.

I silenced him by brushing my fingertips over his left nipple, giving it a teasing pinch that made him tense, gasp, and then glower at me. I grinned in response. "Not this time, Squall. I've done everything you asked, pretty much without argument or question. I even fucking waited. Maybe not patiently, but I sure as hell waited. I don't wait. And I'm not waiting one more second."

His fingers flexed against my shoulders, gripping the material of my sleeveless shirt until it bunched in his grip. He didn't say anything, just stared at me, until at last he leaned down and kissed me.

I didn't need any more permission than that.

I practically pulled him down on top of me, moving my hands to his thighs to coax him into straddling me. When he did so, I slid my hands up his sides and back under his shirt, tracing the lines of muscles on his stomach and then up over his chest. His skin flinched under my fingers, but he continued to kiss me, so I knew he was enjoying himself. I eventually pulled his shirt off, leaving him half-naked on top of me. My hands moved from the front of his chest to his back, allowing my nails to dig into his shoulder-blades. Squall arched into the touch, breaking the kiss just to inhale sharply. Then he resumed kissing me, biting my lower lip to show his appreciation for the slight pinch of pain. I rewarded him by sliding my hands down from his shoulders to his ass, squeezing the flesh through the leather of his pants. That movement made him grind his hips into mine, eliciting a primal growl from each of us.

Squall pulled back from me long enough to pull my shirt off, leaving us both bare-chested. With him away from me like that, I was given the opportunity to kiss his chest and stomach, and I took it as fast as I could. My lips touched the pale flesh of his sternum, kissing and nipping and biting when I thought I could get away with it. After giving his nipples some exclusive attention, I pulled back to admire the bruises I'd given his body. Squall slumped a little against me, panting. One of his arms was hooked around my neck, keeping him from falling backwards, but it was mostly my hands on his backside that kept him from tumbling to the ground entirely.

"Seifer." Squall hissed into my ear, his breath hot against my skin. The arm around my neck shifted and I felt his fingers tangle in the short strands of my hair.

"I know." I replied. So I shifted us a little so I could move my hands from Squall's ass to the button and fly of his leather pants.

I didn't bother with foreplay now. Squall was done with it, and I honestly didn't have the patience for it now either. My fingers fumbled with his belts, button, and fly, but I finally got them open and down, and pulled the fabric away from his skin. I slipped my hand into his pants and wrapped my fingers around his cock. Squall's eyes fluttered shut and his mouth opened slightly to release a quick puff of air. His hips shifted upwards, allowing my free hand to pull his pants down a little further, thus freeing his cock from the leather. It gave me better leverage to tease him, giving him a repeat performance of FH. I moved my hand up and down his shaft, running my palm over the head of his hardened flesh, before squeezing as hard as I thought I could get away with. Squall panted and squirmed and made breathy little noises of pleasure. His fingers flexed on my shoulders and on the back of my neck and head, his hands constantly moving as if he couldn't find a place on my body to leave them. I thought about whispering dirty things to him, but he kissed me hard, effectively silencing me.

So much for that idea.

He moaned into my mouth, about the loudest sound he'd made to date. I felt wetness against my palm, spreading onto my fingers as I kept jerking him off. Squall broke the kiss suddenly and tossed his head back, baring his throat as he inhaled sharply through his mouth. He came, his essence ribboning out onto my fingers, which was then smeared across his flesh and mine by my continuous movement. It didn't take long for Squall to get hard again, especially when I started teasing that sensitive place just in the hollow of his throat with my tongue.

His nails dug crescents into my shoulders as I forced him backwards. He didn't want to be on his back, where he was in a vulnerable position. It took some coaxing from me before he released my shoulders and accepted lying beneath me on his back. He stared up at me, his stormy eyes focused on his face. Then his eyes dropped lower.

"You wanna see it that bad?" I asked, my tone joking.

Squall rolled his eyes. "I've seen it before."

"Yeah, but now you can appreciate it."

"Hn."

But he pushed himself up slightly to help me open my pants and get them pushed down. His gunblade-calloused fingers wrapped around my cock and gave it a tight, healthy squeeze. I couldn't help the cursing groan I gave at that, tangling my fingers in his chocolate brown hair. I pulled on his hair as he pulled on my flesh, making me bare my teeth in a pleasure-filled grimace. He definitely was appreciating me, in his own Leonhart way. I was surprised he didn't treat me the way he treated Lion Heart, gripping me with two hands. That thought made me chuckle, and in turn Squall looked at me with a confused expression.

"Nothing." I said, releasing his hair to push him back just enough to give me access to his cock again.

He gave me a healthy squeeze, making me curse. "You talk too much." he whispered.

"Someone's gotta make up for you." I replied, grinning widely.

Squall rolled his eyes and continued to stroke me. I leaned down and kissed him, pushing him back down where he balanced his weight on one elbow to keep himself from going completely flat. For a while, I complied with him, but when I felt my orgasm creeping up on me, I pulled back from him completely. He let me go with only a slight struggle, now watching me with that calculating gaze of his, analyzing me like I was an enemy. I didn't doubt he knew what I was intending to do now, just as I didn't doubt he could lunge for Lion Heart and cut me in two before I could even think of reaching for Hyperion. But he relaxed back, using our combined jackets as a pillow for his head.

Deciding to take a Squall-like approach to my next actions, I kept silent as I moved to grip his pants and pull them down to his ankles. I debated about turning him over, putting him onto his knees, but decided against it. I wanted to see his face. I wanted to see what expressions he made when we were moving together. Since he let me keep doing what I was doing, I knew he was trusting my decision when it came to this kind of thing. Except I didn't have a clue, except for the obvious, of course. I took off his boots and then those leather pants, leaving him completely naked. Being that vulnerable made him tense. It was a subtle movement, and if I didn't know him as well as I did, I'd have missed it. But since I noticed it, I knew I had to make him comfortable somehow, so I made myself completely naked too. Then I covered his body with mine, making sure I was between his thighs before I did. I wanted to get him used to me being there, so close to him. He needed to get used to being vulnerable, to being at the mercy of another person.

He breathed and wrapped his arms around my shoulders. He kissed me, a tentative, searching action. He was still tense, both from being exposed and being so close to me. My job now would be to get him to relax enough to let me try and figure out how to continue. Simple touches just wouldn't do the trick. He had to trust me. I kept still, letting him lead this time, until he gave me the barest of affirmative noises. I stared into his eyes as I moved my hands, settling them on his hips and massaging him there until he relaxed enough to tell me he was ready for the next step. I moved my right hand from his hip to his thigh, moving slowly more for my benefit than his. As much as I wanted this, I didn't have a fucking clue about how to get Squall ready for me. I mean, he was missing the exact equipment I was used to, after all.

"Wait." Squall said in a midnight whisper when my fingers moved from his thigh to the cleft of his ass.

I froze immediately, meeting his eyes. "Yeah?"

He was staring at me. His tongue darted out to wet his lips, and for a long minute, I thought he was going to push me away. But he instead shifted his legs just a little bit, giving me a bit more room to work. Then he looked up at me through his lashes.

I kissed him hard, then pulled back just enough so that our lips brushed together. "I'll try."

His arms, which were still around my shoulders, tightened, pulling me down to kiss him again. As soon as our kiss deepened and our tongues started to battle, I found his hole and steeled myself. I pushed a single digit inside Squall as far as I dared to, feeling him arch and gasp and tense. Our mouths came apart as he squirmed, his eyes closing tight for a minute. He made a soft noise that I took to mean he was uncomfortable or in pain, so I started to remove my finger.

"Don't."

I focused on his eyes. "You're hurting."

"It's uncomfortable. Different. Keep going."

A rumble of an exasperated laugh escaped me. "You're such a fucking masochist."

He scoffed and rolled his eyes, then shifted his hips expectantly. The motion pushed my finger deeper into him, and this time Squall didn't make a noise of pain. Instead the noise that escaped him was one of pleasure. His forehead pressed into my shoulder as he pulled himself closer to me, widening his legs a little more.

It was definitely different, trying to figure out how to get Squall ready. I was basically stretching the muscles of his asshole, muscles that really didn't want to cooperate no matter how much he relaxed. My confidence that I was doing something right, though, grew, only because Squall began to arch and squirm, his noises of pleasure coming more frequently as I found the angle that pleased him the most. By the time his teeth sank into my shoulder as his signal to stop fooling around and get on with it, we were both panting, sweaty messes.

I pulled my fingers from his body and pulled him practically into my lap. It was with a shaking hand that I gripped myself and positioned the head of my cock against Squall's hole. He tensed as he felt my body's heat and the pressure of me against him, but relaxed a few heartbeats later. Then I rolled my hips up into his and pushed inside him, inch by slow inch, until I was fully sheathed inside him.

We groaned at the same time. Squall tightened his arms around my neck, pressing us as close together as we could possibly get now. His legs wrapped around my hips, making sure I was staying hilt deep inside him. His forehead was pressed tight against my neck and I could feel his breath ghosting against the flesh of my collarbone. My arms were tight around his waist, keeping him close to me, and my cheek was pressed against his hair. I was staring up at the stars, feeling any conscious thought in my brain fizzle out into nothing.

"Seifer." Squall ordered.

"Yeah, yeah." I replied, panting. "You got it, princess."

His teeth sank into my shoulder as I rolled my hips up, pushing my cock deeper inside him. His passage was impossibly tight, tighter than I had thought he would be. And he was impossibly hot, for being so cold. Squall arched back when I buried myself in him again, presenting me with the pale expanse of his chest. I licked and kissed his skin, rolling my hips into his, feeling him move back against me.

I don't know how long we moved against each other. I don't know when our tempo changed from slow, trying to figure things out, to quick and sharp, driven by the incredible pleasure we were getting from one another. I groaned in response to Squall's feathery gasps and whimpers. Squall's body trembled from the sensation of my cock sliding out of him only to slam back in as deep as I could possibly go. Our mouths met, but we were panting too hard to have a real kiss, so it ended up being more of a hasty, teeth-clacking, sloppy meeting of the lips. He was trembling against me, growing tighter and tighter around me, until he finally let out a whimper-whine and his body became bow-string tight. Hot liquid ribbons smeared against my stomach as Squall came, and I wasn't far behind him. I pulled him tight against me as I groaned, louder than I had intended to, and gave in to my orgasm. Intense pleasure shot through me like greased lightning, and my body released every last drop of my seed into the deepest part of Squall.

I hadn't realized how tight my body had tensed up until the last dregs of my orgasm left me and I nearly dropped Squall because my arms suddenly felt like jelly. If he hadn't been holding onto my shoulders, he probably would've fallen flat onto his back. He let out a long breath and loosened the hold his legs had on me, putting weight back on his feet. He shifted his head and looked me in the eyes.

"Was it as good for you as it was for me?" I quipped.

The corner's of Squall's lips twitched. "I'd like to do it again." he said at last.

I grinned. "I believe there's a saying that goes 'great minds think alike'."

"...But not right now."

The laugh that escaped me was one part disappointed, one part relieved, and one part accepting. "I guess we do need to stop fooling around."

Squall smiled a little wider. "I have some promises to keep."

"I didn't invite anyone else on this vacation of ours."

"Tying up loose ends." Squall said.

"Fuck the loose ends." I responded, trying to keep Squall against me.

It was like trying to keep water from escaping a bucket with holes punched in the bottom. He pulled away from me, allowing me to slip from his body. It took us both a moment to figure out how to stand again, but when we did, we retrieved our clothes and dressed. As soon as we were decent, Squall pressed his lips to mine, then leaned back with a slight quirk to his lips.

I pulled back and retrieved Hyperion with a wide grin. "I'm good with that."


	39. Chapter 39

Thirty-Nine - Epilogue - Squall POV

I had gone to the party thrown in our honor because it was, I believed, required of me at this point. Seifer went with me, even though he complained about the lousy food and drinks the entire time. I pointed out that we didn't have much of a budget to get the good stuff, considering we were a school before anything else, and he then pointed out that I was the SeeD Commander, and my first paycheck alone would've been able to buy at least him and I something better to eat than hot dogs. I had actually found myself agreeing with him, but it was too late, only because I hadn't been in charge of the party.

And we had been a little too busy to stop Selphie from helping Zell raid the kitchen.

After we had finished with the congratulations, and the joy of Matron and Cid being back together, and the relief that we had all survived the Time Compression, Seifer and I had made our separate excuses and went to tie up our own loose ends. Seifer went to find Fujin and Raijin to explain to them why he'd basically kicked them to the curb in order to fight with me and my group, and they were surprisingly understanding. Fujin more so than Raijin, of course. Fujin understood that, while Seifer went out onto the front lines, he needed her and Raijin to stay and watch his back. To protect what he couldn't. And they had done a rather good job, ensuring the safety of all of Balamb's students when we had jumped ship at Fisherman's Horizon, and ensuring that no one caused any more trouble while we dealt with Esthar and Lunatic Pandora and Ultimecia. Somehow, Fujin even managed to keep Xu in line, and keep her from overstepping her authority in my absence.

I mentioned to Seifer that maybe I should promote Fujin, and he only laughed at me.

My own loose ends revolved around Galbadia's new President, settling things with Rinoa, and settling things with my own family. It took a few weeks of negotiating before Galbadia relented enough to allow General Caraway to take interim power. Rinoa and her father seemed to be getting along better after they spent a few days talking. Her status as a Sorceress probably had plenty to do with that, as well as an honorary SeeD. Instead of returning to Timber, Rinoa chose to stay in Balamb Garden with us, which was a prudent decision. Being a Sorceress, Rinoa still would be in a certain amount of danger from people who were terrified of her kind on principle, and neither of us had forgotten how we'd thumbed our noses at the Estharian military. She spent most of her time in the infirmary, playing assistant to Dr. Kadowaki. Otherwise, she was usually with me, or with Seifer, or with us both, if we headed down to the training grounds. She watched us while Seifer and I fought, a spectacle that tended to draw a crowd more often than not. I think Rinoa started selling tickets.

Once I had arranged everything to run as smoothly as possible in my absence, I packed a bag. I left clear instructions with Rinoa, who seemed a little too gleeful, but she promised she'd hold the fort.

Seifer was waiting for me in the Ragnarok, casually lounging in the pilot's seat. His own bag occupied one of the passenger seats.

"I was wondering when you'd get around to joining me, princess." Seifer said with a grin.

I grunted at him.

"Hey, this is a words-only zone."

I sat in the chair beside him. "Go."

"As you wish, oh great Commander Leonhart."

I glowered at him. He just grinned at me.

We arrived in Esthar and met with my father and Ellone. The first meetings were awkward at first, as neither I nor Laguna knew what to say to each other. Ellone's attempts to break the ice between us were met with my stellar silence and Laguna's nervous laugh, which only served to make her feel embarrassed. Seifer only stood by me, a silent shadow, watching and weighing everything that was going on. I was surprised he kept his silence, considering how sensitive he was to my moods. I was sure that, the one time I got a little upset, he was going to jump on my father and shake him like a ragdoll.

It wasn't easy for either of us. Laguna didn't know how to be a father, and I didn't know how to be a son. It hurt him, visibly and physically, to talk about Mother. Things that were simple, emotionless, were easier for the both of us to talk about. I learned that Laguna wasn't the idiot he acted like. There was a terrifyingly sharp and precise mind behind those sea-green eyes of his. I caught glimpses of the man who took on an entire country's status quo without flinching, glimpses of the man who had remained the ruler of that same country for over a decade, and glimpses of the man my mother had fallen in love with. We sort of fell into a working relationship over the course of my stay.

He did, however, accompany Seifer and I to Winhill. So did Kiros, Ward, and Ellone.

I spent most of my time there wandering around the village, looking at the things that had been reconstructed and changed around. I found my mother's house, which now had a new family living in it, so I was stuck looking at it from afar. This was the place where I was born. This was where my father stayed, where my mother lived, and where she died.

I visited her grave. I stood side by side with my father, and we stared down at the headstone that bore her name. We said nothing to each other, but somehow, Laguna's hand found my shoulder and gave it a tight squeeze. There was more said in that one gesture than he'd said to me the entire time we had been together. I had to leave before I started crying in front of him.

Seifer followed me to the field of wildflowers, a silent, solid presence while he let me have my moment of weakness. After a little while, I heard him approach and felt him against my back. His arms wrapped around my shoulders and pulled me tight against him. His cheek rested against my hair and he said nothing. We stared at the grazing chocobos together until I was ready to turn around and look him in the eye.

Seifer gestured to my face. "You still got tears on your eyelashes."

I gave a weak laugh and used my jacket's sleeve to paw at my face. Then I gave Seifer a playful shove. He only snorted and shoved me back. "Sorry." I whispered.

"Don't be. You've gotten more of an emotional overload today than you have in all the eighteen years you've been alive. All that Before doesn't count."

I just looked at him.

Seifer smiled. "Look, Leonhart, you deserve to have a day where you don't have to wear that armor you've constructed for yourself. I get it. It's more than most orphans get."

I looked at him a little harder.

He waved his hand dismissively. "Nah, I could care less about where I came from. This whole trip was for you."

I nodded. I looked away, toward where the figures of my father and Ellone stood, holding onto each other. Then I looked at Seifer again and tilted my head.

"Where do I want to go on vacation? How many days do we have left?"

I shrugged. "I'm the Commander of SeeD. However damn long we want."

Seifer's lips split in a broad grin. He folded his arms over his chest and tilted his head back so he could observe the sky for a while. I could tell he was considering my question seriously, thinking about the myriad different places we could go where we hadn't been yet. Or, return to places we had been. Finally, he looked back at me, his grin lessening into a smile.

I tilted my head.

"It's not so much a vacation, but there _is_ a beach. And I'm sure Edea wouldn't mind us crashing for a while."

"You want to rebuild the orphanage?"

"Why not? I'm pretty good with my hands. You've said so yourself."

Despite myself, I felt my cheeks heat. "That's different."

"So I'll build us our own room. Hell, I can build us our own little place on the property, if Edea will let me. You can help. You know how to use a hammer?"

I'm pretty sure my glower answered that question, since Seifer took a slight step away from me despite continuing to grin. I rolled my eyes and sighed. "Rinoa will want to help." I said.

"She can."

"So will the others."

He grimaced. "I guess they could, too."

"You're going to build our own place?"

His hand brushed my cheek before it hooked behind my neck and gripped tight. His forehead touched mine, leaving me no room to look away from his bright emerald eyes. His lips quirked in a slight smile. "I'll even let you pick out the furniture."

I sighed softly, but leaned up and kissed him anyway.

Seifer threw back his head and laughed then, before sobering and saying, "I'm good with that!"


End file.
